by Tanya Mindo
“You told me that I should stop making people special when they’re not. I figured that it was because of Marie… But you said that you didn’t care about that. So what did you mean, Zoe?”
She is stuck on the same spot, unable to say anything. What does Kaito want to hear from her? A confession? Why is he fishing this out of her?
She gulps. “I was drunk, Kaito, okay? Let’s forget about it. I didn’t mean to say that.”
“Are you certain that that was it? That you were just drunk?”
Zoe becomes flushed. How can she escape this? Why did she bother talking to him when she didn’t have an escape route?
She’s so stupid. She isn’t ready!
“What do you want me to say, Kaito?”
Kaito flinches. Because he actually doesn't know what he wants to hear from Zoe. Does he want her to confirm his suspicions? That she dislikes the fact that he hurt Marie? That maybe she is jealous?
Is he making the same mistake again?
Kaito feels shame crawling into his skin. He becomes angry at himself for being selfish. He doesn’t need to hear anything from her. He doesn’t have any right to demand answers.
He likes her, but he isn’t brave enough to take responsibility.
Kaito looks away and smiles wryly.
“Nothing, Zoe. Sorry. Yes, you were drunk. And you don’t care about what happened with Marie and that shouldn’t mean anything else. That’s how it should be anyway.”
He shakes his head.
“I’m overthinking things, aren’t I?”
“Y-Yeah. It’s cool, Kaito.”
She flicks her eyes toward him. He grimaces.
“Kaito? You okay?”
“Yes,” he says flatly. “Anyway, I’m going up now. Gotta catch some rest.”
Then he walks past by her. He doesn’t look back like he used to. Zoe watches his shadow fade away as he ascends the stairs.
What happened? How did things become this awkward with Kaito?
She scowls at herself and lightly taps her fingers on her mouth.
It’s because of this stupid mouth! Stupid!
Kaito sits in front of his desk, propping his face with his fist.
Nothing more was said between him and Zoe, but he knows that something changed between them. He can’t remember when it started. All he knows is that he wants to go back to how it used to be.
When he didn’t like her.
But it didn’t take him too much time. She caught his attention ever since he saw her at the bus stop.
He was kidding himself when he said that he wasn’t interested. He only noticed the necklace on her neck, so he knew that he should step back. And he did.
I didn’t cross any line, did I?
But even if he did, Zoe liked someone else.
Marie asked him earlier if he was sure. A slight anticipation rekindles in his heart, a tiny hope that maybe he is wrong. That she… Maybe she…
Kaito sighs. He stands up from the chair and looks out the window. He lays his eyes on the tree which used to be covered by pink cherry blossom flowers. He remembers the night they stood under that tree and talked.
“But what could I offer her?”
Kaito didn’t see Zoe the next few days. He didn’t see her at the grocery store. She didn’t send any messages on the group chat. Nothing.
And he missed her.
He was tempted to text her. To ask how she was doing. In the end, he couldn’t press ‘send’. He was still unsure of what to say to her.
Monday finally came.
They are not supposed to go to school together, but their afternoon classes will both end at 4 PM, which means that they can go home at the same time. Unless she has plans. That is unlikely. Her plans are also his plans since they belong to the same group of friends.
He takes a sip from his cup of coffee. It tastes bitter. He pours the rest on the sink and washes the cup.
Kaito leaves the dorm, hopeful to finally fix whatever went wrong between them.
In class, Kaito keeps on glancing at his watch. Zoe’s class is in the same building. It is the reason why they often went home together on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.
Ten more minutes.
It feels like forever.
“Okay, see you next meeting,” the professor finally says.
Kaito immediately packs all his things and walks out. He paces toward Zoe’s classroom, his heart banging against his chest.
The door swings open, and students come out one by one. He eagerly waits for Zoe, who appears a few seconds later.
“Oh, hi, Kaito.”
Zoe smiles at him cheerily.
“Hey,” he says. “Let’s go home?”
“Sorry, I can’t go home with you today.”
Then there is the pang of disappointment.
“O-Oh, you have plans?”
“Yes,” she answers giddily.
The two of them start walking to the station. Sadness sinks into his heart, but he tries to conceal it.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to Shinjuku. We’re going to check the garden and just walk around to shop.”
“We?” he reiterates. “Do you have plans with Jesse—”
“Oh, sorry, Kaito. Just a sec!”
Zoe suddenly dashes away from him.
The girl is slim with a bob haircut. She is wearing a yellow summer dress and black flats. Then Kaito’s gaze falls on the guy next to her. He is tall, even taller than him, and his arms are a little buff. He wears a V-neck white shirt and black pants. The two of them smile at Zoe. Zoe jumps and embraces the girl. Then she also gives the guy a short but tight hug.
Kaito feels his chest constrict. He knows who they are.
Then Zoe turns to his direction and calls him, “Kaito!”
Kaito reluctantly walks toward them, his eyes not meeting the guy’s gaze. He can feel him staring at him, though. As if he’s sizing him up.
Kaito stops a meter away from them.
“Elle, Seth, this is Kaito. Kaito, these are Elle and Seth. My best friends.”
But he knows Seth isn’t her best friend.
“Hey, nice to meet you,” Elle says, offering her hand to him. He shakes it.
“Nice to meet you, too,” he answers.
“I’ve heard so much about you,” Seth says, his tone low but polite. He also shakes his hand.
“Same here,” he replies.
Kaito feels a swirl of emotions all at once. Sadness, confusion, jealousy… He can’t shake it off. But he hides it well. He’s always been good at hiding what he truly feels.
“We’re going now, Kaito,” Zoe says, grabbing Elle's hand. She is happy to see them.
Kaito grins at Zoe, at Elle, then at Seth.
“Okay, have fun,” he responds then waves his hand.
“See ya!” Elle tells him.
The three of them begin walking away. Seth throws him a last casual look, then he smirks.
Kaito’s insides burn, though he suppresses a wince.
Zoe talks to them about something, and the two laugh. Then Seth puts his hand on Zoe’s shoulder as they ascend the stairs to the train station.
Kaito clenches his fists, but he lets it go. He should have expected this.
Zoe and her friends finally disappear from his line of sight. He stands on the same ground, his feet heavy. He smiles despite himself.
“Then that was it. Over before it even started… And she’s back to where she belongs.”
About The Author
Tanya Mindo
is a Filipino who is now residing in Alberta, Canada. She writes romance novels as a hobby. This book is inspired by her own experiences as an exchange student in Japan.
If you’re interested in reading what happens next, please express your support by sending an e-mail to the author at [email protected].
Books By This Author
What's for Breakfast?
Samantha Sandoval is a successful interior designer
living a comfortable life with her older brother, Patrick. She's 26 and financially stable; however, she sucks at dating. She has never had a boyfriend, and her recent blind dates hinted that she might stay single forever. Until Derek Crisanto, Patrick's best friend, comes home and decides to stay with her while Patrick is away.
He's a bully, a playboy, and an extraordinary cook. Sam has considered Derek her enemy ever since, but him being hotter than before is something she can't deny. She wants him gone. She wants to stay the way they were before. But can she resist the guy who knows that the way to a woman's heart is through her stomach?
