Summer Nights

by Rachel Van Dyken

  “Yeah, we were inseparable from birth. I swear we even had our own language. And then we were swimming, it was summertime.” Her voice cracked. “We had just eaten a huge lunch and Mom said not to go in the deep end, but we were really good swimmers and he was practicing diving, so he kept practicing and then, he started yelling that his leg hurt. I tried—” She bit down on her lower lip. “I tried to pull him to the side, see my mom had just run back inside. I screamed for her while water went into my lungs, while I tried to get him to the edge of the pool. It felt like forever. And then everything went black.”

  “What?” I squeezed her hand. “What do you mean everything went black?”

  Tears dripped off her nose as she sniffed and took another long swig, all of us waited in silence.

  “According to my mom when she came back out of the house, I’d somehow been shoved up onto the pool edge, and he was holding my hand floating next to me.”

  “Fuck me.” Jackson swore breaking the silence.

  “He saved my life. It should have been me. It’s why my parents blame me, because that’s just who he was, he was just… this selfless lovable brother who would do anything for anyone. He had the best voice, could play the piano by the age of three, he was just, every single thing that I wasn’t. And then he was just… gone.”

  I pulled her into my arms. “You tried to save him, you can’t blame yourself for that.”

  Jen started rubbing her back.

  “I think it would be easier if my parents didn’t blame me as well. You don’t tell a six-year-old it’s your fault. Two days after his funeral they were in his room sobbing, and my mom started screaming ‘it should have been her, it should have been her. Why wasn’t it her?’”

  I was going to murder her parents. Plain and simple.

  “And you guys know the rest. I ran outside, I wanted them to mourn me, to love me, to hug me. But they heard the splash, and the chasm between us cracked into something insurmountable to pass.”

  “No offense, Ray,” Brax finally spoke. “But your parents are a bag of dicks, only worse, like I’m talking hairy, hairy—”

  Jackson slapped a hand over his mouth. “Stop talking about yourself, it’s gross man.”

  Brax shoved him while I just held her close, playing with her hair, trying to calm her as much as I possibly could.

  “Is it time to get drunk now?” she asked, inches from my face.

  I snorted out a laugh. “Yeah, I think if anyone deserves a night of drunkenness it’s you.”

  “Yessss.” Jackson did a fist pump. “Shots on me.”

  “Actually,” broke in Jen. “The shots are compliments of the shady campers who thought it would be okay to bring alcohol.”

  “Amen,” I muttered and then pulled Ray to her feet and twirled her around. “I’m so damn sorry.”

  She tilted her head and smiled, smiled so beautifully my chest ached. “Please don’t ever apologize for loving me that much.”

  “But I—”

  She licked her lips. I died a little inside. Hating that I was so close yet so far away from her touch. “You tried because you care, and you basically made my dad look like a dumb ass, so as far as I’m concerned, you’re my hero.”

  “Should I ride in on a lawnmower next time?”

  “Will you have theme music?”

  “I’m confused. Is there any other way?”

  She threw her head back and laughed. It was beautiful. “I’d never turn down a ride from you.”

  “Dirty!” Jackson shouted, lining up cups and pouring an ungodly amount of tequila into them. “And now, we party!”

  He handed each of us a cup and the lifted it up to the sky. “To Ray!”

  “To Ray!” we all yelled.

  She took her shot, turned to me, and then pulled my head down until I could almost taste the tequila on her lips. I could tell we were about to kiss, about to do something that would change us yet again, would shift us.

  “Hey!” Jackson’s shout was accompanied by some mad scuffling in the sand between him and Jen.

  She smacked his shoulder then gave him a shove that landed him on his ass. “Fuck off!”

  Ray pulled back, the moment lost.

  Jen launched herself and landed on Jackson before he had a chance to get up, straddling him and pressing open-mouthed kisses to his lips.

  Brax made a show of covering his eyes, but when Jackson groaned and hauled Jen closer, Brax spread his fingers and peeked through.

  Ray laughed and poured more shots. “Tequila, makes your clothes come off.”

  “Thank God!” Jackson said between kisses while Jen tugged at his T-shirt. He threw it over his head and drew a sharp breath when Jen dragged her nails along his chest. “Watch the claws!”

  “I thought you liked it when I use my finer snails…” She frowned and giggled. “That came out wrong.”

  I glanced at Ray. “Finer snails?”

  She snickered. “Some new sex challenge?”

  “Might be erotic,” I suggested. “Snail trails… Want to test it out?”

  “On your dick?” she asked, offering a sweet smile. “Because I’m thinking the odds of me touching a finer snail are up there with flying pigs.”

  Jen’s shirt came off, revealing her sports bra beneath.

  Brax whistled and crossed his arms. “Cool. Drinks and a show.”

  He patted the seat next to him, Ray laughed and sat.

  “You guys are horrible friends!” Jackson said between kisses.

  “We’re the best, actually.” Brax wrapped an arm around Ray, and I knew, that’s exactly what she needed tonight. Laughter. Friendship. Love.

  “NEVER AGAIN.” MARLO groaned from next to me.

  I was afraid to open my eyes, why was I so hot? A sliver of pain ran down the back of my skull as I slowly moved to a sitting position.

  Marlo was still moaning, rubbing his eyes with his hands, and cursing everything under the sun, but mainly Jackson and Tequila.

  “Hey, you’re the one who wanted to mix liquors.” Jackson winced and then grinned at me like he had a reason to.

  I frowned and then looked down by his side. Bra.

  Underwear.

  Clothes.

  I grinned and then covered my face with my hands and gave my head a shake. “Jen? You feeling okay?”

  “Ughhhh.” The blanket moved, I saw part of her cropped head, and then she tried to get up.

  “Bad idea.” Jackson dangled her bra in front of her.

  She grabbed it and turned bright pink.

  “Next time we fight, I’m feeding you tequila. She scratched a map up and down my back with her fingernails.” He laughed while Jen pulled the blanket over her head.

  “Where’s Brax?” Marlo’s voice was sleep filled, deep. Chills washed over me. Why weren’t we naked again? Why weren’t we doing that thing?

  Words. That’s right.

  And me.

  My parents.

  Brother.

  Yet, when I thought about everything, that same sense of horror didn’t wash over me. It wasn’t gone. The pain was still there, but it felt like someone had invented ibuprofen for the heart and given it to me in the shape of four friends I had never expected to make — Marlo included.

  Birds chirped around us while we all glanced at one another in confusion. We were still on the beach, all of us had crashed after a night full of drinking, laughter, and pranks. “Oh, no!”

  “What?” Marlo whipped his head toward me then winced. “What’s ‘oh no’ mean?”

  “Pranks!” I stumbled to my feet and then ran down toward the shore and burst out laughing. I laughed so hard I had to hold my stomach, and a whole new slew of tears ran down my cheeks from the hilarious scene in front of me.

  Brax in nothing but his boxers lying on a blow-up unicorn tied to the dock, with honey and bird seed on his chest.

  Jackson and Marlo flanked me on both sides and joined in.

  Brax’s mouth was wide open as birds fed all
over him.

  Yeah, he wasn’t going to wake up happy.

  Jen joined us, having accomplished dressing herself, though her shirt was inside out. I figured it wasn’t the time to tell her.

  “I vaguely remember something about the bird seed and parent trap.” Jackson rubbed his chin.

  I wiped the tears of laugher from my achy cheeks. “Remember? He said he was going to attract a bear but would survive the night because he was in the water.”

  “All that damn bear had to do was pull the unicorn in.” Marlo pointed out then frowned. “Would a bear even do that?”

  “Still drunk?” Jackson asked.

  Marlo moaned. “Yeah, think so.”

  Jackson jogged down the dock, Jen followed.

  And then it was just me and Marlo.

  I exhaled and turned.

  He was staring at me.

  His eyes burrowing into my soul.

  Even hungover he was pretty.

  It’s like the messy hair and crooked smile paired with his gruff morning voice made him that much more sexy.

  Words. Stop thinking about the physical.

  “You’re so pretty when you laugh,” he whispered gruffly, and then he reached for my hand and kissed it.

  I shivered.

  His eyes zeroed in on my mouth.

  I licked my lips and imagined them there.

  If I closed my eyes, I could imagine his hands all over my body.

  If I leaned in, I could have them.

  “Son of a bitch!” Brax yelled, shattering the moment. The yelling was followed by a loud splash and more laughter from the dock.

  I grinned and jogged down just in time to see Brax attempt to get back on the unicorn. The honey wasn’t helping his case, and he just kept sliding right back off.

  “He’ll tire.” Marlo burst out laughing while Jackson kept pulling the unicorn just far enough that Brax couldn’t quite get fully on it.

  “I hate all of you! ALL OF YOU!” he yelled and just gave up, held up two middle fingers, and then started swimming to the shore. Sideways.

  “He’s still drunk,” Marlo pointed out.

  “Nah, that’s just Brax.” Jackson chuckled “He can’t even walk in straight lines. Why would we have high expectations of his swimming?”

  “True.” Marlo nodded.

  Brax stumbled onto the beach, bent and scooped two handfuls of sand and then threw it in the air like he needed to show us how pissed he was. Without uttering a word, he plopped down half on and half off one of the blankets and held up both middle fingers again.

  “Think he’s mad?” I asked.

  “He’ll sleep it off,” said Jackson, shrugging. “Besides, he should be happy! He won the bet!”

  I froze. “The bet?”

  “Yeah,” Jackson grinned between me and Marlo. “He said if he survived the night you guys had to go on a date.”

  “A date?” I wondered out loud. “But we’re at camp?”

  “Yeah, you let me take care of that….” Jackson winked. “No backing out, you guys said yes!”

  “Wait!” I tugged at his shirt to keep him from jogging off. “If we agreed to a date, what did you and Jen agree to?”

  He patted my head like I was innocent then leaned in and whispered, “Three orgasms.”

  Next to me, Jen groaned like she wanted the earth to swallow her whole. Jackson wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close despite her constant hitting on his chest.

  “And a gentleman never backs away from a bet.” Jackson held her close. “Stop squirming, I’m the one who did all the work. Besides, you’re the one who started it by doing a strip tease.”

  “I did?” Jen paled.

  “Yeah, you asked me to call you Wonder Woman, and then I asked you to call me Batman, but in the Batman Dad voice, so hot…”

  “I want to die,” Jen grumbled.

  “Chin up, buttercup.” Jackson slapped her on the ass. Then his voice softened. “Let’s go get you fed so you get your color back.”

  I couldn’t help the smile that spread across my face as they walked away hand in hand leaving me with Marlo and a snoring Brax.

  “So…” I didn’t turn to look at him. I realized that sometimes I just liked being next to him, existing in his gravity. “A date huh?”

  “A date.” His hand found mine again.

  We walked toward my cabin.

  “We have two hours before breakfast.” He slid his arm from my hand to my back as he let me go in first. “I say we sleep and then kill one of the campers and steal their Gatorade, you down?”

  “Or we could just get it from the mess hall,” I pointed out, slumping onto my bed.

  “Where’s your sense of adventure?”

  “Out of prison, thanks.” I grabbed my pillow.

  He laughed and then joined me on my bed.

  I didn’t have to ask him to pull me into his arms.

  He just did.

  I didn’t have to tell him I loved it when he played with my hair until I fell asleep.

  He just did.

  And when sleep finally did come, I could have sworn he said. “I love you.”

  JACKSON SAID HE would take care of the date, which meant it was back to business making sure that the staff was getting rehearsals underway.

  I stopped by at noon and cringed when our Baby ran into Johnny’s arms, screamed, and then backed away like she was scared he was going to drop her.

  “Sara!” Jackson said from stage right. “You can’t scream every time you run at him, you’re not a banshee.”

  She gave him a confused look. “What’s a banshee?”

  Jackson clenched his teeth then shot me, a look that said, I’m going to lose it.

  Brax waved his hands. “Let’s try this scene again, and Sara at least try not to scream at Bryan, he’s doing the best he can.”

  Bryan puffed out his nonexistent chest.

  The scene started again.

  And yet again, when it was time for her to leap into his arms.

  A sharp scream.

  Not as long.

  Equally as loud.

  Ray chose that moment to walk in with a group of background dancers. They stretched to the side.

  I blew my whistle, gaining everyone’s attention as the music stopped. “Bryan, Sara, I want you to watch how it’s supposed to be done… RAY!”

  Her eyes widened and then she shot me a glare.

  Hah. Damn, I loved her glare almost as much as her smile. She walked toward the stage and joined me up front.

  “Music,” I called.

  She shook her head at me. “You may never have sex again. I hope you’re okay with using your—”

  “Shhh!” Jackson grinned at us. “There are children present!”

  “She was going to say ‘hand.’ Moving on,” Bryan said in a bored tone. “Just show Sara how to do it right so we can break for lunch.”

  Sara scowled. “He’s dropped me twice!”

  “Because your screaming scares the shit out of me! I don’t know if you’re going to jump into my arms and let me do the lift or if you’re going to nail me between the legs! You look possessed!”

  Her eyes narrowed.

  “Okay, then,” Jackson nodded to us. “Go break a leg.”

  Ray grumbled something about killing me under her breath, and then we were on stage. The music started.

  The background dancers weren’t rehearsing with the lead roles yet, they had the entire afternoon to go through blocking. Fun times.

  I nodded at Ray as I started dancing toward her. Technically, we were supposed to have dancers all around me, and then I pulled her into my arms as she threw her body back and did a circle around and lifted her left leg, I locked eyes with her and slid my hand up her thigh. I suffered for it. Because I hadn’t touched her in what felt like years, so touching her now was like playing with a live electrical wire.

  Blood pounded in my ears as she rocked her body against me, and then in sync she dipped her head back as
I ran my fingertips down her chest. My breathing slowed when she turned and my knuckles grazed her ribs.

  If I wasn’t careful I was going to be giving all the campers a real show. Thank God I was in jeans.

  I tried to squeeze my eyes shut and enjoy the music.

  Instead, as the thumping rhythm filled the air around us, all I felt was her against me.

  All I smelled was her skin.

  All I wanted was to devour her whole and throw her over my shoulder, walk her to a sturdy object and ask her if I could please just rip her clothes off. On cue, we spun into a pause and locked gazes. We were supposed to act like we were about to kiss.

  I wasn’t acting.

  The music shifted as we spun away from each other, and I performed a few spins and solo steps while she waited.

  Then it was time for the lift.

  I nodded at her.

  She smiled and rolled her eyes at me, but I could tell she was having fun, and with perfect grace she ran at me.

  I lifted her with ease and did a small circle.

  Applause erupted from the audience.

  I was still smiling when I set her on her feet.

  We didn’t need to keep dancing.

  The demonstration part was done.

  Except that was what we did.

  We kept dancing.

  She waved the backup dancers over.

  And suddenly we were skipping, blocking, and going straight on to another full rehearsal of the song.

  Things clicked into place as campers danced around each other and laughed. Sara and Bryan even joined in.

  Too soon, the music ended.

  I pulled in Ray for a hug. “You were perfect.”

  “Thanks for not dropping me,” she murmured against my shoulder.

  I laughed. “Yeah, well, thanks for not running at me screaming. I think that tends to scare testosterone away for fear of sharp objects, kicking, losing testicles… that sort of thing.”

  “We wouldn’t want that.” She grinned up at me.

  “No.” I let out a rough sigh. “This is killing me, you know that right? You’re so damn beautiful.”

  She ran her hands down my stomach.

  I shuddered.

  “Not playing fair,” I said with a clenched jaw.

  She just shrugged and then started to walk away. I grabbed her by the arm and tugged her back. “Are you flirting with me?”