Forever Alexa (Book Four In The Bodyguards Of L.A. County Series)

by Beauman, Cate

“I had to chuck that damn football more times than I should’ve. That game was rigged.”

  She folded Livy’s shorts next. “You probably paid double for him what we would have if we’d bought him at the store.”

  “You wanted him. I wasn’t leaving until you had this pathetic looking thing.”

  A small smile ghosted across her mouth as she looked up and realized he was smiling too. She swallowed as a rush of longing snuck through her defenses. She’d never been able to resist Jack’s smile. “Livy has always loved him. She’s slept with him since day one.”

  He held her gaze as he continued to toy with Gordon’s foot. “Why didn’t you tell me?” All traces of the happy memory vanished as his eyes sobered and his voice radiated with pain.

  “Because I never wanted her to think, for even one second, she was someone else’s burden.”

  “Goddamn,” he whispered and stood to brace his hands on the window frame. “I’ve missed so much. I’ve lost so much time.”

  Alexa got to her feet and walked to him, hesitating before touching his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Jack. I thought I was doing the right thing for both of you. For all of us.”

  He faced her. “I didn’t get a say. I’m so fucking pissed. I’m so sad. I want to hate you for this, Alex.”

  She stepped closer to the agony radiating in his eyes, even though it would’ve been easier to step away. “Do you think the past four years have been easy? Do you think I didn’t want a typical family for Olivia and myself? You walked out on me. Out of nowhere you changed everything. Was I supposed to have tracked you down three weeks after you told me you didn’t want me anymore and that I didn’t fit in your life and tell you we were expecting a child?”

  He pressed his hand to his forehead. “I don’t know.”

  “Well, I didn’t either. All I knew was you were gone and I had a baby to raise. After the initial shock wore off, I was thrilled. I’ve never regretted her for a second. Not one. She’s brought nothing but joy to my life.”

  “She’s so perfect, so articulate.” He looked at Olivia again and smiled. “She’s amazing. I’m still shocked she’s mine.”

  “She’s very bright. She’s so much like you, Jack. There’s rarely a day she doesn’t make me laugh.”

  The room grew silent as they both stared at the child they’d made.

  “Did you finish school?”

  “Yes. After you… After everything, I had a hard time. I struggled to keep up with my classes and student teaching. Luckily my professors were very kind. I thought I was tired from stress, but I soon found out I was pregnant. Olivia gave me a reason to keep going, even when I didn’t want to.”

  “Alex.” He trailed a finger down a wisp of her hair.

  She stepped away from his familiar gesture. The emotions swirling through the room were too strong. She couldn’t afford to make any more mistakes. “Everything worked out. I finished school and went home and took a job at the local elementary school—first grade. Gran helped me with Livy. So did Abby. They were my rocks.”

  “How? How did it happen? You were on birth control.”

  “I was. Remember that nasty sinus infection I’d had? The doctor thought the pregnancy could have been a result of the antibiotics she prescribed me. They don’t always mix well. We should’ve been more careful.”

  “What are we going to do? I want to know her. I need to.”

  “I—”

  The phone rang on his hip. Jackson scanned the readout. “It’s the detective. I’ll be right back.” He stepped from the room and walked down the hall as he answered.

  She glanced at her watch. Three thirty. Half an hour and the ransom was due. The day had rushed by in a whirl, but she was no closer to a solution for Abby. There were no new answers, nor was there a quarter of a million dollars in her account for the kidnappers. She’d been so wrapped up in her own problems; she hadn’t concentrated on her sister’s.

  Alexa sank to the bed and stood again, restless. Maybe she could convince the kidnappers to extend the deadline. They could have the money she had in her savings now—a drop in the bucket compared to what they demanded—but they could considered it a down payment to buy her a little more time and let Jack work with the police to figure this out. If the FBI was able get a trace on the phone, they might be able to save Abby before it was too late. She had to believe they would find a solution. But what if they didn’t?

  At wits end, she moved to the window, staring out at the rocky canyons in the distance. So much was up in the air right now; so many problems hurdled her way all at once; too much lay on the line. She couldn’t keep up. Despair and helplessness stewed together until she thought she might explode. She glanced down at her watch, staring as the seconds ticked by. Jack stepped back in the room, and she whirled. “So?”

  “So far they’re running with dead ends. They’ve seen the same MO with a couple of cases over the last several months. They have a vice team tracking down leads. They think they’re close. That’s all Detective Canon will share right now.”

  “They aren’t telling you anymore than they told me, which is a whole lot of nothing. I’m sick of hearing their PR crap. I want to know what they know about my sister.” She swiped her hair back and sighed as she stared at the ceiling.

  He stepped closer and touched her arm. “We’re all hoping they’ll call again so we can get a trace. That’s our best option right now. Detective Canon said Agent Marway will be here within minutes to set up the equipment.”

  “What if it doesn’t work?”

  “Let’s see if it does. I put in a few calls to Pittsburg and talked to Dougie Masterson, my old roommate. This is a Maryland case, but information gets passed from precinct to precinct. He’s going to keep his ears open. We just have to wait and be patient. They need a little more time.”

  She flung her watch up to his face. “We’re almost out of time, and my sister’s still out there somewhere. I have no idea where she is. I don’t know what they’re doing to her. Is she hungry? Is she hurt? Is she—is she alive?” She pressed her hands to her face as her voice broke, unable to bear it.

  “Come here.” He pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her.

  Alexa stiffened, hesitating, before she gave in and rested her head on his solid shoulder. She closed her eyes as Jack settled his chin against her hair. How many times had they stood like this? How many times over the years had she yearned for him to hold her just like this?

  “I know this is hard, Alex. I can’t even imagine. They’re doing everything they can.”

  She relaxed a fraction and returned his embrace, absorbing his warmth and strength. “I let her down. I’ve failed her in so many ways. She’s so young. She has her whole life ahead of her. I left her, Jack. I got on a plane and left her when she needed me most.”

  He tilted her chin up. “You left to protect Olivia. She wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. Olivia’s safe here. So are you. Abby loves you as much as you love her. She would understand.”

  Her eyes filled, and she struggled to blink away her tears, but not before one escaped. “I need her back, Jack. I need her home.”

  “I know.” He ran his fingers through her hair, and her eyes fluttered closed. Here was comfort. Here was everything she’d been without. “Jack,” she whispered as she clutched at his hips, absorbing all that he offered. “I’m so afraid.”

  The pads of his fingers skimmed her jaw, her temple, leaving her skin hot wherever he touched. “You don’t have to be. I’m right here.”

  “I thought you might like—” Evelyn froze in the doorway.

  Alexa’s eyes flew open, and Jack yanked himself away.

  “I’m sorry.” Evelyn walked off with her tray of lemonade and finger sandwiches.

  “Ev.” Jack hurried after her. “Ev, wait.”

/>   Evelyn shut herself in the master bedroom just as the doorbell rang. Alexa could hear Jack swear as he went to answer the door.

  Alexa sat on the porch swing, staring into the dark. Crickets sang as she rocked the glossy wooden bench back and forth, her nerves stretching ever tighter. It had been hours since her deadline passed, so why hadn’t the kidnappers called? She’d dreaded the creepy mechanical voice over the last two days, but now she prayed she would hear it again.

  She picked up the flip phone Agent Marway had fitted with a portable monitoring device and stared at the blue bars, relieved that the battery had been given a full charge. Agent Marway reassured her—several times—that the FBI would be able to trace any incoming calls at the Bureau and would follow up on new leads immediately. She just had to remember to do her part—wait for the cell to ring three times before she answered and keep the kidnapper on the line for as long as possible.

  She was ready—more than ready—to do what she could; they just had to call. Sighing, she set the phone back in her lap and tried to find comfort in the warmth of the night and the stars shining bright and beautiful above. Jack’s neighborhood was quiet, and the mountains lit up by the city in the distance soothing. She glanced to the window, looking into the room where Olivia slept. She could see her daughter’s tiny form cast in shadows from the bathroom light she’d left on. Alexa stopped swinging when Jack, clad in black gym shorts and a white t-shirt, stepped in the room. His tough, athletic frame hovered over their daughter. He sat on the edge of the bed.

  She studied Jack as he picked up Livy’s hand and held it in his. He was in love with his little girl. The adoration had been unmistakable after he’d moved past the shock. He wanted to know his daughter; he deserved to. And Olivia deserved to know him. If she could take the time back and tell him from the beginning... She shook away the regret. They could only start now, but ‘now’ had its own complications.

  Leaning against the swing, she played back the scene from earlier this afternoon. She’d been foolish to let Jack touch her again; she’d been stupid to forget that being in his arms could only bring pain. One moment of weakness had caused so many problems. Evelyn had stayed in the master suite since she dashed away with her tray of refreshments. Jack shut himself in the bedroom seconds after Agent Marway left. As Alexa made her escape to the fresh air, she could hear Evelyn’s quiet crying echoing through the door.

  Sighing, Alexa closed her eyes in a moment of surrender and drifted as she tried to figure out what to do next. A hotel room would probably be better—something close… The phone rang in her lap, startling her. Alexa jumped and scooped it up, staring at the unknown name, unknown number that popped up every time the kidnappers called. She struggled to keep her breathing steady as she hovered her finger over the talk button, waiting for the next ring, then the next. That was three. “Hello?”

  “Sister Alexa, where’s the money?”

  She stood and began pacing back and forth frantically as the nerves she’d struggled to keep at bay flooded her instantly. “I’m still working on securing the funds. You can have what’s in my account now.”

  Mechanical laughter filled her ear. “Do you think I’m playing games?”

  “No, no, I—”

  “Say goodbye to your sister.”

  “Lex?”

  Alexa froze as her sister’s voice trembled with fear. “Abby.”

  “Oh, God, Lex. I love you. I love you.”

  Before she could respond, Abby’s terrified screams echoed through the phone, and then there was silence. “Abby? Abby?”

  “We’re coming for your daughter next.” The line went dead.

  “Abby!” Alexa no longer held the phone to her ear as she shouted her piercing wails into the receiver. “Abby!”

  Jack rushed out the door. “Alex, what is it?”

  Fighting for her breath over her helpless terror, she ran toward the latch on the gate. The wild, overwhelming horror consuming her body forced her to flee.

  “Alex.” Jack grabbed her arm and yanked her around. “Alex.”

  She clawed to get away. “They killed her. They killed her while I listened.”

  He gripped her close as she collapsed to the ground in hysterical tears.

  “Come here. Come here,” he murmured against her hair as he held her, rocking her in his lap.

  “She’s dead, Jack. Abby’s dead.” She pressed her face to his chest, letting her torrid emotions run free.

  “Hold on to me. Hold on to me, Alex.”

  She did, clutching, trembling, sobbing, listening to Jack’s comforting murmurs close to her ear. His hand ran up and down her back in soothing strokes until eventually he picked her up. She had no idea how long they sat in the grass while she cried as she never had before. Minutes? Hours? At some point, her tears dried, and she found herself resting her cheek against Jack’s solid shoulder and staring at the tall wood planks of the fence. Somewhere along the way, disbelief had replaced her horror. Nothing seemed real as she drifted in and out of the present.

  Abby couldn’t be dead. She was only twenty-two. She had job interviews to get to, a life to build. This was all some sort of horrid mistake. Was Jack really holding her? Had she finally cracked? Her mind whirled between Jack, Abby, and Olivia.

  “Olivia,” she said listlessly as he carried her down the hall to her room. “They’re coming for Olivia.”

  “She’s safe, Alex. They can’t touch her here. I won’t let them. We won’t let them.” He set her on the bed and crouched next to her. “Where are your pajamas?”

  What did he say? Why couldn’t she keep up?

  “Where are your pajamas, Alex?”

  “My pajamas? I—I don’t know.”

  “Okay.”

  He walked to a drawer, opened it, and came back with one of his t-shirts. “Put this on.”

  She stared at the white cotton, paralyzed.

  “Come on, Alex.” He tugged her to standing. “You need to close your eyes and get some rest.”

  “Is Abby dead? Is she really gone? She kept screaming and screaming. Then she stopped.” Grief threatened to come back and swallow her as tears rushed down her cheeks, unstoppable. “I told Gran I would take care of her. I promised her I would.” She shuddered, her breath ragged.

  “This isn’t your fault.” He wiped tears away with his thumbs. “None of this is your fault.”

  “I didn’t save her. I didn’t save, Abby.”

  “Let’s get you into bed.” He unbuttoned the top button of her fitted blouse as she stared at him. “Come on, Alex. Help me out here.”

  “I can’t sleep. I don’t want to sleep. She screamed. She was terrified.”

  He undid the next button, then the next, his warm skin skimming hers as he tugged her shirt away. He yanked up the white t-shirt and pulled it over her head. “Take off your pants.”

  She glanced down and fiddled with the snap in the dark shadows of the room, her fingers shaking. “I—I can’t get it.”

  He heaved out a sigh, then pushed her hands away, unfastened the snap, and tugged on the zipper. Her slacks pooled on the floor, and he stared into her eyes. “Get into bed.”

  “Okay.” She took a step, looked at Livy, then stopped as she heard her sister’s screams again. “I’m so afraid for Livy, Jack. I’m so afraid. I don’t know what I’ll do if they take her away.”

  Jack stepped up behind her and pulled her side of the covers back. “Look at me.”

  She turned.

  “No one’s taking our daughter, Alex.” He skimmed his hands down her arms. “No one’s taking her away. Trust me. Let me handle this. Let me take care of you both for awhile.”

  She’d taken care of Livy, of herself, of Abby and Gran for so long. “I don’t know how.”

  “Take the first st
ep. Get into bed and rest.”

  She nodded and lay down on her side, pulling Olivia close. “Don’t turn off the bathroom light, ‘kay?”

  “Okay.” He stretched out next to her, leaning his back against the pillows, and crossed his ankles. “I’ll sit with you for awhile.”

  “Thank you.” The warmth of his body seeped through her borrowed cotton shirt as she snuggled her little girl, listening to her steady breathing. There was no comfort in holding her baby close, only the stark terror that she was next. How would they take her? Would they pull her into the back of a van like they did Abby? Were they watching Jack’s house right now? “Are the doors locked?”

  “Yes.”

  “Maybe I should go check.” The thought of walking through the dark was more than she could stand, but losing Livy was worse. “What about the windows?”

  “I have a security system and a gun.” He took her hand and she clutched it “My house is safe. You and Olivia are exactly where you’re supposed to be. Try to get some rest.”

  She closed her eyes, still holding on to Jack, certain she would never sleep again.

  Chapter 7

  Jackson opened his tired eyes and looked down. He wasn’t dreaming. Alex and Olivia were really lying in the guest bed next to him. He stared at his beautiful little girl, asleep, wrapped in her mother’s arms, and smiled. They’d just met, but he loved her. She was so bright and amazing. He was still in awe that he and Alex had made her.

  His smile faded as his gaze wandered to the woman who’d walked back into his life and turned his world upside down. Her beauty was still a sucker punch to the gut. Even in sleep, snuggled up in his simple white cotton gym shirt, she took his breath away. He’d tried like hell to remain unaffected throughout the afternoon but failed miserably. Alex was as potent now as the day he laid eyes on her in the college library. She’d knocked him flat—plain and simple. Four years apart hadn’t changed a damn thing.