Narcissus in Chains ab-10

by Laurell Hamilton

  "I'll keep a lid on it, Anita, but I can only guarantee my people."

  "I know, Dolph, but Andy Talbot wants to be a doctor. He'll never get into med school once this comes out. Rebecca Morton is a chiropractor. If they find out what she is, they'll yank her license."

  "Why is it that most of these people go in for professions where this is a problem?"

  I shrugged, knew he couldn't see it. "Just lucky, I guess."

  "I think it's stubbornness," Dolph said.

  "What do you mean?"

  "Tell anyone that they can't do something, and they'll want to do it."

  He had a good point. "Makes sense."

  "How do these disappearances tie in to the attack on your house?"

  Damn, the whole truth, I'd said. There was my chance to prove it. I took a deep breath and told him almost all of the truth. I told him that Gregory had called for help, leaving out why he'd call me. Dolph never questioned that I'd be a good choice when calling for rescue from the monsters. He did say, "He could have called the police."

  "It hasn't been that long since the police killed wereanimals on sight, Dolph. You can't really blame them for being leery of you guys."

  "Why didn't you tell me all this when you were in for questioning?"

  "You were mad at me," I said, as if that explained it. And it sort of did, though it made me sound childish.

  "What are you leaving out?" he asked.

  "I tell you the truth, and you still doubt me. That really hurts, Dolph,"

  "Not as much as it's going to if I find out you withheld evidence on this."

  "It's not like you to make threats, Dolph."

  "I'm tired," he said.

  I was quiet for a second. "You should get some rest, Dolph."

  "Yeah, if you can keep from killing anyone else, maybe I'll catch up on the paperwork."

  "I'll do my best," I said.

  "You do that." I heard him take a deep breath. "Is this all the information you're going to give me on this?"

  "Yep."

  "I'll go back and interview the families again. Do you know how much extra work this is going to be, just because they fucking lied the first time?"

  "They didn't mean to make your job hard, Dolph, they were just scared."

  "Yeah, so isn't everyone?" With that, he hung up.

  I stared at the buzzing phone. The man was not in a good mood. I knew why, now, and I was probably one of the few outside his family that did know why. I wondered how much grouchier he was going to get, and if it would start affecting his job, if it hadn't already. If his hatred of the monsters took away his objectivity, then he was going to be useless as the head of the Regional Preternatural Investigation Team. Shit. It was a problem for another day. I could add it to the list of things I'd worry about later. At the rate the list was growing, I'd never have time to worry about everything on it. Maybe I could throw a dart and make what it stuck in the problem of the day. Or maybe I could just ignore the list. Yeah, ignoring sounded good.

  46

  THE MACNAIRS, PLUS bodyguard, promised to drive straight to RPIT's headquarters and give statements. Janet Talbot went with them. Christine didn't really know anything about the werelion's disappearance, so she just went home, promising to be careful. I offered to let her stay at my place until the bad guy, or guys, was caught, but she turned me down flat.

  Donovan Reece said, "She is an independent creature."

  I could admire that. "I hope her independence doesn't get her hurt."

  He shrugged, getting to his feet. I noticed a lump under the front of his pink shirt. "You're armed," I said.

  He glanced down at the place where his gun was trying and failing to hide. "I won't let my girls be taken again."

  "People, call them people," I said.

  He gave me a smile. "They are all girls."

  "Humor me," I said.

  He gave a small bow of his head. "My people, fine, but I won't let them be taken again."

  "Or you either, Donovan. Remember everyone that's vanished has been a leader, not a follower. They chained Nathaniel up because they thought he was you; your people being taken was just incidental."

  He met my eyes, suddenly very serious. "You're right. How did you know I was armed?"

  "If you're going to tuck a gun into the front of your pants, wear a darker-colored shirt, and maybe one that's a size bigger."

  He nodded. "I've never carried a gun before."

  "Do you know how to use it?"

  "I know how to shoot. I just don't usually carry concealed."

  "Do you have a license to carry?"

  He blinked at me.

  "I take that as a no."

  "No," he said.

  "Then if you use it and kill someone, it's going to be a headache in court. Carrying concealed without a license will make it an illegal weapon. Depending on the judge, you might see jail time."

  "How long does it take to get a license?"

  "Longer than you'll want to wait. But check your county and start the process. Or don't start the process, and when you get arrested you can try and claim ignorance of the law. It's not a legal excuse, but it might sway a judge. I don't know. I'd apply for a license and hope it goes through."

  "What do I have to do to apply?"

  "It differs from county to county. Check with your local police. They'll know who you have to see."

  He nodded again. "I'll do that." He looked at me, gray eyes so serious. "Thank you, Anita."

  I shrugged. "Just doing my job."

  He shook his head. "This isn't your job. You're no one's alpha here. You could have just refused to help us."

  "And what good would that have done?" I asked.

  "Most of the wereanimals won't help each other."

  "You know of all the furry--and feathered--politics, that's the one I understand the least. Just like now, what happens to one group can affect the others. If you guys had been talking to each other, then you'd have known that Henry MacNair went missing, violently missing. It might have put all of you on guard."

  "You think it would have prevented the other disappearances?"

  "I don't know, but it might have helped. People would have been more cautious, maybe not gone out alone. We might have at least had witnesses."

  "It was after my girls--people--got taken and you helped us that Christine came to me. She knew about the bears' Ursa having gone missing. It was Ethan MacNair, not his mother, that told us about his father."

  "I bet he paid for going outside his mother's orders," I said.

  "Probably," Donovan said, "but you're right, if we'd just bloody talk to each other, we could help each other more."

  "Not just in emergencies either," I said.

  His eyes narrowed. "You mean a coalition of wereanimals?"

  I shrugged. "I hadn't thought that far ahead, but why not? Something where we share information. We've got a lion working with a bunch of snakes. Why should the bad guys get along better than we do?"

  "Every time one of the animals talks about joining forces they always mean that they'll be top ... dog. You want to be everybody's Nimir-Ra, Anita?"

  "I'm not talking sharing authority. That'll never work without a war. I'm just saying share information, help each other more. When one of the leopards or wolves gets hurt, he, or she, has a place to stay until they're well. That kind of thing."

  "Someone would need to be in charge of it."

  I felt like grabbing him by the front of the shirt and shaking him. "Why, Donovan, why does anyone have to be in charge? Something happens to one of your swans, you pick up the phone and call me, or Ethan, or Christine. We call someone else. We try to help each other. We don't need a hierarchy, just a willingness to cooperate."

  He looked unhappy, almost suspicious. "You don't want to be in charge."

  I shook my head. "Donovan, I don't even want to be in charge of what I'm in charge of now. I sure as hell don't want to add to it."

  It was Micah, who had been leaning ag
ainst the wall, so still, so calm that: you forgot he was there, who said, "She's offering you friendship, Donovan "

  "Friendship?" He made it sound like a foreign concept.

  Micah nodded, pushing away from the wall to stand beside me. "If something goes wrong and you need help, you call your friends."

  Donovan frowned hard enough that he formed lines in that flawless skin. "Wereanimals aren't even friends with each other, let alone across species lines."

  "That's not true," I said. "Richard," I paused after I'd said his name, as if it hurt, or I was waiting for it to hurt. Micah touched my shoulder, and I put my hand over his, held on. I tried again. "Richard's best friend is one of Rafael's rats. My leopard Vivian is living with, and in love with, Stephen, one of Richard's wolves."

  "That's different."

  "Why?"

  "Because the wolves and rats have a treaty, and through you the leopards and the wolves are joined."

  I shook my head. "You're quibbling, Donovan, or deliberately missing the point. Let's just agree to try and help each other, that's all. I don't have any ulterior motives. I'm just trying to keep the damage to a minimum."

  "It's true you didn't have to save my girls. It nearly cost you your life."

  "And you didn't have to go to the lupanar with me. But you did. That's how it works, cooperation."

  He thought for a moment, then nodded. "Agreed. I'll try to get the others to agree also. You're right, you are right. If we'd just talk to each other, we could prevent a lot of bad things from happening."

  "Great," I said, and let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. I wanted this. I wanted them to talk to each other, to help each other.

  Someone cleared their throat, softly. It made us all look at Gil. He was still huddled beside the couch, where he'd been the entire time. "You have something to say?" Donovan asked.

  "How far does this new spirit of cooperation go?" he asked. His uptilted green eyes were almost round with anxiety. He gripped his knees so hard his hands were mottled. He was scared; you could smell it on him, that and a neck-ruffling scent that I didn't recognize.

  "What do you mean?" Donovan asked.

  "I'm actually talking to Anita," Gil said.

  I glanced at Micah then back to the man huddled on the floor. "What do you want to know?" I asked.

  "I'm the only werefox in town. I don't have an alpha, or any family." He stopped there and licked his lips nervously.

  "And?" I said.

  "How much help are you willing to give?"

  "How much do you need?"

  "Can I stay with you until this thing, or whatever, is caught?"

  I felt my eyes go wide. I opened my mouth, closed it, exchanged a look with Micah. He shrugged. "It has to be your call. It's your house."

  Point. I turned back to Gil. "I don't know you at all. If you are a bad person, and you do bad things to my people, I will kill you, but if you really just want someplace to hide for a few days, you can stay."

  He seemed to get smaller, more huddled. "I won't hurt anybody. I just want to feel safe again, that's all."

  I looked at Donovan. "Do you know anything about him?"

  "He's scared of his own shadow. I wouldn't trust him to help in an emergency. I think he'd save himself first."

  Gil didn't argue with Donovan's estimation of him, he just huddled, trembling. "If we only help the strong ones, then we're not helping ourselves," I said.

  "You'll take him in, knowing he can't help you in a fight, and would probably run to save his own skin?" Donovan asked.

  I looked at those wide, terror-filled eyes and saw something besides fear, a pleading. They said, "Please, please help me."

  "You can stay, and we'll protect you, but if there is an emergency I expect you to do your best. You don't have to fight, but don't be a hindrance."

  "What's that mean?" he asked.

  "It means if the guns come out, hide under something, get low to the ground. Don't make yourself a target. If my people get hurt and you have a chance to drag them to safety but leave them to die instead, you'll be next."

  "I'm not brave, Anita, I'm not even a little bit brave."

  "Don't be brave, Gil, just do what you're told, do your best whatever that is, but understand the rules. Keep yourself out of the line of fire because we won't have time to worry about you when the fighting starts. Help if you can, stay out of the way if you can't. Simple."

  He nodded, rubbing his chin between his knees, over and over. "Simple," he whispered, "I wish life were simple."

  "Life isn't simple, Gil, but a fight is." I knelt in front of him, and I hated the weakness that radiated from him. Dear God, the last thing I needed was another emotional cripple following me around. But I couldn't kick him out. Anita the bleeding heart, who'd have thought it? I stared at him, until his frightened eyes met mine. "A fight is simple, Gil. You protect yourself, your people, and you kill the bad guys. You do whatever it takes to get yourself and your people out alive."

  "How do you know who the bad guys are?" he asked, voice almost a whisper.

  "Anyone in the room that isn't us," I said.

  "And you kill them, just like that?"

  I nodded. "Exactly," I said.

  "I don't think I could kill anyone."

  "Then hide."

  He did that chin-rubbing nod thing again, like he was scent marking his own knees. "I can hide, I know how to do that."

  I touched his face very gently. He flinched, then relaxed a little. All the animals liked to be touched. "I'm not very good at hiding, maybe you can teach me."

  "Why would you need to know how to hide?" he asked.

  "Because there's always someone, or something, bigger and badder than you are."

  "I can teach you how to hide, but I don't know if I can learn how to kill."

  Where had I heard that before? Oh, I knew--Richard. But even he had learned how, in the end. "You'd be surprised what you can learn, Gil, if you have to."

  He hugged himself again. "I don't think I want to learn how to kill people."

  "Now that," I said, "is a different problem altogether."

  "I don't want to," he said.

  I stared down at him. "Then don't, but don't let your squeamishness get any of my people killed."

  "It's more likely to kill me."

  "True, but that's your choice--get yourself killed if you want, but don't bring harm to me or mine because of some moral high ground."

  "Would you really kill me for it?"

  I knelt back in front of him. "You can stay with me and I'll keep you safe, or die trying, but if you fuck up and cause the death of one of my leopards, or my friends, I will kill you. I don't want you to be crying later and saying you didn't understand. Because if you've earned it, I will shoot you while you beg me not to."

  "But who decides whether I deserve it?" he asked.

  "I do."

  He stared up at me as if he weren't sure if he was safer with me or without me. I watched him think it through and felt nothing, no pity. Because Gil the werefox was a liability. In a combat situation he was a fucking casualty waiting to happen. I was civilized enough to give him protection when he asked, but not civilized enough to pay in the blood of those I held dear. In that moment I knew I wasn't a sociopath, because if I had been, I'd have kicked his ass out the door. Oh, hell, I'd have shot him and put him out of everyone's misery. Instead I offered him a hand, and pulled him to his feet.

  "Do you understand the rules?" I asked.

  "I understand," he whispered.

  "You willing to live by them?"

  He gave one small nod.

  "You willing to die by them?"

  He took a shaky breath, then gave another nod.

  I smiled and knew it never reached my eyes. "Then welcome to the club, and keep your head down. There's some business we have to take care of tonight. You can come along." Even I wasn't sure if that was an invitation or a threat.

  47

  THERE WAS STILL a th
read of light in the sky, like a slender golden ribbon, glowing against the push of dark, dark clouds when we parked in the back of the Circus of the Damned. The back parking lot was for employees. It was dark, bare, not the least bit entertaining, unlike the front, which was like a carnival. I'd driven past the bright lights and dramatic posters without a second glance.

  "Did the clowns up front have fangs?" Caleb asked.

  It wasn't until he asked that that I realized that none of them had ever been to the Circus. I undid my seat belt and leaned around so I could see him in the middle section of seats. He was sitting pressed against the door with Merle's broad shoulders crowding him. Nathaniel was on the other side of Merle. Cherry and Zane were in the back seats with Gil. Micah was sitting up front with me. Until we knew my house wasn't a free-fire zone we'd keep everybody together. Rafael had sent two new bodyguards over, but they'd arrived just as we were leaving, and I wouldn't make anyone in the Jeep move. They followed us, not happy, but taking orders, which was good.

  I answered Caleb's question. "Yeah, the big spinning clowns on top of the sign have fangs."

  "I saw a poster for zombie raisings. Do you do that?" Merle asked.

  I shook my head. "I don't believe in using God-given gifts for entertainment purposes."

  "I didn't mean to insult you," he said.

  I shrugged. "Sorry, I'm a little touchy about shit like that. I don't approve of a lot of things some of my fellow animators do for money."

  "You raise the dead for money," Caleb said.

  I nodded. "Yeah, but I've turned down more money than I've taken."

  "Turned down, why?" he asked.

  I shrugged. "Local money who wanted to have his Halloween party in a cemetery so I could raise zombies at midnight. Or the guy that had offered a million if I could raise Marilyn Monroe and guarantee that she'd do anything he asked for a night." I shuddered. "I told that one if I even heard a rumor that he'd gotten someone to do the job, I'd see his ass in prison."

  Caleb's eyes were a little wide. I think I'd shocked him. Good to know that I could. "You're deeply moral," Merle said, a tone in his voice like he was surprised.