I figured I should go pee before I got my beer since I didn’t know how long the wait would be to the restroom. I walked around the corner, noticing the long line for the bar bathrooms, so I quickly made my way out to one of the porta-potties set up over by one line of barriers.
I used the facility as quickly as I could, availing myself of the hand sanitizer and flinging the door open to go get another beer and return to my brothers. As I rushed out of the door, I ran smack dab into a solid wall of leather with a patch that read “Reaper” right at my lips. I tried to step back and apologize, but felt my smile melt away and my vision go cloudy as I looked into the same crystal-blue eyes that had haunted my dreams for the last three years. The same eyes I looked into every morning in my little girl’s face. I started to shake and my knees buckled underneath me as the music and laughter became muffled and slipped away.
I walked over to bring Hacker his beer. He’d asked me to grab him another when I went to get my own. He introduced me to his old high school running buddy, Sam. I liked Sam straight off. He seemed like a cool fucking dude, and I stuck around while Sam and Hacker shot the shit telling tales of their glory days on the football field. I had played football in school as well, but after my experiences over the last several years, it seemed like a lifetime ago.
I was scanning the crowd, trying to account for all of my brothers and, in my mind, ensuring their safety. Of course I noticed the curly blonde dancing almost immediately. It’s not her, I told myself right off the bat. I wasn’t going through that same shit again. Of course, that didn’t mean I couldn’t admire her long, tan legs topped by some short frayed denim shorts that sat low on her hips and a snug peach-colored tank top that accented the swell of her magnificent tits. Fucking A, I could imagine her bent over while I reached around and squeezed those tits in my hands as I pounded the shit out of her. Yeah, she would work as a fill-in for my memories tonight, I thought with a slow predatory smile.
Blondie looked like the chick Hacker was talking to earlier today at Fareway, but I wasn’t sure. Wished I had gotten a better look at her. Hmmmm, if so, maybe he could give me the hook-up.
That’s when her dickhead boyfriend came grinding up on her. Figures someone like her would be with a pretty boy douche like that. I saw her look over her shoulder at him, grinding and swaying against him. Crazy thing was, after she looked my way, I could have sworn she was dancing for me.
Jesus. What. The. Fuck. I felt my cock jump in my jeans. Little fucking tease.
I watched as she ran her hands along her body in a sensual dance. She held her hair up over her head, raising those glorious tits up like an offering. Damn, she reminded me of my angel, but I knew it was an illusion of the flashing colored lights from the stage and the same trick my eyes always played on me. Jesus, I couldn’t take it anymore. Trying to discreetly adjust my wayward cock, I turned around and walked off to find someone who could help with the ache in my balls since it wasn’t going to be her. The thought of that preppy puke with his hands, mouth, and cock on her tonight just plain pissed me the fuck off.
What was up with that? I shook my head.
Hollywood intercepted my prowl around the crowd, pestering me to play a game of darts with him. Pops and Jean had a row of them set up along the side of the bar for the night, and we headed over to wait for one to open. I figured fuck it, it was as good a distraction as any from the sex kitten on the dance floor. There was plenty of time to find a willing chick for the night. We stood by a tall table, drinking our beer and talking about a lot of nothing.
Damn, were any of these fuckers gonna finish their games?
“Bro, I gotta piss. If one of them finishes, grab the fucking board. I’ll be back in a few, unless I find me some warm legs to wear as a belt.” I laughed as I headed over to the porta-johns along the barrier between the bar and the building across the street. After pissing, I walked out of my john and turned to head back to Hollywood, but the door on the john next to me flew open and a sweet-smelling blonde chick slammed into me, smashing her face into my cut. I steadied her by the arms as she pulled back, and I realized it was Sex Kitten. As her smiling gaze raised to mine, her apology died on her lips and I saw her face go white, her smile fade, and those eyes that had kept me going through mortar blasts, sniper missions, and the IED went wide and unfocused before her knees buckled.
I grabbed the body that was etched in my mind and lived under my skin and scooped her up, carrying her over to an empty table off to the side of the street. My heart felt like it was going to explode as one beat melded to the next in a rapid-fire succession. I was finding it hard to breathe as I smoothed her hair back from her brow, flicking the few strands back that were plastered to her forehead with sweat. My fucking hands shook for Christ’s sake. I didn’t know what the fuck I had done in this shitty world, for whatever God existed, to drop this angel in my lap… almost literally… but I couldn’t help the thoughts that raced through my head swearing to never let her go again.
AS I FELT MYSELF regain consciousness, the music, laughter, and blended voices pounded in my ears. I felt myself cradled next to a firm body with my face pressed against leather. And was that a…? Oh God, please tell me that wasn’t a hard penis under my ass. I thought I might die. Then the visual of those eyes flashed back through my mind. I raised my gaze to skim up the leather vest, up the thick column of his neck, over the scruff of a beard, firm lips, and a noble chiseled nose, finally resting on those blue, blue eyes. It couldn’t be. I raised my hand to cup his cheek.
“Colton?”
Those lips curved into a half smile and the gravity of the situation came crashing down on me. I scrambled out of his lap to a standing position. My breath coming in ragged gasps, I held my hands to my chest, trying to gain some semblance of order to my heartbeat and respirations. Oh my God. Oh my God! Oh my God!
“Colton! Oh God, it is you! But how? Here? How? Why are you…?” I couldn’t get my brain and mouth to communicate to form a complete sentence as my brain ran in circles.
Holy shit.
Oh my God.
How the hell did I even begin to explain? I tried again to regain my composure, but that was easier said than done.
“Don’t. Not yet,” he groaned as he stood, framing my face with his strong, calloused hands and lowered his lips to mine in a wild and frantic kiss. I placed my hands over his with the intent to break his hold on me and end the kiss, but my body betrayed me as I felt my breasts press into his chest and my mouth open in subservience to the thrash of his tongue. I heard a moan that I soon realized came from my unrestrained body as my hands moved to his face. I felt the faint ridge of a scar on his left cheek, and I briefly wondered what had happened before all thought escaped me. As I leaned my body further into his, I also felt the hard ridge in his pants pressing against my pubic bone, and I was now certain of what I was feeling. A tingling, pulse began between my legs as he pressed his hardened member against me firmly and our kiss deepened as his mouth ravaged mine in a desperate plea for more.
We broke free, gasping for breath, his forehead braced against mine as we looked deeply into each other’s eyes. My lips were swollen from the bruising kiss, but I wanted him to kiss me again. With every breath I took, I felt my nipples raise and graze against his chest, driving me insane. He reached down, grabbing my ass. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he walked around the back of the bar, entering through the back screen door and taking the first left after the screen slammed behind us. He kicked a door shut and reached back with one hand, turning the lock. He allowed me to slide down his body, catching on the tip of his cock encased in his jeans. He closed his eyes briefly and captured my mouth with his again as we tore at each other’s clothes. I was vaguely aware of being in an office of sorts, lit by a small lamp on the desk, spreading a golden glow across the room and casting the corners of the small room in shadow.
Within seconds, we were stripped naked and I felt the firm contours of his body melding perfectly with my soft c
urves. He laid me down on a small cot with a thick, soft blanket spread neatly over it and my head met the pillow. He ran his gaze reverently over my body, and I couldn’t help covering my breasts with one arm and my mound with the other in what now seemed misplaced modesty. I knew my body wasn’t as taught or lithe as it was three years ago, and even though they were barely noticeable, my stretch marks made me feel ugly.
“No. Don’t ever hide your body from me.” He touched my face gently and leaned over to nip, kiss, and suck along my neck and shoulder. His short beard scrapped my sensitive skin in an incredibly erotic way, causing me to break out in goose bumps. I felt him reach over to the floor, rustling around for something. A plastic wrapper crinkled as he briefly took his lips from my skin. I watched as he raised up to roll the condom over his thick, pulsing cock. Then he looked in my eyes with an unspoken question as he waited for my answer, poised at the edge of my slick entrance.
“Yes. Jesus, Colton, yes.”
“Thank fuck, because I honestly don’t know if I could hold myself back from you.” He briefly slid the tip back and forth in my slickness before plunging into my core, filling me to the point where it bordered on pain as he stretched me to accommodate his girth. My head tipped back as I closed my eyes and hissed in a deep breath through clenched teeth. He held himself still, and I opened my eyes to see his head bowed, his eyes closed, and his muscles straining for control. His eyes opened and met mine.
“Oh my God, baby, you are so tight. Am I hurting you?” I shook my head no, breathing erratically. “I don’t know if I can hold off for long. I’ve lived out this moment for the last three years.” His voice rasped with emotion.
“Then don’t hold back. You won’t break me,” I whispered.
With a pained expression and a rushed exhalation, he stroked in and out of my wet sheath in a frenzy of movement. I could feel the familiar tingle and throbbing of my climax building. I dug my nails into his shoulders and wrapped my legs tightly around his as I grasped at him in an attempt to ground myself before my body shattered and flew away in a million pieces. I floated aimlessly above the earth before I gathered back together underneath him.
He stroked deep into me a few more times before I felt him swell even more. He finally slammed deep into me as he roared. “Yesssssss!”
Then he collapsed down on me before he slid his weight to the side, pulling off the condom and tossing it in the trash. He pulled me over so I lay with my cheek against his chest and one arm and one leg lying across his body while the other was tucked up next to his warmth. We both were breathing deeply, and I could hear his heart pounding under my ear as I listened to his breath become even and slow as we dozed off in a tangle of sweat-slicked limbs.
I awoke with a start a few minutes later, and his arm reflexively tightened around me, but I could tell by his breathing he still slept. Oh my God, what had I done? I hadn’t seen this man in three years and I just had sex with him in a bar office. It was confirmed. This man made me into the biggest slut that walked. He sucked the brains God gave me right out of my dang head! I felt mortified at my behavior as I carefully extricated myself from his limbs and climbed off the cot, searching for my clothes that were scattered across the floor. I found my bra dangling from the corner of a shelf.
Nice.
I quickly dressed and took a minute to study him as he lay sleeping. He looked so peaceful and sweet with his dark, thick lashes fanned across his cheeks. His body that of a sculpted Adonis, he was truly a beautiful man. Just looking at him made me want to crawl right alongside him again and plaster my soft curves against his rock-hard contours.
Shit, shit, shit.
I just stripped down and screwed him without even telling him about his daughter. Dropping my head in shame, I covered my face with my hands. I hadn’t had sex since the last time with him three years ago, but it was like all my inhibitions flew out the window when our bodies were close. My sense of control completely dissipated when he came close to my airspace.
Biting my lower lip, I stood there trying to think. I needed to get away from here so I could clear my head. There was so much to tell him, but I had to gather my thoughts first. At least I knew how to get a hold of him. I fumbled through his jeans and found his phone. When I swiped his screen open, I almost passed out. My heart raced and my lungs struggled to fill with air. Staring back at me was the picture I had taken on his phone on our first night together. It was a different phone, so not only had he saved it from one phone to another, but he intentionally saved us as his home screen.
My mind didn’t know what to do with this unexpected knowledge. My brain felt like it was a reeling blob of mush. Taking a deep breath, I called my phone from his, silencing my phone before the ringing could wake him. I then sent him a text as I set his phone back on his jeans and quietly unlocked and opened the door, closing it with a soft click.
Me: Colton. This is my number. We need to talk, but I need some time to gather my thoughts. I’ll be in touch soon - Steph
I woke stiff and cold as I realized she was gone. I sat up quickly, throwing my feet to the floor and looking around in confusion. Where the hell did she go?
When I realized her clothes were gone, I frantically started to dress, stuffing my phone in my pocket and pulling on my boots. I raced out the door with the side zippers of my boots still unzipped, my fly still open, and my cut dangling from my fist. I slammed out the back door. No sign of her. I went back in and through the hall up into the bar. The crowd had started to dwindle and I caught Hollywood’s eye. He raised his eyebrows at me, taking in my disheveled appearance with a grin. When I saw no sign of her, I went back to the office to dress properly.
The pieces started to fall into place as I realized my angel, the blonde at the grocery store Hacker helped out and the sex kitten on the dance floor were actually one and the same. That meant the guy, Sam, he introduced me to was her brother, because I remembered him saying she was the little sister of his former teammate. My angel. Jesus, Hacker knew her this whole time! I pulled out my phone to call Hacker when I saw I had a text message.
Unknown number: Colton. This is my number. We need to talk, but I need some time to gather my thoughts. I’ll be in touch soon. Steph.
I fell back into the office chair, my phone dropping to the floor with a thump when it slipped from my slack fingers. What the fucking hell? How did she just get up and leave me? Put aside the mind-blowing sex, there was the matter of our insane history. Did it not mean a damn thing to her? Fuck. I needed to talk to her.
Then a sick feeling settled in my stomach as I remembered the guy she was dancing with. Fucking hell. She was with someone else, just like I fucking told myself she would be for the last three motherfucking years. It shouldn’t be a surprise to me. There shouldn’t be this vicious ache in my chest. I buried my head in my hands, clenching my hair as I fought the burn behind my eyelids.
Fuck. Just fuck.
I FELT LIKE A total piece of shit for the way I ran out on him. As I lay in bed, I tried to come up with a scenario that worked out without him hating me. I had his child and she was over two years old. He had missed two years of her life. In what world was that okay? In my defense, how was I supposed to find him when I had so very little to go on? I had his first name and very little else. Even now.
I continued to lay there staring at the ceiling, thinking about the end of the night…
My brothers looked at me like I lost my mind when I came rushing up to them begging for them to take me home. Sam was still sitting with Erik, who jumped up, asking if someone had fucked with me, and threatening to “take care of whoever it was.”
“No!” I burst out in horror. Oh dear God, I couldn’t have him going after one of his brothers because he thought he had done something. Jesus, God in heaven. “No, I just started really missing Remi. I haven’t been away from her like this before, and it got me worked up.” I tried to appear calmer and together. With the skeptical look I received from Erik, I wasn’t sure how well
I pulled it off.
My brothers didn’t question me further, and we drove home in silence. As I walked toward the house, Sam called out to me.
“Steph, if you need to talk, you know you can call me, right?” I smiled and nodded.
“Of course, I do. Thank you for everything.” I gave a small wave and slowly walked up the stairs and through the front door. I paused in the entryway, taking in the silence of the old house before heading up the stairs, avoiding the creaky ones as well as I did when I was a teen sneaking in late. Remi must be with my mom because she wasn’t in my room. I peeked in my brother’s old room, seeing my dad lying in the bed softly snoring. I smiled as I gently closed the door and went to my room.
So I lay there, staring at the ceiling with no answers to my dilemma. Maybe I should ask my mom.
No.
She would only worry and tell me I just needed to tell him. Well, that I already knew. Maybe I would just head back to Des Moines tomorrow after I met with Mama Jean to see what she needed help with. It would give me time and space to think, but I knew I couldn’t put it off too long.
I tossed and turned, trying desperately to go to sleep. I wished I could have showered after I got home, but I was afraid of waking everyone. I smelled him all over me. It was like he was wrapped around me, and every time I moved, I smelled a faint whiff of his cologne or his leather. Or sex. Yeah, I smelled a lot like sex. I needed to shower first thing in the morning before I ran into one of my parents. They may not notice, but that would still be awkward.
I punched my pillow in an attempt to make it more comfortable. No good. I flipped it over, looking for the cool spot. Nope. I tried counting sheep. Who the hell came up with that crappy idea? It didn’t work for shit! Ugh! I lay wide awake most of the night.
Colton's Salvation: A Demented Sons MC Novel Page 11
