Fighting Our Forever (Panthera Security Series Book 3)

by Elisa Leigh

  My heart is beating double time in my chest and the only thing I

  need to know slips right out of my mouth. “When did you know?”

  His next words are going to break my heart no matter what they are, but they will also determine where we go from here.

  “A few hours ago. Callie, baby I-”

  “What’s his name?” I ask.

  Ryan breathes out a huge sigh and walks into the living room,

  sitting down on the couch. “His name is Rush.”

  I sit beside him, staring at this beautiful baby boy who can’t be much more than six months old. He’s got the same dark hair like his daddy, and I bet when he opens his eyes, they’ll be the same shade of blue. “He’s beautiful Ryan.”

  “He’s mine.” He says, searching my face.

  This is it, I have to decide. Am I in or am I out? Do I want to help raise another woman’s child?

  I grab his hand that’s resting on his thigh and squeeze. “I know.”

  “Baby I want to tell you everything, but I don’t want to do it in front of Rush, and I’d only like to tell the story once. Would you mind if we waited for Paul to get home?”

  “You haven’t told him yet?” I ask, surprised his best friend didn’t know.

  “It’s not exactly the kind of thing you send in a text or say over the phone Cal.” He says laughing.

  He’s right about that. My mind races with how our lives will change now. Where is this little guy going to sleep? “Oh, we need to go shopping!” I say excitedly, thinking about how I want to decorate his room.

  “What do we need to go shopping for?” Paul asks, walking into the living room. I watch Paul who is eyeing the sleeping baby. “Whose kid is that?”

  “He’s my son.”

  Paul’s eyes get big, and he rubs the back of his neck staring down at Rush. I can’t figure out what he’s thinking, and his silence is driving me crazy. Losing my patience, I kick him in the shin.

  “Ow, damn woman, what was that for?”

  “Say something already. What are you thinking?”

  “I was processing!” He glares, rubbing his shin. He sits on the coffee table across from us, and when it creaks beneath his weight, I can’t help but giggle.

  “I’m thinking there’s a kid in our home who looks exactly like my best friend. I’m thinking about how you might be taking this Precious, but then also wondering if my best friend is doing okay because that’s a big fucking surprise.”

  “Best friend is also processing,” Ryan adds, and we all start laughing.

  I guess we laugh too loud because a minute later Rush sits up looking around at the three of us with wide eyes. He must be terrified to be in a place he doesn’t know with people who are strangers. His bottom lip begins to quiver, and an alligator tear rolls down his cheek. I don’t think twice before pulling Rush into my arms and rocking him, telling him it’s going to be okay. He settles after a few moments into my chest and falls back to sleep soon after.

  “Do you have any diapers, clothes, anything?” I ask, wondering if we have enough for tonight.

  “She gave me everything. It’s all in the back seat of my truck.”

  “How long is he staying?”

  “Forever,” Ryan says, standing up. “You got him, baby?”

  “Of course, I do. You guys get his stuff in the house. I want all of it put in our room.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” They say in unison before heading out the door.

  Forever? Did his momma give him up? I know what it was like growing up without my mom. I’m not going to let little Rush go through that. I’ll be the best damn momma for him.

  ∞∞∞

  Hours later after we gave Rush a bath and put him to sleep in his pack in play we have set up next to our bed, we’re back in the living room getting the lowdown on what happened earlier.

  “She just gave him up? Just signed her rights away like it was nothing?” I ask, shocked that a mother could do this.

  “Brenna was always a selfish bitch Precious,” Paul says while reading through the paperwork in the file Brenna gave to Ryan.

  “Then what the hell were you doing… Nope, no I’m not going there. That was a long time ago.”

  “Giving Rush up might be the only selfless act she’s ever done, and even that’s questionable,” Ryan adds.

  “Baby put down those clothes and come here.”

  Dropping the onesie I have in my hand, I crawl up to Ryan and snuggle into his chest. I love how warm he is and how safe I feel wrapped up in his arms.

  “Now that you two have had some time to let it all sink in, we need to figure this out. Rush is mine, gonna be in my life forever. I know you didn’t sign up to be instant parents so I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to walk.”

  “Shut up. That baby is mine, I’ve claimed him. I’ll be like the momma cat who raises a duck. He might not be blood, but he’s still mine.”

  “Paul?”

  “Precious said it right. He’s ours, what more is there to say?”

  Chapter Twenty

  Paul

  I’ve been lying awake for the last hour while Calliope and Ryan sleep restlessly, tossing and turning. While I mean everything I said, Rush is ours, I’m still in fucking shock. Who the fuck keeps the birth of a child a secret from the father? First thing in the morning I’m going to have our lawyer look at the paperwork and make sure everything is legit and then I’m going to make sure that Calliope and I are granted guardianship over the child as well. I’m going to make damn sure that the bitch that is Ryan’s ex has no way of taking this child away from us. I could see it in her face, my kind-hearted love is completely attached and gone all momma bear on the kid.

  I always planned on being a father, but I thought we had some time to get used to the idea and figure some shit out before we had one of our own. I guess that isn’t happening and I need to get on board fast because there’s no stopping parenthood now.

  Rush begins to fuss, and I sit up about to get out of bed when I feel Calliope stir beside me. When her eyes open, I lean down and kiss her softly. “I got it, love, go back to sleep.” She closes her eyes and snuggles up to Ryan.

  Getting out of bed I grab Rush from his pack and play and realize immediately what the problem is. I grab his blanket and walk downstairs to the living room where his diaper bag is. “It’s okay little man. Papa Paul is going to make it all better.” I tell him as I lay him down on the couch, one hand on his belly, and grab a diaper and wipes from the bag.

  I make quick work of changing his diaper, but he’s still fussing. I walk to the kitchen and make him a bottle quickly. Thank God Calliope made the bottles already and showed me how much water to add. I think I’d be lost if it weren’t for her instructions. Bottle made, I sit down in the recliner to feed him, and he knows exactly what to do. Rush is fucking adorable making grunting noises while he eats. I move my hand away from the bottle because he seems like he’s got it, as soon as I go to move, he grabs my hand and puts it back, holding his hand over mine while we hold the bottle together. I end up putting on one of my favorite shows, Doomsday Preppers.

  Once Rush has finished his bottle and burps, I end up rocking him for a little bit until he settles down enough to go back to sleep. I grab a blanket and pull it over us as Rush falls asleep on my shoulder, his little fist clenching his blankie. We fall asleep together, and my last thought is that I won’t ever let that bitch Brenna take my son from me.

  ∞∞∞

  I wake up immediately when I feel Rush being pulled off my chest. I grab the arm of the man grabbing Rush, ready to kill whoever dared to take my son. I finally release it when I realize it’s Ryan. “I got him, man. Why don’t you go crawl back in bed with our woman?” Ryan says.

  I stand up and walk over to where Ryan has just sat with a sleeping Rush in his arms. I sit beside him on the couch, staring down at this little man who just transformed our world. “I know I said this yesterday, but just so you know, Rush is a part of ou
r family, he’s my son now too. I will do anything to keep him safe.”

  Ryan claps me on the shoulder, and nothing else needs to be said. I have been by this man’s side for the better part of fifteen years, and I’ll stay by his side, protecting our family.

  I’m about to walk to bed when a sleepy Callie walks downstairs and walks over to us, climbing into my lap and cuddling up. We all stare at this baby until he peaks his eyes open and yawns the biggest yawn he’s probably ever had. He sits up and stares at all three of us looking back and forth and then around the room.

  When he looks back, he holds out his arms to Callie who sits there stunned.

  “You want momma little man?” Ryan asks, and Rush starts to whine leaning toward Calliope with his arms up.

  Our woman reaches for him and holds him close, rocking him in her arms. “I got you, baby, momma’s here.” She tells him, and he smiles against her shoulder staring at us.

  “There’s so much we need to get done today. We need to buy him a crib, and bedding. He’s going to need clothes and a high chair. Of course, we need to get toys, and he’s going to need-”

  “We’ve got it baby, one thing at a time. How about you get ready and then we’ll get started with this list you’ve got growing in that beautiful brain of yours.” Ryan soothes her.

  “Come on my sweet boy, let’s go get ready while your daddies sit here and talk about man stuff.” She gets up from my lap and carries Rush with her up the stairs.

  When she’s moving around in the bedroom, I turn to Ryan. “Is Brenna going to do anything stupid and try to take him back?”

  Ryan stands and walks into the kitchen, starting a pot of coffee. “Ryan?” I ask again.

  “How the fuck do I know man? She just told me yesterday that I had a kid I knew nothing about. As far as I can tell she wants nothing to do with Rush and if the paperwork is legitimate than she won’t have custody of him for much longer.”

  I slam my fists on the counter, pissed about the unknown. I’m not used to this, I’m always in control of my world. “This is fucking bullshit!”

  “I hear ya’ man, but at least we’ve got him now. The only thing we can do is talk to our lawyer and do whatever needs to be done to make sure he’s ours and stays ours.”

  “That’s a good idea man, I already planned on calling him this morning to see if he can see us this afternoon. I don’t want to take any chances when it comes to Rush.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Callie

  “Come here you little stinker,” I tell Rush, dragging him across the floor by one of his chubby ankles, him giggling the whole time. Pulling him in front of me I tickle his belly making him giggle louder. God, I love this little boy. He’s the best thing to come into my life, maybe even better than his daddies. He rolls over and crawls away from me, looking back every few seconds to see if I’m crawling after him. We’ve been in the living room playing and listening to something on the baby channel. I have no idea what it is, but he loves watching all the colors and listening to it, so we keep it on when we’re home relaxing in the house.

  Ryan and Paul walk into the room backpacks slung over their backs and dressed for their weekend playing in the woods. I eye them up and down, immediately turned on by their tight t-shirts, cargo pants, and combat boots. Fuck, my men are looking good.

  I stand up and grab Rush from the ground where he stopped crawling and sat up staring at me, worried I’d leave the room. He’s got his bottom lip sticking out and on the verge of tears. Rush has been with us for over a month, and he still gets upset whenever I leave the room, worried I won’t come back. It makes my heart hurt for him and the months he lived with that monster that gave birth to him.

  “I’m not going anywhere little man, momma is right here,” I say holding him tight and giving him lots of kisses.

  “I still don’t like leaving you two alone for the weekend. One of us should stay home with you. I can go on the next trip, and Ryan can stay that weekend.”

  I roll my eyes and hug Paul to me after Ryan grabs Rush out of my arms. “We’ll be fine. Plus, we won’t be alone. Maci-Kate is coming over with Layla and Bennett in a couple of hours, and we’re having a sleepover. Then tomorrow dad is coming into town and hanging out with Rush and I. Trust me, we won’t be alone for long this weekend, we’ll be very busy.”

  Paul kisses the top of my head and lifts me in his arms, where I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, our eyes level. “I love you, Precious. You, Rush and Ryan are my whole world. If anything happened to any of you, it’d fuck me up. I’ll always worry.”

  “I love you too Paul. So much has changed in the last couple of months. I never expected to be where we are today, but I’ll never stop fighting to keep you three boys.” I smile when he places kisses all over my face and finally my lips. Letting me go, he helps me slide down his front.

  “Come here chunky monkey.” I take Rush from Ryan and hug his side. “I love you Ry. You two stay safe out there.”

  “Oh, don’t worry about us baby. We’ll be fine.” He tells me, then kisses my forehead and my lips. When he goes to deepen it, I push him away knowing what will happen if I let it continue.

  “Uh uh, the last time that happened you were an hour late to work. Has to suck working a second job, huh?”

  “Hush, lazy bones. You are taking care of Rush now that summer is here.” He laughs and walks to the door behind Paul.

  “Tell your daddies bye. Say bye-bye daddies.”

  “Dah-Dee, Dah-Dee” Rush babbles out, and my eyes fly to Ryan and Paul’s.

  “Did he just say daddy?” Paul asks rushing over and grabbing our son in his arms, Ryan right beside him.

  “Say it again Rush, say daddy.”

  Rush looks at them both like he’s trying to solve a puzzle, or maybe he’s pooping because he looks real serious when he does that too. “Dah, Dah. Dah, Dah, eeee.” He says, and they both cheer making Rush laugh. Paul kisses his head and passes him to Ryan who hugs him tight and kisses his chubby cheeks. “That’s right little man, we’re your daddies. We love you Rush, now go see your momma. Take care of her while we’re gone this weekend.”

  I walk up to him and take Rush who immediately snuggles into my side, lying his head on my shoulder. Giving them pecks on the lips I usher them out the door, so they’ll leave. The sooner they go, the sooner it is I have them back in my arms.

  I walk into the kitchen and place Rush in his highchair and give him a couple toys to play with while I do the dishes. I’m just finishing up when my cell goes off. “Hey girl, I was just about to start making some snacks for today. We can’t wait to see you.”

  “Hey Callie. We’re not going to be able to make it. Bennett started throwing up a couple of hours ago, and I think Layla has it too. I’d hate to get you and Rush sick.”

  “Oh no! I hope they feel better. Is there anything you need me to do? I can go pick up some things if you need me to, I know the guys have been gone for a while now.”

  “I think I’m set here, but we’ll need to reschedule soon, Bennett was looking forward to spending the night at “auntie Cal’s” house.” She says laughing.

  “He’s so freaking cute Maci. You’re going to be in trouble when he grows up. You tell him auntie Cal will invite him over as soon as he’s feeling better.”

  “Thanks girl. Sorry again.”

  “No big thing, go take care of your babies. I’ll check on you tomorrow.” I hang up and look over at Rush who’s beating a plastic hammer on his tray. “Guess it’s just you and me tonight baby boy.”

  He bangs his hammer on his tray and starts babbling like he’s trying to tell me something. I nod and talk back to him telling him about what we’ll be doing when my dad gets here tomorrow.

  A few hours later Rush is taking a nap in his room, and I’m in the middle of reading Sarah O’Rourke’s new one, Until Sunrise. This Luka is one demanding man, that’s okay though, he makes up for it with the way he loves Michelle. I’m
at the part where Michelle is showing Luka some awful shack when I hear a car door slam shut. I put my Kindle down on the coffee table, frustrated that someone is interrupting me while reading. I never get to read when the guys are around because, just like Luka, they can be demanding assholes.

  We don’t get a lot of visitors out here unless it’s someone we expect or a delivery. The guys built their house on five acres, and the nearest neighbors are ten minutes away by car. I walk to the door and look out the peephole to see a tall blonde in a short skirt and fuck me heels. She’s dressed to the nines wearing what I’m assuming are designer clothes. I wouldn’t know, I’ve never kept up with all of that. Curiosity getting the better of me I answer the door, wondering what she wants.

  She looks me up and down and sneers at me. “Are you the nanny?”

  The hairs on the back of my neck rise and do my best to stop myself from going off on this bitch. Who the hell does she think she is?

  “No.” I deadpan, crossing my arms over my chest, waiting for her to continue.

  “Hmm, I figured Paul had better taste than you, whatever. Is Ryan here?”

  “I’m sorry, who are you?”

  She laughs and pushes past me. “I saw his truck out front I’ll just go find him. He’s probably in his room anyway.”

  Closing the door, I’m in shock at the audacity of this woman. I follow her as she walks through the house like she’s been here a hundred times and it all clicks into place. This is Brenna, Rush’s mother?

  “Brenna stop, Ryan isn’t home.”

  She’s about to go upstairs where Rush is asleep in his crib, when she stops and looks at me, thank god. I want her as far away from him as possible.

  Brenna walks up to me as if she owns the place like she has every right to be here. Towering over me, she does her best to intimidate me, but I’ve faced scarier monsters than her. She’s just a bitch wearing shiny clothes. “Where the hell is he then? I need to talk to him about something important.”