The Ultimate Surrender

by Penny Jordan

  ‘Phil, it’s very kind of you to offer me the chance to manage this hotel,’ she began steadily, ‘but—’

  ‘But?’ Phil interrupted her, his eyebrows lifting. ‘You can’t be going to turn me down?’ he said with such obvious astonishment that Polly had to smile a little at his self-confidence. ‘There’s no way that running a hotel like Fraser House can compare to running a place like this. Apart from anything else, just think about how impressive it’s going to look on your CV. Manage this place for me, Polly, and quite literally the world will be your oyster; you’ll have every hotel chain in the world beating a path to your door.’

  ‘It sounds very tempting,’ Polly agreed. ‘But…’

  ‘Go away and think about it,’ Phil counselled her.

  ‘Phil,’ Polly protested, wanting to tell him that she had already done her thinking and made up her mind, but he was shaking his head and mouthing ‘Please’ at her as his phone started to ring.

  ‘Look, I’ve got to take this call,’ he told her quickly. ‘It’s from my bankers in New York. But please, Polly, think seriously about my offer. You don’t have to make an immediate decision. I can give you a week or so…’

  But what about Suzi? Polly wanted to ask him, but he was already turning away from her, and, sensing that he wanted privacy to speak with his bankers, Polly made her way to the suite door.

  As she took the lift down to the foyer her head was buzzing. There was no denying that the offer Phil had made her was one that most people would think she was a fool to turn down.

  As she stepped out of the lift she was so engrossed in her own thoughts that at first she failed to see Suzi.

  But the other woman had seen her, and was making a bee-line for her, coming to a halt just a little too far inside Polly’s own private space for Polly’s comfort. However, as she instinctively made to step back from the other woman Suzi moved aggressively towards her.

  ‘There you are,’ she announced. ‘I want a word with you.’

  ‘Suzi,’ Polly protested. ‘I think—’

  ‘Oh, I already know what you think.’ Suzi interrupted her savagely. ‘You think that just because he spent the night with you, just because he took you to bed, it means he cares about you. Well, I’ve got news for you. I hate to be the one to ruin all those little plans you’ve been making for happy-ever-afters, but someone’s got to tell you the truth. You mean nothing to him,’ she told Polly cruelly. ‘Nothing at all. You’re just someone he was using for sex because I wasn’t there.’ She gave a small, sharp-toothed little smile, her eyes full of angry contempt as she looked Polly up and down disparagingly.

  ‘He is a very highly sexed man, after all, and very good in bed…very good.’ She gave a small dismissive shrug. ‘But there’s much more to the relationship I have with him than just sex. He and I belong together, and if you think for one moment that I’m going to let someone, anyone—but least of all a woman like you—come between us then you are very, very mistaken.

  ‘He’s already asked me to marry him. Did he tell you that?’ she challenged, and then smiled triumphantly as Polly’s wounded gasp gave her away.

  ‘Well, he has, and not just asked me but pleaded with me,’ she added. ‘And of course I can give him so much more than you can. You are—how old? Close to forty—?’

  ‘I’m thirty-seven,’ Polly interrupted her shakily.

  ‘So, you’re thirty-seven.’ Suzi gave a contemptuous shrug. ‘I’m twenty-six. Do you really honestly think he could possibly want you? But then I suppose when a woman is as desperate as you so obviously are she’ll tell herself anything,’ she added disparagingly. ‘And, of course, he is a very wealthy man. I suppose a woman of your age has to think of her future…her pension,’ she taunted.

  Her pension…? Had she not been feeling so shocked and distressed, Polly could almost have laughed. She might be a full decade the other woman’s senior, but she was still a long, long way from having to think about her old age. Nor had she ever, or would she ever, look to a man to provide her with financial security.

  ‘He only took you to bed because he feels sorry for you,’ Suzi continued. ‘He told me himself that you’d been coming on to him, that you were gagging for it,’ she added crudely.

  Gagging for it! Polly actually felt as though she might be sick. The thought of Marcus even discussing her with someone else, never mind in such crude and cruel terms, tore at her sensitivities as sharply as though her flesh had been raked over by a leopard’s claws and each tiny wound was drawing blood, her self-esteem mortally poisoned.

  Even so, no matter what her feelings were, she had at least to try to defend herself, and she did so by taking a deep breath and telling Suzi quietly, ‘Only a few minutes ago you told me that he only took me to bed because you weren’t available. Now you say it was because he felt sorry for me. Perhaps you’d better make your mind up exactly what it is that did motivate him!’

  ‘I know what motivated him,’ Suzi assured her sharply, ‘and if you hadn’t made it pathetically obvious that you were available to him he would never…It’s no wonder Marcus has got such a low opinion of you.’

  Polly bit down hard on her bottom lip to stop herself from crying out in pain. She had no idea how the other woman knew about last night, although logically she knew there was only one way she could know. Marcus himself must have told her.

  Polly could feel herself writhing inwardly in self-loathing. Was that why he had left ahead of his early-morning call? Because he had been overwhelmed with remorse and longing for the woman he really loved, because he had wanted to make a clean breast of what had happened to Suzi before he left for China, to beg her forgiveness and—?

  ‘You might think you’ve been clever,’ Suzi went on venomously, ‘but you haven’t. What you’ve actually been is incredibly stupid. Men aren’t like us. Sex is just a game to them, a challenge and sex with a woman like you…’ She gave another dismissive shrug. ‘Like I’ve told you, I’m the one he loves. The one he’s going to marry.’

  Polly could feel her head starting to swim. She felt dizzy and nauseous and emotionally battered by the insults and rebukes Suzi had flung at her, as though she had actually physically abused her. The other woman’s aggression, whilst it might be understandable in view of her relationship with Marcus, was so alien to Polly’s own behaviour that Polly felt completely unable to deal with it.

  She had on occasion had to deal with unpleasant guests, but there had never, ever been anything, anyone in her life before like this. Perhaps she was weak and naive, she acknowledged; perhaps her life had been too confined and sheltered; but alongside her own deep shame at what she had done and the way she had succumbed to her love for Marcus ran an equally deep seam of distaste and, yes, even revulsion against Suzi. But Suzi was the woman Marcus loved.

  ‘I appreciate what you’re saying,’ Polly told her quietly, with as much dignity as she could muster, ‘but really, don’t you think it’s a subject you might be better off discussing with Marcus—?’

  ‘My, my, aren’t we the ladylike one?’ Suzi cut across what Polly was trying to say caustically. ‘Ladylike in bed with him as well, were you? All simpering “Yes, please” and “No thank you”?’

  ‘Well, let me give you a piece of advice. In future keep away from him. He’s mine, and unless you want me to make what you’ve done public…I’m sure that Briony would love Chris’s family to hear about the way her mother behaves and the kind of moral values she has, for instance,’ she threatened.

  The mild ache in Polly’s temples had become a full, throbbing tension-induced headache of mega proportions, the pain so intense that Polly could barely see straight, never mind think straight, but from somewhere she managed to find the presence of mind to tell Suzi simply, ‘I know that I ought to be feeling rather sorry for myself, but somehow you’re the one I feel sorry for, Suzi…’

  And then, without giving the other woman a chance to retaliate, she stepped quickly past her and headed for the hotel exit,
her head held high, her body under rigid control as she fought to conceal her trembling legs.

  Once outside Suzi’s eyesight, though, she couldn’t maintain the pretence. Her stomach was churning, her whole body shaking, her face so paper-white that a female passer-by actually stopped to ask her anxiously if she was feeling all right.

  ‘Yes…just a headache…’ Polly fibbed before hailing a passing taxi.

  She still had to check out of the hotel and collect her overnight case. The room, much to her consternation, actually held a faint, agonising echo of Marcus’s scent.

  The tears that burned the back of her throat and eyes felt like raw acid.

  What was she doing crying over him, a man who had not only been the cause of her betraying every moral cornerstone she had built her life on but who, in addition, had callously and cynically laid bare the intimacy of her feelings to the woman he really loved?

  She had never dreamed that Marcus would be capable of an act of such malice and degradation and she still found it hard to believe.

  ‘When are you ever going to learn?’ she asked herself out loud as she faced the mirror. ‘He was using you, abusing you, and you let him. You encouraged him. You deserve everything you got. You deserve Suzi’s anger and her contempt, and right now, knowing what you know about him, you should be thanking your lucky stars that he loves her and not you.’

  ‘You’re just someone he was using for sex because I wasn’t there,’ Suzi had taunted, and, even though she had known all along that that was what he was doing, having it put into words, hearing Suzi tell her that Marcus felt nothing for her, had torn her apart and left a huge gaping wound within her that she knew would never be properly healed. Never.

  How was she going to be able to continue to live and work at Fraser House now?

  But she didn’t have to stay there—not with Phil’s job offer on the table.

  The thought of leaving Fraser House wrenched painfully at her heartstrings, but she told herself that it was a punishment she fully deserved in view of her own folly.

  She had, after all, seen Marcus with Suzi, sensed the intimacy between them.

  But for Marcus to have made love to her out of nothing more than sexual necessity and spite was so far removed from the man she had thought him to be she could hardly bear to think about it.

  By the time she reached home she had made up her mind. She was her own person, and responsible for her own life. What was the point in exposing herself to even more misery and humiliation? Before she could weaken and change her mind she telephoned her solicitor, Richard’s family solicitor, who had known her all her married life.

  ‘You want to sell your share in Fraser House,’ he repeated when she’d told him what she wanted to do.

  ‘Yes,’ she insisted, explaining at least half truthfully, ‘Briony is at college now and Marcus is moving into his own house. I’ve been offered the chance to manage a much larger hotel and—’

  ‘Have you discussed this with Marcus?’ she heard Tim Webb asking her.

  ‘Not yet: he’s away on business in China at the moment and this offer came up rather unexpectedly, but…’

  ‘Well, I would certainly counsel you to do so, Polly. You and Marcus are, as you know, joint owners of Fraser House but—’

  ‘Yes, I appreciate that,’ Polly agreed. ‘All I’m asking you for, Tim, is your advice on how, legally, I should go about selling my share and withdrawing from managership of the hotel,’ she reminded him gently.

  ‘Well, as to that, the contract I drew up for you when you became the hotel’s general manager is pretty flexible and informal, as you know. At the time Marcus was anxious to make sure that everything was shipshape from a financial point of view. I’m sure I don’t need to remind you of the muddle Richard left his affairs in, and I know that Marcus was concerned that you and Briony should be financially secure.’

  Sensing that Tim was rebuking her, Polly felt her face starting to burn.

  The time of Richard’s death had been so traumatic for her that she had only the haziest recollection of the more practical side of things. Marcus had taken charge of everything, and whilst she could remember feeling that his behaviour had been rather high-handed at the same time she had also felt an undeniable sense of relief that he had taken charge for her.

  ‘I’m not planning to defraud Marcus, Tim,’ Polly responded sharply. ‘I simply want to know what the procedure is, what exactly I need to do to ensure that I’m free to accept this new position I’ve been offered. With the plans he’s got for his own life I think you’ll find that Marcus will be only too glad to have any kind of contact with me legally severed.’

  Appalled at what she was saying, what she might be giving away, Polly abruptly stopped speaking, but fortunately, either because he was too wise to comment or because he hadn’t realised the significance of what she had just said, the solicitor did not take her up on her incautious statement.

  He simply said, ‘I’m sorry. I’ll need to get the file out and go through it. I suspect a formal letter to Marcus should be sufficient to release you from your responsibilities as the hotel’s manager. So far as your financial involvement as co-owner goes, though…’

  He paused. ‘What exactly do you have in mind? If you’re planning to sell your share then I have to advise you that, from memory, I think the original documents specified that Marcus should be offered first refusal of any prospective sale of your share. So if you were thinking of putting your share on the open market, or if you have already received an offer you were thinking of accepting…’

  ‘No. No, nothing like that,’ Polly hastened to assure him. ‘The offer I have received is purely an offer of work, and has nothing to do with my co-ownership of Fraser House.’

  ‘Well, in that case, you might find it would be worth your while to think of retaining your ownership in the hotel. You and Marcus could appoint another manager, which would leave you free to take up this new job offer.’

  Another manager for the hotel…Polly caught her breath. Suzi was more than qualified for such a position, and indeed already worked in such a capacity for Phil Bernstein, but would Marcus want his new bride to work, especially if they were anxious to start a family? What was she doing to herself? Polly asked herself wretchedly as her mind remorselessly relayed to her taunting images of Marcus enjoying the prospect of becoming a father, his arm curved possessively around Suzi’s burgeoning body, pride and tenderness softening his eyes, his body turned protectively towards her.

  ‘No…’

  ‘What? I’m sorry?’ she could hear Tim Webb saying to her.

  ‘No, it’s nothing, Tim,’ Polly said apologetically. ‘I was just thinking of something. I’m sorry, what were you saying?’

  ‘I was just suggesting that I could perhaps draft a letter for you to send to Marcus, formally telling him that you wish to terminate your managership, along with another letter offering him first refusal on the sale of your share of the business, subject to a professional valuation, of course.’

  ‘Yes, that sounds a good idea,’ Polly confirmed hollowly.

  As she replaced the telephone receiver she told herself that she was glad that the decision had been made and there was no going back. That was just the first hurdle over, though. She still had to tell Briony, and to inform Phil Bernstein that she had changed her mind and she now wanted to accept his offer.

  She telephoned Phil first.

  ‘Good girl,’ he praised her. ‘I knew you’d see things my way…When can you start?’

  Polly couldn’t help laughing despite her misery.

  ‘I still have to formally terminate my managership with Marcus,’ she warned him.

  ‘A piece of cake. Tell him I’ll pay him whatever forfeit he wants. Anything just so long as he releases you…In fact, give me his number; I’ll give him a call myself.’

  ‘I can’t. He’s in China at the moment on business,’ Polly told him. ‘But quite honestly, Phil, I’d rather do things legally and p
roperly. My solicitor is drawing up a formal letter for me to send to him.’

  ‘Uh-huh; well, if you have any problems with him, any problems at all, just let me know. My legal guys are the best in the business…’

  ‘I’m sure they are,’ Polly conceded.

  ‘So if Marcus starts making things difficult, or giving you a hard time…’

  ‘I doubt very much that he’s likely to do anything like that,’ Polly sighed. ‘In fact, I should imagine he’ll be only too happy to terminate our contract.’

  ‘Well, Suzi said something about the two of you not getting on very well, but I thought…By the way, did you happen to see Suzi when you left the hotel this morning?’

  ‘Er, she was in the foyer,’ Polly told him.

  ‘Uh-huh. Well, she probably forgot she and I were supposed to be having a meeting.’

  Polly was tempted to say that Suzi appeared to have a very relaxed attitude towards her professional responsibilities, but instead she bit her tongue. Briony had hinted that at some stage Suzi and Phil had been more than merely employer and employee, and perhaps it was for that reason that Suzi felt able to behave in a way that she herself would never have dreamed of behaving towards someone who was, after all, her boss.

  ‘How long is it before Marcus gets back from China?’ Phil asked her.

  ‘I’m not sure,’ Polly confessed, unwilling to admit that she hadn’t even known he was going. Not that Marcus had any responsibility to tell her what his movements were, but in the past, when Briony had been at home, he had always kept her informed of where he was, giving her a contact number just in case she needed to get hold of him.

  Briony…

  After she had laughingly refused Phil’s suggestion that she drive back to London so that they could have a celebratory meal together whilst he outlined all the plus points of her soon-to-be contract with him, Polly picked up the receiver again and dialled her daughter’s telephone number.