Pumpkins, Cowboys & Guitars

by Patti Ann Colt

  He forced himself away from the window and went up the stairs into his room. He stripped the bed and pulled the hamper to the door. But his hands weren’t busy enough to overpower the bounce house that was his thoughts.

  He missed her. Badly.

  Now he was worried, too.

  If he had a choice, he’d start over with her, make her understand how important she was to him, but those ideas and pining like a love sick fool, didn’t mean that the problems weren’t still there and he had no idea how to work that out. She’d stepped back into her world and confronted her problems regardless of the cost and he’d pulled back and buried himself.

  He sat heavily on the bed. He wasn’t sure he was man enough to face the fear that was stopping him. He didn’t deserve her if he couldn’t do that.

  “Dad?”

  He looked up to see Carlee leaning on the doorframe. “Good morning, honey. How’d you sleep?”

  She came into the room and sat beside him, leaning against him. “Fine, I guess.”

  Surprised, Zach put his arm around her. She was grounded for another three weeks and still pretty mad about it, so he wasn’t sure whether this was a signal for fair weather or a momentary need to be cuddled.

  “We’re going to Fiona’s for lunch and I have to stop at the bakery and the hardware store. You up for that?”

  “Sure, Dad.” She sounded unenthusiastic, but he took her yes at face value.

  “Let’s get out of her then. Go get dressed.” He gave her a quick hug.

  “Do I have time for a shower?”

  “Sure. I’ll get the laundry sorted.” He watched her walk out, and noted how tall she’d gotten. She had a skier’s body, all arms and legs and angles. She was filling out and becoming a beautiful young woman. That sixteen-year-old moron had an understanding of the appeal of his little girl and that both appalled him and made him proud. In just a few short years, she’d be moving forward with a life of her own and dear old dad would be alone with his need to protect himself.

  When did he forget how to risk?

  When had he forgotten how to love?

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  Zach left Carlee in the truck with the heat running and dashed into the hardware store. He breathed a sigh of relief when Carlee came downstairs in jeans, boots and a normal sweater, no grunge in site, ready to go to Fiona’s for lunch without an argument. She wasn’t happy, and stayed silent with her music player plugged into her ears, but her temper apparently was mellowing.

  Inside the store, he took a moment to shuck his gloves and review his mental list. Grannie Dunn was just coming away from the cash register and stopped in front of him.

  “Sheriff.”

  “Grannie.” He raised a finger to his hat.

  “Supposed to snow tonight, then get real cold again.”

  “So I heard.”

  “Leia has one of those new-fangled computerized control pads for her heat. Don’t know if she set it to keep the house from freezing.”

  “I’ll go over and take a look.”

  “Why didn’t she just ask you to look after the house like always? You do something to make her mad?”

  Something.

  She gave him a recriminatory stare and he squirmed in his boots like he was a teenager caught in the backseat with his hands in an inappropriate spot on the girl.

  “She’s a good girl. You should grab her. She’s pretty, talented, smart, and has a heart of gold. What more do you want?”

  Her tone implied he was crazy and maybe he was. She brushed past him without making him reply.

  “Let me know what you figure out.”

  He managed to find his voice. “I will.” But the door had already closed behind her.

  He looked up to find Gena Parsons bearing down on him. “What can I help you with Zach?”

  “Need some plumbing supplies. Kitchen faucet’s leaking. Need to recaulk the tub.”

  “New faucets or just washers?”

  He followed her to the plumbing aisle. “New washers to start with.”

  She stopped in front of the washer section. “You heard from Leia? I have the indoor/outdoor carpet she ordered for her back porch.”

  “Uh, haven’t talked to her, but I’ll pass it along when I do.”

  She cocked her head and gave him a prying stare. “Grannie said there was a news van over there. You chase them off?”

  “Didn’t have to. Leia did that.” Then she left.

  “Don’t like them sniffing around her here. She’s happy. They should leave her alone.”

  “Free country.”

  “Yes, it is. Wish they’d come in here so I could give them a piece of my mind.”

  Zach pulled back and looked at her, struck by the notion that the town would want to defend Leia. “Town could do without their interference, that’s for sure.” He fingered through the supplies until he found the washers he thought would fit.

  “I’d like to call a press conference of my own and call them all a bunch of liars. She’s the sweetest thing. Doesn’t deserve all this press.”

  Zach didn’t know quite what to do with Gena’s temper on the subject. “Feeling a tad protective?”

  She blushed. “Yes. You should be, too. She’s one of us now.”

  She’s one of us now.

  Of all the things, he’d never expected that sentiment. He slid his purchases across the counter, and handed her the dollars and accepted his change, skipping the rest of his shopping list.

  “I’ll hold her carpet in the back. Just let me know.”

  “I’m on my way to Fiona’s for lunch. I’ll stop by on the way back and get it.”

  He walked out of the store, got back into the car and eyed Carlee.

  “What?” Her defensive tone made him shrug off what he’d been about to ask.

  “Nothing.” He pulled out and drove down the block, glad to find a parking place to the Curly Q right in front.

  Carlee put her music player on the dash and followed him in, never in the mood to turn away one of Tiny’s sweet concoctions. The baker was at the counter talking with Miss Stolt, the first grade teacher.

  “What can I get you, Zach?”

  “Fiona’s order and whatever Carlee wants.”

  But Carlee wasn’t behind him. She’d stopped by the paper racks by the door and pulled out a couple of the tabloids. “Dad?”

  He turned to look and found Leia’s face plastered over both papers in the rack.

  “You don’t believe none of that now,” Tiny called.

  “Certainly not,” Miss Stolt added. “Why some of that is the worst hogwash I ever heard in my life. That girl never hurt anyone.”

  But Carlee was already reading the front page. He went to her side and read over her shoulder.

  “Rock Star bankrupt. Money woes halt album production. Manager fired.” He read the headlines out loud, the words as much inflammatory as the visual headlines.

  The picture showed a tired and harassed Leia with one security guard behind her, elbowing through the crowd. The sight made Zach’s stomach tighten with concern, guilt, and a whole lot of needing to hold her. Times like this called for family, for a town being behind you, for the man who loved you to not be such a chicken.

  “Dad? You think it’s true.” Carlee’s eyes were flooded with tears.

  “Maybe. Ryder’s there with her.”

  She looked as miserable as Leia. “We’re stupid, Dad. We should be there, too.”

  God, he missed her. He wanted her beside him, strumming her guitar until forever. He didn’t want to walk away and not know what happened in the next chapter. He’d had a lot of time to think over what he’d said and was ashamed of himself for blaming Leia for a teenage incident that would happen again and again, because that’s what happens with kids when they grow.

  He was pissed for trapping himself in a way of life that was for Carlee’s benefit and not making either of them happy. He didn’t want to hang onto any of those old hurts that trapped him like
a rusty pair of handcuffs.

  In a moment of clarity, he accepted that life was in front of him, Leia was in front of him and would love with her whole heart. She’d be an adventure, a risk, but wasn’t it time he took one?

  He lifted the paper from Carlee’s hand and put it back in the rack. He had to clear his throat before he got the words out. “Yeah, we should. Let’s go.”

  He took Fiona’s order from Tiny and hurried to the truck with Carlee right behind him. He waited until she’d fastened her seatbelt before he spoke. “I love Leia, Carlee. This whole mess has been my fault. I should have never let her leave. I thought I was protecting you, protecting this town when I was really protecting myself. I want her in my life, our lives for years to come. Can you understand that?” He turned at looked at Carlee to see if she understood what he was trying to say.

  “I said some horrible things to her, Dad. I didn’t mean any of them. I was just mad at Mom and I didn’t like being used.”

  “Nobody does, honey. But that wasn’t Leia’s fault.”

  She looked down at her boots, tears on her cheeks. “I know. I love her, too. She was my friend and I blew it, too. We need to say we’re sorry. Think she’ll talk to us?”

  Uncertainty swept through him, but he stifled it. He clenched his jaw, feeling things settle inside. “We’ll make her understand.”

  They drove to Fiona’s and with a few phone calls arranged for the Family Murphy—Zach, Carlee, Fiona, Beau, and Wyatt, to join Ryder in helping Leia. They were her family. They stood behind her, good or bad. More importantly, Zach was her man and it was time he started acting like it.

  The conference room was quiet for the first time in hours. The long sleek table with the glass top looked like it belonged in the mansion, not the office, but it was currently their war room for figuring out how bad off she was. Coffee cups and fast food discards littered the table. The windows along the front side of the room shone out over Los Angeles, framing the tall buildings and the smog-filled sky.

  “I wish I had better news.” Ryder slapped the legal papers on the table, startling Leia out of her misery.

  She’d chewed her lip raw and couldn’t stop. If she did she’d just open her mouth and scream. “So the truth is, according to his contract, he didn’t really rob me blind. But he took advantage of every loophole and robbed me blind.”

  Ryder grimaced. “He dipped into your pot frequently to support his lifestyle. Your mother gave him a lot of leeway and you had no reason to question it.”

  “Polite way to say I was stupid. I’m broke.” She rose and walked to the window, not wanting Ryder to see the tears on her cheeks.

  “Not by a long shot. Just short of usable cash. Sell the Beverly Hills house, cut your staff by twenty percent to reduce your payroll, pay for your next album from the proceeds, hire a new manager and then renegotiate your music contract to include a higher percentage for secondary products, and do a tour. Should go a long ways toward working things out.”

  She felt crushed by the sheer volume of work involved in those simple statements. She just wanted to go back to her house in Colorado and bury her heartache in Zach’s arms. Was that too much to ask?

  She had to know. “Have you talked to Zach? Told him?”

  “I’m your lawyer, Leia. Confidential. I haven’t told Zach anything. That’s up to you.”

  She turned away from the window and let him see her misery. “He let me walk away.”

  Ryder leaned back in his chair and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He’d been working tirelessly, but the whole situation was taking its toll. “Our parents’ deaths left a pretty big void. Then Denise screwed with his head. But he’s smart and I’ve seen how he looks at you when he thinks no one is watching. Be patient. He’ll figure it out.”

  “You’re so sure.” She turned back to watch the sunset.

  “He’d be a fool not to want you, problems and all. Call him.”

  Her breath seized in her throat and she coughed. Ryder brought her a glass of water, but she didn’t answer him.

  She couldn’t pull Zach into this. She didn’t have that right. He’d hate it, and end up opposed to her life even more. No, that wasn’t the way to convince the man he could be a part of who she was. She didn’t know how to convince him now. This was going to take months to sort out. During those months, the tabloids weren’t going to leave her alone.

  “I think we should quit and go to dinner. Then we can review the notes for the morning press conference.” He rose and straightened the papers to put in his briefcase.

  She plastered a fake smile on her face and turned. “Oh boy. Thanks. Press conference. Check. Following that, a meeting with my record company. Won’t that be fun?” She couldn’t help the sarcasm dripping from her tongue. “Then I have to kiss my band’s feet to make amends and then tell them they won’t be getting paid for a bit. After that, I get to return to the office and replace most of the hierarchy in the organization who was loyal to Cale and put out some feelers for a new manager. Right. And in between I’ll write another number one song, eat cake and get my nails done. No problem. I got this.” She collapsed into a chair.

  He grinned at her. “You’re something else. I’ll be here for you. Don’t worry.”

  It wasn’t really all that she was worried about. It was the having to pretend she wasn’t stressed and miserable.

  It was the torment of the very real question of whether to just give up her entire career so she could have Zach or to keep going and have bitter regrets.

  Both ideas ripped her in two.

  The Los Angeles Grand Hotel had become Leia’s home away from home. The urban chic, spacious rooms offered comfort and privacy, two things high on her list. One of their plush suites gave her enough room for her clothes, jewelry and guitar. The rest of the furniture, books, and family items from her Beverly Hills mansion would be put into storage in the next few days to set up the house for sale. Ryder had discovered that Cale’s secretary was efficiency on wheels, making many things easier to deal with.

  But she stepped out of the shower, loath to start her day. She was exhausted emotionally and physically and barely hanging on. She pulled a fluffy towel off the rack and rubbed it across her skin, staring at herself in the mirror as she did so. She’d lost weight and not in a good way and couldn’t find the spark inside to even care. Zach hadn’t seemed to care either as he’d kissed and licked his way across her body.

  A shiver of remembered passion flushed through her followed by the quick stab of pain. She shrugged into a plush, white hotel robe and padded into the bedroom, trying to escape her thoughts.

  She didn’t have time for this. Maybe by next weekend, she could go home for a few days, but not now. Depressed and melancholy was not the mood to be in when facing the press. Ryder coached her through what he wanted her to say at the press conference, pounding home upbeat and positive, steady and civil.

  To that end, she’d culled her clothes and come up with a gray striped suit she didn’t remember ever wearing and a burgundy lace blouse, modest and yet sexy. She’d hesitated over the combination, definitely not her normal style, but she was a business woman now in charge of her career and the livelihoods of dozens of people. She had to look like someone who had things under control, even though she was floundering in a big sea of insecurity.

  She lay back on the bed and battled the urge to call Zach, to hear his voice, to beg for him to come and be with her, to lend her his solid strength. It was a futile dream. He didn’t want any part of this world, her world.

  The press conference was being held in the hotel’s Marquis grand ballroom on the second floor in two hours. Ryder would be up from his room in an hour. She’d told her assistant not to come until closer to time. She planned to do her hair, makeup and dress on her own. She was tired of people fussing over her, even though that was their jobs.

  The knock on the door startled her. Was Ryder early?

  She shifted off the bed and tightened her belt. As the knock
came again, she looked through the peephole. A dark-haired man in a green room service uniform stood on the other side.

  She pitched her voice to be heard through the door. “I didn’t order any room service.”

  “No, ma’am, you didn’t. Mr. Murphy did.”

  Ryder ordered her breakfast? Geesh. Was it engrained in every Murphy male to feed her?

  She released the chain and lock, hesitantly opened the door and sucked in a shattered breath.

  Zach and Carlee stood beside the room service waiter.

  “Oh, oh, oh…” She couldn’t get anything else out before she burst into tears. She didn’t know whether Zach reached for her or she reached for him.

  “Shhhh, we’re here.” Zach pulled her against him, arms enfolding her, holding her tight.

  She couldn’t speak, couldn’t get any words around the knot of emotion clogging her throat. So she kissed him instead.

  If she’d had a moment to think, she might have protected her heart, but her defenses were down.

  Zach took over and kissed her as if he was starving.

  Carlee giggled.

  She broke the kiss and looked over. Carlee and the waiter’s faces were plastered with ear-to-ear grins.

  Zach rubbed a thumb over her lips, open hunger in his gaze. “Let’s get out of the hall.”

  She reached for Carlee and hugged her tight while Zach helped the room service waiter bring breakfast into the suite. She walked with Carlee to the table, while Zach tipped the man and shut the door.

  He walked up behind them and put his arms around them both, pulling them back against him. His lips caressed her temple.

  Her mind stumbled over the implication of the two of them here, now. The only way to be sure of what she was seeing in their eyes was to ask. “What are you doing here?”

  Carlee leaned into her and spoke before Zach could. “We came to say we’re sorry. We were stupid. We said and did a bunch of things that we shouldn’t have. Please forgive us.” She pulled away from the hug and separated herself from Leia. Zach put his other arm around her and held her tight cradled against him.