“Thank you, Helena. Jonny tells me your house is by the sea; how long have you lived there?” A divertive question to steer Helena away from any more talk of my assets!
“The house used to belong to my parents. When they both died, I inherited it. Jonny was conceived there and was born there. It’s a very well-loved house.” She talks about her home with such great affection, as Jonny often does.
“You are very lucky to live by the sea. It must be so wonderful?” I say, looking across to a still smiling Jonny.
“Nothing beats it, Jessica . . . you must come and see the place.” Helena says with an illuminated grin.
“I’d love to.”
“So what do your parents make of all that is going on in your life at the moment, Jessica?” She asks with innocent interest.
“Both my parents are dead. Dad was never around; apparently he used to drink a lot. He died when I was three and Mum passed away of ovarian cancer when I was eighteen.” It still always hurts to explain why my mother isn’t around. I’ve had eighteen years experience of it, yet the pain never lessens.
“That’s tragic, my lovely. Do you have any brothers or sisters?”
I solemnly shake my head. “I was an only child.”
“Something else you and Jonny have in common then.” She smiles.
“So how long are you staying for then, Mum?” Jonny smiles at me with his rescuing eyes. His mum’s questions are in no way intrusive, but with everything going on, any deep conversations drain me. Talking about my mother is just another reminder of someone else I have lost.
“I am only staying a couple of days. I have some of my artwork in a local gallery, so I will need to get back for an exhibition they are doing at the weekend.” Helena explains with a smile.
“I’d love to see some of your work,” I say brightly.
“Oh, you must come to an exhibition soon,” Helena enthusiastically replies.
“What kind of work do you do?” I ask.
Helena thinks for a moment with pursed lips. “I’m not one who likes to be placed into a certain category, Jessica.
I paint from the heart. I love to paint the naturalness of all that is around us, capturing the spirit of movement we humans take for granted. The sea has been my creative friend for many years; however I do like to experiment with many sources of inspiration.”
“Mum has created landscape paintings using watercolour, pastels and oils. She loves to experiment; in fact a lot of the paintings in this apartment are Mum’s.” Jonny enthusiastically and proudly points at a couple of the impressive paintings, which surround us in the reception room.
My eyes glance at the beautiful canvases. “I’ve admired many of the paintings I have seen here, they truly are stunning.” I look across at Helena, who is looking at her own paintings with bright eyes.
“Thank you Jessica, that’s very kind.” Graciously, she smiles.
“So enough chatter, are you both hungry? Mary has cooked red snapper this evening?” I look at a happy Jonny, he clearly loves having his mum around.
“All that travelling has indeed made me hungry and very thirsty, too.” Helena holds up her near empty gin and tonic glass to an amused Jonny.
“We will eat in the dining room, Mum. I’ll get you another drink, but I’ll help Mary first. Okay?” Jonny glances at us both before leaving the room. It is very sweet to watch Jonny playing the attentive host to his dear mum.
“I wish I could indulge in a gin and tonic.” I smirk at Helena who puts her arm around me as we walk into the dining room.
“It won’t be long until you can, my lovely. I’d offer you a sneaky bit of mine, but Jonny would tell me off.” We both giggle. I really think Helena Riley and I are going to get on famously well!
Mary prepared a delicious red snapper grilled with lime butter, served with baby potatoes and sautéed vegetables. I had an enjoyable evening watching the natural closeness between Jonny and Helena. She is a spirited woman who has an abundance of stories to tell. She spoke of her life before becoming a mother, how becoming a mother changed her.
She also shared with me the most sweet, and charming stories of when Jonny was a child. He truly has inherited his mother’s charisma, passion and earthiness. I now fully understand what Jonny meant when he spoke about how his mum keeps him so grounded. She nurtures him with her experienced guidance and faithful support without trying to change the person that he is. I am in awe of the touching mutual respect they have for one another. It’s a joy to see.
After our wonderful dinner, Helena helps me carry the dishes out to the kitchen whilst Jonny relaxes in the reception room. “You don’t need to help me, Helena. Go and relax with Jonny, you haven’t come all this way to slave away in the kitchen.”
Helena grins. “I have an ulterior motive, Jessica. I wish to talk with you . . . alone.”
Shit! I knew it was too good to be true! “Oh, I see.” I swallow hard with nerves, looking down at the dirty dishes on the kitchen worktop; anything, just as long as I don’t have to look her in the eye.
“Don’t look so worried, my lovely. I honestly don’t bite.” I weakly smile as Helena steps nearer to me. She leans in closer still before placing a gentle kiss on my cheek. Her strong perfume of orange blossom, bergamot, musk and orchid is carried on the faint breeze that follows behind her. Enveloping both her hands around mine, she softly speaks, “Thank you, Jessica.”
“For what?” I ask with pleasant surprise.
“For making my wonderful son, so happy.”
I can’t help but blush. Her warm choice of words make me feel so very blessed. “I hope I continue to make him happy. He never fails in making me happy, Helena. These past few days have been so difficult. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without him.”
“Just keep loving him the way that you are, Jessica. You captivated him from the first moment he saw you. You treat him as a person and not a celebrity. I’ve seen a lot of fake people who come and go around him, who are only ever with him for their own gain. Then there are those who can’t handle the fame side of his life, and abandon him altogether. There is usually no middle ground for those in Jonny’s life.”
I open up the dishwasher and look over my shoulder at Helena who now has the dirty plates in her hand. I take them from her before speaking. “I think he has all the important people he needs by his side now, though.” I start to load it, but Helena stops me. She has a kind yet serious expression begging to be heard.
“That’s true, but it has been so hard for him knowing who he can truly trust. He may have this public image and it is an image he takes very seriously, but when he walks off a stage or a film set, he is simply . . . Jonny. Don’t ever let the celebrity side of his life affect your relationship, Jessica. He loves you and wants to be with you. I believe you want to be with him too, or you wouldn’t be here now. I know how difficult it must be without your daughters, but from what Jonny tells me, you are a wonderful mother. Your girls will eventually realise that and they will one day need you again.”
“What I am trying to say is, you and Jonny have both been to hell and back to get where you are now. Sometimes you will still have days that are going to be bloody hard, but you need to remain strong and remember why you are here.
I believe it is because of the love which now binds you both together . . . don’t ever forget that, Jessica.” Helena’s words of wisdom are almost poetic.
I finish loading the dishwasher, closing its door. I stand up slowly, looking at Helena. “I know it’s not going to be all plain sailing, but I love Jonny and I will do anything to hold onto our love. I do miss my girls terribly and now the pregnancy story has gone public, I honestly don’t know how they will cope with that.” It’s a relief to be able to share my worries with Helena. As a mother, she can fully understand my anguish over Lissy and Lottie.
Helena crosses her arms with angry frustration. “That is exactly why I can’t get my head around what your mother-in-law has done. She has c
ompletely ignored the feelings of her own son, and more so, the feelings of her granddaughters.
I would certainly hope she feels very ashamed of herself right now because she only acted out of malicious spite.”
I nod gently, looking at my feet. “I never thought she could be so heartless, yet part of me kind of understands why she has done it.”
Helena scowls. “Don’t you make excuses for her, Jessica. I know things have been awful for everyone involved, but to publicise something so private and tragic is just wrong on so many levels. Her son not only has your betrayal to contend with, but also his own mother’s, now.”
“I know.” I try to swallow down the lump forming in my throat.
Helena apologetically smiles, touching my arm. “When I say betrayal, I don’t mean to sound so harsh as I believe you cannot control matters of the heart. I am merely stating how your husband will see things. When Jonny first told me about you, he fought so hard against his feelings because he knew you were married. I know how you tried to fight your feelings too, but ultimately no ring or piece of paper can prevent two people from falling in love. As horrible as it is, it happens and there’s not one damn thing you can do about it.”
I lean against the kitchen worktop. “I thought I loved Shawn, I really did, but meeting Jonny changed my life. I love him more than anything. He has awoken every sense within me. I feel incomplete without him. I want you to know that, Helena. When I didn’t see him for a month, I thought I was going to die of a broken heart,” I quietly say, stopping for just a moment. Completely embarrassed by my sudden outpouring, I shyly look down at the floor. “I can’t believe I am actually telling you all of this.” I say, stunned by my openness with Helena. Her frank and grounded warmth just puts my soul right at ease, a quality I know I can trust.
Helena shakes her head with a small smile. “I am glad that you feel able to tell me. I can see with my own eyes just how happy you make each other. It won’t take long for the rest of the world to see it either. I am kind of relieved, too; if I’m honest, that I actually do like you, Jessica. I know how much it meant to Jonny that we get on. So can you imagine how awkward it would have been, if we didn’t?”
I am nodding enthusiastically and laughing. Oh, I certainly can imagine! “I thought exactly the same thing. I was scared you would hate me,” I admit.
Helena throws her head back with a laugh, clasping her hands together with a clap. “It’s a bloody relief all around, then.”
“It certainly is; I really do appreciate you not judging me, Helena.” I look into her eyes. I am just so grateful that she sees me for who I am, not who they say I am. Her eyes only look at me with genuine warmth and acceptance.
“Why would I judge someone who has fallen in love with my son? He is a very special person. I’d be more concerned if you hadn’t fallen in love with him, Jessica.”
I dreamily reply, “He’s an incredible person . . . he really is.”
Helena takes my hand and places it on my heart. “You may be able to control your thoughts, but you can never control what is in there.” I look at her, blinking back my tears as her words touch me deeply, just as her wonderful son has touched my life. She obviously has been a big influence on him and they share many beautiful qualities. Even the way Jonny catches my tears with his thumb, Helena does exactly the same as one slowly falls down my cheek.
“Tears of happiness, I hope?” she whispers.
Right then, I need to be with Jonny. The love I feel for this man has overwhelmed me. I graciously nod, slipping my arm through Helena’s; knowing that the man that I love more than I can sometimes comprehend is in the other room waiting for me. Once again, I feel blessed.
Helena has been like a breath of fresh air around the place. In the couple of days that she has graced us with her wonderful presence, she has helped us to forget all about the negative press, if only for a little while.
Both Jonny and I are a little sad to see her return to Devon.
She takes me in her arms, without hesitation, giving me an affectionate cuddle. “So, I will see you both soon?” Helena quietly asks me. I nod a solemn yes. She quickly hugs me again before turning to Jonny.
He wraps his arms around her and they both rhythmically rock in their sweet embrace. “We are going to have a Christmas party, Mum . . . will you join us?” Jonny asks.
“Of course I will, that sounds wonderful,” she says.
I step forward to say one last goodbye. “Take care, Helena. I have loved getting to know you and I look forward to our gin and tonic together.” I smile, kissing her softly matured cheek.
“Oh, me too Jessica. Look after one another. I’ll see you soon.”
“Love you, Mum.” Jonny kisses his mother affectionately.
“You too Jonny, bye now.” She strokes his face and then nods sweetly at Simon, who picks up her small suitcase and is ready to drive her back home. Standing there together, we watch his mum disappear into the lift.
I see the light in Jonny’s eyes fade a little. “You okay?” I ask.
He looks at me sideways with a faint smile pulling at his mouth. “Of course I am, I always miss the old girl when she goes.”
I swat his arm. “Don’t let her hear you calling her an old girl; she’ll string you up by your balls,” I laugh.
Jonny takes my hand, pulling me into him as a mischievous grin appears all over his charming face. “That she would.” He places a featherlight kiss to my wanting lips. “Talking of balls . . . mine are turning blue, Dimples. They are missing you desperately.”
I smirk at his pleading expression. “You have a one track mind, Mr. Riley.”
Jonny squeezes my body. “All I need is a certain lady’s pair of pleasure inducing hands.”
“That bad, huh?”
Taking my face into his commanding palms, he answers, “You have no fucking idea!” His lips collide into mine. His tongue pushes into my mouth, taking complete control of our hungry, unsatisfied kiss. In his hold, he pulls me into the reception room, slamming the door hard. He is breathless with dark desire clouding his eyes. I can’t let myself go. As much as I need him and sure as hell want him; my body is not yet ready. This is purely for Jonny. This is to satisfy only him.
“I want you so bad, Jessica. I’ve missed this!” His lips graze my neck; I feel his erection against me, begging for some attention. I quickly undo his jeans, reaching inside his boxers, to free him. As soon as I take his rigid cock into my hands, he shudders. “Fuck! I’d forgotten how good your touch is.” I smirk at his response.
I have the most beautiful man in the world, literally, a quivering wreck within my hold. It makes me feel dominant, aroused and sexy as hell. I turn my hand into a better position. I grip him firmly, working his steely length between my masterful palms. With each stroke, I feel him unravel more and more. He has needed this for so long. Our chemistry is so explosive that not being able to have sex has been torturous. For me, to be here now, giving him the best hand job of his entire fucking life leaves him crumbling beside me. My hand motions get quicker and tighter. The more I feel Jonny losing himself to me, the faster I go. My free hand cups his firm and nearing explosive balls.
Jonny can barely stand. His parted lips have incoherent low growls coming from them, as I continue to hand fuck him as hard as I can. Part of me wants him to rip off all my clothes and fuck me right here and now, up against the door.
As tempting as the idea may be, I continue my assault on his throbbing dick. His climax is near. He is wildly pulsing within my grip and with one throaty primal growl; he has to steady himself with one arm above my head on the door. “Fuck . . . me . . . Jessica!” He over-enunciates his every aroused word. As soon as his carnal expletives have left his mouth, he comes without restrain. His hips slowly push into me with each orgasmic wave that passes through him. He closes his eyes to enjoy every pleasurable pulsation that comes out of his now sated cock.
“That feels so fucking good, Dimples.” Jonny rests his perspiring
forehead against mine. His heavy arms pull me against him.
“I couldn’t have you walking around with weighted balls, now could I?”
“I’ll be returning the pleasure very soon, I can assure you.” He holds my face in his loving hands, kissing me hard.
“How would you have coped if your mum had stayed another day?” I giggle.
“Then you, Jessica Neel, would be upstairs right now and not down here.” He smirks at me before his expression becomes much more heated. “I just needed to feel your touch. I have been driving myself crazy with all the ways I have imagined how we can do other things.”
I push up against him. “Then I am glad I have been able to alleviate some of your sexual frustration.”
Jonny is still wearing his lopsided, boyish grin. “I remember the first time we met, actually,” he says. My eyes widen with interest as he continues. “I thought even back then, what unbelievable looking hands you had!” Unoffended yet unimpressed, I hit him in the chest and he laughs. It is so good to hear him laugh because with all the media attention that currently surrounds us, he has not laughed like this in a while.
“So, it is just my hands you love?” I slyly question.
Pinning me against the door, he softly speaks, “I love every single part of you, Jessica.” He starts to kiss my eyes. “I love you here.” He kisses my neck. “I love you here.” Lowering his head, he kisses my clothed breasts. “I love you here.” He then kneels down, kissing my stomach. “I love you here.” With a lingering stare, he hovers between my legs and then kisses me there. “And I definitely, love you here.” Then he stands up, his glorious face now in front of mine. “I especially love you here.” Our mouths meet and dance divinely in each other’s kiss, our tongues desperate to join.
A Famous Affair Page 25
