Log 1 Matter | Antimatter

by Selina Brown

  Caleb looked after her while Tara reorganized the ice-climb for two days’ time. Ara felt better by evening, but slept fitfully with Caleb watching over her that night. By the next day, she was sitting by the fire, reading. Caleb and Tara went out for a walk. That night Tara went out, daringly, she said, to a party at the resort club.

  Ara had to shower and carefully eased her body off the couch. She turned on the water and leaned on the tiles feeling hands on her waist. She didn’t even talk but turned, seeing his need was as strong as hers.

  “How are you feeling?” he whispered hotly in her ear.

  “Good enough for this.” She pressed into him.

  “It’s been some time, Baby.” He kissed the nape of her neck and over her shoulder. It wasn’t some kinky erogenous zone of hers but it was doing the trick.

  “Me too.” Ara ran her hands up his back, pressing him closer.

  They spent the evening playing, soothing minds and bodies. That night, after everything except 69 and actual sex, Caleb kissed her stomach. “I missed you so much.”

  She ran her hand through his red hair but he captured her hand, kissing it. “I missed you too.”

  He slid up and gazed down at her. “Twenty years for me. Not even with Meg.”

  Ara’s breath caught. “Me too on the twenty. But, Caleb, don’t worry about it so much. That’s unnatural for a FiG.”

  He jabbed her in the ribs. “I’m being serious here.” But his lips traced down to her naval and then up to her mouth. Kissing her. They both jumped with a big clap of thunder.

  “Damn, there go the ice fields.”

  But Caleb nudged her mind to where he wanted. He said roughly, “Forget that. Love me.”

  She wrapped her arms around him, running her fingers down his back. In the throes of their passion, their love, that had nothing to do with the three pleasures they connected at some level that reminded her of the Strike. Higher and higher they went. There were no acrobats or acts of contortion, just kissing and pressing their bodies together. Ara felt completely safe and erotic; Caleb’s mind surged with energy, somehow connecting to the Strike with her.

  At the end, still wrapped in each other’s arms, they fell asleep. Next thing Ara awoke to the sound of someone in the kitchen. Caleb was curled into her back and she smelled coffee. There was a light knock.

  “I have coffee, Aunty.”

  Caleb whispered, “She’s very proper with ArT.”

  “Come in, Tara.”

  Tara came in, smiling. “I was going to say I had a good night, but it looks like you had one too.”

  Caleb stirred. “Better have a cup for me.”

  “Coming up. Hope you both behaved yourselves. Auntie’s Virgo is after mine.”

  Ara turned her head, avoiding the sparkling blue eyes, and heard Tara tut tutting as she left the room. Caleb tugged at her as she rolled on to her back. “Oops.”

  “That’s probably why they register everything.”

  Ara didn’t care though. She doubted her Virgo night would be as good as it was that night.

  C. Are you happy?

  A. I am, you?

  C. Very, that was … wonderful

  But a tiny seed of annoyance crept in remembering Meg’s words. “Caleb made it special.” Ara felt like crying and dashed off to the toilet to hide her hurt. She stared at herself in the mirror. “Why raise that, you moron?” But Meg didn’t have Virgo either, she hated the comparison as it sullied their experience. She splashed cold water on her face and dried it before using the latrine. After washing her hands, she left the bathroom. Seeing Caleb leaning on the back wall, patting the bed, her annoyance fled.

  He said, “I don’t think we should push it any further, but you should know the ice fields are still sound. We can go climbing today.”

  She nodded, crawled over the bed and noted a second cup already on the table. Caleb handed her a cup and she heard singing in the kitchen. He said, “Tara is a bit happy about this.”

  “I noticed.”

  They had a wonderful day ice climbing but Ara tired half way, and headed down the ice wall, content to watch father and daughter climb. Caleb had a lot of patience with Tara, and looked back to check to see if she was okay.

  The day after Caleb left, Trickster’s words came crashing back to Ara. In an almighty fit, poor Tara witnessed Ara as she was a girl, throwing a tantrum. They giggled after but Tara never forgot it.

  Tarus sculled a drink and it burned all the way down.

  He slid off his stool, walked over to the foyer to go to the bathroom, heard a door open and when he glanced over his shoulder, Ara walked in. She shied away from the ruckus as he shied away from her. That was close. The females had been talking about the Adonis and the last thing he wanted to hear about was some drop dead gorgeous Avatara. Evidently, Ara didn’t want to hear about it either. Since neither Caleb nor Tara was present, he guessed it was a short visit and decided to stay. He left the bathroom and returned to the warm tavern, finding his meal on the counter with a beer. He was going to attend a play in a few nights held by the resort. He thanked the barman and took his meal over to a corner table.

  “It’s quieter in here now.”

  The thin, cleanly shaven barman laughed. “Yeah, they spotted Lady Ara trying to sneak in and headed towards her.”

  Tarus laughed. “Poor thing.”

  They both heard some squealing from the other room.

  “Ara will hate it at the moment, she was sick—” the barman saw his expression but mistook it and said sharply “—not from the food.”

  Tarus smiled. “I’m sure the food’s fine. Is she alright?”

  “Some allergic reaction, bitten by something the medic says.” The barman turned red as if thinking he’d said too much. “I’ll leave you to your meal.”

  “Thanks.” He sat down and began to eat, seeing the barman send him the occasional glance but then resumed whistling again, satisfied Tarus wasn’t put off by his comment. Tarus ordered dessert too.

  He contacted Viper on his new slim-line Voice while he waited for his dessert and coffee. Cobra answered.

  “Did either of you do something to the target?” He explained what he knew.

  “Not I.” Cobra said but, with his voice fainter, asked, “Viper, did you do something to Ara? She was bitten or something, had an allergic reaction.”

  Tarus heard something that made his guts churn. In the background, Viper was saying, “No, but that gives me an idea for one of the Function Tests … did you hear that?” Cobra was back, louder, while Viper was still talking in the background.

  “Got it.”

  “Any other updates?”

  “No.”

  “We’re not yet sending insects to attack her body.”

  Cobra’s voice was sardonic, getting Tarus’s back up, but he had to laugh as well.

  “Don’t blame us for messing with one of your moves.”

  Tarus was back to feeling aggravated over Cobra’s comments. As if sensing his mood shift, Cobra apologized. Tarus ended the call, just as dessert came in and Ara was sneaking in the open door. The barman nodded and pointed to a side door. Relief filled the strained face and she headed out. There was something different about her other than the faint dark smudges beneath her eyes. It was hard to determine the change in her, but something had happened sexually with her. Even as the Sawol part of the Triad, the sex restriction still applied to him because, at the Triad Core, all three parts still locked them together. Tarus could only draw on sexual energy to wield Chaos, just as the other two were restricted. Viewing her as she reached the side door and waving to the barman, he connected to the sexual energies, from the sexually charged males and females in the room across the hall, to draw on Chaos and saw the incandescence around her was darker now, with flecks of ice-green, indicating Ara was sexually mature with Caleb. But it was the Chaos way, not Iotan way. His fingers hovered over the Voice keypad. He should tell Cobra and Viper, they had all agreed to notify the others when t
hat happened. Tarus sent the message and used the fork to slice his cake; it was caramel, his favorite, with fresh whipped cream. His Voice beeped so he read the message and replied, “Don’t know who with. Color not definitive.”

  Tarus felt the Caleb and Ara games had gone on long enough. They would either repair the damage or not, but that avenue was now closed. And that led to the first major argument when Viper checked in a day later and saw the ice-green streams.

  Watching the play, Tarus laughed at the witty dialogue of the actors when he felt Viper somewhere in the small theatre. Since it was unannounced it was probably urgent but he waited until the intermission before he sought out his counterpart. Viper was leaning on a wall in the foyer. From the narrowed eyes and sly smile, Tarus knew he’d blown it.

  They went to his room and Viper poured himself a measure of vodka, from the Russian continent on Gorgo, a planet in Estancia Station. “Why lie to us about Caleb and Ara? Before you lie again, I saw the ice-green stream.”

  Tarus shrugged and sat down on the soft sofa. Viper joined him and sipped his drink.

  “You’ve lost our trust. Cobra couldn’t even face you.”

  “I still support the Chaos Brethren. What I don’t support is the underhandedness.”

  “Then I suggest you get on with your job and remove yourself. This is just the start and we didn’t ask you to monitor our corruption, it won’t help if we are always questioning our bloody morals.”

  “You are headed up a glassy route with few hand and foot holds.” But at least Viper hadn’t noticed the strange bright filament in both Ara and Caleb. It was Chaos, Tarus was now sure of that.

  “One more chance, Tarus.” Viper sculled the rest of his vodka. “The Chaos Brethren are breaking away from their duties under the reign of the Natal and rallying in one of the test sites. Finally, they are forging their future and ready to risk all to free the Chaos Entity and win the war.”

  “Good, now think on this.” Tarus leaned towards him to make his point clear. “The Chaos Brethren will call us, and we will account for our actions.” Even saying it aloud, a biting sensation coursed down Tarus’s body.

  Viper shuddered and rubbed the back of his neck.

  “Try the alliance, Viper. At least you can temper your actions with that. I know you love her as much as I.”

  Sub-Log XXII

  Saratoga City

  After the wonderful night, and then years where they parted ways again, Ara found Caleb back in her life as he taught one of her classes. It was almost embarrassing being the oldest student, a year younger than the tutor.

  Tara, very much a pretty, blonde adult poked her head through the door. “Caleb, are we still on for dinner? Oh, sorry.” The blue eyes took in their body language. “I’ve interrupted something.”

  Caleb said, “I’ll see you on time.”

  The blue eyes honed in on Ara who was grinning. “Ara!”

  She burst in and Ara caught her in a tight hug. “Tara. Cheeky girl.”

  “Like my dad.”

  “And your mum, Meg was quite the brat.”

  She laughed and glanced at her dad and then back at Ara. “You are coming to my 70th aren’t you?”

  Ara had missed Tara a lot over the few years she had been off world. Meg’s orders. Tara connected with her implant to communicate mind to mind—proper like.

  “I have to invite Mum. Oh, she thinks you are responsible for the strange fluctuations in my age.”

  “Huh?”

  Tara giggled. “I’ll tell you later.”

  Caleb coughed.

  C. Watch this, Ara. This will prove how much she hates short cut ArT

  Caleb smiled at his daughter.

  C. Tara, did you—

  “Dad!” Tara gave her dad a stern look.

  “Of course.” Ara tried not to laugh.

  Tara shook her head at Caleb, leaned in and whispered to Ara, “I think Dad’s made me a ranger, like your Seeker.”

  Ara smiled. She’d helped design it. “Don’t think so, you’re too young.”

  Tara screwed up her face and then looked around the room. “What are you two up too?”

  Ara sighed. “It seems your father is my teacher for this class.”

  Tara’s mouth gaped open. “No way!”

  She and Caleb laughed softly.

  “You give him grief, Aunty.”

  “I will.”

  “Dad will be busier than ever with his new girlfriend too,” Tara said sharply.

  Caleb flushed.

  Tara smiled and leaned in and kissed his cheek. She waved airily and left them.

  Ara turned to him. “New love?”

  “Lover.”

  She didn’t know why she even cared still but she didn’t mask her irritation quickly enough. Caleb was grinning and he walked to the desk trying to hide his pleasure.

  Caleb looked up at her. “Tara still loves you a lot.”

  “She’s adorable. But any child of yours would be.” Ara changed the topic, not wanting to give him ideas. “Still hunting?”

  He nodded. “My err … new lover is a hunter too. We’re hitting one of the new planets made for the—”

  She put a hand on his arm, interrupting him with her concern. “Caleb, I’ve heard those planets are dangerous.”

  He smiled tersely. “I hear that all the time but it’s my life, Ara.” He blew his cheeks out. “Let’s not start that argument again; I know what I’m doing.”

  “Please be careful.” It was why they had broken up again. Hunting. It was simply a dichotomy that would not resolve. Caleb loved it and Ara hated it.

  “I will.”

  “So bored with your hunting girlfriend you need the thrilling life?”

  They both grimaced at her biting tone.

  “Sorry, Monkey.” She flushed, having used his nickname.

  “No, not yet, Baby. But soon.” He grinned at the shock on her face and left the classroom.

  ***

  Saratoga Wildlife Park

  Some fifty-three years later, Ara was in the tearoom making herself a cup of coffee. They had just returned from trapping a special marsupial that was struggling to breed on King Cyrus’s continent and they were to run tests. At that point she’d been in contact with specialists around the Aryan Worlds. She had no contact with Trickster and, selfishly, maybe, she was glad. There were no Natal, no enemy traces, nothing. For the first time in her life, there were no logs. But she had no other physical relationships either. Ara attended Tara’s Virgo and met Korbet face to face. She reacted to him as she had with Kavela—like a love sick idiot—and she refused to put herself in the same category as Tara’s drooling friends.

  Where once fear kept her company at night, now a pervading loneliness did. Occasionally she even wondered what it would be like to have other Pure-Gens her age to grow with but that made things harder when reality came knocking.

  “I’m off, Ara,” a deep voice boomed from the passage.

  “See you next month,” she called out. “Enjoy your holiday.” Lucky bastard. Ara sighed.

  Most of her family was off, and rarely home. So much for their protective—Ara stopped herself. She was happy for them, and happy that life at the homestead wasn’t centered around her. But then, she thought a little nastily, it wouldn’t be good if the entire Aether family were housebound, it was sure to draw unwanted attention. In fact, if she was a honeypot, the seemingly unguarded honey must look very tempting now.

  Ara’s younger brothers were still on Saratoga. Gralten, Ashley, and Henry became her closest friends outside of Bel, Tekko, and Jesran. All her other friends left Saratoga and they still kept in contact. Ara missed them though and saddened seeing how quickly Inferor lives travelled and left her behind.

  “Mail’s in, boss.”

  Ara turned but the zookeeper had gone already. She left the window that she’d walked to at some point, just now registering the view. It was raining and there was low cloud. She headed for the table where a letter sat.
It had the Wilds insignia. Heart beating faster, she placed her coffee down and tore open the letter. It was an invitation to place an application to work for them. Ara read it several times and then jumped up and down. A real job! She flushed with mortification as she had proven herself over and over at the Saratoga Wildlife Sanctuary. That had been a real job. And then it came crashing down. Trickster had said she might have to move, and this was that. The sob caught her by surprise and she quickly ran to the toilets, trying to hold her grief in. As she cried, she slipped and cut her hand on the sharp corner of the cupboard that had broken away the week before. Blood spurted and Ara stared at the cut. She reached for the medical kit and cleaned the wound. Surprisingly, she felt better. After dabbing her watery, red eyes Ara headed out, knowing everyone had gone home by now. She grabbed the letter, waved to security on the way out and headed home.

  Homestead

  By the time Ara got home her hand was throbbing. She entered the carport even missing Gralten’s drumming. What was wrong with her? Melancholia. Dad was in the kitchen holding up a hot chocolate.

  “Thanks, Dad.”

  ‘Busy week?”

  “Exhausting but I’m going to fix the—”

  “Ara, relax for a few days. Work on your motorbike.”

  She sat wearily on the stool. “Do you miss everyone? I mean the kids?”

  Dad sat down next to her. “I do, but not the same way as you I suspect. Time is faster moving for us, in a way.”

  Ara’s eyes narrowed but she kept her mouth shut. Her parents, pretend Inferors, how long did the Aether live for anyway? She pulled out her invitation and, as Dad read it, his eyes widened. “This is great news, Ara. We’ll need to tell your protection unit. Though”—he said with a mischievous look that reminded her of Marc—“they probably already know.”