What Do You Say to a Naked Elf?

by Cheryl Sterling

  “Why are you skulking around?” Tivat asked as they negotiated between tents.

  Jane skipped to keep up with his long strides. She looked furtively to each side. “Skulking? Am I? Why aren’t we hiding behind things?”

  He chuckled. “The best place to hide is in the open. We’re just a couple out for a stroll.” To emphasize his point, he put an arm around her and drew her close. “Don’t struggle,” he said under his breath as she instinctively pulled away. “Your life depends on this.”

  Right, sure. At any other time, she’d cuddle with a green goblin and play smoochy-face. Tonight didn’t fit the bill, especially with Tivat as a goblin and Charlie’s jealousy being a mile wide. Even if he had been taken to Shallen. To lie in a dank, dark dungeon. Chained to a wall. Eating weevil-filled gruel and stale water. Open sores on his back. His wings shredded and useless.

  “Stop,” she cried, afraid of where her thoughts drifted.

  The goblin at her side did so. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  Jane shook her head. “Nothing, nothing to do with you, Tivat. I’m being a paranoid, freaked-out idiot.”

  He took her hand in his, a comforting gesture. “We’re almost there.” He pulled out a folded piece of paper and scrutinized it in the moonlight.

  “What is it?” she asked.

  He smiled. “Blacwin’s orders to bring the prisoners to Shallen. It seems there’s been a mistake. All this time, the goblins should have been looking for an Earthman, not an Earth woman.”

  Smart. She liked Tivat more and more.

  “Clever,” she said. “What do you want me to do?”

  He moved a step away. “Stay here.” At her protest, he said in hushed tones, “I mean it, Jane. I can’t have this reunion with your brother attract attention. You’ll have time later to squeal over each other and trade stories.”

  Not fair. She wanted to pout. But Tivat had been a criminal far longer than she; he knew the way to deceive the enemy. Maybe she could learn from him.

  “Okay,” she acquiesced. “Don’t take too long.”

  He held up his hand and mouthed, “Five minutes.” A moment later, he turned to a small fire burning in front of a tent separated from the rest.

  The negotiations took longer than he’d said. Jane hopped from one foot to another impatiently while trying to look unconcerned to any onlookers. None took notice.

  Finally, Tivat left the three guards and headed her way. He carried a rope tied to two figures. Kevin and the woman, Ashara. They stumbled as they walked.

  “Drugged,” Tivat whispered. He looked around, senses on alert. The guards still watched them. “Don’t say anything,” he warned.

  Jane pulled back the hand outstretched to Kevin, words of welcome dying on her lips. Instead, she tugged the scarf farther down and shuffled behind Tivat.

  They made slow but steady progress. After ten minutes or so, Jane heard the lapping of water—the nearby Lake Shallen. Tivat had briefed her that they’d use a boat to leave.

  A breeze blew off the water as they descended to the beach. It whipped the scarf off Jane’s head. At the same time, Rest, the brighter of the two moons, leapt from behind a cloud. A spotlight couldn’t have been more damaging.

  Jane chased after her scarf, the wind playing cat and mouse. She tripped over a root and sprawled in the dewy grass. As Tivat helped her up, she heard a voice from someone she’d long thought dead.

  “My queen, my queen!” he shouted.

  Capp’ear!

  Stunned, Jane clutched Tivat, panic and revulsion battling to empty her stomach.

  “He’s dead,” she cried.

  “Apparently not.” Tivat hefted her to her feet. Together, they swung toward the incessant bleating of her former captor.

  “My queen.”

  Capp’ear stood at the top of the hill, waving bound hands, his shackled legs moving six inches at a time toward her.

  “Could he be any more obvious?” Jane asked.

  “We’ll discuss it later.” Tivat propelled her forward until they reached the lakeshore. “Damn,” he swore. “The boat’s anchored west of here. We won’t make it in time.”

  Events accelerated. Curious about the noise, goblins poked their heads up. Capp’ear’s guards chased after him. Kevin, in the worst timing of his life, emerged from his drug-induced stupor and recognized Jane. Ashara did the same with Tivat, a dozen profanities spewing from her mouth. The moons blazed.

  “Get out of here!” Tivat shouted. He pushed Jane away while trying to wrangle the other two in the direction of escape.

  She dug her heels into the soft mud of the lakeshore. “I’m not leaving without Kevin.”

  “He won’t be any worse off than before. The plan depends on you, Jane, no one else.” The appeal in his green eyes almost changed her mind.

  God, why did he have to be so right? The plan. Always the plan. Leave her brother or save the world? Who made up these sucky rules, anyway?

  Lowth doesn’t make mistakes. Neither does the portal. If Kevin was here, it was for a reason.

  She shook her head. “No dice,” she told Tivat. “It’s all for one and one for all.”

  “Stubborn Earthwoman,” he said, reminiscent of Charlie. He sliced through the bonds holding her brother and Ashara.

  A nearby shriek stopped further argument. A goblin had Capp’ear in a choke hold. Another pushed past him, his liver-brown gaze locked on Jane.

  A blade gleamed in the moonlight.

  Always a knife, she thought.

  “My queen,” Capp’ear cried. He escaped from the first guard and pulled down the second.

  He never had a chance. A brief struggle ensued. Both goblins attacked Capp’ear. The knife plunged into him twice, in the soft tissue of his stomach. He screamed and collapsed.

  The guards, breathing heavily, stood over him. Then, wiping the blood from the knife, they looked at her.

  Tivat broke the tableau. He grabbed her arm and shoved her into the water.

  “Can you swim?” he asked.

  As if it mattered at this point. Shock at Capp’ear’s death ran through her. “Why?”

  “Because goblins can’t.”

  Jane plunged into the lake, a dazed Kevin close behind. She blessed all the trips her family had made to Lake Michigan in the summertime. She and Kevin could both swim like fish.

  “Where the hell are we?” her brother asked, more alert.

  “Lowth,” she said with affection. Disgruntled goblins gathered on the shore, watching them swim away. “Remind me to tell you about it sometime.”

  They found the boat and boarded. She had a small sail, miraculously dark against the night sky. The moons popped behind convenient clouds, and the small group sailed to the other side of the lake. The goblins, in their bulkier rowboats, couldn’t catch them.

  It took three hours to reach their destination. The city of Shallen, the heart of Malik, rose from the lake’s center, dimly outlined.

  Against Jane’s protests, Tivat shifted back into his elf form, naked again. The goblin clothes being too tight, he wrapped the scarf she’d worn around his middle, loincloth-fashion.

  Her opinion of his resourcefulness had grown. They’d be dead if he hadn’t taken charge.

  Ashara didn’t share Jane’s opinion. Instead of being thankful she’d been rescued, she spent most of the trip alternately arguing with or ignoring Tivat.

  Definite history between them, Jane thought. She turned her attention to Kevin, overwhelmed to have him back.

  “You don’t know how good it is to talk to someone,” he said. “It’s been gobbledygook since I landed in this place. Where are we?”

  Summarizing her adventures as best she could, Jane told him the events of the past seven weeks. Aware of the other two in the boat, she gave him an edited version of why she needed to go to Shallen, leaving out the royal heritage, I’m-going-to-have-a-baby stuff.

  Kevin shook his head. “Unbelievable. Or at least it was at one time. Since I’ve b
een here, I’ve seen things I thought impossible.”

  “How did you get here? And when?” She’d been dying to ask him since she’d heard of his arrival in Lowth.

  “Through the magical portal of Oz, how else? I thought he”—Kevin indicated Tivat—“was after Mom’s money. She acted so strange after you disappeared. Not grieving-strange. Weird-strange. Then I found out John Tivat was living with her. A man twenty years younger, who made trips with her to Galyans and Gander Mountain.” He leaned against the side of the boat. “I followed them one night. They carried enough camping gear to make L. L. Bean proud. The next thing I knew, I was in a forest. And captive of Her Highness.”

  “Her Highness?” Jane looked at Ashara. The elf woman intimidated her. She stood over six feet tall, with long, flowing red hair and violet eyes, and dressed as a woodland goddess. The clothes she wore would have scandalized someone on Earth, let alone here on the more prudent Lowth. A fawn-colored top exposed one shoulder and her midriff and complemented a leather miniskirt in the same hue. Her legs stretched forever.

  “She’s strong enough to whip your ass,” Kevin said. “A definite Bowflex woman. I didn’t understand a word she said when we met. We communicated with sign language. As soon as she found I’d come after Tivat, she had me hog-tied and helpless. Seems she’s not too fond of him.”

  “Yeah, no kidding. When did the goblins get you?” The wind, a nice steady breeze against their sail, tangled Jane’s hair. She pushed it from her eyes.

  Kevin looked at the sky. Dawn crept closer. Rest hovered near the western horizon. “Four days ago. Boy, was she pissed. I think she killed six or seven of them before they threw a rope around her. They brought us to the camp yesterday. I got the impression we’d be moving out soon. Probably to this Shallen place—” He stopped and stared at her. “Hey, you’ve got pointy ears.”

  Jane sighed. She laid a hand on her brother’s arm. “Yeah, there’s a story that goes with that.”

  She told it to him later, after they’d landed the boat and taken refuge in a series of caves on the northern shore of the lake. Tivat and Kevin pulled the vessel into a heavy stand of trees and obliterated any trace of its passage up the sands.

  “You’ve been busy,” Kevin exclaimed, settling on the cool floor of one of the caves. “I can’t believe Mom married an elf and lived here for three years.” He shook his head.

  “If things work out, I’ll marry Charlie and live here,” Jane said, keeping her voice low. Tivat kept watch outside; Ashara slept in an adjoining cavern. They wouldn’t move again until evening, at storm-the-castle o’clock.

  “How are you doing?” she asked, distracting herself from thoughts of Charlie and why she hadn’t heard from him.

  Kevin took her hand, as if sensing her turmoil. They’d always been close; at times it seemed as if they read each other’s mind.

  “I’m hanging in there,” he said. “It would be better if I understood what everyone said.”

  Jane pulled away, a small “oh” escaping. “I can help,” she said, smiling. She felt inordinately pleased.

  Crossing to her backpack, she rummaged in its depths. She’d seen something earlier when she’d pulled out her regular clothes and changed from the goblin disguise.

  “Here,” she cried in triumph. She held up a stitchtree thorn she’d stolen from Isleighah’s dispensary. “Charlie gave me an injection of this when I first arrived. It’s an anesthetic and will knock you out,” she warned. “But when you wake, you’ll understand Elven.”

  Kevin turned it over. “How does it work?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. Magic. It’s made by elves.”

  “Baked by little ’uns in a hollow tree?” Kevin joked.

  Jane hugged him. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

  He looked embarrassed by her affection. “You need

  someone to keep you laughing.” He held out his arm.

  “Shoot me up, elf-maiden.”

  “So what’s the plan?” Jane asked Tivat as they left the caves later. She didn’t feel adventuresome. The hot weather had made sleeping difficult. A storm brewed in the west, kicking up a breeze, stirring dust in miniature whirlwinds.

  “We head south,” he replied. Lines of fatigue darkened his eyes. Jane and Ashara had taken second and third watch, sparing Kevin, but Tivat had rested little.

  “For how long? You know I have to see Anjinaine before Blacwin.” She worried about the time crunch—find a way into the castle, locate Bryant’s older sister and establish if he had royal blood from Rodom, the last ruler of Malik. Plus they had to free Charlie and confront the wizard. All while avoiding detection from goblins and any other goons.

  “I’m aware of your schedule.” He sounded testy. “We’ll be there in an hour, provided the wind holds steady.” So far, luck had been with them; a stiff breeze blew at their backs.

  Jane hadn’t given much thought to his feelings. “What will you do when we’re through?” she asked, curious as to his plans.

  “It depends on how this works out.”

  “If it doesn’t?” She had serious doubts. The closer they got to Shallen, the more nervous she became. Her constant fear for Charlie hung over everything. Their telepathic communication sometimes misfired, but she’d never gone this long without hearing from him. Especially as they both faced danger.

  Tivat shrugged at her question. “Then I go home.”

  Home? “But aren’t you still a criminal? Stealing sheep or something?” He’d fled to Earth to avoid trial.

  He looked uncomfortable. “Yes, well, I’d sneak in, of course. Visit my family, then take off. Maybe travel to Mystgalen, to the east. Ashara’s originally from there.”

  Jane didn’t answer. Something was rotten in Denmark. He’d been too anxious to accept her offer to leave Isleighah. A man with his capabilities didn’t need help. Before she could investigate more, Kevin piped up from the back of the boat.

  “What exactly is the plan?” he asked, looking slightly green from the motion of the small vessel.

  The wind raised whitecaps on the lake. The sky, a pinkish blue, outlined the city of Shallen rising from the water. Instead of a traditional castle like Sylthia, it consisted of hundreds of individual structures, similar in appearance—thin, rectangular buildings, three to six stories tall. Each had a light on top, giving the impression of a miniature city. It reminded Jane so much of Earth that she wanted to cry.

  “All the buildings connect under the lake,” Tivat replied. “What you see is but a small portion of the city. We’ll enter through the north windmill and take an abandoned tunnel.”

  “Won’t it be occupied?” Jane asked, remembering the importance of the mills at Sylthia.

  “No.” Tivat shook his head. “A couple of years ago, Blacwin cast a charm on the natural springs that feed the lake. They all flow in the same direction, powering a central waterwheel beneath the surface. Gears and shaft were built from it, giving power to everyone. The windmills were awarded to their keepers. The owner of the one to the north died two months ago. It hasn’t been lived in since then.”

  Jane narrowed her eyes and glared at him. “You seem to know a lot for a common thief.”

  He smiled at her, a high voltage, Tom Cruise-Mel Gibson, I’m-so-cute-look-at-me smile. “I get around.”

  She didn’t say any more, but stewed over the conversation. Something Charlie said came back to her. “Tivat is in this as well.” Was he more than a common thief?

  They reached the windmill as the last light faded from the sky. Kevin and Tivat unmasted the boat and pulled the vessel into the living quarters. A few minutes later, Tivat opened a trap door that led to the tunnel.

  The four exchanged glances.

  “Well?” Jane asked at their hesitation. “Are we in this to win, or to not lose?”

  “I, for one, signed on to win,” Ashara said, her red hair blowing around her.

  Kevin nodded.

  Jane looked at the last holdout.

 
; Tivat smiled. “Let’s go.”

  Chapter Thirty

  Through chance or Tivat’s design, the stone tunnel emptied near a storeroom. Ashara popped the lock with little trouble and the group helped themselves to the clothing they found.

  “It’s old,” Tivat said, holding up a pair of trousers to his waist. “At least it’s not moth-eaten.”

  They all changed, a hat plopped on Kevin’s head to hide his nonpointed ears. The cloth felt coarse against Jane’s skin, quite unlike the finer weave she’d received from the fairies.

  “We separate now,” Tivat said when they’d finished.

  “What?” Shock ran through Jane. “No, we’re in this together. We don’t break up.”

  “Jane,” he said in an all too condescending way. “Think of what we have to do tonight. Provided we find Bryant’s sister, we have to free Charlie and confront Blacwin. And still not get caught. The odds are better if we split up.”

  “He’s right.” Kevin came to the defense of the elf. “Didn’t you say we’re a three-day journey from Isleighah? From your description, I’m sure this Eagar fellow left as soon as he discovered your escape. He’ll be here sometime tomorrow. Do you want to risk the chance of him turning up early?”

  Eagar. Jane had forgotten about him. How many things could she keep in her head? She hated to cave to the logic of Kevin’s argument, but she had to look at the big picture.

  “All right,” she conceded. “We’d better get started.” The enthusiasm she felt when they’d entered the tunnel faded.

  “Good.” Tivat nodded. “Ashara and Kevin will look for Charlie—”

  Jane’s head snapped up. “Now wait a minute. They don’t even know what he looks—”

  “How many Whelphites are being held prisoner?” Ashara asked. “If he’s here, I’ll find him.” Grabbing Kevin’s hand, she pulled him along the corridor.

  Jane turned to Tivat. He shrugged and said, “Now is the time to practice your skulking skills.”

  If she didn’t know any better, Jane could have sworn that the elf knew exactly where he was going. He didn’t hesitate over which passageway to take, but zigged and zagged for miles. Finally Jane smelled fresh air ahead.