The Love and Loss of Joshua James

by Danni Roan

  As he approached, Joshua could see that they both wore some sort of loose trousers with a long jacket over the top and strange conical hats. As he studied them, it dawned on him that the two strangers were Chinese.

  An old man, thin as a rake, with a long white braid down his back, lifted a hand in greeting, while a younger man covered his eyes with his hand to better see the riders.

  “You all alone out here?” Katie asked, pulling her horse to a stop in front of the two.

  The younger man leaned over and whispered something in a strange language.

  “Yes,” the older man nodded, “We are alone.”

  “Where are your horses?” Katie asked, looking left and right as if expecting the animals to appear from thin air.

  “No horse.” The man spoke again, his voice a soft sing-song cadence. “We walk.”

  “Did you hear that, Pa?” Katie asked, leaning on her elbow where it rested across her saddle horn.

  “I did.” Joshua pulled his big, square-chested buckskin to a halt and looked over the newcomers. They looked frail and hungry to him, and he couldn’t believe that either one of them had been able to carry the large packs that sat near them on the ground.

  “Where you headed?” he asked.

  “Town.” The older man spoke again, but Joshua’s skin fairly crawled as the dark eyes of the young man examined him intensely.

  The boy, and that’s the only way Joshua could have described him, was small and thin, with delicate features and dark, upswept eyes. No trace of hair had even appeared on his soft cheeks yet, leading Joshua James to assume he was no more than thirteen at the most.

  “I’m afraid you’re a long way from any town,” he spoke. “The Platte River crossing is back that way by about a four-day ride, but otherwise there’s nothing closer.”

  The younger man pulled his long black braid over his shoulder, giving it an agitated tug, then leaned into the older man and spoke again in that same, strange language.

  “You can come back to the ranch with us,” Katie offered. “You can rest up and maybe figure out where to go next.” She cut her eyes to her father to see if he was alright with her kind gesture.

  “We’ve got plenty of room,” Joshua agreed, but he shivered as the young man’s luminous eyes rested on him again.

  Silent seconds ticked by before anyone else spoke, then the old man turned to his companion and discussed the offer in their language. It was clear they were uncertain of what to do.

  “My sisters sure would be pleased to meet you,” Katie encouraged.

  Finally, the old man nodded and the younger one gave Joshua a smile that chilled his blood. There was just something not right here, but he couldn’t place his finger on it, as if his eyes were seeing something that his brain just couldn’t comprehend.

  “Climb on board,” Joshua offered, extending his hand to the old man. “Buck can carry two easily enough, and if that sack’s not too heavy< maybe that as well.”

  “Thank you.” He nodded his gray head, “I am Chen Lou and this is my grandson, Wen.” His eyes were hard as he looked at his grandson, and again Joshua was sure he was missing something.

  “It’s nice to meet you both,” Katie offered excitedly. “Wen, you can ride up here with me.” She offered her hand as she pulled a foot out of her stirrup. “Have you ridden before?”

  “No,” the boy replied. His voice was high as if it hadn’t yet broken. “I have never ridden a horse before.”

  “Don’t worry, it’s easy,” Katie encouraged. “Pa, can you give him a leg up?”

  Joshua swung down from the saddle and walked toward the boy. “Just put your foot here,” he offered, cupping his hands together, “and on the count of three you jump and I’ll lift.”

  The dark eyes assessed him again and Joshua felt them prickle along his skin, but the boy laid his hand on the cantle of the saddle, lifted his small foot, and a moment later was seated behind Katie.

  “Here’s your bag,” Joshua offered, hefting the overstuffed bag. It wasn’t overly heavy, but bulky and awkward. “Do you think you can hold onto it while you ride?”

  The boy didn’t answer but twisted the pack behind him and slipped his arms through two straps that lay close to the rounded bag. “It will be fine,” he said, then wrapped an arm around Katie for support.

  “You just hang on and I’ll do the rest,” Katie said encouragingly. “Just don’t kick your feet or we’ll go fast.” She smiled reassuringly as her father got the older man up behind him on Buck.

  “It’s not a long ride back to the ranch, but it will take some time riding double like this. Just hang on and if you get tired, let me know,” Joshua said kindly. “We’ll get you home and fed, then you can decide what to do next.”

  “What were you doing out here anyway?” Katie asked, turning Pal toward home and making the boy behind her cling tighter. “Do you live here in Wyoming?”

  “No, no live here,” Chen Lou replied, “working on railroad but now no more work.” He looked at the younger man but said no more.

  “I’d heard the rail was running to the south, I know it was in Laramie, but it’s a slow process getting it across the country,” Joshua commented.

  The boy, Wen, spoke to his grandfather again in his language, but neither offered to translate the words for their hosts.

  “You live here?” Wen spoke in English.

  “Yes, we have a ranch, my in-laws and partners, and my five girls.”

  “And your wife?” Wen asked pointedly, garnering a scowl from his grandfather.

  “I’m afraid I’m a widower,” Joshua admitted sadly.

  Chen Lou barked a sharp word in Chinese to his grandson, and Joshua assumed he was telling the boy to be less nosey, but the boy spoke back at rapid-fire in his native tongue. His voice was soft as a young woman’s and Joshua wondered again just how old he could be.

  Wisely, he stayed out of the obvious argument.

  They rode into the ranch yard as the sun was moving westward in the sky a few hours’ shy of supper time, but Joshua was sure that Nona would have something to tide them over for a bit.

  Stopping in front of the barn, he offered his arm to the old man, who climbed down off Buck with a great deal more agility than could have been expected for his age.

  “I’ll take the horses, Pa,” Katie offered, as Joshua moved around and practically lifted the boy from behind her saddle.

  “Thank you,” Wen spoke, meeting Joshua’s pale blue gaze. “I will help you, Katie,” he added, dropping his heavy pack in the dust of the yard.

  Chen Lou looked around at the large ranch buildings, the chickens scratching in the yard and the strange little lean-to shack on the far side of the barn where the sound of metal ringing on metal echoed into the afternoon air.

  “You have good place here,” he said, looking at Joshua.

  “I have good people,” Joshua replied. “You come on up to the house and we’ll get you some grub. These two young folks can see to the horses.”

  Chen Lou nodded. “You are kind, Mr. James,” he said, falling into step with the tall cattleman as they headed to the house. “You have five daughters,” he added, more a statement than a question.

  “Yes,” Joshua said, a soft smile playing across his face.

  “I had one daughter,” the old man said, his eyes suddenly sad. “Wen’s mother. She gone now, long time.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.”

  “You never get over losing the one you love, but to live longer than your own child...” his voice faded and he shook his head.

  “I know what you mean.” Joshua thought of Nona and Issy and how they’d had to let their daughter go. He still felt the hole in his heart and couldn’t comprehend how they kept on. His scalp prickled with shame as he thought of how he’d run off, leaving them to tend the girls.

  “We all must deal with loss in our own way,” Chen Lou spoke again. “For me, I bring Wen here to new place, new life. We start over.”

 
“That must have been hard.”

  “Yes, but sometimes to start over is the only thing left to do.”

  Together the men walked up the steps on the front porch of the big ranch house. The wood was beginning to turn gray, giving it a soft, settled appearance.

  “Papa!” Fiona cried, running down the long hall to hug her father. “I’m helping Nona make super.” The little girl smiled, her gray-green gaze taking in the stranger.

  “This is Chen Lou,” Joshua offered, introducing his five-year-old to the man.

  “Is that you, Josh?” Nona’s voice called from the kitchen. “I’ve got coffee and cookies.” Her voice rang clear. “You’d better hurry, though, or Isabella and Alexis will have finished them all.”

  “KATIE?” WEN SPOKE, as he stood holding the reins of the buckskin horse.

  “Yes?”

  “Do you know any secrets?”

  Katie stuck her head over the stall door looking into the dark eyes of her companion.

  “I don’t think so,” she replied honestly.

  “I do.”

  Katie smiled with anticipation; a secret could be fun. “What is it?” she asked eagerly.

  “Well, you know how grandfather introduced me as Wen?”

  “Yes.”

  “That is not my name.”

  Katie peered at the boy across the stall door, her green eyes bright, “Then what’s your name?”

  “You promise you won’t tell?”

  “Yes, I promise.”

  “My name is Sue; Sue Lynn and I am not my grandfather’s grandson.”

  “You aren’t?” Katie’s eyes were wide with surprise.

  “No, I am his granddaughter and I am twenty years old.”

  Katie gaped at the slip of a boy before her in wonder. “They why did he say you’re a boy?” she asked.

  “We were working for the railroad and it was better for me to be seen as a boy there.”

  Katie mulled the notion over in her mind. She didn’t quite understand why a girl would want others to think she was a boy, but she accepted that Chen Lou and Sue Lynn had decided it was for the best.

  “Why are you telling me?” she asked. “I’m just a kid.”

  “Because I like you and I want you to know the truth. You helped us when we were alone.”

  “On the Broken J, we all help each other,” Katie replied seriously. “That’s just the way it is.”

  Sue Lynn smiled. “Good, now where can I get cleaned up? I’d like to introduce myself properly to your whole family.” She smiled brightly, her dark eyes flashing with excitement and determination. “It will be nice not to hide anymore.”

  Chapter 23

  “THERE YOU ARE, KATIE,” Nona said as her granddaughter walked leisurely into the kitchen and picked up a cookie.

  “Where’s our new guest?”

  “Washin’ up,” Katie said with a mischievous smile.

  Chen Lou looked around the room as if expecting his grandson to appear suddenly.

  “Well you go round up your sisters and help set the table, we’ll be eating soon.”

  “Yes Ma’am,” Katie said, still smiling as she walked away.

  “I’m sure you’re very hungry, Mr. Lou,” Nona said, looking the man up and down. “I don’t know what they feed you men on the railroad, but I’ll fatten you up in no time.”

  The other man scowled but said thank you as one by one the other girls came back into the kitchen. There was a willowy girl with dark red hair tinged with copper, then the one that sat with her father who had greeted them at the door.

  Katie returned a few minutes later, holding the hands of two identical mites with dark hair and eyes.

  Chen Lou smiled at the little girls, who smiled back shyly. It was surely a houseful.

  Next, a dark man walked into the kitchen, his cinnamon-colored eyes assessing, but friendly. He was introduced as Isadoro, and by the way, he kissed the older woman at the stove, he was obviously Nona’s husband.

  A bent-backed man came in next, his dark hair showing signs of gray at the temple and his eyes tired with pain. Deeks took a chair as the girls bustled about putting plates and cutlery on the table.

  The settings were simple but good, and the smells coming from the stove were enough to make his stomach grumble.

  A tall, broad-chested man came in next, his blue eyes friendly, if questioning, as he introduced himself as Benjamin Smith.

  Overall, the Broken J seemed to be a ranch overflowing with men and children. Chen scowled again as he looked about for his wayward family member.

  Old Billy came in, followed closely by Walters and Stevens, who introduced themselves politely and took a chair.

  “Right nice ta’ meet ya,” Billy said, taking a seat next to Chen Lou. “I did a bit of time working the railway down along St. Louis a long time ago. Ain’t no easy work.”

  “I did not build the line,” Chen Lou offered. “We only do the service work for others. Cooking, washing.” He bobbed his head as he spoke.

  “You can cook?” Billy asked his gappy smile wide. “I learnt cookin’ along the way too. Seems like a good skill for some old-timers like us. They don’t tend ta run you off if you can keep ‘em fed,” he chortled, slapping Chen Lou on the shoulder and making him smile.

  “I do laundry too,” Chen spoke again proudly. “It not work many men want do for themselves. Keep me in business, very good.”

  Behind him, he heard the back door open and close and a sudden hush fell over the whole kitchen. The loud sound of scraping chairs grated against his jangled nerves as the men at the table stood to their feet.

  Chen Lou groaned. He knew what he would see if he turned to look. Instead, he looked up into the smiling face of Katie, who was the only one who didn’t seem to be shocked or surprised by the new arrival.

  Slowly he turned in his chair, his dark, crinkled eyes taking in the form of his granddaughter dressed in a deep green silk robe and black trousers. Her ebony locks hung loosely to her hips and her dark eyes were locked on the face of the man with the icy blue eyes.

  Joshua blinked at the petite woman standing in his kitchen and suddenly all the pieces fell into place. Somewhere his brain had been scrambling to put together what his eyes unwittingly registered. The boy Wen had been confusing not because of his age, but because he - was really - a she.

  “Ma’am,” he said lamely, only to be rewarded with a bright smile.

  “Mr. James.” She titled her head in acknowledgment, making a silky strand of pitch-black hair slip over her shoulder. “I am sorry about the deception, but if you will allow me, I will explain.” Her eyes never left his face and he had to force himself to reply.

  “Take a seat,” he offered. The room suddenly felt too warm and he gratefully sank back into his chair as the young woman moved to her grandfather’s side and laid a small work-roughened hand on his shoulder.

  “Many years ago, my Ye-ye, grandfather, brought me to this country to leave behind the shame of my heritage. You see, my mother fell in love with an English man and I was the result of that love.”

  The other men had settled themselves back into their chairs, and now the whole family listened intently to the tale.

  “My mother decided that she could not live with the shame or without my father, so when he left to return to his home country, she gave me to Ye-ye and stepped into the beyond.” Her soft eyes took in each little girl seated at the table then returned to Joshua. “I hope you understand?”

  “I think I do,” Joshua said, his throat tight.

  “When we came here, Chen Lou was able to get work in a laundry in San Francisco. Our life was hard but good, and when I was old enough, he taught me to do the work as well. Even then he felt it was safer if people believed I was a boy, so Wen became a member of our family.”

  Chen Lou reached a hand up and placed it over hers where it still rested on his shoulder, his gaze downcast.

  “For many years this worked well and then things changed. One man di
scovered my secret and became relentless in his pursuit of my affections. I was still very young, only fifteen, and wanted nothing to do with him. Ye-ye decided that we must leave and signed on with the rail company. Unfortunately, I was found out again and this time my grandfather and I were dismissed.”

  “Tsk, tsk,” Nona clicked her tongue and shook her head. “It is not right that you cannot work with your grandfather,” she said. “How silly some people are.” She smiled at Sue Lynn, “I am Nona, come we eat.”

  Nona lifted a pot of something from the stove and placed it on the table with a soft thump. “Tonight, we eat chicken and dumplings. It will make us all feel good.”

  After a prayer of thanks, the usual palaver of a ranch dinner proceeded. The girls greeted the newcomers and chattered about their day. The men discussed stock and other issues related to the upcoming drive, and everyone took the time to get to know their guests a little better.

  Joshua was surprised to see Katie walk around the table and sit down next to Sue Lynn without any hesitation at all. She seemed drawn to the small woman somehow.

  BUCK SHIED AND SNORTED as Joshua rode beneath the limbs of a locust tree and he pulled rein to see what had spooked the usually placid horse.

  A bright giggle echoed from the tree's lower limbs and Joshua scowled as Sue Lynne swung down, hanging by her knees, still laughing.

  "You could have killed me," he said, exaggerating the situation just a tad.

  "You look alright to me," Sue replied, still grinning. "Buck is a good horse."

  "What are you doing out here, anyways?" Joshua asked.

  "I have been thinking."

  Joshua pushed Buck closer, letting him stretch out his neck and sniff at the woman's long black hair that hung like a curtain behind her.

  "What about?" His voice was still grumpy, but he was curious.

  "I like this place."

  "This tree?"

  "No," she twisted her lips and crossed her arms even as her face became redder. "I like this place." She stretched her arms wide to encompass the whole of the Broken J lands.