Magic and Mayhem: To Yaga Or Not To Yaga (Kindle Worlds Novella) (Baba Yaga Saga Book 3)

by Donna McDonald

  “Dark forces?”

  Morgana dropped her hands and stepped away. “I cannot tell you which ones because it is part of their test. But you may help the Chosen Ones find suitable weapons for dealing with such unholy creatures.”

  “Unholy,” Jezibaba repeated, staring off into the trees. That meant demons, vampires, and those who did not need magic to do their worst. Such creatures remained a challenge for her to fight. How much of a challenge would they be for the girls?

  Even though she’d known their test was inevitable, and she looked forward to stepping down from her role as a mentor, she’d still grown quite attached to Carol and Hildy. She wouldn’t be able to help them with the hardest parts of this. She wouldn’t be allowed to intervene.

  “Do not worry, Elenora,” Morgana continued. “If they don’t survive the test, I will find a way to extend your life. The magical world will not go without a genuine protectoress of my choosing. I will not allow the Council of Witches to succeed in removing my champion from service.”

  She couldn’t really answer her goddess about that one and walk away unscathed. The prospect of eternal life might have thrilled some magicals. She felt only despair at the thought of living forever, especially if it meant continuing this work. She was so very tired of fighting and battling and being responsible for all the justice in the magical world.

  Maybe she just needed a really long vacation… somewhere with troll ale and immortal hot springs for soaking. She’d take Damien along because the sex would be great. They had a lot to work out between them anyway, especially if her obligations were no longer to Hildy and Carol.

  Yes, time away would be nice. Very nice. Maybe when this was all over.

  Morgana disrupted the fantasy. “Elenora! This is no time for you to give in to your weaknesses.”

  “Sorry, I… I think I really need some sleep,” she said.

  “Go back to your dragon then,” Morgana said tersely, turning away.

  Reeling now from power withdrawal as well as exhaustion, Jezibaba stepped back and drew in a shaky breath. “I’ll talk to Carol and Hildy tomorrow,” she promised, hoping she could find a way to help her future replacements survive whatever they would face.

  Chapter 2

  Carol opened her eyes as she came out of the omniscience spell Zenos had taught her. She’d mastered it, except for one little problem. She blinked as Hildy stared at her, worry in her eyes.

  “How long was I gone this time?”

  “Half an hour,” Hildy replied.

  “Damn. I can’t go that long without protection. I have to learn to be quicker.”

  “Or we need to recruit the most badass warlocks we can find when we take over from the Jezibaba. Muscles. Tattoos. Nose rings. I’m talking burly men with magic and some serious brawn under their robes.”

  Carol snorted. “You’ve been hanging out in the mortal world again, haven’t you?”

  Hildy twirled a lock of her long hair. “Maybe,” she hedged.

  “Which was it this time? Pet stores or veterinarians?”

  Hildy flexed her fingers as she rose to pace. “I no longer visit veterinarians. Mortal vets cut animals open to work on them. I just don’t think that’s necessary.”

  “Pet stores are just as bad. You shouldn’t be charming mortals into adopting animals they don’t want.” Carol sighed over the mutinous look on Hildy’s face. “We’ve discussed this before. You can’t change the rules of the mortal world. All you can do is be grateful you live on the magical side instead of the mortal side.”

  Hildy crossed her arms. “Non-magicals are not all that different from us,” she argued.

  “Are you nuts? They are very different,” Carol argued back.

  Hildy sighed and shook her head. “I really don’t want to argue. All we do lately is fight. We’ve been fighting since Zenos left. In a few years, we’ll be thirty, Carol—thirty. People should act mature by that age. We’re still arguing the way we did as teenagers.”

  Carol nodded, but was unwilling to discuss it. Fighting was second nature to her and the only way she’d found to truly resolve conflict. But with Hildy she found it much easier to redirect the conversation. “Does Emeritus know you’re visiting the mortal world so often?”

  Hildy nodded tightly. “He wanted me to see the worst of this world we live in. I think he wanted me to be traumatized by it all… and I am.”

  “I’m sure that wasn’t his true goal,” Carol said.

  Hildy shrugged and an uncomfortable silence fell in the room. The question that hadn’t been asked yet was all that was really left to be spoken aloud. She could see it was up to her to ask it. Carol was frowning and had already withdrawn inside herself.

  “We can’t afford to keep avoiding the giant elephant topic. What did you see in your vision?”

  Carol shrugged. “I don’t want to talk about it tonight.”

  Hildy walked back and stood close to her friend. “We have to talk about it, especially if you don’t want to talk about it, because that means it’s really important. I know something’s going on because the cats are hovering around me all the time. I can’t go anywhere without one of them tagging along.”

  She turned and glared at Carol’s bed. Ahmed, her purse dog sized familiar, was lying quietly on top of it watching both of them with worried doggie eyes. Under the bottom edge of the cover a giant cat tail swished across the floor.

  Hildy held out a hand and pointed her finger. “See? Fat Bastard is under your bed. He thinks I don’t know he’s there.” She raised her voice so Fat Bastard couldn’t pretend not to hear her. “You don’t fit under the bed and I can see your tail. I swear… tomorrow you’re all three going on a diet. I’m halving your kitty kibble until you guys get into better shape.”

  They both laughed when the tail stopped switching and disappeared. The bed bumped upwards as the cat crawled further under it. Ahmed raised his head and growled at the movement. He tolerated the cats, but he didn’t like them.

  “I can’t believe you named him Fat Bastard. I mean it fits… but it’s so not nice. You don’t usually do that sort of thing.”

  Hildy snorted. “He came with that name, but it does fit. He keeps outgrowing his cat bed. He was so stinking cute as a kitten. Now he’s just annoying. They’re all annoying. Ever since I got real breasts, they sit and stare at me while I’m in the shower. I don’t like it. They’re like creepy old guys instead of cats.”

  Carol grinned as she looked at Ahmed on the bed. The djinn now serving as her familiar was amazing and she hoped he stayed around. With familiars you never knew when they were moving on. Another one would just show up and that was the only warning you got. She’d learned to be grateful for Ahmed’s presence, and to show her appreciation daily, which the djinn seemed starved to hear.

  “I love you, Ahmed.” Ahmed barked twice in answer. It was his version of a yes. Carol turned back to Hildy. “In my vision, I saw the Jezibaba talking to the Goddess. She said it was time.”

  “Time for what?” Hildy asked.

  Carol rolled her eyes. “Time for us to take over for the Jezibaba. What is wrong with you, Hildy? We’ve known this was coming. Zenos told us we’d have to take over before we were thirty.”

  Hildy sighed and frowned. “Yes, I knew that… and nothing’s wrong. I’m just tense.”

  “Tell me about it. You need to get laid,” Carol declared.

  “No, I don’t. I’m not like you. I believe in fidelity.”

  “Will you stop with that? Iren and I broke up six years ago because he was promised to an Elvin princess. He knew he’d never give her a fair shot if we stayed together… and he was right. Iren was my first and our relationship was wonderful. But I’ve moved on and so has he now. We are friends, Hildy… and nothing more. I’ve seen him with LaRee twice and it was fine. Maybe I wanted to set her hair on fire at first, but I didn’t do it, so it’s all good.”

  “I can’t be that casual,” Hildy complained.

  “Sure you c
an. You just need more practice. Try out Nathaniel. He’s gotten even hotter over the years,” Carol said with a shrug. “And he likes you, Hildy. I see him watching you sometimes. I think he’s interested in you as a woman.”

  “Well, I’m not interested back. Nathaniel’s old. I mean, not Zenos old, but still… old.”

  Carol snickered. “Everybody is old compared to us, but celibacy sucks worse than being with a hot, old guy. Trust me. I’ve done a lot to handle my needs.”

  Hildy snorted. “Needs—right.”

  “Yes—needs. You’ve got them too, girlfriend. Lie all you want. It won’t change the truth.”

  Hildy went to a nearby chair and slumped into it. “I hate dragons and there are no shifters around here who aren’t students almost a decade younger than me. Even the ones of legal age are all idiots. I can’t believe we were ever like that. I want someone intelligent, kind, but an animal in bed. What is so wrong with that?”

  “Nothing at all, but in the short term you could be a lot calmer if you’d just test drive a warlock once in a while.”

  “I know what I want and it’s not here at Witchery U,” Hildy said stiffly.

  Carol studied her friend’s sad frown. “Are you still bummed about your Baby Bear leaving? You never got attached to the others you’ve babysat over the years. Goddess Hildy, that shifter went home years ago. What’s it been now?”

  “Nine years, seven months, three days, and four damn hours. Don’t harass me unless you want to be the first Baba Yaga toad,” Hildy declared. “I never even got to see him grow up. He just left and never stayed in touch at all.”

  Carol laughed. “Goddess, you’ve got a real problem with your obsession with him. I mean… is he even a fully grown shifter yet?”

  “I told you shifters age differently. Chuck grew completely up within three years after he left me.”

  Carol rolled her eyes. “He didn’t leave you, Hildy. He left school and went home to his family. A few hundred other shifters have done the same in the last decade.”

  “Shut up, Carol. I know I can’t have him. I know he’s not for me. He lives in some goddess-forsaken part of West Virginia in some sort of hodgepodge shifter community. Supposedly, there’s a werewolf king running the group. A deer shifter—who knew those existed—apparently runs the local restaurant. From what I can tell, no humans reside there. I doubt any witches do either.”

  “So go and check him out,” Carol ordered. “You can pop there and back in a day.”

  “What’s the use of torturing myself? The town is so small and boring. I can’t… I just can’t. What if he doesn’t even remember me after all this time? I’d die of embarrassment if he’s already settled down with some big-breasted mama bear who’s had his cubs already. I will not sink that low.”

  “Geez… get a grip, Hildy. He’s just returned to the place he’s supposed to be. Bear shifters are supposed to live in the woods of low populated areas. Cut the bear some slack.”

  Hildy glared. “You’re so not helping me here.”

  “Help—right. Forgot that was my goal for a second.” Carol tilted her gaze to her ceiling. “Okay. Let’s look at this from another perspective. You probably don’t want a bear anyway. They hibernate. He’ll leave you to rely on your mechanical boyfriends all winter long. If you simply have to have a shifter, you need to focus on another kind of animal. Werewolves have a lot of stamina. You’ll definitely get tired in bed way before they do. I can’t handle them and that’s saying a lot.”

  Hildy groaned, mostly because werewolves didn’t do it for her. They were too much like a dog and she just wasn’t into any sort of canine. “You have no empathy for me… none at all. I think I hate you.”

  “Why would you hate me? I’ve tried to fix you up. You keep saying no to the guys I find. Even a warlock can get you there. No, they’re not all that great in the sack compared to shifters, but some are good enough for a night or two. Lower your standards a bit and start living again.”

  Hildy sat up. “Holy shit, Carol. Did you boff Nathaniel and not tell me?”

  Carol laughed loudly. “Goddess, no. I scare Nathaniel too much. If you must know the details, I’ve mostly been sleeping with dragons around here. They’re old enough to be talented and too arrogant to be scared. Lately I’ve been thinking about trying out the new vampire biology professor just to see what that’s like.”

  “Ewww… he’ll bite you just as you… you know.”

  Carol smiled and nodded. “Yes… if I’m lucky.”

  Hildy made a face. She also felt sick at the thought of being intimate with a vampire. Her sexuality had been damaged after Thane had spelled her into desiring him all those years ago. Something was seriously wrong with her. She wasn’t happy being alone, but she didn’t know how to fix the situation either. And now everything was about to get much worse.

  “Every time you get that look on your face I start to worry about you. Are you okay?” Carol asked.

  “No,” Hildy answered truthfully, shaking her head. “I need to go get some rest. When do you think the Jezibaba will tell us?”

  “Tomorrow,” Carol said, having heard the Jezibaba say so in her vision.

  Hildy sighed, knowing her friend was rarely wrong about her premonitions. “Fine. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

  “Wait…”

  “What?”

  “Take your creepy cat familiar with you,” Carol ordered.

  Hildy nodded. “Right. Come on, kitty,” she ordered, using the stern tone she’d learned got the fastest results with her cats. The bed jumped around as Fat Bastard worked to extract himself from under it. Ahmed growled at the ruckus, but didn’t bother moving this time.

  Carol snickered as the now freed cat sauntered out of her room, all but prancing in front of Hildy as he exited. There had been a time she’d been jealous of Hildy having the cats. Now she felt nothing but grateful that she’d been assigned Emeritus instead. It was funny how your perspective changed as you grew up.

  “No matter what happens, I will always have your back. We’ll deal with the shit storm tomorrow, Hildy. Sleep well,” Carol called.

  “You too, Carol,” Hildy answered absently.

  Carol smiled at her fellow Baba Yaga witch who sighed heavily as she left.

  ***

  The insistent knocking on their chamber door had his beautiful, young wife shifting uneasily beside him in bed. He put a hand on her waist, tracing the perfect curves he’d given her. “Pay it no mind, my dear. I will see what alarms the servants at two in the morning. They will regret this disturbance if it’s not important.”

  Her soft, sleepy laugh over his threats didn’t make him happy, but he forgave her because she was young and beautiful. Women with brains were too much trouble and they often were not fun to lie next to all night long. They wanted to talk and debate and argue about right and wrong. The best thing he’d ever done with his magic was take on the ugliest girl he could find and transform her into his dream woman.

  Belting his robe, he went to his door and opened it. “Isobelle,” he said in surprise, staring at his niece. “This is a highly unusual time for a visit.”

  “I disagree, Uncle. It’s the perfect time. My spies have informed me that the Goddess Morgana paid the Jezibaba a visit this evening. After letting a tree destroying fairy escape, they spent a half hour having an unshielded conversation. I have learned much this evening and came straight here to share my news.”

  Lord Byron stepped outside and closed his door. “Indeed. That does seem worth waking up for. Let’s go to my study. Would you like some tea?”

  “Great minds do think alike, Uncle. It’s already been brewed. I just knew you’d want to hear this without delay.”

  Lord Byron chuckled and put his arm around his niece. “I don’t understand how your father and mother could send you away as they did. Perhaps I should adopt you and officially make you my own.”

  “No need,” Isobelle answered. “I’m the child of your heart—just like
you’ve always told me I was.”

  “Indeed you are, my dear. Indeed, you are,” Lord Bryon readily conceded.

  They sat in his two chairs next to a crackling warm fire that had been freshly started in the hearth. A steaming pot of tea and some sweet biscuits waited on a tray. Isobelle smiled and poured for both of them, carefully placing two biscuits on each plate.

  “Now tell me everything,” Lord Byron said after he got comfortable with his late night treat.

  “The biggest news is that the Baba Yaga test is finally about to begin,” she said, biting into a biscuit. “According to my sources, the Goddess said those words herself. However, she also said the betrayers on the Council of Witches have aligned with dark forces. I know I’m not aligned with anyone, so I found that comment very strange. Who among our supporters do you suppose the Goddess was talking about, Uncle?”

  Lord Byron sipped his tea before answering. “Aligned is not really the proper term. It’s more like they’ve been hired to do some tasks for the council. It’s a temporary situation, I assure you. Only dark magic can hold them in this plane. No one we know is planning to join the dark side.”

  “I see… I didn’t know we needed that kind of magical help,” Isobelle said softly, setting down her cup. “What kind of dark forces, Uncle? Are we talking demons?”

  Lord Byron nodded briefly. “Yes, among others, such as the wraiths. Not everyone magically travels as well as you do, child.”

  “I can certainly see the value of using such power for our benefit. So who will our hired dark forces be answering to while they’re doing their tasks?” Isobelle asked.

  Lord Byron coughed and rubbed his throat. “Sorry. Dry biscuit.”

  “I think you’re stalling, Uncle. You taught me not to tolerate such tactics from someone I was questioning. Your confession about our hired help has made me wary.”