Birth Of A Goddess

by Mark T. Bacome

I AM... the voice answered.

  “You are?”

  Yes...

  “Your name is--”

  Names are irrelevant...I AM...

  “So--I would call you?”

  I AM...

  “I am Li.”

  Yes...that would appear obvious...

  “Do I know you?”

  Could you not?

  “I don't know. Where are you?” Li tried to scan the brilliance that surrounded her, although there were some vague, crescent shapes in the distance, she could not see the source of the voice.

  I AM...

  “I'm not sure I understand. This doesn't appear to be the Other Realm. Is this beyond?”

  You are at the edge...beyond the simple

  dimensions...yes...

  Li tried to take a look at herself, but found nothing to see. Even in the Other Realm she could see an energy formation representing her current bodily form. To be without was a sign she had separated from her physical form--crossed over, died.

  “Am I dead?”

  I have no reference...am I?

  “I-I don't think so.” Li felt confused. She could see a humanoid form drawing near, as though floating. She recognized the bodily form as herself. She could see a crystalline shaped scar in the skin between her breasts and a white streak of hair starting just over her left eye. Next to the naked form of her body, a glowing energy form approached in a similar shape, hovering around, together but separated.

  You are nearly all here...

  “Nearly?”

  Part of you is missing...you are not complete...

  “So I've been told!”

  *** Chichi loved his little sister dearly--from the very first moment his father had given him the responsibility to look after her. Chichi was proud of his responsibility and took it seriously. They played well together too.

  Anali had always looked up to her big brother. He protected her and didn't mind when she got silly. And-they played well together. Anali had found a small stream coming down from the ridge, flowing through an open meadow close to where Tooki had been sitting. She liked Tooki; he was silly-looking and had a funny name. But most of all, he would share his toys and show her fun stuff. She was determined to find something special, to show how much she liked him. The pretty little stream seemed to have magical possibilities--at least in her mind, so she followed the stream up the side of the clearing.

  Chichi watched as Anali followed the stream through the small meadow. He looked back to check on their progress and could still see TK sitting where they had left him. He appeared to be deep in thought, although it could be hard to tell with his funny eyes.

  The stream continued up and into a stand of pointy trees. Chichi was certain his father had called them 'cedars,' or 'always green.' He followed, keeping a watchful eye on Anali as she continued to see what was just a little further up the hill. They had never explored outside of the caverns before, and the new experience was exhilarating, as well as all the fresh smells and the warmth of Shola Rai above.

  A small, funny-looking animal hopped out in front of Anali and gave her a brief examination before deciding she was a threat and hopped away. The confrontation left Anali startled and she let out a little shriek of surprise.

  “What's wrong,” Chichi asked as he caught up with her.

  “A little am-aminal,” Anali explained.

  “What did it look like? Was it a night-singer?”

  “It was tiny, and furry, and had long furry ears and hopped that way,” Anali pointed further up past the small stream.

  “Are you sure? You're not making that up?”

  “I'm not!” Anali scowled. She turned and set out in the direction she had pointed.

  “Wait for me, don't scare it!” Chichi scolded and followed.

  *** Ayden found Toolkit sitting alone on a small rise overlooking the Elvonian construction project. Ayden had little technical knowledge about the project, only that it was going to protect the clans in the caverns from Cain. At the moment, he had a more pressing concern; Anali and Chichi had been gone all day from home and last seen with Toolkit that morning.

  Ayden stepped up next to Toolkit. “Excuse me, Toolkit?”

  “Hmm,” Toolkit muttered. He was deep in his analysis of Chichi's biofluid anomaly.

  “Have you seen Chichi and Anali?”

  Toolkit realized someone was addressing him, and switched over to external view. “What?”

  “Chichi and Anali...have you seen them?”

  Toolkit pointed toward the meadow but realized that had been many hours earlier. The sun was already past the ridge to the west, indicating late afternoon. “They were,” Toolkit’s voice failed. He felt as though he were unable to pull air into his lungs--they simply refused to function.

  “CHICHI! ANALI!” Ayden called, then waited a moment for a reply. The concern in his tone caught the attention of several Elvonians below, as well as a few clansmen outside of the cavern entrance not far away.

  Toolkit was trying to breathe, his legs felt weak and he trembled all over. They were both just there--how many hours ago now? He had told them to stay close.

  “Is there a problem?” one of the clansmen asked.

  “Chichi and Anali...they are not answering,” Ayden explained.

  “I see a trail in the tall grass--it leads up toward that small stream,” a young guardian announced, following the trail of tall, broken grass blades.

  Toolkit felt sick, his feet felt like they weighed a hundred kilotons each, stuck to the ground, unable to be moved. Worse yet was the look of devastation on Ayden's face, before he turned to follow the young guardian and the rest up the trail in the meadow.

  *** Snow still covered most of the top of Mount Wash, but Alex found a cleared area large enough to set the small craft down, albeit not level. The struts auto-leveled the craft as Kutch got the canopy opened.

  “Do you think they know we've arrived?” Kutch asked, while he searched for a small gear bag in a compartment behind the seating.

  Alex took a glance around to find several large humans already surrounding them and the craft, with long, pointed, metal poles. ::Yes.:: Alex answered over the internal coms.

  *** Following Anali as she, in turn, followed that small, long-eared, furry animal all day, allowed the hours to pass for both Anali and Chichi, without notice. Until the animal disappeared into a small hole at the base of a large pointy tree, Anali was not about to give up. But once in the hole, there was nothing more to be done.

  Chichi tried to retrace his steps, but the tall pointy trees all looked the same. Exploring outside of the caverns was far more difficult. In the caverns, he could put marks on the passage walls, to follow on the way out. He had not thought to do so today, in the excitement of chasing after the small animal. Unfortunately, they had left the stream hours ago, and was no longer in earshot either, so following the stream back down was not an option. Each new turn felt different and more confusing.

  “I'm tired, I'm hungry--I wanna go home,” Anali said through tears.

  “I know Ana, I know,” Chichi soothed.

  Anali was the first to notice the small opening at the base of the bluff they were following, in another attempt to find their way back. “The cav'ers.” She headed for the opening.

  “No Ana. I don't recognize this,” Chichi corrected.

  “Home! Mamma--” she argued, sounding sad but continuing for the opening.

  Chichi was trying to keep up, but his strength was tapped out, and Anali was able to outpace him. The opening was just large enough for Anali to walk through unimpeded, but Chichi had to duck under to follow. As dark as the small cave opening was, Anali was determined to find the caverns of home and she kept going, guiding herself with her hands on the jagged cave walls.

  From just inside the entrance, Chichi could no longer see Anali in the darkness. “Anali--COME BACK!” He took a couple steps inside and listened. He could hear her starting to cry and shuffling her feet with unsure steps
continuing further ahead. “Anali, come back.” He searched the walls for lighting crystals but there were none. The rock was loose and sharp. This was a very scary place, and Chichi pulled his night-singer stone from a pouch around his waist and held it in his hand. Li had told him it would keep him safe and brave in a time of need. He would certainly need that now.

  There were unfamiliar noises in the cave--groaning and cracking with echoes of rocks falling, coming from the depths. “Anali, please come back.”

  Anali continued on, certain this would lead home, when her foot caught on something and she tripped, falling over a ledge. She landed hard and let out a loud shriek that seemed to echo on at length into the distance.

  “ANALI!” Chichi cried out, as he stepped up his pace through the low, narrow passage.

  “Chichi! I fell down!” Anali's voice echoed from the dark.

  “I'm coming for you, stay there,” Chichi called back.

  “I'm scared, Chichi. I want to go home!”

  “I'll get you home, Anali...I promise!”

  *** “We...are the...Star Children...” Kutch said to the crowd of large humans, trying to make sure there was no chance of mis-understanding. “We have...returned. So...”

  ::So what? They don't seem impressed,:: Alex added. She was attempting to get back into the sled, but the large humans were persistent with their pointy poles, indicating she should continue to step away. Their poles were no threat against Kutch and Alex's PPDs, but Kutch was on the other side of the sled. Any PPD maneuvers might send either, or both of them, over the side of the mountain.

  “So--you may praise--our return?” Kutch added with a strained smile.

  *** The glow from the high clouds showed the last sunlight of the day, as Damus handed out light sticks to the searchers who would continue through the night. For everyone to continue the search through the night would be too dangerous, particularly at this time of year. So only a select group of guardians, with a couple of Elvonians with infrared gear, set out to continue the search.

  Ayden, as well as several clans-women attempted to keep Anaua calm, but she was beyond reason, wailing in distress, unable to even stand any longer.

  Novia led another group of clansmen through a prayer, when she noticed Toolkit still standing out on the rise alone in the darkness. When she finished she walked out to see if he was all right. “Toolkit,” Novia called to him as she approached. He continued to stare out into the woods above the meadow. “Toolkit?”

  “I told them to stay close. This is all my fault,” his voice sounded hoarse and ragged.

  “Come inside and warm up. The night chill is coming and you don't sound well,” Novia urged.

  “I told them I would be here when they returned. I promised. I can't break that promise!”

  “You can't stay here all night.”

  “I must. I can't move my legs, so I must. I promised.” Toolkit continued scanning the mountains. He could see the heat signatures of the search members through the trees, higher up the ravine, past the meadow.

  Novia realized everyone dealt with trauma and stress in their own way, and decided this was how Toolkit was going to deal with his. She wrapped her shawl around his shoulders. He didn't react at all, and she had to take his hand and force him to clutch at the shawl to keep it wrapped and staying over his shoulders.

  “You do what you must, and I will check on you later,” Novia said, and gave Toolkit a kiss on the top of his head. “This is going to be a long night.”

  *** Chichi thought it best to crawl to Anali in the darkness, than to possibly trip and fall. When he reached the ledge, he could hear her whimpering just below, but the echoes beyond were telling. This was a Death-Chute-a drop-off, and from the sounds of the echoes--a very deep one.

  Chichi reached over the edge down to the sound of Anali's crying. “Can you reach my hand?”

  “No,” Anali cried.

  “You're going to have to stand up and reach for my hand,” Chichi coached.

  “I can't, my leg hurts--I'm scared,” Anali said through tears.

  “Can you tell if there is enough room for me to come down?”

  Anali felt around where she sat. “I think so.”

  Chichi tucked his night-singer stone into his shirt, then turned and lowered himself, feet first, over the edge, careful not to land on Anali or fall. As he lowered himself down as far as his arms could go, he realized he still couldn't reach the ledge. “Can you see me, Anali?”

  “No.”

  “Can you see if I will land on the ledge if I drop?”

  “I can't see you,” Anali said, with a tone of frustration, and started crying harder.

  Chichi took a deep breath. As the part of the upper edge he clung to started to crumble, he let go.

  *** Novia had given Anaua a herbal tea to calm her from her hysterics as Ayden took a few sips from his own to calm his nerves. He noticed Toolkit still at the rise, facing the small meadow and the search area above.

  “He's hurting, like you and everyone else tonight,” Novia said under her breath.

  Ayden knew the comment was directed at him. He wanted to be angry with Toolkit--that would be easy. But his own guilt kept getting in the way. He had been busy with Anaua that day--some much needed alone time. He knew the children were with Toolkit, and that should have been okay. Still, he could have checked on them earlier in the day. If only-

  Ayden walked over and stepped alongside Toolkit. “If I am to forgive myself, I MUST forgive others first.”

  “I will never forgive myself,” Toolkit offered through shivers.

  “They will be found, but no matter the outcome, I forgive you, Toolkit. You MUST forgive yourself as well,” Ayden advised.

  “I can't lose him again...” Toolkit whispered.

  *** The drop was the length of a hand at best, but Chichi could feel the ledge move, and he heard stones fall, echoing to the depths below. He got down on hands and knees and searched for Anali. She was only an arm’slength away, huddled up, and he curled up next to her. She was cold and shivering and he held her close to keep her warm with one arm and reached out to search the surroundings with his other. The edge was very close and crumbly. Pieces kept falling to the depths below, echoing back through the darkness.

  “I'm cold and hungry. I wanna go home,” Anali said softly, her voice catching.

  “I am too, Ana. Let me rest a moment, then we'll climb out. We'll be home soon,” Chichi assured, trying to catch his breath. He had never felt so weak before. He needed to be brave, and protect his little sister.

  They sat huddled to keep each other warm, listening to rocks falling into the darkness. Chichi thought back to a time when he heard the Elders talk about different kinds of rocks and stones. Living Rock was strong, firm and could hold the tallest mountains with ease. Dead Rock was stone that crumbled, was not firm and most often found in Death-chutes--deep holes, where rocks go to die.

  Over a lengthy bit of time, the sounds of falling dead rocks grew louder and Chichi felt the ledge shift. Anali had fallen asleep but was awakened by the movement.

  “We have to leave--now,” Chichi said with urgency.

  “I still can't see,” Anali complained.

  “That's okay, hold onto me.” He took care to stand and feel the side of the ledge to the upper edge, but he couldn't reach and every piece of rock sticking out to climb on, crumbled away. He knew the upper edge was up there so he tried to jump for it. When he reached the top edge, the rock crumbled under his grip and he dropped back down to the lower ledge. Again, the lower ledge shifted even further, causing Anali to let out another loud shriek.

  “It's okay, Anali.” Chichi took a moment to think as the sound of falling rocks grew louder. “Anali, climb up onto my shoulders, I'll lift you to the upper ledge then I'll climb up after you.”

  “Okay,” Anali sniffed, trying to be brave. “But I'm scared.”

  Chichi thought of something and pulled his nightsinger stone from his shirt. “Hold on to
this, it will protect you and make you brave!” Chichi offered his hand with the stone to Anali so she could feel it in the dark.

  She held the stone and climbed up onto Chichi's shoulders. He steadied her and boosted her up onto the upper ledge. She shimmied over and turned back, reaching down to Chichi, but she couldn't reach far enough from the crumbling edge.

  “Are you on the top?” Chichi asked.

  “Yes, I'm trying to reach back for you--”

  “Move back, I'm coming up.”

  Every hand-hold crumbled under his weight and grip, so Chichi attempted another jump up to the top edge. Once again, the edge crumbled under his grasp, and he dropped back down to the lower ledge. Again, the lower ledge shifted under the added strain, and more rocks could be heard falling to the depths, echoing into the darkness.

  “CHICHI!” Anali screamed.

  “I'm right here...” He steadied himself on the shifting stone and took another jump for the top edge. His grasp appeared to hold and Anali grabbed at his hand, trying to hold on. He was beginning to pull himself up, when the rock under his grasp gave way, crumbling to a pile of sand. Anali had no chance of holding Chichi, and he slipped away from her small hand.

  When he landed back on the lower ledge, his weight and force were too much for the stone slab to resist. The rotted rock below gave way. The weakened stone structures around also gave way following Chichi and the lower ledge into the darkness. He felt himself falling, but was certain Anali was safe. That was all that mattered, he had been brave and protected her.

  “NOOO!” Anali screamed her fears, as more rocks continued to fall from around her. She felt a tug from behind, and was being pulled away by an unknown force. She tried to fight her way back to help Chichi, but something hard and heavy hit her head.

  *** Damus and the rest of the searchers returned in the early morning hours, their expressions told everyone waiting the results--they were empty handed. The waiting clansmen and family could be heard sobbing, as more fresh faces appeared to begin a new long day of searches. Toolkit sunk to his knees in grief, but continued to watch the tree line above the meadow.

  There was something more, but Toolkit could not be sure yet. There were heat signatures, small, but several, eight or nine. They approached the tree line and all but one stopped. No one appeared to notice, except Toolkit. Appearing from the tree line a large four-legged animal, now familiar as one of the howlers he had seen during the snow storm, approached. It had something on its back.