Billy Sure Kid Entrepreneur and the Invisible Inventor

by Luke Sharpe

  Still surprised that bacon, of all things, is an important ingredient in the Invisibility Spray, I fire up my Bunsen burner and start to cook up a load of bacon.

  Tssss! As the bacon begins to sizzle, Philo hops out of his doggy bed and trots over. He paces back and forth in front of my workbench, sniffing and groaning.

  Before I can tell him that the bacon is not for him (not that he’d care even if he understood what I was saying—where is my CAT-DOG TRANSLATOR, anyway?), Philo whips his head around and starts growling.

  “What do you see, boy?” I say, looking in the direction Philo is facing. Still nothing there.

  Then, just as quickly, Philo turns back and starts sniffing at the bacon.

  “Sorry, boy, this bacon is not—”

  And again, Philo turns around quickly and growls.

  “What is up with you?!” I ask.

  Philo turns back to the bacon.

  “No,” I say firmly. I always feel bad when I deny Philo something he wants. Especially food, but this bacon is not for breakfast. It’s a key ingredient in my invention.

  Still, I can’t argue with Philo—it does smell pretty good.

  Philo returns to his doggy bed and I start blending small strips of bacon with the rest of my invisibility formula. When the strange brew has cooked (and my clothes smell like bacon), I’m ready to test my spray.

  But not before Philo hops from his bed, races to a corner of the office, and starts barking.

  “THERE’S NOTHING THERE, PHILO!” I say. What is wrong with my dog?! It looks like his bacon craving has made him a little wacky.

  Then, just as quickly as he started, Philo stops, pauses at my workbench to beg for bacon again, and returns to his bed.

  Sometimes I think that I will never understand dogs.

  Time to test my spray. I line up a water bottle, a book, and a small electric motor. I spray a small amount on each of these items, and accidentally get a little of the spray on my left arm.

  Then I wait . . . and wait . . . probably only a few seconds, but to me, after my previous failures, it feels like hours! And then the water bottle, the book, and motor start to disappear.

  It’s working! I think, as half of each item vanishes.

  Come on, come on . . . here we go. . . .

  I wait for the rest of each object to disappear. But it just doesn’t happen. So here I am with a bottle, a book, and motor that are each HALF-INVISIBLE.

  And that’s when I glance down at my left arm. My elbow has vanished! I can see my upper arm and my shoulder, as well as my lower arm, wrist, and hand. But at the moment these two parts of my arm appear to be DISCONNECTED!

  I gather up the three half-visible objects in my partially visible arms and cross the office to show Manny. As I arrive at his desk, Manny is clicking the send button on the online application for the Definite Devices CFO job.

  “Well, I applied,” he says, his back still facing me. “Now let’s see how long it takes Nat to reply.”

  Manny turns around. “That’s a promising start,” he says, looking at the results of my Invisibility Spray.

  That’s my friend Manny, always the optimist.

  “I have to say, the invisible elbow thing is a bit creepy,” he adds.

  “Yup,” is all I can think of to say. Then I notice something weird on Manny’s desk. “Hey, did you move that photo of us from the time we were on the Better Than Sleeping! TV show? You always keep it right there on your desk, but it’s gone.”

  I know how proud Manny is of that photo, which shows our first big brush with fame. He looks over to the spot on his desk where the photo usually sits. It’s empty.

  “No, I didn’t move it,” he says. “I don’t know what could have happened to it.”

  Manny sticks his head under the table, checking to see if maybe the photo fell on the floor. Nope. It’s nowhere to be seen.

  “Well, that’s weird,” Manny says, then turns back to his laptop.

  I fire up the burners and start cooking a new batch of bacon. I have to get busy fine-tuning my formula. As the bacon sizzles, Philo again comes over, sniffs, and groans. Then he quickly turns.

  “RUUFF RUFFF!”

  He starts barking again into an empty corner of the office.

  I shake my head. Too many weird things going on around here.

  When the bacon is done, I combine the bigger pieces with the rest of the ingredients, which include moss I scraped off a rock, rust from one of Dad’s old hubcaps (or maybe it was one of his old sculptures . . . he’ll never miss it either way), as well as the cream cheese, toothpaste, dried seaweed, and toenail clippings I began with.

  Well, here goes, I think.

  I spray the bottle, book, and motor. The visible parts now disappear.

  YES! IT WORKS! I spray my left shoulder and my left wrist. Both turn invisible! I’m so happy the spray works that I start spraying my hair, my shirt, my pants, and my shoes. In a few seconds I’m completely invisible.

  “It works, Manny!” I cry. “It works!”

  Manny turns and stares at the spot where he heard my voice coming from. “I can’t see you at all, Billy! That’s fantastic!”

  Intrigued, Philo steps from his bed and walks slowly over to me, sniffing as he goes.

  “It’s okay, boy,” I say. “It’s me.”

  I walk around the room, and Philo follows me step for step.

  “You think dogs can see invisible people?” Manny asks.

  And that’s when it hits me. “No, but they can sure smell bacon! That has to be it. The only downside of my Invisibility Spray is that it does kinda make you smell like bacon.”

  “URRRRR . . .” Philo moans.

  “So, how long does the invisibility last?” Manny asks.

  I stop in my tracks. It’s at that moment that I realize that I have absolutely no idea how long I will remain invisible.

  “Um, actually, I don’t really know,” I admit.

  “Is the Anti-Invisibility Spray ready?” Manny asks.

  Another good question. And once again, it is not until Manny asks the question that I realize that it probably would have been a really good idea to have created the Anti-Invisibility Spray before I tested the Invisibility Spray on myself.

  “Um, no,” I admit, slightly embarrassed. “I should work on that now.”

  “Definitely,” Manny says. “By the way, it’s freaky watching you move things around when you’re invisible.”

  Poor Manny—he probably sees a bunch of flying objects!

  I get to work, following the steps to create the formula.

  I start to think about the fun ways I could use this spray. Trick-or-treating on Halloween. No one would see me! They’d only see a bag of candy floating in the air with no one holding it. And I wouldn’t have to worry about a costume. If only Halloween weren’t months away. . . .

  Thankfully it doesn’t take me long to whip up a batch of Anti-Invisibility Spray. I spray the surface of the workbench to make sure I get the bottle, book, and motor—because, of course, I can’t see exactly where they are. All three objects instantly come back into view.

  I then turn the can toward myself and spray. I look down at my hands. A few seconds later they come back into view. Then the rest of my body becomes visible too.

  “I got it!” I say. “And on the first try, too!”

  Manny turns and looks at me. “That’s great,” he says. “But what’s NOT SO GREAT is that Nat Definite has not replied to my application. I thought for sure that since that listing appeared to be written for me, he’d jump right on my application.”

  “You know, Emily did volunteer to help track down Nat Definite,” I point out. “And even if she is only offering because it would count as an ‘Emily being nice’ thing, she is pretty good at searching the Internet.”

  “Worth a try,” says Manny. “I’m certainly not having any luck.”

  I grab the phone and call Emily. “So, remember when you offered to help us find that Nat Definite guy?
Well, we need—”

  “I’D LOVE TO HELP!” Emily screams into the phone, not even letting me finish my sentence and causing me to pull the phone far away from my ear. “As long as this counts as a nice thing I’m doing for you.”

  “Yes, it counts, Emily. I—”

  Too late. She hangs up. A couple minutes later—Sc reeee!—I hear her bike screeching to a halt outside.

  “Hi, guys, help is here,” Emily says, pulling up a chair next to Manny.

  As I clean up the leftover bits and pieces of bacon and toenails, Emily and Manny put their mad geek skills to work, scouring the Internet for Nat Definite.

  I’m just about done when I find a couple of extra pieces of bacon I had missed. Oh, what the heck. He’s been so good. “Philooooooo,” I whisper. “Bacon.”

  Philo bolts from his bed as if he’d been fired from a slingshot and races over. He gobbles down the bacon right from my hand.

  An hour passes and it’s soon time to head home. Emily works hard, using all the tricks she knows to figure out if Nat Definite is a fake name or not, but despite her best efforts, she has no more luck than Manny has had.

  “Sorry, guys, I really did try,” Emily says as we head out of the office. “Let me know if you hear back from Definite Devices, Manny.”

  He nods, then turns back to his laptop.

  Emily is in a bright, bubbly mood as she and I ride our bikes home, side by side. Philo trots happily behind us, still licking his lips, trying to get the last bits of bacony goodness.

  “I already helped Mom with a project, organizing some of her files,” Emily says. “And now I just helped you—even though we didn’t find what we were looking for. So now I only have to do one more nice big thing for Dad and then I’m all set. I’m so close. I’m ALMOST FREE!”

  Oh joy. I can hardly wait to get old Emily back.

  I sleep well that night, satisfied that at least Sure Things, Inc.’s Next Big Thing is ready to go. The next day is Saturday. I look forward to sleeping a little late.

  No such luck.

  My phone rings early. It’s Manny.

  “Are you up?” he asks.

  “I am now,” I reply groggily.

  “You have to check out Right Next Door,” he says, offering no apology for waking me up early on a Saturday morning.

  Before it can dawn on me that Manny would not be calling so early on a Saturday unless it was important, I open my laptop and click on the Right Next Door site.

  There I am greeted by the following eye-opening headline:

  DEFINITE DEVICES ANNOUNCES INVISIBILITY CREAM!

  The Stranger in the Corner

  I REALLY CAN’T believe this! I mean, Manny, Emily, and I can’t even figure out who is behind Definite Devices, and meanwhile they have already:

  • introduced a popular product, the Edible Book, even though Manny is probably right about it not lasting

  • done their best to steal Manny away from Sure Things, Inc.

  • and now, beat us to the market with an invisibility product!

  I just got my spray prototypes to work, which means we’ll need to safety test it and get it for stores, and they’ve already gone public with their INVISIBILITY CREAM! How is this even possible?!

  “Um, Billy, are you there?” Manny says into the phone.

  That’s when I realize I’m so stunned that I haven’t said a word to Manny since I saw that headline.

  “Sorry, the headline really got me,” I say. “Let me read the article.”

  Here’s what it says:

  Want to be invisible like a superhero or a ghost? WANT NO MORE! From the BRILLIANT and FRIENDLY mind of Nat Definite comes Definite Devices’ BEST INVENTION EVER—Invisibility Cream! Did you like the Edible Book? Well, you’re gonna LOVE Definite Devices’ Invisibility Cream. Rub it on . . . and vanish from sight! Sound good? It is good! And, it’s coming soon to a store near you!

  Definite Devices—We’re More Than Sure. We’re Definite!

  I’m still stunned. And, strangely, a little jealous. Who’s going to care about our Invisibility Spray when their cream is just about to hit the stores?

  “Uh, Billy, did you finish the article?” Manny asks.

  Once again I forgot I was even talking to him.

  “Sorry, sorry . . . I don’t even know what to say.”

  “Well, before you say anything, let me tell you . . . that article is not all,” Manny says. “I have some more news. . . .”

  “Okay,” I say, feeling a knot tightening in my stomach.

  “Nat Definite finally e-mailed me back,” Manny explains. “He took the bait. He accepted my application to be Definite Devices’ new CFO.”

  “That’s great!” I say. “Now you can finally learn who he is and what his business operation looks like. This is what we’ve been waiting for.”

  “Well, um, not exactly,” Manny says. “Nat asked to meet with me today, but he wants to meet at the World Headquarters of Sure Things, Inc.”

  This whole thing just keeps getting WEIRDER AND WEIRDER.

  “What?” I reply. “Doesn’t this Nat guy have his own office? I mean, he’s trying to be big time, beat us out and all, and he doesn’t even have his own office? I thought we were going to find out about him. Now he’s going to find out about us!”

  “I’m with you, partner,” says Manny, “but he insisted. He would only agree to interview me if he could come over to our headquarters.”

  “Do you think it’s even worth it to meet with him?” I ask. “Since you’re not infiltrating yet or anything.”

  “Yeah, getting some face time is important,” Manny says. “I’ll do my best to learn everything I can about him and try to figure out what he really wants, even if I have to do it in our own office.”

  And that’s when it hits me. A plan.

  “I have an idea,” I say. “What if I spray myself with the Invisibility Spray before Nat gets there? I can hide in the office and spy on him, just as he’s spying on us!”

  Manny thinks for a second. “I like it,” he says finally. “Think of it as a new PRODUCT FIELD TEST for the Invisibility Spray. Think you can get this plan in motion ASAP? Nat is coming by at two this afternoon.”

  “I’ll get there about one so we can discuss strategy,” I say.

  “And I have an idea that will make it look like I really do want to work for him, without having to give away any secrets about Sure Things, Inc.,” Manny tells me. “See ya.”

  I hang up. Normally, I probably would not get out of bed for another hour or two on a Saturday, but I am wide awake. Today we finally get to learn who NAT DEFINITE is. I get to test my Invisibility Spray “in the field,” as Manny calls it, and maybe we can put this whole Definite Devices mystery behind us.

  Downstairs I find Mom and Dad drinking hot chocolate.

  “Well, look who’s up early on a Saturday,” says Dad. “What’s the occasion?”

  It’s at that moment I realize I have not kept Mom and Dad up to speed on all the Definite Devices stuff. Emily, of course, knows all about it, but she’s still sleeping.

  “I have to meet Manny at the office a little later,” I say. “We have to clean up some business from last week.”

  Don’t get me wrong. I don’t like keeping stuff from my parents, and technically what I told them is true. It’s just too complicated a situation. And one that I really don’t understand yet. So I’d rather wait until I have something definite to tell them. And I do mean “Definite!”

  “Did someone call a family meeting without telling me?” says Emily, who walks slowly down the stairs, rubbing her eyes.

  “Nope,” I say, grabbing a box of cereal from the pantry.

  “I made some TURKEY, KALE, AND BOLOGNA MUFFINS,” Dad says proudly. “They’re right there on the counter.”

  “Thanks,” I say, putting away the cereal, not wanting to hurt Dad’s feelings.

  “Oh,” says Emily, taking a muffin with one hand and the salt shaker full of Gross-to-Good Powd
er in the other. “Anything definite going on, Billy?”

  “As a matter of fact, yes,” I say, shaking some of the powder onto my muffin. “Nat Definite finally reached out to us. We’re going to meet him today.”

  “Who’s Nat Definite?” asks Mom.

  See? Complicated.

  “That is what I’m going to find out today,” I say.

  A little while later, with Philo trotting beside me, I hop on my bike and take off, looking forward to finally getting some answers.

  I arrive at the office with plenty of time to get invisible before Nat arrives. Manny is already here, hard at work on his laptop.

  “Check this out, Billy,” Manny says.

  I lean over his shoulder and stare at a series of financial spreadsheets.

  “I’ve spent the morning creating a fake set of financial reports for Sure Things, Inc.,” he explains, pointing at columns of sales figures, marketing info, and new product ideas, all of which are made up. “This way Nat can see what I do, but we won’t be giving any secrets away to a competitor.”

  “RECHARGEABLE GUM?” I ask, spotting one of the fake inventions that Sure Things, Inc. is supposedly working on.

  “You know, a piece of gum that you could charge up again with flavor,” Manny explains.

  “But why wouldn’t you just eat another piece of gum?” I ask. “Wouldn’t that just be so much easier?”

  “Hey, I was in a hurry,” Many says, smiling.

  That’s Manny, putting the finishing touches onto his spreadsheet. Finally, everything is ready. At about a quarter to two I pull out the prototype can of Invisibility Spray.

  “Okay, here goes,” I say. Then I spray myself head to toe. A few seconds later I VANISH.

  “Can you see me?” I ask.

  “No,” says Manny. “But I can sure smell you.”

  “Smell me?”

  “Well, not you, but the bacon you used in the formula,” Manny explains.

  I raise my invisible hand to my nose and sniff. Manny is right. I can clearly smell bacon. I can see how that might be a drawback for people hoping to remain undetectable while they are invisible. I’ll have to work that out later, and hope that for now, Nat Definite doesn’t have a great sense of smell.