Love’s Secret Baby

by Goode, Ella

“Seat belt.” He reaches over me before I can move to grab it, pulling it over me and clipping it into place.

  “Where are we?” I ask again. I don’t even know what state we’re in. His eyes lock with mine. My heart flutters, catching me off-guard. His eyes search my face, looking for something. An answer maybe? I don’t have those.

  “Home,” he says again, putting his hand on my thigh in a possessive hold as the SUV pulls out of the empty airport.

  Chapter 9

  Jonas

  I want to interrogate her, get an hour-by-hour report of exactly what happened since the accident. It seems like she’s surprised—not just that I’ve found her but my actual existence. Her eyes nearly fell out of her head when I mentioned I had the pink lemonade she liked stocked on the plane.

  “How did you find the Wards?” I ask as the SUV rolls down the highway toward Darby’s luxurious prison.

  “I needed a job.”

  My fingers clench around her thigh. “What was it about the life you had with me that made you decide that working at a horse farm owned by strangers was better for you?”

  She rubs her lips together, the pink appearing and disappearing in a way that shouldn’t be erotic but is. My hand nearly clamps against her pussy in an automatic reflex. Back before she left me, if she’d done that, I would have had her under me with her skirt up and my cock inside of her within five seconds flat. I pull my hand off her thigh and lace my fingers together so I don’t do something dumb. I want her to give me a reason to overlook this. I don’t want to be mad. I have a son. This is a time I should be celebrating, but underlying my newfound joy at seeing Darby alive and discovering I have a son is the ugly reminder that she’s been hiding from me for almost three years. I can forgive it, though, if she’s honest with me.

  “I had an accident and when I woke up, I didn’t remember anything.”

  I hang my head in disappointment. “Amnesia? You’re going to claim amnesia as the excuse for running away and hiding my son? We’re not in a soap opera, Darby. You had my five-carat diamond ring on your finger. That meant something.”

  Her fingers fly to her empty ring finger. “I...I never had any ring. My purse had a driver’s license and forty dollars. I had a credit card with no purchase history and a bank account that was overdrawn. I guess the hospital staff or the emergency crews must have taken it.”

  She’s convincing but she should’ve picked anything else but a made-up illness. If she was frightened of having a baby or she hated the Willits’ life, that would have been understandable. I hate the Willits’ life and being pregnant for the first time would probably scare the shit out of me, but faking some kind of memory loss?

  “That’s easy enough to check out.”

  “You don’t believe me.” It’s a statement, not a question, and for some reason, I’m starting to feel bad. Like should I believe her?

  “Did you know you were pregnant when you left me?”

  “I don’t remember.”

  I have a feeling all of my questions are going to result in that kind of answer.

  “Where were you?”

  My head pops up at her accusatory tone. “Where was I what?”

  “Where were you when I got hurt? Why didn’t I see you at the hospital? If I was so important to you, if you wanted a baby with me so badly, why was I in a car alone with your child in my tummy?”

  A pang of something like guilt tickles the back of my neck. I swat it away because I’m not the one who hid for nearly three years. “I was in Singapore when I got the news you were in an accident. Your car had stuck a tree and you were nowhere to be found. There was a cliff.” I swallow hard thinking about it. “It was thought you got out of the car disoriented and maybe fell over.” They never found a body. “How far along were you?” I change the subject not wanting to think about her dying on me. I lived that nightmare for three years.

  “I was eight weeks. I was transferred to a different hospital after I woke up and couldn’t remember anything. I stayed in the new hospital for two weeks. While they tried to help me remember. I have the bill to prove it. The Wards paid it off for me.”

  The guilt creeps back in. I fold my arms over my chest and pretend like all of this isn’t bothering the hell out of me. “The records will speak for themselves.”

  “Fine, but remember you promised me that you would not separate me from Jax. No matter what.” Her pretty lips are set in a tight, unhappy line.

  “I’m not the one who doesn’t keep their promises.”

  “If I had a five carat diamond, I would take it off and throw it in your stupid face.” She turns to face the window.

  That feeling of guilt grows. I never treated her like this before. My entire focus in life was to make sure she was happy, but I’m angry and hurt and frustrated. I don’t know when those feelings are going to go away—probably not until I’m inside of her again. My dick swells to uncomfortable proportions. I haven’t had sex in nearly three years. The last time I had my hands on her was the night before I left for Singapore. She made me shepherd's pie. I fucked her on the kitchen table after she put the leftovers in the refrigerator. I fucked her again in our bedroom with the lights on so I could see her gorgeous face full of lust. The encounter—our last one—is so clearly etched in my memory. She was on her back with her hair spread out like a fan. I was on my knees. I had her legs hooked over my shoulders and her ass in my hand. I ate her out first. I had her writhing, clawing at the mattress and when she was coming, I jacked my steel-hard shaft inside of her so hard I sent her skittering across the bed. The sheets pulled off the mattress; the pillows fell on the floor. When I came, it felt like I was unloading a gallon of cum into her hot pussy. We didn’t even have the energy to remake the bed. I dragged a comforter over us and we passed out. The next morning, I crept out of bed, showered and sped to the airport. We were negotiating a big shipping deal and I was out of contact for a day. When I came up for air, I got the call. She’d been in an accident. I left immediately and the deal cratered, but I didn’t care. I had to be back.

  But when I got home, we could never find her. And for nearly three years, it was like she’d never existed.

  Gran’s estate looms ahead. I hear a small swift inward gasp of breath as Darby takes in the large iron gates. I have three options: My penthouse, my sister's place, or the estate. The estate will be the least welcoming. Gran didn’t like Darby before and she’s not going to suddenly develop warm feelings when she learns that my former fiancée has kept my son a secret for two years. But Gran will not let Jax go, and until I’m sure that Darby doesn’t plan on running away again, the estate is my only choice.

  Chapter 10

  Darby

  I don’t want to be here, my mind screams as we pull up the long driveway toward the giant mansion ahead. I thought the Wards’ house was extravagant but this is a whole other level. Still my body tenses. The need to escape claws at me. Maybe I did run from here. If this is the place he calls home and my first instinct after seeing it is to get out then it’s possible that’s what I did in the past.

  I put my hand on Jax’s belly, reminding myself why I’m here. He sleeps soundly, not having a care in the world. That’s all that really matters. It looks as though Jonas doesn't know what happened to me either. I didn't think I’d be the type of person to take a child away from their father, but he is making it seem as though that’s exactly what I did.

  As much as I don’t want to believe it, I have to consider it a possibility. None of it makes sense to me, and my mind is still racing with the question as to why I would've done such a thing. What pushed me to leave? Yet, even with all of those questions unanswered, I know one thing for certain: that I will not let anyone take my son from me.

  “We’ll be staying here.” I nod my head in agreement because he’s not asking a question. I’d stay in hell if it meant being near Jax. I reach for Jonas’ wrist, lifting his hand off my thigh. If he thinks I’m lying, then he should keep his hands to himself.


  “I’m not going to run. I’ll never leave Jax.”

  “But you do like to run?” he throws back, making me dislike him even more. I push away the attraction I first had to him. The car rolls to a stop in front of the monstrosity that he calls a home. One that reminds me of just how much power the Willitses have. That thought leaves me unsettled, making it clear to me that I have no other choice but to play nice for now. To go along with what Jonas wants. But it doesn’t mean that I have to like it.

  I’ll ignore him. He can keep poking at me all he wants. It doesn't matter what he says to me, as long as my son remains mine. There’s no use going back and forth on the amnesia thing. It’s obvious he doesn’t believe me, so why waste my breath? It’s better for me to stay quiet. Soon he’ll grow bored and be on to the next thing, I’m sure. He didn’t look so torn up when he was on that yacht a few weeks ago, I remind myself. I’m reaching for anything at this point to kick any of that attraction I felt for him away.

  The car goes silent as he waits for me to answer. I can feel his eyes on me but I refuse to look his way. I am tired and he is playing with my head. How can he be so mean yet hold me as though he’s missed me on the plane ride here? I don’t understand him. I swallow when a lump forms in my throat. I will not cry. I’ve been so strong since I woke up in that bed alone and found out I was pregnant. I had to be. I won't crumble now. This man will not break me. Unless he already did and that’s how I got into this situation to begin with.

  He mumbles something under his breath that I don’t catch as he opens his car door. He steps out, allowing me to get a glimpse of the morning sun coming up. I don’t know how long I slept on the plane, but I still feel tired. He shuts the door before I can try and follow him out. He walks around to the other side to open the door to get Jax.

  I hit the seat belt button to free the car seat as Jonas pulls it from the car easily with one hand. He holds his other hand out to me, offering to help me out, but I ignore it. Instead, I grab the door myself, stepping out without his assistance. I practically raised a baby by myself, I can manage getting out of a car alone.

  “Are you going to be difficult?”

  I shake my head no. I am going to be invisible where he’s concerned. I am here for one reason and that is Jax. I have no idea what his father and I had at one time, but with how he’s talking to me, I’m guessing it wasn't the best. As he reminded me before, I’d run from here. There had to be a cause. All fingers are currently pointing to him at this moment.

  “Come.” He starts up the stairs, the front doors swinging open. A man in a butler suit stands there. His eyes go wide when he sees me. Then they shoot to the car seat that Jonas is holding and his mouth falls open. Clearly he recognizes me.

  “Mr. Willits, can I help you with anything?” the man asks.

  “I’m good, George. I’m taking Darby to the east wing.” Of course they have wings in this over-the-top house. I follow Jonas. As we pass George, I give the man a half smile.

  “How are you, Ms. Harris?”

  “Call me Darby, please.”

  George chuckles. “We’ve had this fight before. You know I can’t.” His eyes go soft on me. “I’m glad you’re back. Give her hell.” He winks at me before turning to shut the door.

  “This way.” Jonas cuts in before I can ask who I need to give hell to. I give Jonas another nod and follow after him. My eyes are so tired at this point that it’s hard to take the place in. Everything is breathtaking and beautiful. I’m going to have to put Jax in a bubble. This place is definitely not baby ready. If Jonas intends for us to stay here, he’ll have to make a lot of changes. Childproofing this place is only the beginning.

  “Here.” I look back to Jonas as he pushes open two white doors into a giant bedroom. I follow him in as he sets the car seat down. I drop to my knees in front of Jax, unbuckling him before I slowly pull him out. I bring him close, needing to feel him against me. I always feel calmer when he’s close.

  “Mommy,” he says in his sleep.

  “I’ve got you, angel.” I pull Jax tighter in my arms as I stand. This gets harder and harder every day. He’s going to be as big as his father from the looks of it. My eyes flick over to Jonas, who is pulling his buttoned-up shirt out from his slacks. He’s a wrinkled mess in his tux.

  I turn, heading over toward the giant bed to put Jax into the center of it. I don’t look back at Jonas as I crawl into the bed with Jax. It may be terrible, but I am using Jax as a shield. I don’t want to be alone with Jonas. I am still trying to get everything I am feeling under control.

  “Can we step out for a minute?”

  My body stiffens when I realize his voice is coming from right next to the bed. I open my eyes, sitting up. “No. I won’t leave Jax alone. He has no idea where we are. If he wakes up he might be scared.”

  Jonas runs a hand down his face. “Okay but we need to talk.”

  I shake my head no. “There is nothing to say. You wanted Jax here.” I look down at our son. “He’s here.”

  “About us.”

  “There is no us.”

  “Darby-”

  “Don’t,” I snap, cutting him off. I take a deep breath in to get myself under control so I don’t yell and wake Jax up. “You say I ran. Fine. Maybe I did. I don’t know what the truth is there. What I do know is that there had to be a reason that a person that’s so in love would run. They would have to have been scared or truly unhappy to take off without a trace. So you think that you have questions, well so do I. Beginning with why did I run from you, Jonas?” I turn my head to look back up at him. He looks shocked as he takes a step back as if I’d hit him. “You may not believe that I don’t remember you, but it doesn't matter. If I ran, I was running from something. If I’m going off the man I’ve met today, I’m starting to see why I would have.” I shake my head.

  “I never once thought I ran away from someone. It never even crossed my mind. I didn't know who I was when I woke up in that hospital room but I didn't think for one second that I ran from something. I wasn't scared someone was going to find me. I was scared that no one was looking.”

  “Darby-”

  I keep going, ignoring him. Realizing that I’m pretty terrible at this not talking to him thing. “No one did.” I turn away from him. “For years.” I lie back down next to Jax, putting my arm around him and closing my eyes, willing myself not to cry. “I’m tired. Please let me sleep before Jax wakes up soon,” I tell him, hoping that he leaves before I start crying. The room goes quiet. I don’t know if he stays or goes. I don’t hear anything as I drift off to sleep.

  Chapter 11

  Jonas

  A half hour later, Melody bursts through the door of my suite. “What is it? You made it sound like a huge emergency on the phone,” she says. Her hair’s a mess and it looks like she dressed in the dark.

  “Are you wearing a different tennis shoe on each foot?” I ask from my seat on the sofa.

  “Yes because you texted that I needed to get my ass over to the estate pronto and that if I didn’t something terrible might happen. So I got out of bed, grabbed the first thing I could find and drove over here only to find you sitting on your ass drinking what appears to be your fourth glass of scotch.”

  “It’s only my third.” I pat the cushion next to me. “Come sit by your baby brother.”

  Melody throws her coat onto a chair and trudges over. She’s not happy but since she loves me, she does as I ask.

  “You’re lucky you’re my only brother or I wouldn’t feel so indulgent.” She throws herself onto the cushion, grabs my drink and downs half of it. Her face curls up. “I hate that you drink your booze neat. Scotch is better with ice.”

  “Ice waters it down.”

  “Exactly. It needs to be watered down. It has about eighty years of sediment in it. But enough about that. I didn’t come all the way over here in the middle of the night to argue with you about liquor. What’s going on?”

  “Darby’s back.”

&
nbsp; Her jaw drops and it takes her a couple of seconds to compose herself. “Darby? As in your Darby? Oh, Jonas.” She puts her hand on my forehead as if I’m sick. “I thought you were starting to move on. That’s why I sent you up to the Wards, but instead of finding a new woman, you’re sitting in the dark dreaming about Darby. Honey, she’s not coming back. I miss her, too, but this isn’t good for you.”

  I nod my head toward the set of double doors leading into the bedroom. “Go and look for yourself. She’s really back. Be quiet, though. They’re sleeping.”

  “They’re?”

  “She has a son. My son.”

  “What?” The one word flies out of her mouth so loud and high, I fear she’s going to wake them. I clamp a hand across her face and hold a finger to my mouth.

  “They’re sleeping.”

  Wide-eyed, all she can do is blink at me for a while. Finally, she collects herself and walks over to the doors. She stops in front of them, takes a deep breath, and then slowly opens one door just wide enough to slip through. After a minute, she returns. Her face is creased with shock—eyes wide, eyebrows raised, mouth slack.

  She stumbles back to me and collapses against the cushions.

  “That’s Darby. I thought she was dead.”

  “Me too.” I gulp the rest of the liquor and pour myself another serving. Before I can take a sip, Melody steals my glass and downs half of it.

  “Sorry,” she says, pounding her chest with a fist.

  “I know. I feel like I’ve been kicked in the gut, too.”

  “What happened? Where has she been? Where did you find her?”

  “She was living over the Wards’ garage. I’m not sure what she was doing there or why she ran away. She says that she survived the accident but had amnesia. She hadn’t taken a fall off the cliff into the ocean like everyone presumed.”

  “Amnesia?” Melody whisper-shrieks, her voice full of the same disbelief that I’m feeling.