by Mj Fields
“It was William before Will died, it hasn’t changed, Jaxson,” He said as he grabbed his glass and drank down half of the beer. He was upset. Rightfully so. She was his little girl. “What are your reservations, let’s see if we can’t get through this and move forward.”
“Will. How would he feel? Will. Is his death causing these feelings? Will. Do you miss your best friend enough that you are tricking yourself to think you are in love—“
“I’m not confused, we aren’t confused. Frankie and I talked about Will when this first surfaced. We stepped back and waited to see if that was truly the driving force behind our feelings. It didn’t go away. I knew she and I had to be together, as much as she knew it.”
The waitress brought out the plates of king crabs and when she walked away we all sat silently. The three of them were looking down.
“Look, there is a lot more we need to discuss.”
Frankie looked up at me, “Jax.”
“No, Francesca.” My voice was sterner than I had intended. I looked at William. “I have fought this. There are one hundred reasons I should walk away and yet one keeps me here and ready to fight for her. I love your daughter. I will not let anything happen to her. I will not hurt her. I will cherish her. But what I won’t do is sit here and let her feel uncomfortable. I don’t want any of us to feel that. There is so much more you need to know. So much that has happened and I have protected her as best I can from what I know is to come. If this part is too difficult to handle then the rest will be impossible.” I placed my napkin on the table and stood up. I walked behind Frankie, put both hands on her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. “When the three of you have discussed this and if you want to move forward you know where to find me.”
I didn’t give them a chance to say a word. I walked to the door, handed the waitress a wad of cash, “This is for their dinner, the rest is yours.” And walked out the door.
As I was opening the door I heard William call my name and turned around as he walked towards me.
“What more don’t we know?”
“A lot. She has been through a lot. I will give her the opportunity to talk to you both. I am staying at The Hampton Inn just outside of town.”
“Is it Joel?” he asked.
“He is a player, yes. But there is more William. She needs to tell you.”
He looked dazed and confused, “Do your parents know?”
“It was brought up once,” I answered as honestly as I could.
“The girl on TV with you.”
“A friend only. It’s for my fathers campaign. I will be speaking to them Monday and that charade will be done.”
“What started this?”
I looked up as Frankie and Rosa walked out with take out containers, “I did dad.”
She took in a deep breath and looked up at me. “Let’s go to the house and talk, all of us.”
The four of us talked for three hours. They knew everything I did except for the fact that I had a child and that Frankie’s dark moments were spent being hit by Joel. They knew I had someone watching Frankie the entire time she had been home and now Frankie knew too.
When things had calmed down Frankie reached in my pocket and pulled out the ring. She slipped it on her finger and closed her eyes, leaning into me a bit. “Jax and I want to get married.”
“This is too fast. What the hell is the rush?” Her father asked.
It shook me a bit that he had an issue with this. But I understood. “We don’t like being apart.”
“But you think she may be in danger because of you.”
“I also think when she becomes an Irons she will be in less danger.”
“But that’s not a hundred percent.”
“Nothing’s one hundred percent Dad.” Frankie yawned.
We were all exhausted. Emotionally drained. Something I was not used to but had to embrace if I wanted to be with Frankie, and there was nothing in the world I wanted more.
Rosa hugged Frankie and then me before going to bed, William nodded and followed her.
I sat back against the couch and pulled Frankie so she was lying down with her head on my lap, “Get some sleep.”
Within minutes she was out and I was left sitting there staring at her in the home of my best friend who was now dead, holding his sister. When Frankie slept she wasn’t the feisty, mouthy, sexy as hell woman I had fallen in love with. She was an angel and even more beautiful than she was to me everyday.
“We’ll figure this out,” I whispered as I pushed back the strand of hair that had skated across her cheek. “No way in hell I will ever be able to let you go or let anyone hurt you.” I leaned back and closed my eyes.
“Jaxson.”
I opened my eyes and William stood before me.
“You love her?”
“More than I can even understand.”
“Alright. Your parents?”
“I don’t care what they have to say. It is you and Rosa I am concerned about.”
“You may feel that way now but--.”
“With all due respect, William, you and I both know what I am to them. I don’t really want to have this conversation.”
He sat down in his recliner opposite me and leaned forward. “What’s the rush?”
“We don’t want to be apart. You know the line of work I am in. I could get a call tomorrow and be gone for months.”
“Is that fair to her?”
I shook my head, “It won’t always be that way.”
“And what will happen to my daughter if she loses you too?”
I didn’t know what the hell to say to that.
“I can’t lose her too, Jaxson.”
“Me either.”
After a few silent moments he looked back up at me, “When do you intend on getting married?”
“If I had it my way, tomorrow.” I wasn’t going to lie to him. I knew I could keep her safe if she was with me.
“You said you’ll be speaking to your family Monday. Will you tell them that too?”
“I won’t hide my love for her. But I don’t need their blessing.”
“Is that why you’re here? To get our blessing?”
“Yes.”
“You have mine.” I looked up to see Rosa standing in her bathrobe as she walked in the room. She looked at William.
“Fine. We know you’re a good man Jaxson, you have mine but I need you to promise to keep her safe.”
“Of course. And I want you to accept that regardless of what my parents say I want to marry Frankie soon.”
I felt her move and looked down, “Tomorrow is fine with me.”
I smiled at her and she smiled back, “Sounds good.”
“No way. Not enough time to plan and--.”
“Jax and I, you and Dad. That’s all I need.”
“That’s all I want,” I helped her sit up.
“Next weekend then.” She leaned against me.
“Slow down,” William voice was unsteady.
“Dad, some things just can’t be tamed.”
~
When I left Sunday night, it was with the understanding that next weekend Francesca Cruz would become my wife. Regardless of what my parents said I would marry Frankie. Her father asked that we give them a chance to warm up to the idea and I said I would consider it and I had, for less than a second.
Monday evening I had dinner with my parents. Before we had even ordered I was given a schedule of upcoming fundraisers they had scheduled for Mimi and I. I didn’t say a thing until drinks had been served and dinner was ordered.
When I mentioned that I would be bringing Frankie they laughed and when I didn’t respond they both finally looked me in the eye for the first time.
“Jaxson, this is a very important time for our family.”
“Frankie is very important to me.” I said and sat back in my chair fully relaxed and ready to fight for what I wanted. “I love her. She is going to become my--.”
“Love her?” my moth
er laughed.
“Yes.” I took another drink and felt my blood heat.
“Does she know this?”
“She does.”
“Jaxson, your mother and I want you to think about what she will do to your future political ambitions.”
“Frankie knows and will support me.”
“I bet she will,” my mother hissed.
I looked over at her, “Did you hear what I said mother? I love Francesca Cruz.”
“That’s very childish and fairytale-like. Love fades, will she give up that necessity? The candlelight, the --.”
“She won’t have to.”
“Well as your mother I am telling you, this is political suicide, and I won’t support it.”
I nodded once, “I accept that.”
“Good.” She said and shook her head. “Let’s keep focused. We’ll have a nice dinner after we go over your schedule.” She pushed it back towards me and I took the pen and crossed out Mimi’s name and wrote Frankie over it. I shoved it back. When she looked back at me, my eyes met her cold lifeless mask. In that moment I missed Frankie even more. “This is unacceptable,” she hissed.
“Frankie and I are engaged. She will be in my life, accept it or not but if anyone even looks at her crossly, I can promise you both, hell will rise up and swallow whoever causes her even the slightest bit of discomfort.” I stood up and dropped my napkin on the table, and grabbed my suit jacket off the back of the chair. “You’ve been warned.”
Once I got in the car I called Shadows and Titan and gave them a heads up. Then I called Johnny. I couldn’t call Frankie until I had calmed the fuck down.
Tomorrow, I would go to see Mimi. I wanted her to tell me what the hell had gone on with her and that fucking Joel punk. Then I would tell her that Francesca and I would be getting married soon.
Chapter 5
Frankie
The start of forever
I lay in bed after the phone call with Jax. He was angry and I understood. I wanted to go to him but he asked me to stay put. He wanted me to figure out a day we could get married. I mentioned the weekend ahead of us and he said, couldn’t be soon enough.
He’d feel better if I was looking forward and preparing to take my rightful place at his side. He wanted me in white, something strapless, heels, the sexiest barley -there bra and panty set that I could find with attached garter belt.
It took me an hour to find something perfect online and less time to order it.
Mom and Dad seemed supportive, yet they were jumpy. I hated that they felt it too. When asked about the attack, I told them the same thing Jaxson told me, we look ahead.
I was surprised when Jaxson showed up on Tuesday afternoon. He told me they had night maneuvers and that was perfect because he and I needed to get a license to be married. After a marathon session of sex in the woods next to my old tire swing, the same place I had kissed him the very first time, we went into town and applied.
By the time we got back to the house Mom and Dad were there and as surprised to see him as I was. We ate dinner and he told them he wanted to marry me this Friday night, here, by the swing, just the four of us, Titan , Shadows, and the Rev. The Rev was a guy in his squadron I had only seen and never met. He got the name Rev, because he became ordained online when his sister was marrying one of their fellow soldiers before deployment.
He also told them his parents would not be informed, invited, or attending. The way he said it was cut and dry. No room or need for a reply. That night we slept on the couch again, like we had only days before. He left at three in the morning.
“Good morning Frankie,” My mom said as she came into my room, “What time did Jax leave?”
I sat up and yawned, “Three.”
She looked like she had even more on her mind than just making pleasant conversation.
I patted my bed and she sat next to me. “You have always wanted a big wedding Francesca--.”
“I don’t care anymore. I love Jax--.”
“Let me finish.” So I did I nodded and she continued. “There is no doubt in my mind that Jaxson will be a faithful husband and you a perfect wife. His family will always be a problem if this is how you begin. Hiding it from them is wrong--.”
“But--.”
“But,” she spoke over me. “Your father and I will support Jaxson and you one hundred and ten percent. I am not here to change your mind I am here to say what I feel. Now that I have done that, I want you to know that women get their fairytale weddings everyday Frankie, but many never find their true love. The way Jaxson speaks of you when you are not in the room, while you are asleep on his lap and he thinks no one is watching, and how he looks at you I know fairytale wedding or not, you have found your Prince Charming.”
Tears pooled in both of our eyes, “Because of Will Momma, I met him because of Will.”
We hugged and cried and then cried and hugged.
“There was no bigger supporter of Jaxson Irons in the world than your brother. He loved him and he would be so happy that he found love in you.”
Over the next two days Jax and I didn’t talk a lot and when we did, I knew he was consumed by something that he would tell me only when we were face to face. I sent texts every few hours telling him I loved him and he responded when he could. We were no longer using burner phones. He didn’t want to hide it. The battle was being fought in the light now.
On Thursday evening he sent a text saying he needed me now. I tried calling and he didn’t answer. It was evening, I knew he wasn’t at work and I was getting worried. He didn’t reply to my text and I was becoming anxious.
I was pacing in my room when my mother knocked once and walked in.
“Your fiancé’ is ten minutes from here, he wants you to be ready.”
She was smiling but tears touched her eyes.
“Is he okay? Why didn’t he call? Answer his text? Why--.”
“Shadows, Titan , and the one he called the Rev are on their way.” She walked to my closet and grabbed the dress I had gotten only this morning, the one I planned to wear when he and I became husband and wife.
I stood frozen and confused.
“Francesca, you need to get ready.”
“Mom?” I shook my head.
“Are you having second thoughts?”
“No, no,” I stammered. “But it’s Thursday and--.”
“Thursday, June 20th, 2013. The day you, my beautiful daughter, become Mrs. Jaxson Irons.”
I was confused, but not really, giddy, but nervous all the same, annoyed that I had ten minutes to prepare, but excited knowing that after we confessed our love and bound our commitment to one another in front of my parents, our friends, and God. It would take far less than ten seconds to take off the clothes and have Jaxson inside of me, connected in an entirely different level than ever before.
I tried to call him and was sent to voice mail. Then I received a text, telling me he refused to speak to me until I was standing in front of him saying it again, and sealing it with forever.
I dressed quickly, “Oh no, the shoes. Mom the shoes haven’t come in yet. They’re supposed to arrive tomorrow.” I was starting to panic.
“Sit,” she said calmly. She began brushing my hair the way she did when I was much younger. “The shoes don’t matter. Not today.”
“I want to be beautiful for him.”
“You are,” she smiled as she pinned my hair up in a twist.
I stood looking into the full length mirror in the corner of my room. My stomach a mess, my feet bare, my nails- oh dear God, my nails were a mess.
My father knocked once and walked in, “You ready?”
“No Dad, I’m a mess--.”
“I knew this was too soon. You--.”
“My nails and shoes dad. My heart, my soul, everything else has been ready to be his wife since I saw him walking up the stairs of our front porch when he and Will visited for Thanksgiving the first year they were at Annapolis.”
“You were twelve
, Francesca.” He shook his head as if he was erasing the thought.
“I knew then Dad. I knew I loved him then.”
We walked out the back door, my arm linked with my father’s and down the steps of the back porch. Jax wore his dress whites and I’m sure the other three men were wearing the same but I couldn’t peal my eyes off of Jax.
I’m not sure if I ever thought of him as anything besides strong, beautiful, or powerful when I first saw him. There was definitely a draw to a man like Jax, anyone around would watch him. Family gatherings were always interesting with my older female cousins ogling him and drooling. I remember overhearing my Aunts talking about the way he moved. At a young age I didn’t understand the innuendos but now I did. The way he stood with confidence. The way he walked, talked, surveyed every situation quickly and adjusted to conform in a split second. He was all man and as soon as I took a few more steps he would be all mine forever.
When we reached the ground I realized I had no shoes on. I looked down and gasped. Perfect, Frankie, I thought to myself. I peeked up to see if he noticed, his lip curled slightly, and his eyes softened. I held up a finger telling him one minute. I needed shoes. He shook his head no and curled his finger towards himself, beckoning me to him.
I took in a deep breath and took a step. A song I hadn’t heard before began, ‘When the rain is blowing in your face and the whole world is on your case, I could offer you a warm embrace, to make you feel my love. When evenings shadows and the stars appear, and there is no one there to dry your tears, I could hold you for a million years to make you feel my love.’
Dad and I walked slowly towards them. With my eyes glued to his, my ears filled with words of a beautiful song that Jax had chosen for me, for us. My heart was calm and so full right then, I felt it might burst, and if it did, I wouldn’t care. This moment was ours. Jax and my moment.
My fathers hand took my elbow and pulled my arm gently from where it had been tucked in his. He leaned over and kissed my cheek and gave my hand to Jaxson.
