Pumpkins, Cowboys & Guitars

by Patti Ann Colt

  Amy Rose sniffed. “Don’t make me cry.”

  “Wouldn’t think of it.” He pulled her to him and held her close. Her worry, her fears and the sheer struggle of being overwhelmed released.

  She used her weight to make Jess lay back and kissed his neck.

  His lips brushed her cheek, his hand found her backside. “You invitin’ or teasing, Mrs. O’Hare?”

  She shifted on top of him and spread kisses across his face and mouth. “Inviting. Definitely inviting.”

  “My favorite way to end an evening.”

  “Shhh, your reward for Oreos and ice cream.” She gently bit his earlobe, then laved it with her tongue.

  He moaned. “Reward away, honey.”

  He wrapped his arms around her. She shivered. A wall of heat made its way from the tip of her nose where he kissed her to her feminine core where he’d settled his hardness against her.

  This was where life was. Walls down. Hearts open.

  She laid her head against his heart and listened to the pounding there.

  “Amy? Sick?”

  She gave a small laugh. “For a change, no. I love you. That’s all.

  He twisted the two of them so they lay on their sides facing each other. “Prove it.”

  She laid her fingers against his mouth and he kissed them. “Your wish is forever my pleasure.”

  “You took the words right out of my mouth.”

  ∞∞∞∞

  Kendra fingered the crisp twenty dollar bills, took a deep breath to master her irritation. “I don’t need your money.”

  Shane looked up from devouring a bowl of chili and gave her an exasperated sigh. “I don’t expect you to feed me, let me sleep here, use your water for showers without pulling my weight. I know you’re struggling to get all the volume of supplies you need for your contract at the Low Down.”

  Her back teeth ground together. “That isn’t your problem. I can work this through myself. It’s my business.”

  He went still, never a good sign with a man in her experience. “I never said you couldn’t.”

  “Then you’ll take this back.” She walked to the counter and laid the bills in front of him.

  He slid them back. “No.”

  She put her fists to her hips and gave him “the look.” It was a point of pride; and dollars implied a seriousness to their relationship that she wasn’t sure she was ready for. “I’m not taking your money, Shane.”

  He put the spoon down and pushed the bowl toward her. “Then I quit eating here.”

  “I can afford to feed you.”

  “Why should you? It cuts into your bottom line. Don’t tell me it doesn’t.”

  “I buy a lot of these supplies anyway. To feed myself and to test things and to deliver cakes that have been ordered. There’s leftovers. Somebody has to eat them or I throw them out. You understand me?” She threw up her hands and walked back to the desk.

  “This is what I would pay if I ate alone at my apartment. Since I’m eating here all the time, I thought it would be helpful.” He rose out of his seat, walked up behind her and bent to kiss her neck. She pushed him away because he could make her soften.

  “You either take the dollars or I borrow your keys and fill your gas tank or mow your lawn so you don’t have to pay a service. Or I go to the grocery store myself and stock your cupboards. Bet I could figure out a few things by looking.” He went and opened the first cupboard with her cake flour and sugar.

  She came behind him and closed the door. “Shane, it’s important for me to do this myself. Please understand.”

  He leaned in until his nose touched hers. “I’m pretty sure if I checked your business plan – and I’m sure you have one – that feeding me is not on the list.”

  “It’s not that big of deal. Honestly, Shane.”

  “It is to me.”

  Exhaustion washed over her. “Why have I never been to this apartment?”

  “Because it’s only where I store my stuff. I have one sofa, one bed, a bunch of boxes, and a rotten lemon in the fridge.”

  “Where did you eat before?”

  Shane tensed and she twisted around to look at him. “Shane?”

  “In case you hadn’t noticed, I work all the time. I eat at the firehouse. I eat out. I eat with family. Now I’m not doing as much as I was because I’m eating here.” He handed her back the money.

  She stared at the bills for a moment and debated. She was broke. Which was worse? Calling her uncle and borrowing money or accepting Shane’s contribution?

  She took the bills out of his hand. “Just so we understand each other, I don’t accept a charity handout. I feed you at my pleasure.”

  “Mine, too.” He bent and kissed her. “I hoped you’d think of me as a partner.”

  “Can you cook or bake?”

  “No, but I can wash dishes and taste test.”

  “Well, that’s a partnership I can get behind then.” She wrapped her arms around his waist. “It’s important to me to make this work, by myself.”

  “But you aren’t by yourself, right? You have clients, people who are paying you, telling their friends. Repeat customers who are enjoying your cakes. They are part of the success, too, right?”

  “Yes, but…”

  “It’s settled then. You feed me. I pay. I’ll wash your dishes, taste everything. You won’t argue with me when I drop a couple hundred dollars on your desk for my share.”

  “It’s too much.”

  “I’ve been the grocery store lately, honey. No, it isn’t.”

  He released her and went back to his chili, and she let him. His handing her cash still rankled, but he was right. She could use the money and if she had to accept help from anyone, Shane was the best alternative.

  Shane took another bite. “I keep eating like this, though, I need to run again. We haven’t been for a while.”

  She sagged onto the stool next to him and ran a hand over his hair. “No energy. By the time I’m done baking and delivering, I’m done.”

  “Maybe we could trade to evening. You come home from delivering your cakes, nap and then we go out. The last few days it has cooled off a bit.”

  “What? Ninety-nine versus one hundred ten? The heat is why I quit running at night in the first place.”

  “How about we head down to the park for a walk at least, anyway.”

  “Could we maybe find somewhere else to walk? I know I should be over this already, but I still get nervous about running into that horse again.”

  Shane rolled his shoulders and rose to take his dishes to the sink. “We never did really talk about your accident in high school.”

  She rubbed her stomach, soothing the ache that always popped out of nowhere when the subject came up. “I don’t talk about that much anymore.”

  He leaned back against the counter and stayed silent. If he’d asked a bunch of questions, maybe she could have blown him off, but he had understanding etched in his face.

  “We weren’t supposed to be out. It was after curfew, but we decided to go visit a friend. Cris was spending the night with me. I’d just gotten my new car. We had a friend who lived out in the country and we decided to sneak out and go visit her. You know country roads.”

  “Yeah, I do.” Shane moved back to his seat and took her hand. “What happened?”

  “Lots of curves. Dark. We were talking boys and music and school gossip. Rounded a corner, wasn’t speeding, but there was this monster horse. No room to go around, no room to even think except brake. I hit him.” She swallowed hard and gripped his hand.

  He swept his free hand through her hair. “Go on.”

  “Cris wasn’t in her seatbelt. The impact was like hitting a brick wall. The front end of my car crumpled like a soda can. Cris got thrown out. The horse came to a stop on the roof of my car.

  “I’m sorry, honey.” He rubbed her neck.

  “I remember all the screaming and moaning the horse did. I couldn’t find Cris. I hurt all over. A rancher came
on us and called an ambulance and shot the horse, I think. Cris broke her neck and died at the scene. I was in the hospital for three weeks. Missed the last three months of that school year. Both my legs were broken and my hip, plus my collarbone and shoulder.” She touched each piece of her body, then brushed away the tears at the corner of her eyes. “That’s all.”

  “Not quite.” He lifted her to his lap. “I’m sorry I asked.”

  “It’s done. I’ve made peace with being at fault for all of it.”

  He lifted her chin, and she was forced to look at him. Deep sorrow filled his eyes. “Some things just happen. Sometimes it really is an accident.”

  She shook her head. “We shouldn’t have left the house.”

  “A conclusion fueled by regret.” Shane settled her against him and rubbed her back. “I know this better than anyone.”

  She accepted Shane’s comfort and struggled to shove the incident back into the dark closed box in her mind. She wiggled out of his lap and went to the refrigerator for juice.

  Shane’s phone went off. They stared at each other for a moment and then Shane lifted the phone and read a text message. His eyebrows drew together. He typed back.

  “Something wrong?” She sipped her juice, struggling against emotional fatigue.

  “Friend with a problem.” The phone went off again. Shane read the message and rubbed his forehead. “I’m going to have to go out.”

  Kendra shrugged. “Okay.” She needed some privacy for a while anyway to regroup.

  Shane put his phone on the counter and walked to her. “I was hoping to get a nap in and make you forget my nosiness.”

  “Well, a nap will be involved while you’re gone. I have to sleep for a bit before I go to the grocery store.”

  “I should be back before then. I’ll go with you and be your heavy lifter.” He gave her quick kiss and then came back for more.

  He pulled away. “You rattle me, woman.”

  “Ditto, slick. Go help your friend.”

  He picked up his keys and left.

  She drained the rest of her juice, put the cup in the sink and turned to find Shane’s cellphone still on the counter.

  “Oh, God!” She grabbed the phone and ran to the front door. He needed this phone on him at all times. That’s how the fire department got in touch with him when they needed him for fires and emergencies.

  Shane was backing out of the driveway. She waved at him, but he didn’t see her.

  She rushed back inside and grabbed her purse and keys and ran to her car. Maybe she could catch him.

  She started her car and pulled out, glad she’d backed into the carport to set up for cake delivery. She caught sight of his truck and turned that direction to follow him. He drove north on Copper Canyon, past the fire station, and drove on. Well, he hadn’t said it was a fire buddy. Shane had lived around here all his life. He could know dozens of people. The thought made her uneasy. She hadn’t met any of those people. She’d met one friend from the fire department because she’d made his son a birthday cake, on Shane’s recommendation.

  Shane turned on Orchard Hill and a few seconds later, she turned, too. He still hadn’t noticed her following him. She drove past a lot of land that was scorched from a fire and a house that had burned down.

  A bit further on, Shane turned between the entry posts for a ranch. This must be where his friend lived.

  Embarrassed, she didn’t know what to do. Should she barge in, smile and say “here’s your phone,” and back out again? Or should she sit here and listen for his phone to ring and only go in if it did? Or should she go back home and pretend she hadn’t seen the phone on the damn counter and followed him?

  She drove to the entrance, checked for traffic and stopped. On the fence was an engraved sign: O’Hare Ranch.

  “What the hell?” This place was less than five miles from her house. When Shane said he had family around, she’d thought they were further away. In almost three months together, why hadn’t she met them?

  “Dammit.” She clenched her hands around the steering wheel. In the pasture, cattle were milling around. Down the long driveway, there was a big house and a couple of barns with two horses in the corral. Shane had parked his truck next to another vehicle and disappeared.

  House or barn?

  She hadn’t been watching.

  She rubbed a hand over her churning stomach. “He’ll have an explanation, Kendra. He will.”

  Like your father did?

  Before she could think herself into a total meltdown, she turned down the driveway and slowly crept toward the barn. She parked next to Shane, trying to ignore the trembling of her body.

  Damn him. He knew she was afraid of horses and she had said she wanted to take it slow, but his family was right here.

  “Right here, Shane!” Her cry echoed in the car.

  Why hadn’t he told her?

  Hurt barreled through her, followed closely by a flash of anger.

  He was the last person she’d wanted to lie to her.

  ∞∞∞ ∞∞∞

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Shane shook his head to clear his hearing. “She’s having what?”

  “You heard me.” Jess shoveled more debris from the horse’s stall into the wheelbarrow. The horses were in the pasture, so the barn was quiet. The shade of the barn abated the heat of the day. “Three. Trio. Tres. Babies.”

  Shane grinned. “You said that real calm like.”

  Jess snorted and wiped his brow. “Uh, that would be not. Just trying to keep it together because Amy Rose is freaked and she has to do all the heavy lifting.”

  “Where is she?”

  “Up at the house with Mom. We’re going to have to move out of the foreman’s place when the babies come. No room. We’re going to need about six more sets of hands. Wondered if maybe I could sign you and Kendra up?”

  Shane paled and collapsed on a barrel. Kendra. God. He was in so damn deep…

  “I’d be happy to. Kendra? Jury’s out.”

  “So you told her.”

  “No, not yet.”

  Jess set aside his pitch fork and took the other barrel. “You told Dad you would tell her. What are you waiting for?”

  He ground his teeth. “No, Dad told me I should tell her. I haven’t yet. Need to. But can’t figure out a way to do it without losing her.”

  “Look, Shane, there isn’t an easy way to tell her.”

  He was a few seconds late in figuring out what happened. “Oh geez, Dad told you we talked. Did he tell Mom?”

  “Not that I know of. That’s a problem, too. You sure know how to piss off the women in your life. But that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about.”

  “There’s more?” Shane recognized Jess’s quiet gaze and a ripple of foreboding skittered over his skin. “What?”

  Jess put his hands on his knees and looked down at the ground. Finally, he stared directly at Shane. “I don’t know how to say this, so I’m going to blurt it out. I found a YouTube video from the Mayhill Rodeo. I saw the accident.”

  The air knocked out of Shane’s lungs. “What the hell, Jess?”

  “Please tell me that’s not why you quit rodeo.”

  Shane rose, agitation making him pace to the end of the stalls and back. “What in the hell did you go snooping for, Jess?”

  Jess rose and faced off. “YouTube isn’t exactly snooping, brother. You aren’t acting like yourself. You’ve been getting more distant and closed off. It’s killing all of us.”

  He wanted to grab Jess by his shirt front and punch him. “What’s acting like myself? Explain that to me, because I sure as hell don’t know an answer to that.”

  “Keeping to yourself. Missing Thursday and Sunday dinners. Working all the time at fire station and never at the ranch. Especially in the last three months.”

  Shane started to protest the hard fire season, but Jess raised his hand and stopped him. “Yeah, I know all about the fire season. But you quit riding Dreamer, quit working wit
h the other horses. You used to come every day and ride the land. You’re lying to Kendra. That is not the Shane I know.”

  Shane clenched his fists and put his nose in Jess’s face. “How is this any of your business?”

  Jess jabbed him with his forefinger. “You punch me, I’m punching back. Clear?”

  “You think you can take me?” He shifted to the balls of his feet, consumed by a red haze.

  “I think we can both hold our own, then we’ll have to explain what in the hell we were arguing about that caused a fist fight. I don’t want to explain that to my wife even though she knows most of it, let alone our mother who doesn’t.”

  Shane sagged, pent up frustration clawing him from the inside out. “Dammit, Jess.”

  Jess stepped away and sighed. “You’re my brother. I’ve been asking for ages what was wrong, begging you to talk to me. Please don’t tell me you blame yourself for that accident.”

  “It was my fault!” He hissed the words in Jess’s face, erupting with the force of years of guilt.

  Jess didn’t even blink. “How?”

  Shane shoved Jess and moved away. “You saw the video. I knew that horse. Had ridden her before. She was excessively irritable and antsy. I’d been on her a time or two to know. She should have been pulled. I got on her anyway. Thought I could handle her.”

  Jess grabbed his arm and turned him back. “You wouldn’t be the first bronc rider who thought that, Shane. Bill Fudd knew the risks when he stepped in the arena. Y’all sign medical waivers for God’s sake!”

  Shane stilled, anger jamming his throat. He clenched his hands into fists and paced away.

  Jess drew a deep breath. “Yeah, Amy Rose found him.”

  Shane turned back. “Found him? He isn’t lost, dammit.”

  Jess drew back. “You know where he is?”

  “Yes,” he bit out around the boulder in his throat. “He lives with his sister in Tyler. I visit him a couple times a month and talk to her at least once a week.” Or he had been until fire season hit.

  “Why? To keep punishing yourself?”