To Have the Doctor's Baby

by Teresa Southwick

  “Whatever you say.” The words were practiced, a standard response that indicated he was employing his finely tuned coping skills.

  “I don’t blame you for not trusting me. And that’s okay. I bailed on you once before. As you said, there’s a price to be paid for our choices and this is mine. But in time you’ll see that I’m not going anywhere.”

  He ran his fingers through his hair and he got that look in his eyes. The same one he had when talking about how his brother died. “What makes you think I won’t bail on you?”

  “Because I know what kind of man you are. I believe in you.”

  There were doubts in his mind. She could almost see him ticking them off. But before she could go there, a man walked into the room. He had dark hair, gray eyes and was wearing scrubs. He looked tired, too.

  Instantly, Marilyn and David stood and walked over to him. Nick straightened away from the wall, and before anyone else could ask he said, “Jake, how’d the surgery go? How’s Jonathan?”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Nick felt Ryleigh move close; then her fingers slipped into his hand and squeezed. When Jake smiled, relief edged through him.

  The surgeon looked at Marilyn who had her arm around David’s shoulders. “Your son is going to be fine. I repaired a laceration in his liver. He lost some blood and will be sore, but the organ is one of the most resilient in the body. He’s young and strong—”

  “And strong-willed,” Nick added.

  “That’s good.” Jake nodded. “His prognosis is excellent. Barring unforeseen complications, he should be good as new.”

  “Oh, thank God.” Marilyn put a trembling hand to her mouth, then squeezed her son. “When he’s recuperated, I’m grounding him for the rest of his life.”

  “I’m sure he’s learned a lesson,” Jake said.

  “When can we see him?”

  “He’s in recovery and should be waking up soon. There’s a waiting room right outside. I’ll have one of the nurses bring you in when he’s ready.”

  “Thank you, Doctor. The words seem so inadequate, but I’ve never meant them more in my life.”

  “You’re welcome. I’ll see you in a few minutes.” Jake nodded, then walked out.

  Nick gave Ryleigh’s fingers a squeeze before letting her go so David could give him a high five. Then the boy threw himself into Nick’s arms.

  “Thanks.” Emotion was thick in his voice.

  A lump in his own throat, Nick cupped the back of his head before ruffling the kid’s hair. “For what?”

  “Being here.” David looked up, tears in his eyes. “I just knew it would be okay when you came.”

  “Dr. Andrews is the man of the hour.”

  “Yeah, he did good. But you—”

  “David’s right. You kept us steady. Sometimes his asthma flares up when he’s anxious, but that didn’t happen.” Marilyn hugged him. “You didn’t have to, but I knew you’d come. That made all the difference. I could be strong for both my boys.”

  “I’m glad.” He watched them walk to the waiting room doorway. “I’ll check in on you guys in a little while.”

  She nodded. Then they were gone and he was alone with Ryleigh.

  When Nick looked at her, she was brushing away the moisture on her cheeks. “Are you crying?”

  “I love happy endings.” Her voice trembled with emotion. “And you, Doctor, are such a knight in shining armor.”

  “But I didn’t do anything,” he insisted.

  “You simply cared. The merits of that in terms of that medical benefit can’t be quantified.” The last word came out through a yawn she couldn’t hold back. “Sorry.”

  “That’s it. Time for you to stand down.” There were circles under her eyes, giving her a fragile look that made him want to wrap her in his arms and keep her safe.

  “Okay,” she said. “If you’re sure you don’t need me.”

  Of course he needed her. That was the hell of it. He hadn’t really understood how much he needed her until she was gone. And she’d gone because he pushed her away.

  Something shifted between them; he could feel it. But hope didn’t come easily to him. In spite of the sincere speech about loving him and sticking around, he always prepared for the worst, in this case, the worst being that he was losing her all over again.

  “Go get some rest.”

  “Okay.” She stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek, then left the waiting room.

  Nick was alone. He should be used to it, but Ryleigh had changed that. The fragrance she’d left behind seemed to mock him. So he would do what he always did. Hide behind work. On his way to the recovery room he rounded a corner and almost literally ran into Carlton Gallagher. The other guy was in jeans and a black T-shirt, and had a stethoscope draped around his neck.

  “Nick? What are you doing here? Did I get the call schedule screwed up?”

  “No. The answering service passed on a message from Marilyn Matthews that Jonathan Negri was here and needed surgery.”

  “What? Why?”

  “An accident. As scores go, it’s car one, boy on bike nothing.” Nick added, “He’s in recovery now. Jake Andrews says he’ll be fine.”

  Gallagher looked more and more surprised, clearly understanding that Nick wasn’t there to treat a medical emergency. “I say again, what are you doing here?”

  Nick rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “You first.”

  “I’m looking in on a patient who came into pediatric emergency. He’s got bilateral pneumonia and I wanted to make sure they get his temp down.”

  “Always going the extra mile.”

  Gallagher looked irritated. Or tired. Or both. “Okay, Nick, I know we have a philosophical difference regarding the emotional component in practicing medicine. We tried working together and it didn’t work. Maybe we should just give it up. No hard feelings.”

  “Not so fast.”

  “Why not?” The other man scowled, a change from the easygoing doctor. “I’m letting you off the hook. No harm, no foul. I’ll bow out gracefully.”

  “I’d rather you didn’t.”

  “Look, it’s late and I’m in no mood for jokes.”

  “I’ve never been more serious.” Nick smiled. “And that’s saying a lot for me.”

  “I don’t understand.” Carlton leaned against the wall. He was definitely tired. There was a lot of that going around.

  “You have an interesting style and I could learn a lot from you.”

  “Like what?”

  Nick folded his arms over his chest. “For starters, there’s a portion of practicing medicine that isn’t about tests, treatment and prescriptions. It’s about heart.”

  The other man smiled slowly. “I couldn’t agree more.”

  “Sounds to me like a good start for a medical partnership. You’re just the guy I need and I don’t want to lose you because I’ve been a pigheaded ass.”

  “I couldn’t agree more.”

  Nick laughed. “I’ll have my lawyer draw up a contract. Welcome to the practice, Doctor.”

  Gallagher held out his hand, and they sealed the deal, then resumed walking toward the recovery room.

  “So,” Carlton said, “to what do I owe this change of heart?”

  “You can’t change a heart when you don’t have one.”

  “That’s bull. Something’s going on with you, and if I had to guess, I’d say it’s Ryleigh.”

  “Don’t go there,” Nick warned.

  “Can’t help it. I’m wired that way. You better get used to it. Unless you want to take back the partnership offer.”

  “No.”

  “Then what’s up with you and Ryleigh?”

  Besides his bargain to get her pregnant and failing? Too much information. But the guy was into feelings and had seen through his. It was easier not to deny it. “We’re just going through a thing.”

  “A thing?” Gallagher gave him a look. “A thing as in you really like her?”

  “Maybe.”

/>   “You’re not so good with words, are you?”

  Nick shrugged. “It’s a flaw.”

  “I couldn’t agree more.” Gallagher grinned.

  “I’m working on it.”

  “Then start by telling her how you feel.”

  “I messed up when we were married.” Nick remembered a mother’s emotional gratitude just a while ago when she’d said words were inadequate. He knew exactly what she meant. Ry had said she loved him, but that didn’t mean she would ever be his. “It’s not likely she’ll trust me again.”

  “Meaning you’re afraid to put yourself out there again.”

  “You know, Carlton, career trajectory in a medical practice could be aborted when you call the senior partner a coward.”

  “Yeah. I’m really scared.” His tone said just the opposite. “The thing is she cares about you and you care about her.”

  A lot of people who supposedly cared about him had disappeared. “How do you know that, and what’s your point?”

  “I could tell the first time I met her and you wanted to rip my head off.” He held up his hand to ward off the protest. “You were jealous as hell. The point is you need to bare your soul to the lady.”

  “You did not really just say that to me.”

  “Yeah. I did. And here’s why. We’re pulmonologists. We treat kids with chronic lung problems, not only in a crisis, but to help them manage diseases in a way that will preserve organ function. We do that to give them the best possible quality of life. Same with you.”

  “I don’t get it.”

  “Then let me connect the dots,” Carlton said patiently. “You’re going through the motions of living. Unless you’re honest with her, you’ve only got half a life.” He stopped at the double doors to the recovery room. “For what it’s worth that’s my diagnosis and treatment. I’m going to check on Jonathan. You coming?”

  “In a minute.”

  The other man pushed through the doors, but Nick held back. He hated like hell to admit it, but his new partner was right. To get what he wanted, he had to let go of his control and let Ryleigh in. It was a risk, but to not take it would mean he’d lose her for sure.

  His professional life was falling into place with a new associate to share the load. It was just a bonus that Dr. Gallagher was a pretty good judge of character and had a knack for connecting dots.

  He’d booted Nick in the ass and made him face what he’d known the minute he saw Ryleigh again. She was the only woman he had ever wanted. He’d been a pigheaded jerk and let her get away once, but no one, not even Gallagher, could say he didn’t learn from his mistakes.

  “You look terrible.”

  “Thank you so much,” Ryleigh said. The next morning she sat across a hospital cafeteria table from her friend Avery. “It’s really a confidence boost to start your day knowing you look like something the cat yakked up.”

  “That’s not what I meant and you know it. Someone got up on the crabby side of the bed this morning. Premenstrual tension?”

  “Probably.” Ryleigh looked down at the dry English muffin and orange juice on her tray and her stomach did an unhappy little clench.

  Avery didn’t miss the reaction. “Are you feeling all right?”

  “Yeah. A little tired. I was here at the hospital kind of late last night with Nick.”

  “Something wrong?”

  “Not with us. Just the usual. He won’t let himself love me, but that’s not news.” She sighed and willed herself not to be a whiner. “A patient of his, actually the younger brother of his patient, was hit by a car when he was on his bike.”

  Avery looked concerned. “How is he?”

  “Doing fine. The trauma surgeon fixed him up and he’s going to make a full recovery. I’m sure between now and the time he’s a grown man, his mother will spend a fortune on hair product to cover the gray.”

  “Sounds like it. But—” Avery looked puzzled. “That’s not Nick’s specialty. Why was he here?”

  “Nick came to emotionally support the asthmatic older brother who is his patient. And I came to support Nick.”

  Avery speared a piece of melon from her fruit salad, then popped it in her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. “That’s different for him, isn’t it?”

  “What?”

  “Well, from what you told me, he keeps an emotional distance from everyone, including his patients. He’s like a car mechanic, only with people, little people.”

  “It’s a fact that children are not small adults and can’t be medically treated the same.”

  “I know.” Avery chewed and swallowed a strawberry before continuing. “What I’m saying is that when a car breaks down, the mechanic fixes the problem. But it’s a car so there’s no emotion involved. According to you, Nick never turned his back when needed, but always holds his emotions in check. He fixes kids and is an awesome doctor who acts like a mechanic.”

  “I’m not sure it’s an appropriate comparison, but essentially you’re right.” Ryleigh broke off a piece of dry muffin and rolled it between her fingers. “There was no medical reason for him to be here last night. It was all emotion. Something about the two brothers got to him.”

  “So something is changing with him. Any ideas what’s going on?”

  “Well, I told him I was in love with him.”

  Avery’s eyes widened. “That could start a chain reaction with the potential for emotional growth. It reminds me of the lyrics from a song…you know the one about how the two people are not really friends, but then one changes when the other least expects it….”

  “Not likely in our case. I told Nick that he didn’t have to follow through on the baby bargain and I’d still always be there for him. It doesn’t matter that he can’t love me back.”

  “That explains why you were here with him last night.”

  “Exactly.” Ryleigh dropped the mangled piece of muffin on her plate.

  “What time did you get back to his place?”

  “Actually I stayed at my apartment because it’s two minutes from the hospital and I was pretty tired. It was about eleven-thirty. Why?”

  “Because you’ve got dark circles under your eyes and that’s not really so late.” Avery studied the mutilated English muffin and orange juice. “Where’s your coffee? You never met a cup you didn’t like.”

  “It just didn’t sound good.” Ryleigh made a face. “The smell of it when I walked in here made my stomach turn.”

  “Oh my.”

  There was some kind of aha-I’ve-got-it expression on her friend’s face, but Ryleigh was clueless. “What?”

  “You’re pregnant.”

  Ryleigh froze and stared. Then she vehemently shook her head. “No way.”

  “What no way? You’ve been having unprotected sex with Nick Damian.”

  Ryleigh shushed her, then looked around at the sprinkling of hospital employees occupying nearby tables. “Say it a little louder. I don’t think they heard you on the other side of the room.”

  Avery bent closer and in a voice barely above a whisper said, “Have you or have you not been sleeping with Nick?”

  “Yes. But when we were last together I wasn’t ovulating. We just barely missed my fertile time.”

  “And you knew this when you slept with him?”

  “Yes.”

  “So it was just because—”

  “I wanted to. Yes,” Ryleigh confirmed.

  “How do you know you missed ovulation?”

  “My email alert said so.”

  “When charting one’s fertility online, one must expect a margin of error.” Avery looked skeptical; then she looked annoyed. “What’s he doing here?”

  Looking over her shoulder, Ryleigh followed her friend’s gaze and saw Spencer Stone, Mercy Medical Center’s foremost cardiac specialist and target of panty-throwing groupies. She started to wave him over, and Avery hissed a warning.

  “No. That man is the bane of my existence.” She hunched down, trying to make herself smaller. “
What’s he doing slumming in the cafeteria instead of meeting his peers in the doctor’s dining room?”

  “Maybe he’s looking for you.”

  The man had dark blond hair and piercing green eyes. He was tall and broad-shouldered, a football player’s build.

  “I wonder if he would be interested in having a baby.”

  Avery looked horrified. “Bite your tongue. You’re in love with Nick. And Spencer Stoneheart still thinks he’s the big man on campus females cannot say no to.”

  “But you say no on a regular basis. Good thing you’re around to give him balance,” Ryleigh said.

  “I’m not going to be around.” Avery watched the doctor leave, then stood. “I’m going to hide. Before I do, I have a suggestion.”

  “Which is?”

  “If I were you, I’d do a pregnancy test.”

  The next morning Ryleigh stared at the test stick. She’d left a message on Nick’s voice mail that she was spending another night at her apartment because she had things to do there. It wasn’t a lie. Avery had put doubts in her mind and before she saw Nick again, she wanted to know for sure.

  And now she did.

  She left the test stick on the bathroom counter, went to the living room and sat on the horrid couch. Her state of shock had nothing to do with the hideously decorated apartment and everything to do with the test. Before doing it, she’d carefully studied the instructions. She’d waited until morning, the optimum time for accuracy and memorized all the factors that could cause a false negative. She’d been prepared for that. She’d already seen the minus and knew how disappointment felt. Nick had been there to cheer her up.

  This time she didn’t need cheering up. Or maybe she did.

  “Pregnant,” she whispered.

  She was having Nick’s baby, a child conceived in love. At least for her. Him? Not so much. And that’s when the tears started.

  “Oh, for crying out loud,” she said, swiping at her cheeks.