Deepest Desire

by Weston Parker

  "Good girl." He licked at my mouth and lifted up to press in deeper as I let out a long groan. "Come for me, baby." He moved to his knees and gripped my legs, pulling them up as he used long, slow strokes to force me toward orgasm.

  "Oh fuck," I turned my face to the side and gripped the sheets as the world exploded, leaving me to cry out in long screams as my body shook. I'd experienced a few orgasms before, but nothing like this.

  "Hell yeah, Grace." He pressed his body against mine and reached down between the bed and me, cupping my ass and fucking me harder and faster as he tucked his face against my neck. "I'm not gonna last. You're too tight, kitten."

  I love you, sat on the tip of my tongue, but I pursed my lips and held him tightly to me, rubbing his back as he cried out and emptied himself inside of me.

  "So good," I whispered against the side of his face, hoping that he would turn and kiss me.

  "Perfect. You're so damn perfect." He moved up and ran his thumb over my cheek before leaning down and brushing his lips against mine. "Your body belongs to me. No one else touches it. Not ever. You understand?"

  The promise of pain in his eyes mixed with the darkness in his voice scared me a little.

  "I understand." I reached up and touched the side of his handsome face, pulling him into a long kiss. "Stay with me tonight."

  "No, Grace. I want your body, kitten. The rest is too dangerous." He kissed the tip of my nose and rolled off of me, walking to the bathroom and leaving a few minutes later.

  I got what I deserved. I'd danced with the devil, and he'd used me and left.

  And he would again and again and again.

  Chapter 11

  Erik

  I jerked around in my sleep, my skin sticky, my heart racing. My dreams had never been so bad. I wasn't even capable of telling that they were dreams anymore.

  "Where is she?" I glanced around the living room as my father stood over to the side of the room, his arms wrapped around his chest, his skin ghost white.

  "I don't know, son." He brushed his fingers over his mouth and walked out, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

  Delaney was missing, her dolls all over the floor. A splattering of blood covered the floor beside the doll house, leaving me with one conclusion. Someone took her.

  Turning, I jogged out of the room and screamed at my father. My teenage voice wavered as emotions pounded against me.

  "Dad! What the fuck. There's blood on the floor. Where is she?" I screamed as my hands begin to shake.

  He glanced over his shoulder, his demeanor far too calm for the situation.

  "I told you. I don't know." He walked into his office and closed the door as the world grew dark around me.

  Someone had my sister. My sweet little sister who wouldn't hurt a fly or talk down to a flea.

  "Erik?" Her voice was thick as if there were something caught in her throat.

  "Delaney?" I turned and stiffened, my blood running cold. A young girl stood in a body bag, blood and black grime smeared from the inside. I couldn't make out her face, nor would I want to. I'd been there that day they pulled her out of the river.

  There was nothing left but hair, bone, and teeth.

  Bile rose in my throat as my voice broke. "Please don't do this to me. Please."

  "Why didn't you save me? You had two weeks. I was alive for two weeks while they abused me, Erik."

  "Stop!" I covered my hands over my ears as tears burned my eyes. It was a dream. It had to be a fucking nightmare. I turned to run and found myself knee deep in the river just beyond my house, the water icy cold. "No. Please. Fuck."

  Her body bobbed in the water just a few feet from me, her long silky hair matted and tangled. Her little arms were pale with splotches of skin missing.

  "God." I turned and ran out of the water, dropping to my knees as I vomited until my sides hurt. I'd been the one to find her, to first see her dead and decimated. "Please make it stop."

  My voice grew deep, my hands larger and I sat back on my heels. I wasn't a boy anymore, but a man. Had I been the man I was now, she never would have been taken. I could have saved her.

  A cry ripped from my throat, and I dug my hands into the dirt as anguish and disgust rolled over me in thick waves. I had no one left but the ghosts of those I loved and lost.

  "Erik." Soft, wet hands touched the side of my face, and I screamed and jerked up.

  "Fuck. Fuck." I got out of the bed and walked around my room, my body covered in sweat, my heart racing as if it were trying to get out of my chest. I'd had plenty of dreams about my sister over the last ten years, but none so vivid.

  My bedroom door opened and my father walked in. "Erik. What's going on?"

  "Bad dream." I reached for my pillow and covered my nakedness before sitting down on the edge of the bed. "I was there again. At Delaney's death. It was horrible. Disgusting. I hate myself for leaving her that day. I knew something was off, Dad." I glanced up to receive the same stony look I always got from him.

  "There was nothing you could have done. Believe me." He let out a long sigh and glanced around the room. "Why are these dreams fucking with you so much now? Did something happen?"

  "No." I flopped back on the bed. "I'm fine. Seriously. Close the door behind you."

  He did, without another word. I needed to start staying at my own place. My father's house had too many demons, but it was closer to Grace's apartment, and I was so fucking weary the night before after leaving her place.

  Grace.

  Just the thought of her brought a warmth racing through my chest that scared me. I'd never been in love before.

  "And you're not now, pansy-ass." I chucked the pillow and got up to get dressed. She was a pretty set of tits and a fine ass to tap. Period.

  "You almost make my heart stop every time I see you." My voice echoed in my head from the night before. It was the truth, but saying it out loud made it that much more real. I had to walk away. I had to force myself to grow the fuck up. A man like me couldn't have a woman.

  "Or next time you're down in the river, it'll be your girl swimming with the fish just like they did your sister." I ran my hands down my face as fear filled me. I hadn't stopped looking for Delaney's murderer though the cops called it a pre-teen suicide and blamed it on us losing our mother the year before. Nothing could have been farther from the truth, and the part that nagged at my soul was that my father didn't fight, didn't look. He fucking gave up. Why?

  I dressed quickly and walked out into the hallway, making my way down to the large living room near the front of the house. I needed to get my mind off my nightmares and not have it move to me falling in love with Grace.

  I kissed her. Fuck me. I shouldn't have.

  Breaking my own rules meant I was in deep. How it happened, or when it happened was beyond me, but I had to reconcile it. I wasn't a boy anymore, and my lust and desires could fuck off if it meant keeping my girl safe.

  "You look like shit." Kane glanced up from eating something from a bowl. "That you screaming like a bitch down the hallway?"

  "Yeah. Let's have someone take the person that matters most to you, fuck her for weeks, cut her up and dump her remains in the river out by your house and see how you fare." I walked by him and popped the bowl, flipping the cereal all over his lap. "Fuck you too."

  "Erik. Come on, man. I didn't mean any of that. I just-"

  I flipped him off and walked to the breakfast bar in the kitchen, taking a seat. Lizzy was busy making eggs and bacon, the cute Swedish girl glancing over her shoulder and smiling brightly at me.

  "Morning. Want something to eat?" She turned and put a hand on her hip. My father had hired her a few years back, and we all remained respectful to her. She was a good woman... too good to be involved with a depraved bunch like we were.

  "No. I'm good." I ran my fingers through my hair and glanced over at Kane as he walked in. It was hard to ignore the desire in Lizzy's eyes when I was around her, but having Grace front and center in my mind helped. My fat
her would cut off my feet if I touched his staff. I'd lost interest the moment I stepped foot in the library anyway.

  "Dude. I said I was sorry." Kane walked to the sink and tried to wash his shirt and pants off.

  "Something happen?" Lizzy glanced over at me, her long blond hair in a playful ponytail.

  "No. He's just being his usual dickish self. No biggie." I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding and let my animosity go.

  "We got a hit this morning." Kane glanced over his shoulder.

  "We?" I snorted. "Since when do we work together?"

  "It's one of the three guys that took money from your father. I did my research, and none of the assholes have the money to pay him back, so you're up. Grab your gun and let's get going."

  "Fine." I got up, grabbed my gun from my bedroom and met him outside a few minutes later. "Who are these clowns? Did they know they were stealing from us?"

  "Hell no. They're just college idiots." He got into his side of the car and buckled up.

  I took a deep breath, trying to let the stain of my dreams fade before getting in the car beside him. It was going to be a long fucking day having to deal with Kane and ignore Grace.

  ***

  "Dude. I swear we didn't know." The guy couldn't be more than twenty-two or so. "We were in a sticky situation and-"

  "Where's the money, mother fucker?" I lifted my gun as we stood in a back alley in the middle of the day. Getting caught wasn't my concern. Getting finished was.

  "It's gone. We stole it to give it back to someone." His voice broke, and tears spilled onto his cheeks as his jeans darkened from him pissing himself. "Please. I'll get it back."

  "You believe that?" I glanced over at Kane, who was leaning against the brick wall behind us.

  "Nope. Not for a minute. Hurry the fuck up." He gave me a look.

  "Man, please. Just give me some time and I'll-"

  "Time's up." I pulled the trigger and tucked the gun in the back of my jeans, grateful for the invention of the silencer.

  "I'm hungry. Let's eat and then get out of here."

  I looked up at the building we were behind as we walked toward the front. "This place any good?"

  "Let's check it out." He held the door open, and a pretty brunette rushed to greet us and gave us a table. We ate our breakfast in peace for a few minutes until all hell broke loose. Someone found the body. Good.

  I wiped my mouth with my napkin and let out a contented sigh. "You done?"

  "Yeah. That was incredible. We should come here more often."

  "To kill someone or eat?" I got up and threw a fifty on the table.

  "Both?" He snorted, and I popped him in the gut before walking toward the exit. "Hey, man. I'm really sorry about this morning. It was a dick thing to say to you. You know I loved your sister too. I wouldn't-"

  "Shut up about it." I got in the car and glanced over at him. "Women don't survive in our world. My father's tried to tell me that a million times. I've listened until now."

  "Who is she?" He pulled down the mirror above his head and checked his teeth.

  "Just a girl I met in the city."

  "Where?" He glanced over at me.

  "None of your business." I turned out of the parking lot and headed back to the house as my phone rang. Unknown caller.

  "Debt collector?" Kane chuckled.

  "Right." I put the phone to my ear. "Erik Bertinelli."

  "Erik." I knew the voice right away.

  "Demetri DeMarco. How are you, man?" A smile played on the side of my mouth. Not many people understood the life I was forced to live, but the bastard on the phone did. He was the Underboss of the Castaletta Syndicate out of Chicago, and a mean mother fucker.

  "I've been better." He cleared his throat. "We are headed into war with Cooper. I need to know if you and your old man are willing to stand beside us or if you're against us."

  Straight to the chase. It's one of the many reasons I respected him.

  "My father hates Terrance Cooper and has for years. I've no clue why, but it's irrelevant. We'll stand with you and Joe, of course."

  "Good. We're working on a few new things up here. I'd love to have you come up and let me show you." He was offering me goodwill, a favor for standing beside him.

  "New things like what? We have our fingers in just about everything at this point outside of drugs."

  "And that's where your missing a great margin for your bank account, Erik. A new drug just hit the market, and the kids are going wild for it."

  "Zandra?" I smiled as he huffed.

  "Still come sometime soon."

  "After your war maybe. I could use a break from this fucking place." I ran my fingers through my hair as my throat closed up.

  "Something happened?" The concern in his voice was welcomed. He and Joe Castaletta had shown their respects when my mother died and a few months later when we found Delaney's body.

  "No. I just need closure on this shit, and it's been ten years. It's still fucking with me, but whatever. I need to leave it in the past where it belongs."

  "Or dig a little bit and figure out what the fuck happened. If someone killed my sister, Cat, there isn't much I wouldn't do to find out who."

  "And what would you do when you found them, D? Blow their heads off? Would that bring Cat back?"

  "No, but justice would be served. Don't fool yourself, old friend. It feels good to know that you've evened the score. Period."

  "Right. Let me know when or if you need us."

  "Erik. Do you want us to look into Delaney's death? We can without anyone knowing."

  "No. Leave it buried in the past. It's over now, and I have to get past it."

  "You really don't, but I understand. Just know the offer stands."'

  "Thanks." I dropped the call and glanced over to find Kane's eyes wide. "What?"

  "Why didn't you take him up on it? You've been suffering over this shit with your sister for ten fucking years."

  "Because I'm pretty sure knowing would hurt more than not knowing."

  "What? You make no sense." He glanced out the window and made a sound of disgust.

  As much as I wanted to redeem my sister's life, I was pretty sure it would end with me killing the only family I had left.

  My father.

  Chapter 12

  Grace

  I laid in bed for what seemed like forever that morning. My body ached but in a good way. Where I was pissed at myself for letting Erik set the rules for our relationship, some part of me truly believed that he would fall in love over time. If it took me offering up my body when he wanted it for me to bring in him closer, so be it. I wanted him in my bed anyways. It was almost a win-win.

  "Then why does my heart hurt so much." I sat up and rubbed my chest, forcing myself not to think too much about him leaving me the night before. Everything had been so good up to that point.

  A knock at my front door had me yelping. No one ever visited. Ever.

  "Coming." I grabbed a robe and wrapped it around my naked body before walking to the door. There was a small hope deep inside of me that it was him, but I knew better. I opened the door to find my brother bouncing from one foot to the next. "Thomas?"

  "Hey. Can I come in? You wanna go for a jog or grab breakfast or-"

  "Slow down." I reached up and rubbed the side of my head. "I just woke up. Make some coffee and let me change into something."

  "Alright. Yeah. That'll work." My brother blasted past me, half-jogging into the kitchen.

  Something was wrong, but he wasn't going to give up the intel too easily. I walked to my room and changed quickly before making my way back to the kitchen.

  "So, what's going on? You on something? You're bouncing around like you're on speed." I reached up to pull my long hair into a ponytail as I studied him. Where he was hyper, it wasn't an excited hyper, but a nervous one.

  "Well, I have good news and bad news. I'm honestly not sure if they're connected." He was talking a million miles an hour. "You want coff
ee? Cream? Sugar?"

  I walked over and moved behind him, clamping my hands down on his thick shoulders and forcing him to walk toward the kitchen table. "Sit down. You're making me dizzy."

  "I'm sorry." He dropped down into a chair and pressed his hand to his forehead. "We got the money back from our Las Vegas fuck up, but we stole it."

  "What?" My blood ran cold. "You stole twenty thousand dollars?"

  "Yes. Keep your voice down. Your walls are paper thin in here." He gave me a stern look.

  "Right." I walked back into the kitchen to make us both a cup of coffee. "Why didn't you just ask Mom or Dad for the money, Thomas? Nothing good can come of this."

  "I know. So Billy was one of the guys that helped me steal the money, and he was gunned down this morning behind McCaftery's Diner."

  I jerked around to face him. "Gunned down? By who? Because he stole that money? Does that mean that-"

  He lifted his hand, cutting me off. Now I was being frantic. "Stop. I don't know. I just wanted to see you and talk it through. You're the only person in my life that I'd share this shit with."

  "We need to know who killed him and why." I handed Thomas the cup of coffee and sat down. "It can't be related, right? Where did you steal the money from?"

  "From a check cashing place. The old man watching the register was more than happy to unload it and the safe in the floor." He took the coffee, spilling a little of it as his hands shook. "I'm scared to be honest."

  "I would be too." I leaned back in my chair. "Does the guy at the check cashing place know it was you? Did he see your face?"

  "What? No." He rolled his eyes. "We had on masks and shit, Grace. I'm not a total idiot."

  "Oh, you're definitely an idiot." I tapped the table in front of me. "Maybe I can get Jenna to help."

  "Help do what?" He tilted his head to the side a little and studied me, leaving me to feel like an idiot myself.

  "Help find out who owns the check cashing place. Maybe you guys fucked with the wrong people."

  "Doubt it, but whatever. I just need to keep my nose clean and try to steer clear of anything else that might get me into trouble." He glanced up, staring me in the face. "It'll be okay, right?"