“Yes, it is necessary, Mother.” Carlee turned and stomped out. The slamming door punctuated the statement.
Zach rubbed the bridge of his nose.
“Are you going to let her get away with that?”
Zach felt the steam of his temper and had to pause several long seconds to get himself calmed. He used those quiet moments to glare at Denise. “Seems to me she was justified. We owe her an apology. Not a conversation we should have started with her near.”
He thought he was being magnanimous by offering to share the blame.
“We?” She pointed at Leia. “I’m not the one shacking up with a Rock Star.”
Zach rolled his eyes. “Enough. I’m going after Carlee.” He walked to the counter and slipped his cell phone into his pocket.
“To do what? Explain the bedroom scene she shouldn’t even have witnessed?”
Leia strode into the room. “That’s enough. This is my house, and more than enough has been said. Get out.” Leia’s face was flushed, her eyes snapping with temper. Zach considered how the argument must have sounded to Leia and took another deep breath. He reached for her hand.
“Sorry. You’re right. I have to go after Carlee.”
“Go.” She bit her lip and he fought the strongest urge to stroke a finger over the lip and make her stop it. The tender flesh deserved to be treated better.
Yet, Carlee waited. She had to be his first consideration—always.
For the first time, the fact pushed against him, making him want to chuck his responsibilities, and that froze his guts. Last night wasn’t supposed to be about forever. He couldn’t let Leia in. He’d already lost too much, did a balancing act with his life and responsibilities all the time, and Denise was right about one thing. Leia was a star. This was a blip in time for her.
“You okay?” He bent to look in her eyes, but Leia wouldn’t look away from Denise.
“I’m fine. We’ll talk later.” She glanced at him and gave him a half smile that wasn’t anywhere near the kiss he’d like to have to express his enjoyment of last night or to say goodbye. He wasn’t proud of his behavior, never intended for Carlee to find out that he’d been intimate with Leia, never intended for any of this.
“How touching.” Denise’s nasal edge made him back away.
“Enough, Denise. Come with me.” Zach walked to the back door and picked up his duty belt. He shrugged into his jacket and gave Denise an impatient signal.
Denise sauntered to the door, a victorious look on her face that made Zach want to throttle her. He watched her walk carefully down the snowy driveway and looked back before shutting the door. Leia stared at him, her expression inscrutable. Dressed like a waif in sweatpants and sweatshirt with fuzzy slippers, she looked as young as Carlee. And as lost.
He stopped, wanting to go back and reassure her, say anything to make the morning start better. But she mouthed “Carlee,” shooed him with her fingers and turned her back, disappearing into their private lair by the fireplace—a place he could never visit again.
He was struck by her aloneness and realized that their private bubble in the last weeks of her illness had shattered. He didn’t like that one damn bit.
Leia tightened her ski jacket around her and dashed from her car into the Curly Q. The sidewalk was icy and she slipped. She grabbed the doorknob and caught herself from a nasty fall just in time. She was AWOL from her house, but since she hadn’t seen Zach or Carlee in two days, not since the blowup in her kitchen, she figured she was justified. Christmas was day after tomorrow. She had no plans, had been hoping to spend it with the Murphy family, but hadn’t wanted to impose or beg.
The thought of spending Christmas Eve and Day alone wrecked her, especially after all the time she’d been spending with his family since she’d gotten sick. She would not give into it. She was grocery shopping, getting treats and going to at least make an attempt to celebrate even if she was alone.
Her heart ached because Zach had been by. The evidence was in the wood on the porch, stacked higher than her, and the fact he hadn’t come in. Either he came in the dead of night, or when he knew she usually took a nap so he wouldn’t have to talk to her and she wasn’t exactly sure what she’d done.
She’d asked him not to believe what other people thought, but to believe what she told him. Apparently, he didn’t. Or it had something to do with Carlee and Denise, and not knowing was driving her crazy.
What she did know for sure was that according to Grannie Dunn, Zach had made welfare checks on everyone on the block when the temperature had dropped to subzero, but he hadn’t talked to her. What other conclusion was possible except that he was avoiding her?
Was he staying away because Carlee was mad, Denise didn’t like it, the night had been a dud for him? She didn’t know what he was thinking and it was driving her to want to collapse on his doorstep again just so she could get some answers.
She toyed with parking herself in his office at the sheriff’s department, but she didn’t want to start gossip. She thought about going across the street, but she didn’t want another repeat of the scene with Denise. Carlee had been hurt enough.
The whiff of fresh bread upon closing the door made her groan and derailed the deepening tunnel of tumultuous thoughts. The place was empty. Seems like nobody else wanted to brave the temperatures. The way her lungs were feeling, she probably shouldn’t have either, but damned if she cared at the moment. She’d been cooped up for three weeks.
“Why, Miss Leia!” Tiny’s voice boomed from the back. “What are you doing out in this cold, cold weather? Trying to get sick again?”
She shook off her hood and walked to the counter. “I need sustenance of the sugar variety, of the bread variety, of the pie variety.”
Tiny gave a belly laugh. The man was Santa in a baker’s apron. “I have it all. Pumpkin or apple?”
Leia licked her lips, tasting them already. “Both.”
“Cookies or cake?”
She chewed her lip, considering. “Both.”
“Rolls or some sliced bread?”
“Both,” he said with her.
“Want me to throw in some donuts?”
“Yes.” He nodded with her.
“I’m in crisis, Tiny. I need thinking food.”
“Well, let me get a cup of hot chocolate for you and you can tell me all about it.”
Leia took off her gloves and loosened her coat. The bakery smells comforted and soothed the ache. She shrugged out of her coat and put it on the back of the chair just as Tiny rushed forward with a cup of hot chocolate.
“Here, Miss Leia. This will warm you up.” He set the cup on the table and stepped back and gazed at her. “You look like you lost your best friend.”
Tears flooded her eyes. “I’m not sure what’s going on, Tiny.”
“Let me warm up a breakfast croissant and we’ll sit and have coffee and talk.” The big man lumbered back to the kitchen. Leia reached for a napkin and wiped her nose. The hot chocolate teased her senses and she took a sip, savoring the sweet as it slid down her throat.
Tiny came back and set a small plate in front of her with a breakfast croissant and some butter. He pulled out a chair and sat with his own cup of coffee.
“Tell Tiny all about it. I promise I won’t tell anyone.” He held up his hand in a Boy Scout pose.
Leia gave a small laugh. “I appreciate that, Tiny.”
“It’s about the sheriff, isn’t it?”
Her throat closed on the words, damning that first thought that caused her to wonder what people were saying behind her back. “That obvious?”
“Well, something’s got his tail in a knot. He was in just a while ago looking like he wanted to strangle someone. I know he’s been taking care of you. Kinda easy to put two and two together.”
She took a sip of her hot chocolate and thought through what she wanted to say. “I haven’t seen him for two days.”
Tiny’s brow rose. “Then it wasn’t you that made him snarly?”<
br />
She shook her head. “I’m guessing it was Denise.”
“His ex. She’s in town?”
“Yeah.” She bit her lip, desperate to confide. She had to talk to someone and if the story ended up in the tabloids, she’d just give up on the human race. “Promise me you won’t say anything.”
“That’s a promise easily made, Leia.”
She looked in the kind eyes of the baker and realized how badly her faith in people had been damaged. It wasn’t a realization that sat very well with her innate personality. But she needed the perspective of someone who had known Zach for awhile and she didn’t want to talk to his brothers.
She took a deep breath and plunged. “The night of the bad storm, Carlee went up to the lodge with Beau. Zach spent the night. With me.”
She stopped and looked at him to see if she had to spell it out any clearer. God, she hoped not.
The man nodded, not seeming surprised. “Go on.”
“We got caught with our pants down, literally, the next morning by Carlee and her mother.”
Tiny whistled. “Not good.”
“Tiny, what do you know about Denise?”
“She’s been in and out of here at a whim for years. Thinks her career takes precedence over Carlee. Zach’s said a few things.” He shrugged.
“They had a huge fight in my kitchen. Over me. Carlee heard every word.”
“Oh, man.” Tiny reached for her hand and she wrapped her fingers around his strong, callused ones and hung on.
“Carlee stomped out. She isn’t speaking to me, either. Zach left with Denise and I haven’t seen him or talked to him since. I feel like I caused this.”
“How? Not your fault Zach’s a healthy male and has stellar taste in women.” The man grinned at her. “Denise brings out the worst in both of them. Maybe you just need to ride it out until she leaves. Believe me with that one, it could be any minute.”
“You think that’s all it is?”
“Without a doubt. Hang on, missy. This will straighten out.” Tiny released her hand and rose. “Let me get you your treats and you finish your hot chocolate.”
“Okay. Thanks for listening to me, Tiny.”
“Any time, Leia. I may be a big fan, but I’d also like to be your friend.”
Leia gave the man the sweetest smile she could muster. “You are. Thanks for the talk.”
Tiny made his way back to the kitchen and Leia turned to look out the window. Her gaze caught on the paper rack next to the door and she stared in disbelief. She shoved away from the table and walked over to get a better look. There on the front page of the most popular tabloid was a picture of her dressed for the Grammy’s last year with a headline—Leia Shae enters Rehab!
She yanked a copy off the top and read the first paragraph, swearing as tears filled her eyes. “Dammit.”
She scanned the rest of the article and cussed some more when she saw Heidi Bowers name. Wasn’t this just an ugly coincidence? Tabloids had been quiet on her front for weeks, her whereabouts unreported. Then Denise arrived—a reporter. All of a sudden, her name is in the news again with a lie that lined right up with the criticism Denise had leveled at Zach.
Fury pounded her. She knew better than to let these rags get the best of her, but damn it. Now was so not the time for sensational headlines that most would take as truth.
Tiny came up behind her. “Saw that. Don’t these people have enough real news that they don’t have to make stuff up?”
“Apparently not. Can I take one?”
“Sure. The truth will prevail.” He held out his arms for a hug and she took it. Needed it.
“Thanks, Tiny.”
He handed her three bags with her order. “On the house, Miss Leia. Lots of good stuff there. Merry Christmas. Enjoy it.”
“Oh, Tiny, thank you. Merry Christmas to you, too.” She stepped over to the table and put on her coat and gloves.
“Get home and out of this cold. Can’t have you having a relapse.”
“I will. As soon as I do a couple other errands.” She hurried out the door and got in her car, waving at Tiny as she pulled out.
She hadn’t planned to walk into the sheriff’s office, but now she had to. She had to warn Zach of these headlines before Denise ambushed him with it to support her cause. Even though he knew she wasn’t in rehab, would he defend her against Denise?
She didn’t know and her breath hitched in her throat, hung up on a ball of hurt. Because two nights ago, along with intimate access to her body, she’d given him access to her soul. If she lost him, she’d never recover.
Christmas morning at noon, Leia arrived at the Murphy home. At the sheriff’s office a day before yesterday, she hadn’t found Zach, much to her frustration, but had met Fiona on the street and been invited to spend the day with the family.
Even though she had hoped for just such an invitation, she’d hedged. The enormity of being perky or dealing with the fallout from her night with Zach stopped her for a moment. For sure she needed to talk to father and daughter, but two nights spent worrying and an early morning up drinking coffee had her nerves in a basket with a pretty bow on top.
She’d dressed carefully, forgoing jeans for black slacks and a festive green cashmere sweater and simple, sheepskin-lined boots. If she spent an inordinate amount of time in front of the mirror on her makeup and hair, she justified it. It was about the occasion, not because she was spending Christmas with Zach.
The sub-zero weather made the snow crunchy as she made her way up the shoveled walk to the front door. She didn’t know whether to pray that Zach opened the front door and she had a minute alone with him or to ease into it with family around.
She stamped up the steps, knocking ice and snow off her boots, and rang the bell before she could think this thing any further to death than she already had.
Carlee opened the door. Her face twisted into a scowl. “Oh, it’s you.”
Hurt speared through her, but she put a smile on her face. “Merry Christmas, Carlee.”
Beau came up behind the young girl. “Leia, come on in.”
Carlee moved away from the door and disappeared into the kitchen without any further word.
“Don’t mind her. She’s just a bit out of joint. Zach’s out on a call and not here yet.” Beau took her leather coat and hung it up in the entry way closet.
“He worked last night?” She moistened her lips, trying to stifle the butterflies in her stomach. Minor reprieve. Who knew it would be so hard to face him after their night together?
Beau cleared his throat. “Yeah. Come on in the kitchen. Aunt Fiona’s doing her magic.”
She followed Beau, reaching for calm. The house smelled of pine and gingerbread and baking bread. As only Fiona could do, the house was showroom perfect, every decoration just so, presents piled under the tree, lights twinkling.
The perfectness of the decorations gave her a pang, missing her mother. She hadn’t been to a family Christmas in years. Her last few had been spent in hotels, having dinner with her manager or some of the single band members. She’d always chalked it up to the price of her fame, but now she understood.
She’d made a choice. She could have had a wonderful Christmas every year, even if she’d been alone.
Beau opened the swinging door to the kitchen and stepped aside.
Leia brushed past him and came face-to-face with Denise and her smirk. She sat at the kitchen island, in an elegant red pantsuit. Carlee was next to her, glaring at everything and everyone.
“Merry Christmas, Leia.” Fiona’s smile smoothed over the shock. She was up to her elbows in stuffing, shoving the mixture into a turkey for the fancy dinner that would follow this afternoon’s more low-key brunch.
For the first time in a long time, Leia’s social poise deserted her and she fumbled for a response. “Merry Christmas to all of you.”
Wyatt waved a hand from the stove. Something for brunch smelled delicious.
With the ingredients spread around
him, she wasn’t sure what exactly he was making, but she wasn’t hungry. Tiny’s pumpkin pie eaten at three a.m. was sitting in the back of her throat.
Ryder waved her to the table. “Come join us for a cup of coffee and stay out of the way of the maestros.”
She took him up on the offer, wanting to put as much room between Denise and herself as possible. Ryder rose to help her with her chair. “You look beautiful. Fiona didn’t tell you Denise would be here, did she?” He whispered near her ear so no one else could hear.
Leia shook her head, frustration shifting her mood to match Carlee’s.
“Don’t let Denise get to you.” He gave her back a small pat and moved back to his chair.
She closed her eyes for a moment and forced herself to settle. Beau set a mug in front of her and sat down next to her.
“Did you talk to Zach, Beau? How much longer will he be?” Fiona moved around Wyatt and washed her hands in the sink.
“He didn’t say. Just that he’d be here as soon as he could.”
Fiona walked to Carlee and rubbed her shoulders. “Well, then we’re going to make the best of it until he gets here.”
“I don’t know why stupid people have to come before our Christmas.” Carlee stomped from the room.
Denise made no attempt to follow her to chastise or soothe.
Beau started to rise. “I’ll go talk to her.”
He disappeared behind the swing doors. Leia took a drink of coffee, which she didn’t need, and glanced around the room.
Tension hummed, shifting and shimmering.
She glanced at Ryder and mouthed at him. “Why is she here?”
“Carlee’s mom. Christmas. Rude to exclude her.” He mouthed back, grimacing. He shrugged. “Would you like to see the tree and Fiona’s decorations, Leia?”
“Oh yes,” Fiona gushed. “Show her Santa’s place.”
Leia sighed in relief. Anything to get out of the kitchen. “I’d love that.”
“We’ll be ready in ten minutes to eat.” Wyatt turned and gave her a commiserating wink. “And we eat, Zach or no Zach. He wouldn’t want us to wait. Denise you want to sample this? Tell me what you think.”
Pumpkins, Cowboys & Guitars Page 63
