BWWM: BEFORE I WAKE: A Bad Boy Billionaire Book Collection (African American Interracial Series)

by Scribble XO Books

  Her velvet folds wrapped tightly around me and fit me like a glove as I began to pump into her. She fell into a rhythm with me, pushing her hips up and down as our bodies slide together. We were both moaning and I had to pull her back down into a kiss to muffle our sounds. This was the most excruciating pleasure I’d ever felt in my life and I never wanted it to end.

  I ground into her over and over as the heat built to almost intolerable levels and the tension inside of me threatened to snap. I let out a grunt that was too loud but I was on the edge and my body was filled with a thousand pricks of tingling pleasure.

  “I’m so close baby,” I whispered against her ear.

  She nodded furiously. She was ready too. I tightened my grip on her sexy ass and began driving up into her at a frenetic pace. I slapped a cheek and she bucked against me with loud moan. My enthusiasm spurred her on and she returned my thrusts with violent ones of her own, burying her pretty mouth in my shoulder to drown out her screams as she rode me.

  Each time I pounded into her I ground against her swollen bud until suddenly I felt her tense against me. I held her tightly against me as we both came. She mewled into my neck and I groaned into all of that glorious hair spread out across my face. I had literally never felt anything like it.

  Our sweaty bodies were tangled up for what seemed like hours before she pulled her head up and looked at my face.

  “That was…so amazing,” she whispered, still breathless as she stroked my temple.

  I smiled back. “Amazing… awesome... the best...”

  She collapsed back into my chest and we lay there again for a long time as I played with my fingers and traced down her spine leaving goosebumps along the skin I touched. Suddenly she started to giggle with her face still pressed into me.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “Us,” she said, “Like two kids trying not to wake your mom and dad.”

  I chuckled too and said, “And Caroline is something else when she’s mad....”

  She stifled a laugh and pressed a kiss at the center of my chest. I finally felt like I’d found what I’d been looking for. Somewhere deep inside of me I knew there was still one piece of truth standing in our way…but I had no idea how to tell her.

  She lifted her head, her eyes sparkling with warmth. “I’m going to fall in love with you too.”

  AMARA

  It was a late December afternoon and Jackson and I had spent the day together getting his beach house ready for Christmas. We’d taken care of business and now we were in the middle of taking care of… well, each other…

  Jackson was leaning back into his recliner with his feet up as I bounced up and down on his cock. I made a lot of noise, but there was no one here but us and it felt so fucking good. I loved the way his big hands held my hips as I rose up and down on top of him. He let his own hips rise and fall in tempo with mine. It was hard and fast and I fucking loved it.

  He tugged on me suddenly and sucked one of my breasts into his mouth as he began to nibble on my hard nipple. I increased my pace, taking his slick cock to the center of me each time.

  “Oh fuck! Jack, I’m coming baby!”

  “That’s it, come for me.” I glanced down in awe. His blue eyes were darker now, somehow changing hues when we were together like this. His words rumbled against the breast he still had in his mouth. The heat and the vibrations of it egged me on and my body went tense just as I felt his cock swell inside of me.

  “Come with me!” I yelled out in a breathless voice. His grip tightened on my hips and his teeth clamped down on my nipple as we both came to a screaming orgasm. I was screaming, literally and I continued to ride him until we were both spent. He let go of my breast and I collapsed down into his arms.

  “Ugh you’re so good.”

  He laughed. “You’re the one on top baby. So far it’s been all you…and I can’t even imagine it being any better.”

  We laid there panting and holding each other for a while. I couldn’t help but think how excited I was about Christmas coming in only a few days.

  Jackson and I had shopped together for Nala and he’d gotten her a special doll that even the infamous Becky didn’t have. His mom and Roger had Nala today. They’d taken her shopping and to see Santa Claus. It was so wonderful to be a part of this loving family. I loved this man and I thought my heart would burst with joy…and Nala adored him too. He was so good to us and I sometimes forgot what my lonely life felt like.

  “I’m going to get some water baby. You want some?” He shifted us so he could stand, playfully slapping my naked butt as he did. I smiled at him and watched his muscles flex as he pulled up his boxers and hobbled to the kitchen.

  “Yeah, but I’ll just drink yours.” He laughed. I had a habit of saying I was fine and then eating or drinking whatever he had. It had become a joke between us. He went to get the water and I glanced over at the pile of mail on his end table.

  My eyes fell on something that looked like legal paperwork. Feeling guilty…but curious, I leaned in and took a look. I scanned it casually but before I reached the bottom of the first page I realized that it was a contract…for a fight in... New York City?

  “Hey babe do you…” he stopped as he crossed the room and saw what I was looking at. His eyes widened in surprise and he sat the glass down slowly.

  “Are.. are you... fighting again?”

  He came towards me cautiously, his eyes scanning the ground. What the hell was going on? I stood up and fished my clothes off the floor.

  “Listen baby, this fight is… I’m going to be ready, okay? It’s not until May and I’ll be in top shape by then and...”

  “What the hell? You told me no more fighting. Youlied?” I tugged my clothes on roughly, struggling to keep from losing it.

  He looked so gorgeous and soguilty. “I haven’t fought a single day since I’ve met you Amara and that’s the honest truth. But this one here baby?” He motioned to the papers.

  “It’s a huge deal - like a huge fucking deal. Johnny Banks is a top promoter and Santos is one of the best trainers around… I have a shot at theheavyweight title baby…”

  “Youlied to me Jack.” Couldn’t he see what this was about?

  His voice strained. “How could I tell you? I couldn’t stand the thought of losing you…but baby I want this so bad. I need this! I’ve gained the weight and I’ve been lifting with the guys...”

  “You had surgery in early September, Jack. May will be barely nine months after your surgery. You’re going to get in a cage with another animal who might snap…” I choke on the words, my anger reaching an all time high as it boiled over the edge.

  “And for what Jack?! A gold belt? Please don’t do this.” I knew I should just walk out but I wanted to give him a chance to make me understand… or change his mind.

  His jaw was hard and his eyes pleaded with me. “This is my shot baby…I need you to understand that Ihaveto do this. It’s not about the belt… There are other...”

  “I’ve put my trust in you. I let myself and my daughter fall in love with you and you’ve been lying to us all along. I’ve never felt so betrayed in my life. We are supposed to be working towards the SAME goal. The one where you heal and make a full recovery so you can go on with your life. Remember?” My chest pounds with pain and I turn away so I don’t have to look at him.

  “Baby…please listen…”

  “The only thing I’m willing to hear is that you’re not going to do this. Otherwise... I’m walking out that door.” Surely he won’t let me walk away. I knew how much he cared about us. He’d told me how much he wanted this...

  I heard a ragged intake of breath.“I can’t tell you that,” almost in a whisper.

  I finished buttoning my blouse and slipped on my shoes as my vision blurred with fresh tears. As I picked up my purse and keys I headed for the door. I paused with my hand on the knob.

  “I should have trusted my instincts. It was a mistake to get involved with you. I can’t believe you would
hurt me this way. You had me and Nala…why… why isn’t that enough?” And with that I left.

  There was nothing more to say.

  JACKSON

  NEW YEAR’S EVE

  “Holy shit man! You’re making amazing progress. Daddy must have been working over the break! Looks like we’ll be ready come springtime!”

  Santos had just watched me spar with Aaron. We were in the locker room as I unwrapped my knee and got ready to hit the shower. I can walk almost normally on it now. I still wear the wrap when I’m not in the cage. I just can’t do much jumping or bouncing around on it when I’m working out.

  “Yeah,” I said. “I’ll be ready.” I sat on the wooden bench nearby to unwrap my wrists. I still wanted this, badly…but the enthusiasm had taken a back seat to the misery I’ve felt over the Christmas I’d spent without Amara and Nala. It was fucking depressing and even my mother was furious at me for letting Amara walk away. I’ve tried calling her, but she won’t take my calls. I feel like my heart’s being crushed.

  “So, Jack, what are you doing tonight for New year’s Eve? Do you and the lady have any big plans?”

  And there goes the knife to the gut. “No. We uh…shit... We’re not seeing each other any more.”

  Santos blinked in surprise. “Aw, no way! You were head over heels when we spoke a few weeks ago. What happened?”

  “I’m an idiot,” I said slamming down the strands of tape.

  “She doesn’t want to see me fight and she doesn’t want to be involved with me as long as I am fighting. But the biggest problem is the way she found out. I lied to her about it… I was trying not to hurt her and I fucked it all up!”

  “Does she know why you think you have to do this?”

  “You mean did I tell her about... Don?”

  “Yeah.”

  “No, I didn’t fucking tell her! That’s so embarrassing. Tell my woman that I’m a fraud? That I’m not really a champion? Hell no I didn’t tell her.” I swallowed the disgust. It was already bad enough I’d lost my dignity in the cage. No use in throwing away my pride too. And to Amara? How would she even look at me if she knew my little secret? I shook my head, there’s no way I could ever tell her that.

  “Don’t you owe her that much, man? I mean…she might still be pissed that you lied, but maybe she’ll understand a little more about why you’re so driven to do this. Talk to her man, tell her you’re sorry for not letting her in. You haven’t told her the whole truth yet.”

  My phone buzzed beside me.Mom.

  Santos clapped me on the shoulder and said, “Man, you have a happy new year and think about what I said, okay?”

  I nodded towards him.“You too. Be safe.” I picked up the phone and cradled it to my ear.

  “Hey Mom.”

  My mom and Roger went on a cruise every year for New Years. I could hear the music and commotion in the background. She yelled into my ear.

  “Hi Honey! I wanted to make sure you’re not spending New Year’s alone! Have you made up with Amara yet?!”

  “No Mom. She still doesn’t want to see me.” Why was everyone so bothered with asking me about her?Maybe because you blabbed on and on about how she’s everything good on God’s green earth?

  “Are you just going to let her go honey…or are you going to do what you do best - fight? I thought my son was a fighter?”

  I chuckled. “Who do you want her for Mom, me or you?”

  “Both of us,” she said warmly. “I really like her Jackson - more than any other woman you’ve been with and she made you happy. I also know you love that little girl. Roger and I do too.”

  I took a deep breath as I felt the seize in my chest. “I’ll try Mom. I love them both.”

  “I know you do. Use that fighting instinct and don’t just sit back and let her go.”

  Smiling I said, “Thanks Mom. You and Roger have fun on your cruise and don’t worry about me. I’ll work it out. Happy New Year to you both. I love you.”

  After I showered and dressed I wondered pathetically downtown to a Mexican food place I liked. I sat down and ordered. I looked up at the television that was playing the New Year’s Eve revelries from all around the country. Every frame they showed had a happy couple in each other’s arms.

  I looked over at the bar…everyone had someone and everything reminded me that I didn’t have Amara. I threw enough money down on the table for the meal I didn’t get yet and got up and left. I can’t fucking take this anymore.

  I drove crosstown to Amara’s house at too rapid a speed. Luckily the police were busy and the LA streets weren’t as crowded as usual. I got there around eleven p.m. and my palms were sweating as I knocked on the door. A few seconds later it was pulled open by a middle aged black man.

  I guess I looked dumbfounded but he just smiled.“You must be Jackson.”

  “Dad who is at…?” Amara came of the kitchen carrying a bowl of popcorn. My heart skipped and she froze when she saw me. Nala suddenly shot across the floor from behind her mom squealing out my name. I opened my arms and she jumped into them.

  “Jacky, Jacky, Jacky!”

  “Hi baby girl! I’m so happy to see you! I missed you like crazy.” I kissed her cheek and she squeezed my neck pretty tightly for a little girl.

  “I missed you too. Why didn’t you come over for Christmas?” She frowned innocently. I looked at Amara. She looked on the verge of tears as she glanced between me and Nala.

  “Well… Nala… I’m sorry about that. My knee was giving me some trouble that day…but if it’s okay with your mom I’d like to make it up to you soon. I have lots of presents for you.”

  “Lots!” she exclaimed with a big expression.

  I smiled. “Yeah, lots. Princesses always get lots of presents from their loyal subjects.”

  She put her small hands on my face then and kissed my cheek. “Hooray! Thank you so muchhhh!” I was so choked up that I could barely talk as I set her down.

  “Ok, now. By the way, why are you still up so late?” I patted her head and she wiggled in a random toddler dance.

  “Papa came to spend New Year’s with us! We’re watching the crystal ball drop all the way in New York!”

  I looked up at Amara. “Can we talk?”

  Her beautiful eyes bore into me. God, I missed this woman so much.

  “Dad, would you mind taking Nala in to watch the program? I’ll be there soon.”

  Her father smiled and took Nala’s hand. Amara handed him the popcorn as he passed and then she turned back to me and jerked her head towards the kitchen. I followed her in and I took a seat at the kitchen island. She hovered nearby and my hands ached to hold her close.

  She crossed her arms and peered at me through her lashes.“What are you doing here Jack?”

  “I’ve fucking missed you baby!” I whispered harshly. “I… I can’t do this without you, Amara. None of it…I know you hate it, but for me this is about…. my name. I can’t let them destroy me like that baby…”

  “What do you meanthem? Who is trying to destroy you?”

  “That night, after I got hurt? I found out that... I was neverreallya champion. My trainer Don admitted that he and my team were paying fighters off to lose…betting on me and paying off referees…it was a big fucking mess. And I had no idea this was going on. But, the bottom line is that I came away from it all feeling like a big fake. I felt like I hadn’t earnedanything…and I felt empty, Amara.”

  She remained still, listening closely.

  “When I found you, I knew that what we shared had been missing in my life and your belief in me filled so many spaces in my heart. You and Nala both. But baby there is still this huge part of me that does have something to prove. There’s unfinished business there and I have to stay in this…to prove I am what I’ve always thought I was…arealchampion…a fighter. I shouldn’t have lied to you, but you were so set that you wouldn’t date a fighter… I told myself that hopefully once you got to know me it would be okay but then I fell in love with you.
I’ve never been scared of anything…but I was terrified of losing you. Please Amara…please give me another chance. Stay by my side.”

  Her eyes moistened with tears. “You should have told me the truth. I should have had the option to at least decide to work with you, had I known all the facts. Do you understand that’s what hurts so badly here? You led me to believe that you were the man you said you were so I let myself fall. You knew how I felt about your sport.”

  “I do…I really do understand that. It was never my intention to break your heart. I never thought about it like that. I love you so much Amara, I promise you’ll always know the truth and always have a right to choose… just please... give me another chance to prove that to you.”

  She watched me in silence.

  “If we do this, then while you’re training you’ll listen to your therapist too - not just your coach. If I think you’re too aggressive on your body, we all stop.”

  I nodded. “Yes. I’ll listen to every word. And so will the team.”

  A small smile lifted on her face. “You’re so lucky I’m in love with you, Jack.”

  “I know.” I had tears in my eyes now and my heart swelled with love. I leaned forward and pulled her between my legs. I prayed she wouldn’t pull away. She didn’t but instead rested her hands on my shoulders. She pressed her sweet lips into mine and just as we began to deepen the kiss, a little voice brought us out of it.

  “Jacky, the countdown is starting!”

  We laughed. I looked at Amara and she rolled her eyes in amusement.

  “You’d better hurry. I’d be willing to bet Papa has already eaten most of the popcorn.”

  With an overwhelming sense of relief, I rose and took the hands of the two most beautiful ladies in the world and I let them lead me into the New Year…gratefully and full of excitement and hope for the future.

  We snuggled on one end of the couch as her father sat in the recliner and we all watched the ball drop together. When the clock struck midnight we each kissed and hugged Nala and when she went to hug her Papa, I took the opportunity to kiss her mother… God I love her.