Broken Trouble (Broken Storm #1)

by Kristan Billups

  "Our goal is to keep her out of jail Starre, not make her look like she's already been in one," Polly scolded, causing Starre to slump in her seat.

  "I can't go with her and I can't dress her, you're leaving me with nothing here," Starre sighed. "I guess I'll just have to stick with moral support."

  Gavin pushed the plate of sausage that Mutt had been licking on earlier towards Starre, hiding a smirk when she took a few pieces from the plate.

  Grabbing the sausage from her plate, I put them back and shoved it away from us. Landon snatched up the plate, eating a piece as he put several more on his plate. For a minute, I wondered if he realized that Mutt had been licking on it, but he was the one to get him off the table, so he had to know.

  Dylan leaned over and whispered something to him, probably about the sausage.

  "I know," Landon said, cramming another sausage into his mouth and chewing it, moaning dramatically from the supposed wonderful taste.

  When we were done eating, it was just about time to go. It was a long drive to the courthouse and we had to get there with plenty of time to eat lunch before. With everything that was happening today, I didn't know that I would be hungry.

  I went to my room to grab my bag and took one last long look around. When I came here, this room had felt so foreign. Now it only felt homey, making me never want to leave, even though I knew I had to. I knew I would probably never see these bright yellow walls again. I made a mental note to have Polly give Starre any of the clothes she might want from the ones I had to leave behind. I’d packed light, which meant that I wasn't able to take all the clothes with me.

  I grabbed my bag and walked down the stairs and out the door, finding everyone huddled around the porch, waiting for me so they could say goodbye. They were passing my phone around, taking pictures, which confused me because I’d just had it in my back pocket this morning before breakfast.

  Unless, during Landon's fiasco, he'd taken it from me. It surprised me, because with his boy-next-door persona, he wouldn't be the kind of person that I thought could do something like that.

  I took a deep breath and stepped closer to them, wishing I could just get in the truck and leave without having to do goodbyes. Even though all I ever did was say goodbye, it didn't make it any easier.

  I'd managed to find a peaceful place inside of myself to hide away from all the emotions rolling around inside of me and I couldn't let myself be pulled from it.

  I wasn't going to cry, I couldn't cry.

  "Alright, say what you need to! We leave in five minutes," Gavin called out, then spun on his heel and headed to the truck.

  "Take all the time ya need Honey," Polly said, following Gavin to the truck. Chili made himself scarce, finding something to do around the feed shed.

  "Text me or call anytime, I will always be here for you no matter what the judge rules. Our friendship will last no matter how many miles are between us." Starre hugged me again, wiping tears from her eyes as she stepped away from me.

  I nodded and turned away quickly, not wanting her tears to bring any to my eyes.

  I ended up facing Landon, who was taking pictures of anything and everything. He walked forward and wrapped his arms around me. He hugged me so tight that he lifted me off the ground for a few short seconds before setting me back down. "You'll be back before you even have time to blink. Ah look, you're back already! Let's go eat again!" he said before releasing me, looking cheery as he tried to brighten the dampened mood.

  I felt arms encircle my waist from behind, Jayden's chin tucking into the crook of my neck before he started kissing me there. Jayden's mouth brushed across my ear seconds later as he murmured some of the lyrics from the Screaming Mercy song that we heard at the concert. "You're looking for something you've already found. I'm right here behind you, just turn around. There's no need to roam. I'll be your home."

  He hadn't been singing the words, but that didn't keep him from rocking his hips against me to an unheard beat.

  "Alright, enough! Dylan's turn," Landon said, pulling me from Jayden's arms and pushing me towards Dylan.

  Dylan opened his mouth to speak, looking nervous, but Gavin interrupted him from the truck. "What the fuck's taking so long?"

  "Shut up!" Landon screamed back, then said much lower, "He thinks the sun comes up just to hear him crow."

  "I downloaded some songs on your phone, if you want to listen to them," Dylan told me, handing me my phone. We both stood there, not knowing what to say or do, until he leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. I kissed him back, tears flowing down my cheeks. It was a kiss filled with sorrow and pain and I knew exactly what it was.

  A goodbye kiss.

  I broke away from the kiss and stepped back, struggling to keep the tears pooling in my eyes at bay. Heading to the truck, I was stopped by Wyatt, who stood waiting near the truck for me. He reached for my hand, tying a bracelet on my wrist. "So you can have a piece of him with you no matter what, just as he does," he explained softly, then tipped his hat up just enough to plant a soft kiss on my forehead. Wyatt took my bag from my hand and opened the door for me, putting the bag into the back of the truck

  Gavin started the truck and headed down the road, passing by Storm's field as we went. I watched Storm gallop after the truck, only stopping when he got to the end. I could see him in the rearview mirror, rearing and tossing his head, before whinnying after me. Wyatt's words rang through my mind as I ran my fingers across the bracelet on my wrist that I knew he had made from Storm's hair.

  The only reason Storm hadn't jumped the fencing was because he thought I was coming back. He was staying there, waiting for me, just as the guys were.

  ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

  *Starre - Good luck at court today! I thought maybe we could do a movie night with everyone when you come back. We can force the guys into watching romance movies. Maybe Jayden will learn something!

  Starre's text came in just as we were entering the courtroom, giving me a bit of encouragement through all of my doubt and sadness.

  I silenced the phone and took my seat, setting my packed bag behind me. I tried not to fidget, but that didn't stop me from doing it.

  When the judge entered the room, it felt just like every other time I’d been to court. I could feel myself falling into my old ways. I felt myself become distant to what was being said in the room, barely paying any attention as they listed all of my charges and talked about my past and about the fire.

  Gavin was sitting nearby, so I knew he could hear everything that was being said about me. He would probably hate me even more after this, knowing everything I had done and some of what I’ve been through.

  "Your Honor, people like her should be placed in prison, not let loose into this world. Just because she was supposedly doing well at that farm, doesn't mean that she's not pretending only to get out of jail time. Furthermore, I believe that the De la Cruz's are an unfit family to be housing a delinquent. They are obviously letting her do whatever she pleases, and by doing so are helping her play the system," Mrs. Dollghen said, brushing her hand over the front of her dress suit jacket. "I am one of the best parole officers in the state and I will not allow something like this to just slip by in court."

  For the first time since I'd met Polly, I saw that she was actually mad. Still, she held her tongue and let the judge speak instead.

  The judge sighed heavily, adjusting his glasses and rubbing his temple, "I will take your opinion into consideration. However, I have known Mrs. De la Cruz for many years. She already homes several delinquents without issues. What proof do you have that it's an unfit home?"

  Mrs. Dollghen huffed loudly, like she was insulted that the judge would doubt her. "I know people like them. They don't have the backbone or skill set to handle someone like her."

  Finally, Polly spoke, "I've come to this court many times in the past. After the boys came to live with us, we had almost no problems from it."

  "It's the almost part that worries me, Mrs. De la Cruz
," the bitch, I mean, Mrs. Dollghen, retorted.

  "Regardless of the appropriateness of Mrs. De la Cruz's home, I have already come to a decision. The defendant has completed her task of helping Mrs. De la Cruz and her family with rebuilding what she destroyed and in return they have chosen to withdraw their charges entirely. The barn was rebuilt to its entirety, with no issues surrounding it. So you're free to go." The judge straightened up slightly, raising his gavel and smacking it against the table as he made his judgement. "However, Nova, don't expect me to go easy on you next time. Keep your nose clean," he warned sternly, eyeing me.

  I nodded, feeling relief flood throughout my body. I wasn't going to jail!

  "I'd like to speak to Mrs. De la Cruz and Mrs. Dollghen in private for a few minutes regarding your living arrangements. Everyone else can take a recess. I will have someone let you know when to come back in," the judge informed us, motioning us to leave.

  "Yes, I'm very worried for Nova," Mrs. Dollghen said, changing her tactic from outrage to worry too fast for it to be real.

  I stood and exited the courtroom with Gavin, who was the only other person in the courtroom besides the judge, Polly and Mrs. Dollghen. It was just a small court, nothing too big. It made things simpler and I was glad there were no reporters this time.

  I waited in the hall, feeling anxious. Who knew why Mrs. Dollghen was going after Polly, though I doubt it was because she was worried about me.

  "Are you going back to the ranch?" Gavin asked, his muscles tight and eyes not meeting mine.

  "Do you want me to?" I asked, needing to hear the words from him. He was in reality, not blinded by the delusional dreams of who I could become. If the other guys ever saw who I had been or who I was, clearly they would react just like Gavin was now. His reaction would tell me if I wanted to go back and face the others. I needed to know if going back would hurt all of us more than just leaving would.

  "You've never cared what I thought before, so it doesn't matter now," Gavin ground out, his jaw clenching.

  "It matters to me; I want to hear you say it."

  "We don't get what we want."

  "Say it," I said softly, my voice breaking. I needed to hear him say it out loud. I needed to hear him say that he thought I had a chance of a life with them, that I wasn't as bad for them as I thought, that he wanted me to come back.

  Instead, his jaw clenched and his eyes hardened as he turned away from me completely. "You shouldn't have come to the ranch in the first place. Whatever the hell you have going on with the others is going to destroy them. I'll lose everything, they'll lose everything. It's best if you leave now and save us all the trouble."

  I was gutted, devastated, and crushed. What really broke me was that I wasn't enough for them. I couldn't go back to that life with them, I would only end up hurting them even more than I already had.

  I nodded, even though he had his back to me and couldn't see me holding back my tears. He was right, they all deserved better than me. I needed to go, they could still move on and find someone else who could give them everything I can't.

  I had feelings for them and they seemed to have feelings for me too, but it didn't matter what decision I made now. I was just going to complicate things and cause them all to break apart and turn on one another. It didn't matter which of the guys I chose; whether it was one, all or none, it could never work out. The only thing I could do was to make a clean break and get away from them before I caused even more damage.

  Polly opened to door and motioned us back into the courtroom. I had no time to emotionally recover or even to hide away and cry the tears that were building up inside me.

  "Everyone's here, so I'll go ahead and start. Mrs. Dollghen's concerns seem to be just that, so I see no reason that Nova can't go back to the De la Cruz's if that’s something that both parties want. She only has five months until she's of legal age, so I see no reason to go through an adoption process." The judge set his hands in front of him in a pyramid, his eyes watching me.

  "We would be thrilled if Nova would come back home with us," Polly spoke, seeming to relax now that she wasn't getting verbally attacked by Mrs. Dollghen.

  "Nova, what would you like to do?" The judge asked, causing everyone's eyes to turn to me.

  This was it, it was time to make a decision to stay or go. Gavin's words still rung loudly in my ears over and over again and I avoided looking at him, knowing he was waiting to hear my response.

  "You could stay at my house tonight if you need more time to make a decision," Mrs. Dollghen offered a little too cheerily for my liking, but at least it gave me the option, no the opportunity, not to go back to the ranch.

  "I'd like the stay with Mrs. Dollghen for the night before making a decision. I have a lot to think about," I said quietly, so quietly that if everyone else in the room hadn't been awaiting my response I'm sure they would have missed it.

  The judge eyed me as he gathered up his paperwork. "Very well, you have the night to decide. I expect you'll make the right decision, Nova."

  Chapter 29

  I stared blankly out the window, the scenery a blur, not because of how fast we were going, but because my eyes were as unfocused as my mind. It was easier to do this than it was to think about my actions and the decisions I made or had yet to make. If I let thoughts fill my head, I would only hear Gavin's words echoing through my head and Polly's sad eyes when she'd hugged me goodbye. Polly had tried her hardest to make it an option for me to stay at the ranch and I’d let her down by choosing a different option. This was the best option I had though, at least according to Gavin. This was the only way I could hurt them the least, even if it was the option that hurt me the most.

  There I was, thinking about things again, which only caused a stabbing pain in my heart.

  My phone vibrated in my pocket, making me wish that I’d turned my phone off instead of silencing it. Now it was too late. If I moved to turn it off, it would only attract the attention of Mrs. Dollghen in the driver’s seat.

  She had ranted on throughout most of the drive, making it easier for me to shut her out. Now that she had fallen silent, I was unwilling to move and disrupt it.

  A few minutes ticked by painfully slow, before the car turned into a gas station. "I'm going in, if you run then I'll call the police," Mrs. Dollghen warned as she got out of her car and walking off towards the gas station.

  My phone vibrated again, then again. She was gone now, so I could just turn it off so I wouldn't be able feel their texts coming through the phone. I could pick up my phone without reading them right?

  Grabbing the phone, I turned the screen on, seeing that I had four missed calls and nine texts.

  I don't know why clicked to look at the texts they had sent me today. Maybe I wanted to torture myself even more.

  *Starre - How did it go?

  *Starre - Answer if you're alive!

  *Landon - Jayden keeps stealing my food. U need to come back so u can help me make him behave.

  *Landon - Also wondering if u can graphitti over the posters in Jayden's room, it's getting ridiculous in there.

  *Jayden - I was thinking, we never got to roll in the hay. ;) I'm up for it when you come back.

  *Jayden - I can send you a picture to help you make up your mind...

  *Wyatt - I think Sweetheart will be giving birth tonight. You should be here to see it.

  There was another text from Wyatt, with a picture of Storm in his field at the edge of the fencing, looking off down the road that we took to leave.

  How long would Storm stay there without me? How long would it take before he got hit by a car or caught and sold at an auction to the highest bidder? I may be from the city, but I knew what happened to horses like Storm; they were either sold for meat or glue. Wyatt had promised that he would take care of him until I came back, but what would happen to him if never did? How long would Wyatt be able to keep a horse that wasn't of any use?

  I squeezed my eyes tight, remembering Wyatt telling me to f
ight for what I wanted. What was it that I really wanted?

  Didn't I want what everyone wanted? A place to call home and people to call my family, who would love me like no one else? Isn't that what I had at the ranch?

  But Gavin was right, if I stayed there, I would only rip them apart and destroy their happiness. With several of the boys having feelings for me, there was no way it could work out where I didn't cause their family to pull apart.

  Gavin had always been an ass to me, so how did I know that he was telling me the truth about what he thought? How did I know that he wasn't just playing my insecurities to get me to leave?

  The phone vibrated in my hand, jerking me from my thoughts. I clicked on it, pulling up the first text I’d received from Dylan.

  *Dylan - i'm writing another song. what rhymes with love of my life?

  Tears slid down my cheeks as I read his text, knowing that I was hurting Dylan more than anyone else. Who knew how long it would take him to move on from me. He was so shy and socially awkward that this would most likely cause him to withdraw from everyone. I hoped he would find a girl who was sweet and kind to him. I felt jealousy claw at my chest at the thought of him with someone else, but I pushed it aside. If I left for good, then I couldn't be jealous for any of the guys moving on.

  Where was this even coming from anyway? I thought I’d already made up my mind to leave, yet here came all of my emotions bubbling up, making my heart give its opinion.

  I had to use my brain on this, not my heart.

  I would never find anyone who cared for me like they did. I’ve already been looking for seventeen years and if no one else was going to love me at this point, then no one would.

  Except Dylan did.

  They all did.

  Still, Gavin knew them better than I, so I needed to go by what he had said. Didn't I?

  Mrs. Dollghen got back into the car and continued her drive, until she finally pulled up to a house and cut the engine. I barely even noticed, too lost in my own thoughts.