Myth-Fortunes m-19

by Robert Asprin

  "I will have so much more status if I can say that the visiting Klahd magician Skeeve the Magnificent shops here!"

  "You will tell people who see you wear this, and everyone will come to me to buy one and I shall be rich! It would so benefit us both. Come back, come back!"

  Most of the time I just smiled and kept walking, promising to go back some time, but I bought a few knickknacks just to enjoy the bargaining. I felt at home. Yes, the Kazbah was a lot like the Bazaar, traders, pickpockets, prostitutes, gullible travelers, and all.

  My mind was on Aahz. He had dozens of clients lined up to see sites in Phase Two over the coming weeks, but I could tell his heart wasn't in it any longer. He was worried about the rumors that would start when it came out that a curse came with the location. What could we do about that? Treat it as some kind of premium? He had already had to give a refund to Bendix. That meant his commission was gone, too. A rug merchant from the Bazaar had wanted to sell sublets on his own. We were afraid if he did, an exponential accumulation of bad luck would devolve upon Aahz and Samwise. The more shares that were sold, the more risk they took. I couldn't think what would be worse than what had already happened, and I didn't want to find out. Diksen had apologized to us, but he had been firm. The curse stayed as long as the pyramids did. Yet we were all too committed to back out. Samwise had bills for materials, workers' salaries, advertising, magicians' fees, and union dues. He had to go on.

  So did Aahz. He really, really wanted that top spot on Phase Two. He had already commissioned Ay-Talek to start on his stone herself. He had furnished the scribe with dozens of scrolls containing his exploits. She had exhibited the first glyphs she had carved on the side. They were beautifully rendered, though spelling out 'Pervect' had taken some tactful images.

  Samwise avoided both of us whenever possible. He had put us in a terrible position. I would have left Ghordon in a minute and never returned, but we had to find a way to take the curse off Aahz. At the moment, Diksen's little booby-trap was still a secret, known only to the three of us, See-Ker's folks, and the friends whom Aahz had brought in as a strike force. None of those would tell, but who else had overheard our discussions? Ghords seemed to live to gossip. Glyphs seemed to shoot around the construction zone more often than before—or perhaps I was just more aware of it than I had been. We had to behave as if news of the curse could slip out at any time. Aahz spoke of damage control, but that went right back to not knowing just how to spin that piece of news. I didn't know what Samwise and Aahz would do if word got back to the Pharaoh. Considering how often he turned up underfoot, I was surprised Gurn hadn't managed to insinuate himself into our conference the other night.

  I wandered into a narrow little street of cracked paving stones lined with open-topped wagons filled to the brim with odd merchandise, almost all of it worthless. I used my inner eye to look for magik items, but there was little to be had. Anything there with a touch of magik tended to have been doctored with a

  pinch of Pyxie dust (citrus flavored) and a wink for the gullible. My hand lit upon one item that had a little glamour upon it. I realized I was holding a model of Diksen's pyramid. It was hollow underneath.

  "Ah, sir," exclaimed the lizard-faced Ghord behind the wagon. "That is one of my most popular wares."

  "What's it for?" I asked.

  "It is used to store cheese," he said. "The power of the pyramid prevents it from aging. Here! See the one I use for myself." He took an identical curio from the counter behind him and held it out to me. A chunk of grayish cheese lay on a square dish beneath. I thought it smelled pretty terrible anyhow.

  "I'm looking for a present for a friend, but he doesn't eat much cheese." "It will also preserve beer," the merchant said hopefully. "He never lets his beer get old."

  The reptilian Ghord whisked it away. "Well, then, sir, this is not for you. Is there anything else I can help with?"

  A thought struck me, and I made my way back toward the Avenue of the Magicians. Like the items in the barrows, most of their wares were fakes, too, but I found a couple of rival vendors selling scrolls and books of magik.

  "You want what?" asked the first grimoire salesman I asked.

  "Cures for magikal ailments," I said. "What to do if you accidentally pick up a bad amulet, or annoy one of the Ancients."

  "For that, you wish 1,001 Forms of Propitiation," he suggested, handing me a hefty volume with a thick layer of dust on the cover. "The best way to get around the Ancients is to smother them with kindness. Here are all the known rituals and offerings for each of the old Ghords."

  I fended off that book, as well as half a dozen others he suggested. None had anything to do with curses. I rephrased my query for the second sales-Ghord, a female with a nearsighted rodent's head. She frowned, her long teeth chewing at her lower lip.

  "Sounds like a specialist job to me, young friend. How about a gazetteer to the dimension instead?"

  "Say," I said, as if an idea struck me. "Do you ever sell anything to a magician named Diksen?"

  The question caused both merchants to roll up like their own goods. I retreated. It wasn't going to be that easy to undo a spell without the caster cooperating.

  Perhaps it would be better to concentrate on gift-buying. I made for the Avenue of the Jewelers. On one of her visits, the Pharaoh had worn a headband and a broad necklace made of jewels, either of which would have looked terrific on M.Y.T.H., Inc.'s new president for dress occasions. I wondered if I could find the jeweler who had made them. Since she had started choosing her own clothes, Bunny dressed fairly conservatively, but somehow her outfits managed to make her look even more sexy and appealing than the scanty garments had. When she dressed up to go out, she looked like a million gold pieces. For sticking with me during the months I spent finding myself I owed her my respect and loyalty, but a couple of little presents now and again were welcome, too. For Tananda, I thought a pretty bracelet would please her. The jewelers were delighted to talk design with me, and at least ten of them produced drawings of pieces they could produce in short order with as many gemstones as I liked, providing price was no object. I promised to consider and get back to them.

  A weird aroma caught my nose and drew me halfway down a narrow passage. I found myself at a

  cookshop where the long-nosed birdman behind the counter was flipping a mass of something in a frying pan.

  "Fresh food!" he informed me.

  I peered at the mixture. It looked like gravel mixed with green sand. "Is it animal, vegetable, or mineral?"

  "Better not to ask, young sir," the birdman said. "But it is delicious! Try some! Take a chance! Your stomach will thank you. Only a copper coin." I reached for my belt pouch.

  "Don't pay more than half a copper," a soft voice at my shoulder said.

  I spun around. Matt stood beside me. Her cats wound around our feet.

  "Hi, there," I said, smiling.

  Her warm, tanned cheeks turned rosy.

  "Good afternoon. My-Nah is a good cook, but he tends to overcharge tourists. Don't you?" she asked the birdman.

  He bowed. "Pretty ladies like you make me forget all about profit," he said.

  "Were you going to have lunch here?" I asked, glancing around. "Why don't you join me?"

  "Well, I. . . " She hesitated. "Yes, thank you."

  "Two bowls," I said. "And wine?"

  "Fruit juice, thank you, sir. I must go back to work this afternoon."

  I handed the birdman a copper coin and visited the booth next to his for freshly-squeezed juices. By the time I returned, Matt was sitting bolt upright upon one of the shabby wooden stools at one of the communal tables sheltered by a pink fabric canopy in the passage. She had placed a portion of her food on a solid gold plate under her chair for the cats.

  I took a couple of gingerly spoonfuls of My-Nah's food while Matt watched.

  "How is it?" she asked.

  "I've had worse," I said, trying to sound cheerful. It tasted like some of the nondescript bowls of food I'd
bought from street vendors in the Bazaar. Nothing special, but not fatal to the diner, either.

  She laughed. "It is nourishing. Beyond that I do not ask. It is either that or bring my own lunch. I am too busy when I leave for work in the morning."

  An awkward silence fell. I thought back hastily to the dating lessons that Bunny, Tananda, and the others tried to hammer into me. Not that this was a date, per se, but she was a pretty girl, and I found myself unexpectedly tongue-tied trying to make conversation. "Ask her about herself," Bunny had suggested. "Show an interest."

  "Do you like working for Diksen?" I stammered out. It was the first thing I could think of.

  Matt didn't seem to find the question offensive. "He is not a bad boss. He pays well and he is not unreasonable in his requirements." She took a bite of her own food, then looked up at me shyly. "I am

  sorry that he treated you so poorly. He likes his privacy. He was not happy about having his former employee set up business so close to his, in every way!"

  "Yeah, we were a little surprised to find out just how close," I said, with a grim thought for Samwise.

  "It is not your fault," Matt assured me. "Are you recovered from your misadventure? You are not harmed in any way?" She studied me solicitously. "You have a bruise on your temple!"

  "I'm fine," I said. I basked in her sympathy. It felt nice to have a pretty girl paying attention to me. "I just wish we could have solved the problem. Aahz is my best friend. I'm really worried about him. He's got a lot at stake, and your boss's curse is making it impossible for him to do the job he was hired to do."

  Matt didn't reply. She hastily picked up her juice and took a sip.

  I realized once again that I'd been the one to kill the conversation. My problems were not her concern. I ate some of my food and tried to think of a pleasant subject.

  "So, what do you like . . . ?" I began.

  "And how do you find Aegis . . . ?" she said at the same time.

  We both laughed.

  At the next table, a couple of girls were talking over a bowl of My-Nah's who-knew-what? One of them had a long narrow head with oval ears and long, flexible lips. Her golden-furred face rose on a long neck spotted with huge brown oval blotches. The other had a bird face with a short hooked beak. They were talking excitedly in low tones, but perfectly audible to us. I smiled to myself. Ghords seemed to live to gossip—or glyph, which amounted to the same thing.

  "... But do you believe it?" the first one asked the other, her voice suddenly audible over the racket in the street. "In the supply closet! That is just asking to be found, isn't it?"

  "Well, you know what they say about them. She said he was absolutely wild .. . !"

  "How fabulous!" the first one giggled.

  "I know."

  They dropped off again into inaudibility, but it had been enough. My cheeks burned. I wanted to climb under the table. I knew who they were talking about and, to my horror, so did Matt. She smiled and shook her head.

  "That is typical gossip, I am afraid," Matt said, not without sympathy. "Even I have been getting messages from friends about what is happening on the construction site."

  I cringed. "And do you pass them along to your boss?" I asked.

  She looked shocked. "No! Why would you ask such a thing? Messages are private. Oh, it is only your friend's bad luck that he chose her. Tauret is such a big mouth. Almost any other woman in that office would have been more discreet."

  I didn't intend to tell Aahz how far word of his close encounter had gone. It could have been a function of the curse that caused him to choose the one girl who kissed and told. Or simple bad luck. There was no way to know for sure. It would be cruel to rub it in.

  "Mer-ow!" one of the cats said, coming out from beneath Matt's stool.

  She stood up and smiled at me. I scrambled to my feet. "I am sorry," she said. "I must go back. Thank you for our lunch. And thank you so much for arranging my ride home the other night."

  "My pleasure," I said honestly. "It's our fault you were late getting away."

  "You are kind. I wish you good fortune. If there is ever anything I can do for you, please ask me."

  "Unless you know how to unlock the curse," I said, wryly, "I don't know what there is."

  "I cannot go against my employer," Matt said, immediately tense.

  "I wouldn't ask you to," I assured her. "Thanks for the offer, though. It was really nice having lunch with you."

  Matt looked surprised, as if it had not occurred to her. "Yes, it was. Goodbye now." She and the cats disappeared into the crowd.

  Whistling, I made my way to my rendezvous point with my Camel.

  Chapter 25

  "What am I? A mind-reader?"

  —The Rowan

  Beltasar met me at the pier. The Scarab held out a sheaf of miniature documents. "Sign these."

  "What are they?" I asked.

  "Work orders," she said, buzzing in a circle around my head. "There are eight blocks to be moved, and no paperwork has been filed. I cannot locate Samwise. I cannot find your friend, who ordered that nothing be signed except by him or by Samwise in his presence. But you are his partner, so will you initial them so we can get going? We are burning daylight!"

  I looked them over quickly. Glyphs were still difficult for me to make out, but each of these was almost alike, except for the name of the owner of each stone, and the coordinates of the location to which it was going. I took the pencil from the hovering Scarab and dashed off my name on each one.

  "Thank you," she said, and shot away.

  Where was Aahz?

  I went back to the And Company office. He wasn't in our studio. I checked all the offices. No Aahz.

  "He has not been in here in hours," said Miss Tauret. She

  looked a trifle miffed. I thanked her and went out to ask around the site.

  "Aahz?" asked Lol-Kit, the female scribe. "The male with the face of Sober?"

  "That's right," I said. I had been walking around for an hour without luck.

  "Oh, he went over there some time ago," she said.

  "Where?"

  "Up there." She pointed a delicate claw toward the sky. I squinted into the sun, and made out a small black object hovering in the sky. "Yes, he is still there. He has been lying there for hours."

  I panted my way up the steps to the top of Phase Two's invisible framework.

  "Aahz!" I shouted again. "Are you all right? Answer me!"

  My heart battered against the inside of my chest. Had the worst happened? Had he gone up to wait for a client and collapsed without anyone noticing?

  He lay on his back at the apex of the four ramps, one arm outstretched, his hand curled around a circular object. He was lying too still. I took to the air and flew the rest of the way.

  "Aahz!"

  I zipped through the top of the framework and into the air until I was hovering over his face. His eyes were open. "Aahz!"

  The eyes rolled in my direction and focused on me. "What? Can't a guy get any peace around here?"

  My heart slowed a little, and I lit on the next step down from his. He had a clear pitcher beside him the size of a barrel half-filled with a pale golden liquid. I wasn't naive enough to think it was lemonade. A chased goblet that would have made a good bucket sat empty beside it. That had been the object in his hand.

  "Are you okay?" I asked. "Everybody's been wondering where you are."

  Aahz sat up and sighed.

  "I just needed to get away by myself for a while," he said. "These last few days have been kind of tough on the ego." "I can understand that," I said.

  Aahz poured himself a drink. He offered me the goblet. I shook my head, and he took a hefty gulp.

  "You sounded like you were in a panic when you came flitting up here," he said. "Something the matter?" He aimed a talon at my nose. "Don't try to hedge. I've been watching you and the others tiptoe around me for weeks. What's on your mind?"

  "Nothing!"

  "Skeeve, you're a lousy liar.
What's going on?"

  No use in hedging, as he said, though there wasn't a shrub in sight. "We've been worried about you."

  "What about me? I'm not the one who got lost in the sand for three days and hitched a ride home with Shrouds-R-Us."

  I shrugged. "We've been kind of worried about your health."

  "Why? I'm eating and drinking. Everything else is functioning just fine, thanks. What makes you think I'm not well?"

  "Well. . . it's just. . . you've been nice to people lately."

  "I'm always nice to people!" he roared. "What are you talking about?"

  I smiled. That sounded like the old Aahz.

  "It's not just that," I acknowledged. "We were concerned as to why you wanted to be involved in Samwise's project so badly. I saw your face when he started describing the pyramid stones, the carving, the mourners and everything. We've turned down working on jobs like this in the past. It's nothing special. It's construction. But you've taken this very personally. After finding out Samwise is responsible for bringing the curse on himself and everybody involved, we would have walked away from a situation like this in the past, but you've hung on. Why?"

  Aahz threw himself on his back again and looked up at the sky.

  "Legacy."

  "Legacy?" I echoed, feeling panic rising again. "Then, there is something wrong with you? I'm your best friend. Will you tell me what it is?"

  "There's nothing wrong with me!" he shouted. "I don't have to be at death's door to wonder what people are going to think about me when I'm gone. By then, it's too late. I'm not as young as I used to be. When Samwise sat down in our office and let loose with his sales spiel is when I really started thinking about it.

  "I tend to live with an eye on the future, but it's not my primary focus. But, you know, as time goes by, you start to think about things. What have I ever done that anyone will remember me for? My kids don't talk to me. I've spent a lot of time kicking around, but what have I really accomplished? What's my mark on the future? Where is it? What did Aahzmandius ever do to earn a footnote in history?"