Adopted Parents

by Candy Halliday

  But wasn’t that what he’d been doing so far? Still Hallie wasn’t satisfied.

  She’d said she was disappointed in him. Well, his disappointment in her was double. If she really wanted to discuss the selfish issue, Hallie needed to start with a good look at herself.

  Nate walked to the kitchen, grabbed a beer and stomped back across the great room. When he flopped down on the sofa, Nate drained half of the bottle in one angry gulp.

  What a fool he’d been.

  He’d let his guard down and ignored the one thing he’d always known to be true. Life never let you keep the things you wanted most.

  What Nate wanted most was Hallie and Ahn. And he had a good chance of losing them both.

  Nate took another long swig from the bottle, already deciding he was not going to the main house for dinner in an hour. Nate got up from the sofa and walked to the intercom.

  He hoped Hallie would answer. Hoped she would hear in his voice just how disgusted he was with her, too.

  Nate got Roberta instead.

  “I’m really not hungry tonight,” Nate told her. “So don’t worry about dinner for me.”

  “I guess that means Ahn and I will be eating alone tonight,” Roberta said. “Hallie just came downstairs and told me the same thing.”

  Nate grimaced at the loud click.

  So Hallie had no interest in seeing him tonight, either. Fine. He needed a break from her, too.

  Nate walked to the refrigerator for another beer. But as he slumped on the sofa again, he could already hear the haunting whistle of a fast-moving train.

  Maybe he should lie down on the track this time and finally get the train wreck over with.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  HALLIE WAS GLAD the second interview was scheduled for ten o’clock on Wednesday morning. She desperately needed to talk to Nate—privately—so she couldn’t wait to leave Wedge Pond that morning. Hopefully she could straighten things out between them.

  Her blissful night of having no one to worry about hadn’t gone so well. She’d awakened more than once during the night to check the monitor that wasn’t there because Roberta had it with her in the guest room. When she’d reached for Nate and he wasn’t there, the miserable feeling in the pit of her stomach made her sick. That was when Hallie realized she couldn’t make it through another day with them being so angry with each other.

  Nate was in the kitchen having coffee with Roberta when Hallie came downstairs. Ahn was eating her cereal and Hallie could hear Gladys in the laundry room already starting up the washing machine.

  “Good morning, everyone,” Hallie said cheerfully and walked over to kiss the top of Ahn’s head.

  Ahn didn’t acknowledge her at all.

  Nate barely mumbled, “Good morning.”

  And Roberta said, “You’d better get going if you’re going to be on time.”

  Hallie couldn’t have agreed more with that suggestion.

  Nate slid off the stool, then kissed Ahn. She looked up and smiled at him. Hallie was surprised when Nate looked over at her next.

  “Ready?”

  Nate even waited for her to collect her purse before they headed for the door together. His actions gave Hallie hope he was tired of fighting, too.

  “We’ll be back as soon as possible,” Hallie called over her shoulder to Roberta.

  “Good luck with the interview.”

  They hadn’t even made it to the Range Rover when Nate said, “I want to apologize for yesterday.”

  “So do I.”

  They climbed in and Nate put the car in gear, then backed down the driveway.

  “I don’t blame you for being confused, Hallie. We were both in agreement with the readoption in the be ginning. And I know your opinion hasn’t changed. But right now I’m having serious doubts.”

  “What can I do to help you put those doubts aside?”

  “A little understanding, maybe?”

  “Understanding goes both ways, Nate. You act as if I’m tossing Ahn aside, and you know that isn’t true. I told you from the beginning that I want to be a part of Ahn’s life. I’ll always feel the need to be able to check on her.”

  “And I guess that’s where I’m having my doubts,” he said. “I’m not sure I could ever trust anyone else to take care of Ahn. Even if I do have the right to check on her.”

  “But what if we could find a couple who you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that you could trust? Would you still feel the same way?”

  He glanced over at her again. “That would be a completely different story, Hallie, and you know it.”

  “Then all I’m asking is for you to walk into these interviews with an open mind, Nate. Maybe you’re right. Maybe we’ll never find a couple we trust. But maybe I’m right, and we will. At any rate, we both owe it to Ahn to try. That’s all I’m asking.”

  “Okay. I’ll walk into this interview with an open mind.”

  “Thank you.” She waited for a few seconds before asking, “And us? Are we good now?”

  “We’ve been better.”

  Not much of an answer but Hallie would take it for now.

  She reached into her purse and pulled out the e-mail Greg’s assistant had sent her on couple number two—Harvey and Gwendolyn Brown. “I only glanced at the information Greg sent us on this morning’s couple, and I know you haven’t had a chance to look at it. Would you like me to give you a rundown the way Greg did for us yesterday?”

  “My mind is wide-open,” he said with very little enthusiasm.

  Hallie ignored his cynicism. “The Browns own a property rental company, as well as owning all of the rental properties they manage. She’s older, thirty-eight. He’s thirty-two. They’ve been married seven years, and this is the first marriage for both of them.”

  Hallie paused, reading over the information. “It appears Gwendolyn is the more active of the two when it comes to community involvement. There’s a long list of organizations she belongs to, and she’s the chairperson on several different committees.”

  “So when would she find time for Ahn?”

  “That’s a question we can ask her.”

  “That’s a question you can ask her,” Nate said. “I told you yesterday I would let you handle this interview.”

  “What happened to your mind being wide-open?”

  His expression was serious when he looked over at Hallie. “I’ll keep an open mind. You’ve already convinced me I need to do that.”

  NATE’S MIND MIGHT HAVE been wide-open, but Hallie’s mind snapped shut almost from the second they walked into the boardroom. The Browns were the most mismatched-looking couple Hallie could imagine.

  The first word that crossed Hallie’s mind for Gwendolyn was Amazonian. She had a commanding presence, her dark hair pulled back in dreadlocks, and her hard, chiseled features were representative of a warrior who might consider eating her children if it was necessary for her own survival. Husband Harvey barely came to Gwendolyn’s shoulder. And Hallie couldn’t help but notice the man bore a striking resemblance to Pee-wee Herman.

  Hallie didn’t have an opportunity to say a word after Greg made the introductions. The minute Gwendolyn sat she pulled out a list. She ignored both men and focused solely on Hallie.

  “Does the child sleep through the night?”

  “For the most part, yes,” Hallie said. “Ahn sleeps through the night.”

  “Is she potty trained?”

  “No,” Hallie said. “But we’re working on that.”

  Gwendolyn immediately looked over at Harvey, who obediently scribbled something on the notepad in front of him.

  “Does the child have any food allergies?”

  “No,” Hallie said. And again she stressed, “Ahn doesn’t have any food allergies.”

  “Is she allergic to pets?” Gwendolyn asked. “Because it’s only fair to tell you that we have three dogs and four cats that will stay part of our family. That isn’t negotiable on our part.”

  “And it’s only fair to t
ell you that I have no idea if Ahn is allergic to pets. We have no dogs or cats.”

  Gwendolyn looked over at Harvey. He made his notation on the pad again.

  “Are the child’s immunizations up to date?”

  Hallie was over it. “Her name is Ahn. And yes, all of Ahn’s immunizations are up to date.” Hallie’s curtness didn’t even faze Gwendolyn.

  “The adoption agency noted delayed developmental issues. Is that a nice way of saying she’s mentally retarded?”

  Hallie’s head jerked toward Nate sitting beside her. Now was the time for him to be rude and obnoxious.

  Nate just looked at her, an amused smile on his lips.

  Hallie faced Gwendolyn. “You know, now that I think about it, the reason my sister and brother-in-law didn’t have pets is because Ahn does have a severe allergy to pet dander. Sorry, but the dogs and cats will have to go. And that isn’t negotiable on our part.”

  Gwendolyn stood and Harvey snapped to attention with her.

  “This interview is over,” Gwendolyn announced.

  She glared at Hallie and gave Pee-wee Harvey a hard push toward the door.

  Hallie waited until the Browns had cleared the threshold before she turned to Nate. “Don’t you say a word. I mean it. I’m too upset right now.”

  Wisely, he didn’t.

  He waited until they reached the SUV. “Maybe we should keep an open mind about what happened and schedule a second interview so we can introduce Ahn to the Browns.”

  “Not funny.”

  “None of this is funny, Hallie. None of it. Especially not what this is doing to us.”

  They were in each other’s arms so fast neither of them cared that they were standing in the middle of a public parking deck. The next thing Hallie knew, Nate had her pushed up against the car and her hands were tangled in Nate’s hair as his mouth came down on hers in an urgently violent kiss. His hands gripped her hips, pulling her against him so she could feel how much he wanted her.

  “Get a room already,” someone yelled out from several cars away.

  They instantly pushed away from each other.

  Nate grinned. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

  IT WAS WELL PAST two in the afternoon before Hallie walked up the steps to the deck. Roberta sat at the patio table, thumbing through a magazine, the baby monitor in front of her on the table indicating Ahn was still down for her nap. Roberta purposely looked at her watch, then back at Hallie.

  “That must have been some interview.”

  Hallie blushed. “Don’t start with me.”

  “I just have four words to say on the subject,” Roberta said when Hallie took a seat beside her. “I told you so. And don’t think for one minute I’ve been fooled about what’s going on. I’m the one who arranged for the charity to pick up Janet’s and David’s clothes the day you went to close up your apartment. So don’t try to tell me those are David’s clothes hanging in your closet. I saw your housekeeper put away Nate’s clothes in your room without question on Monday after she finished the laundry.”

  Hallie rolled her eyes.

  “But speaking of words,” Roberta said, changing the subject now that she’d thoroughly chastised Hallie, “I said the wrong word earlier when I was reading to Ahn. I called the pig in the story a piglet. And Ahn looked up at me and said, ‘Say pig.’”

  Hallie laughed.

  “There’s nothing wrong with that child’s mind, Hallie. She has a stubborn streak, just like you.”

  “Me?” Hallie echoed.

  “Shall I count the ways?”

  “No. I’m sure you’d manage to work Nate in there somewhere, and that’s a situation Nate and I still have to figure out for ourselves.”

  “And the interview?”

  Hallie groaned just thinking about it. “It was a disaster. The wife was the most obnoxious woman I’ve ever met, and the husband was so browbeaten I actually felt sorry for him.”

  “I thought the adoption agency was screening these people for you.”

  Hallie sighed. “Their qualifications looked great on paper. But that’s why a personal interview is necessary.”

  “Don’t look so disheartened. You still have tomorrow’s interview. It’s at ten o’clock in the morning, too, isn’t it?” Hallie nodded.

  “But if you’re going to be late tomorrow—”

  “I promise,” Hallie cut in. “We’ll be back on time.”

  “See that you do,” Roberta said. “The Colonel and I have dinner plans tomorrow night. He’s taking me to a new restaurant and we’ve waited weeks to get a reservation.”

  Roberta didn’t have to worry about them being late.

  Hallie had her own plans for tomorrow night.

  All night—with Nate back in her bed.

  AFTER NATE DROPPED Hallie at the house, he left for his weekly visit with his mother. It had ceased to matter that she had no idea who he was, or that she seldom acknowledged he was there. Nate knew he was there. And today he had a lot on his mind.

  Wanda had been right when she’d told him the visits were as much for the family members as the patients. Being able to tell his mother anything was better than any therapy session money could buy.

  She was, after all, his mother.

  He should be able to tell her anything.

  When Nate reached her room, he was relieved to see she was sitting up again today. He’d bought a bird feeder and placed it outside her window. She seemed to be watching the bright yellow finches sitting on the perches pecking at the seeds. At least, Nate liked to think she was enjoying watching the birds at her window.

  “Hi, Mom,” he said, kissing the top of her head.

  She looked at him briefly, then back at the feeder.

  Nate positioned a chair next to her wheelchair and took hold of her hand. The routine had become so comfortable for him he saw no reason to change it.

  He started the usual one-sided dialogue he exchanged with his mother, but he suddenly paused. Was that why he was having doubts about going through with the readoption? Had his daily routine become so comfortable for him that he saw no reason to change it?

  “I’m confused, Mom. All those years I took care of you and David I told myself that when David grew up and when you got better, I’d never take care of anyone else again.

  “I felt so cheated, Mom. I didn’t have the freedom other kids my age had. Sports were out of the question even though I was a damn good first baseman. And forget dating. You don’t ask a girl for a date and expect her to hang out at your house while you cook dinner and help your little brother with his homework. Did you know I was a virgin until I was twenty?

  “It was the summer I won the Kodak amateur spot news photojournalism award. David was away at church camp. And Uncle John agreed to stay with you for the weekend while I went to New York for the award ceremony.

  “I got a little drunk for the first time at the awards’ banquet. And it gave me the courage to hit on this brunette sitting at the same table. She was older than I was, maybe twenty-four or twenty-five. She definitely took pity on me in more ways than one.

  “But, you know, taking care of David’s daughter has been a different experience for me. I’ve enjoyed it, spending time with her. I don’t know if it’s because I’m older. Or if having my freedom for so long has made it less important to me. Maybe I’ve enjoyed it so much because of how much I love Hallie.

  “I know you don’t remember Hallie, Mom. But you’ve met her. She came with David and Janet. She’s mentioned coming with me, but I’m not ready for that yet. I think you and I need a little more alone time before I start bringing visitors.

  “But you would like her. She’s smart and funny, and she’s so beautiful it’s hard for me to breathe sometimes when I look at her. But I guess what I like best about her is that she tells me exactly what she thinks. Like with the readoption. Hallie doesn’t have any doubts it’s in Ahn’s best interest to find her new parents.

  “The funny thing is that I felt exact
ly the same way at first. It was crystal clear in my mind that the only right choice was to do what David and Janet asked us to do. For Ahn’s sake, I believed it was our duty to put her up for readoption.

  “But now, the thought of anyone other than Hallie and me raising her is like a knife right through my heart. I keep wondering what will Ahn think if I’m not there to comfort her when she’s crying. Or will she wonder what happened to pizza night on Fridays and feeding the ducks every day? And after her bath when it’s time for stories, will her new father take time to let her climb into his lap and hold on to his two fingers while he reads the same book not once, but twice?

  “This child has been through so much already. You can see it in her eyes when she looks at you. You can see her trying to decide if she should trust you or if you’re like everyone else who has disappeared on her. That’s why the thought of her being taken from the only real home she’s ever known and handed over to strangers seems unfathomable to me.

  “Hallie says we need to love her enough to find her good parents, so we can be who we’re supposed to be to her. Her aunt and her uncle. But I’m not sure I can do that, Mom. If we go through with the readoption, it may have to be a clean break for me. Worse than me not having any contact with Ahn, would be the chance that every time I looked into her eyes there would always be that big question staring back at me. ‘Why did you give me away?’

  “So, what do you think, Mom? Should I be selfish and keep Ahn regardless of what Hallie wants and regardless of what’s really best for Ahn? Or should I do what David asked me to do and find the best parents for his daughter?”

  Nate wasn’t expecting an answer. It was talking things out that helped.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  HALLIE AND NATE had both vetoed the third couple they’d interviewed several weeks ago. The wife had been so shy she barely said hello. The stockbroker husband had excused himself every few minutes to take an important call from one of his clients. His actions told them exactly how important Ahn would be to him if he couldn’t even stay off the phone long enough for the interview.