by Caitlin Sara
“You can say that again,” she said calmly.
“The problem is, I can’t help you if you ignore my phone calls. It is common sense you see, if you refuse to talk to me, there’s not much I can do. I see it a lot with clients, denial, people don’t want to admit they have found themselves in a situation that requires legal representation, but the fact of the matter is, there could be charges, and those charges are serious, my dear. If I don’t have a solid background on the case, it is only going to hurt us both in the long run.”
The last thing Ara needed was another lecture. So what, she ignored a few voicemails.
Arabelle cut through her train of thought, “Well, Barry, that is one of the reasons why I hired you. You have a knack for being even-keeled even with the most difficult clients like my daughter. You are phenomenal at your job, and now she’s here, so let’s move past this. Ara is innocent, difficult,” Ara scoffed before Arabelle continued, “but she is innocent and willing to work with you however necessary moving forward. So, let’s get back to what we are paying you for.”
“You pay me to defend her, to keep her out of jail, if necessary. You also pay me to protect her in the shit storm justice system that is swallowing her whole. Neither of which I can do if I have no contact. But I digress.” He leaned forward and clasped his hands together. “So, Ara, let’s start with the pregnancy. Based on communications I’ve had with their team, Congressman Bugia is pretty upset they weren’t made aware of their coming grandchild. The comments have not been particularly kind to you, but not condemnatory either. I don’t think it is helping your image by staying silent on this issue, especially when they are in the media vocalizing the need for a resolution to Brad’s case.”
Well, that would explain why they stopped talking to me, Ara thought, silently cursing her in-laws for further complicating her distressing situation.
“Are you saying she should go on the news, share her side?” Arabelle asked, again interrupting before Ara could get a word in.
“It could make her appear more sympathetic.”
“I need to go on TV to appeal for sympathy?” This time Ara laughed out loud. “I find myself wishing more and more that I never even met Brad, if this was going to be our ending, what the hell was the point? I would have been better off never to have known him at all than to be thrown into this.”
Barry tipped his head slightly. “Well my dear, unfortunately hindsight is 20/20, I suppose, and you could never have known this was going to happen. People only know what has been told to them and a lot of that has been what has come out after his murder. You can tell them what they don’t know. What your life was like before.”
Ara nodded, heeding the warning. “It’s been a domino effect. I’ve learned a lot of things about him and lost faith in what I thought we had,” she said, tucking each side of her loose hair behind her ears before continuing, “You can tell why I have been avoiding sharing my story to the media and the world.”
“I am sure it doesn’t help that people have a lot to say about your situation.”
“No,” Ara said, “it certainly doesn’t. People are judgmental assholes.”
Barry puffed an overemphasized exhale. “Well, you tell me what you want to do.”
“I guess if the Bugias are out there villainizing me then I may need to change the tone, and I guess I would need your help with that. I feel I haven’t been properly represented.” Barry jerked to defend himself but Ara cut him off. “I don’t mean by you, of course, properly represented in the media.”
With Ara requesting privacy from the very beginning, the media had only been left with tidbits of information from secondary sources. While there was something to be said for hibernating during a time of grief, there was also great risk in allowing the public to form their own opinions of her. She now understood the media needed to see the tears soaking her face, her joining the desperate cries for justice. The public needed to feel involved with her pain—and, of course, deem it believable.
“Brad was no altar boy. I always knew that, but since his death I have learned incredibly sordid details of exactly who he was. He cheated, abandoned me during moments of need, put his personal interests and pleasures over our child-to-be, and forced me into many repulsive situations. He wasn’t the type many would want to spend their life with, if you catch my drift.”
Arabelle couldn’t sit back any longer. “Those are all extremely difficult things to deal with, Ara, but I’m not sure smearing his family’s good name is the best strategy here. It can make you come off as bitter, hostile even. Someone who could have been looking for revenge.”
“I am bitter. I’m confined to tabloid hell because of him.” She could feel her cheeks beginning to heat, and she tied her hair into a top knot high on her head as she took an exasperating breath. “But that’s not what I want to show the world at all, and that’s not what I’m suggesting.”
Arabelle and Barry eyed her with piqued interest. “I am going to say that I knew everything. Was accepting of his flaws, happy to be moving forward with him as my partner and that he was committed to the same. I don’t want people thinking that I was blindsided by all this, I want them to believe that I forgave him and that we decided to move past the cheating and the lying and live a happy life together.”
Contemplating the strategy, Barry said, “It’s a difficult thing to do, Ara. It’s hard to appear genuine with a relentless reporter pouncing on you like a rabid animal. They come for blood and ratings.”
“I was a good wife.”
Exhaling he said, “Fine, I’ll make some calls, see who wants the interview.”
Ara turned to her mother. “Happy now?”
But her mother looked anything but happy with her. “Am I the only person here who thinks she won’t do well on air by herself? Up until this morning, she’s been hiding off in bed with Brad’s best friend. They’re going to eat her alive!”
Barry rolled his eyes, bringing both hands to his brow. “Of course she has been.”
Ara hated how her mother always found a way to make her feel like the smallest person in the room. She should have known she wouldn’t allow this meeting to end without publically shaming her for her sex life.
“Then we send someone on with her. Create a buffer, so to speak.” Barry moved his attention to her. “And not your new boyfriend.”
The three sat in strained silence, considering the options.
“What about your stepdaughter, Raina, she was on once before, wasn’t she?”
Ara peered down her nose at Barry. Raina didn’t help her the first time. Then again, did she need her to help her this time? What if there was a way she could use Raina to her benefit. Discreetly expose her for all the world to see? It wouldn’t be easy, but she could do it. Raina doesn’t know that she knows about her affair with Brad and exposing her on television would be like a sucker punch to the gut.
“I think that would be a great idea,” Ara said, cutting into the conversation.
“I thought you two weren’t speaking?”
Feeling suddenly optimistic, Ara smiled at her mother. “You wanted us to make up, didn’t you? I’ll talk to her and apologize for ruining her birthday brunch. I think I’ll feel more comfortable with family there.”
Arabelle, delighted by the decision, returned the smile. “OK then, that’s settled. Barry, you can make the arrangements?”
“Certainly. I’ll make some calls, see who wants the interview.”
Ara stood, extending her hand as if she’d just made a gentleman’s deal with the devil. With a firm shake to Barry, she smiled knowing he had no idea what she was planning.
“I will text you when I hear back,” Barry said, shaking her hand. “If you are OK with that form of contact, of course. Phone calls don’t seem to be your thing.”
“That works for me.”
Now all she had to do was stomach up an apology to Raina.
CHAPTER 30
Raina wasn’t expecting anyone at her apart
ment so when Ara knocked, she couldn’t think who it could be. What should have been relief to see a familiar face standing on the other side of the door instead created a volatile wrenching in her stomach. She was beginning to understand what it meant when people referred to others as ‘unraveling.’ At first she’d been surprised at how easy it was to keep up with the lies she’d been spinning over the past few years, but recently her instincts were starting to go wrong.
To Raina’s dismay, Ara looked beautiful as always, even with the recent stress. Despite looking slightly more put together than previous months, Raina could tell she was nervous by the way she was fumbling with her phone, attempting to look preoccupied. Ara always used her phone as a protective armor when she was left alone. Poor thing was too insecure to sit alone for five minutes. Raina often tried to show up for their planned meetings first, for that reason. Unless she was angry with her. Then she would let her sit and wait in her own discomfort.
“Come in.” The two ended up in the living area on the same couch Ara had spent so many weeks after Brad’s death. She settled in her favorite corner with Raina adjacent to her, both curling their feet up underneath them.
“I wanted to come by and say I’m sorry about brunch the other day. I know you love your birthday, and I shouldn’t have caused an issue like that.” Raina knew she wasn’t an easy person to apologize to, usually expecting people to flat out embarrass themselves before she accepted. “Everything’s been so messed up, and I really need you right now. I’m not expecting you to understand, I hardly understand myself anymore. I just wanted you to know that I didn’t mean what I said.”
“We barely even seem like we’re friends let alone sisters these days. Friends call each other, see each other, at least pretend they are interested in each other’s lives. I only hear from you if you need me for something.”
Ara shifted her position on the couch. “I know, and it’s my fault. I’m closing people off. I don’t know why exactly, everything changed for me when Brad died. It ripped my guts out and, honestly, I don’t know how the hell to deal with it.” For a second, Raina thought Ara might cry, but her stepsister put her big girl pants on, it seemed. “But that’s not your fault, and I need to start working through this shit on my own, not drag down everyone with me.”
Arabelle must’ve spoke to her, Raina thought.
Surprisingly, the thought of Ara caving to Arabelle’s demands lifted Raina’s face into a smile. When she first saw Ara, she was sure she’d make her grovel, but watching her take the blame was enough. “I have been a good sister to you.”
“Yes, you have been.”
“There is no handbook for this. You’re not the only one to blame for our fight. I’ve thought a lot about it recently, and maybe I haven’t been doing everything I could to help you through this. It’s just uncharted territory for me.”
“You’re not a doctor, nor should it be your problem to help me move on from something as traumatic as this.”
“True. I guess all I can do is distract you from everything.”
Despite barely making C’s in college, Raina was a gifted debater and could probably persuade a person to jump off a bridge while convincing them it was their idea to do so. Without a doubt, Raina would not end this conversation with her step-sister until the blame was on Ara and her alone.
“And that’s exactly what you have been trying to do, Raina. I am sorry.”
Raina stood and walked to the small kitchen in the rear right corner of the apartment. “Want anything?”
“Sure, whatever you’re having.” She returned moments later and handed Ara a large glass of tomato juice mixed with vodka. Both girls took large sips before placing the glasses down on the table.
“I met someone, you know. Think it could be going somewhere,” Raina confided, interested to see Ara’s reaction.
“Wow, that’s really awesome. They always say spring is the perfect time for a new relationship.”
“He’s a doctor.”
Ara laughed a little and pushed her nose up mockingly. “Well, look at you!” Both girls relaxed slightly, laughing at the prospect of Raina becoming an Upper East Side doctor’s arm candy.
“You’ll have to meet him if things ever get to that point. I don’t want to push it, but he’s practically perfect. I’m still in the grace period to determine if he’s a psychopath, but so far so good. You know, taking it slow. There has to be some reason he’s still on the market.”
“I’m sure he was just focused on his career. How did you meet him?”
“Actually it was after our brunch. I tripped while walking. He helped me up while others just stood there laughing at me. Kind of romantic, actually, we spent the rest of the night at his place. Getting to know each other.”
“How very Sex and The City.” Ara threw a nearby pillow Raina’s way. “Well, Samantha Jones, hopefully you landed yourself an Upper East Side Prince Charming.”
“One could only hope!”
After a brief pause, Ara jumped up, talking over her shoulder as she walked back to the bathroom. “I’m happy for you, girl.”
Soon after Ara closed the bathroom door, her phone buzzed, flashing the caller Lady Dr.
Picking up the phone, Raina entered Ara’s password and took a brief peek through the call list before opening the contacts. Danielle was noticeably no longer listed. Quickly clicking out of the contacts and back to recent calls, she selected missed and then Lady Dr. Maybe she was overthinking things, but she didn’t remember this listed in Ara’s phone the last time she snuck a look. They shared a gynecologist and Dr. Merrick was saved as precisely just that.
She dialed the number and a male voice answered almost immediately, obviously in some sort of distress.
“I am so happy you finally called.”
“Yes,” Raina said just above a whisper. “I don’t have much time but I wanted to return your call.” She did not want to give the caller too much information and decided it best to be vague, hoping this person would play along.
The other end went silent for a moment or two before the man answered with a hint of suspicion in his tone. “Ara?”
“Yes, this is she.”
“I have to jump off the line. Please call the office to reschedule your appointment.” The line went dead at less than one minute of clocked call time. Feeling more doubtful than ever, Raina was interrupted by the sound of the bathroom door opening. Quickly, she replaced the phone on the coffee table.
Ara returned moments later without seeming to notice the snooping that had taken place.
“Let’s get out for a little bit.” Raina stood, “How about a walk?”
Ara nodded as the two walked out of the apartment. Satisfied, Raina felt she got everything she needed from Ara’s apology for today.
CHAPTER 31
Dr. Dan nervously patrolled his office as Harley consoled him to no avail.
“She knows what she is doing to me!” he yelled, tossing a few meaningless items from his desk. Harley, seeming startled by his anger, scurried about trying desperately to return the office to normal. He never acted like this in front of her, normally fearful it would rock her own fragile mental stability.
“Is there anything I can do for you? Anything at all?”
“Yes, Harley,” he spit. “You can stop trying to crawl up my ass and make yourself useful in my reception area as I hired you to do!” He could tell his rage was penetrating her pores with its ugliness as she fought back tears, turned, and headed to the door.
Dan called after her, “Hold it together, Harley, I don’t need you being an emotional wreck in front of my patients.”
She slammed the door behind her. Dr. Dan knew as angry as she was with him, she would forgive him quickly enough. By late afternoon, in the lapse of his scheduled appointments, she would be bent over his desk, skirt up as he took her from behind.
She thrived off of his attention and would do anything for him. Harley loved him. He was aware that like many before, she hoped
he was falling in love with her, too. Ultimately, he would disappoint her like he had the others. After his twisted relationship with Ara, he was never able to fully commit to anyone. It was impossible to build an emotional connection with someone in the present without letting go of the past. Over the years, he preferred watching Ara from afar to going through the motions with someone else. His obsession grew gradually, at first he’d dial her number after too many cocktails, just to hear her voice. But when that wasn’t enough he had to find another way to get his fix. Occasionally he was ashamed of his behavior, fearful that someone might catch on to him. But neither Brad nor Ara ever noticed, and he was able to follow along with her in life. Watching her move on effortlessly stung. Did she ever love him?
With Brad out of the picture, he could finally see her again. If only she knew what he had for her, she would have shown up to their meeting. He had to convince her. If he could do that, he could get what he wanted. To see her, in person, alone, just him and her. Make her see that she could want him again. He knew he could convince her if given the chance.
CHAPTER 32
“Why do I have to go?” It was the first time Lane saw a childish side to Ara’s normally polished composure.
“Because that is what people do in situations like this. They talk to someone, work through shit. It’s pretty standard, Ar, something horrific happens, you see a shrink to help you deal with it.”
Ara coiled her hair into a loose knot on the top of her head. Her tank top, which was anything but form-fitting, hung from her frame, revealing the slightest dip at the side of her breasts. Lane loved her like this, casual and dressed down. To him, it was when she looked the most beautiful. Ever since she met with her lawyer, it was like a weight had been lifted from her and she was finally able to exist more freely. Whatever the lawyer told her, it must have been good. Lane was over the conversations about Brad and his double-crossing ways.
