by Marian Tee
Most guys would have offered their life by now just to know her name.
Yet all Park Jin did was nod back at her, looking down more frequently than he should.
Her eyes narrowed but she managed to still sound sweet as she asked, “Something the matter?”
Park was about to answer when Violet chose that precise moment to release his dick so she could slowly start sucking on his balls.
Sweet mother fucking---
“Candy Crush.” It was the only excuse he could think of.
Debbie’s smile thinned. “You’re playing Candy Crush now?”
“Uhh…”
He was looking even more distracted now. Damn. Why was it that there was always something wrong with the hottest-looking guys? They were either gay or taken. Or in this case – otaku-weird. But, Debbie reminded herself, no one back in her university would know Park Jin was this weird. All they’d see – if she managed to get him to ask her out – was that Park Jin had fallen for her charms.
Like all the other boys did.
She resumed her friendly tone. “Maybe I can give you life if you need it?”
Park’s answer was once again halted, transforming mid-way into a gasp as Violet’s mouth returned to his dick and she started flicking her tongue against the slit on the head of his dick.
Shit.
“Do you?”
“Do I what?” He could feel his loins tightening, knew it was only a matter of time before he was going to come.
What was wrong with him, really? This had to be the most embarrassing incident of her life, with a guy actually choosing some stupid game over her. Debbie succeeded in keeping the smile in place even as she all about snarled, “Need life?”
Violet sucked hard, squeezing his dick at the base.
“Yes!” Park growled out as he came, his hips nearly pushing Violet back against the wall as he poured out his cum.
Debbie almost stepped back. He didn’t have to shout it that loud! Park Jin was such a weirdo. He was gorgeous – but he really was too weird for her.
“Okay, I’ll give you one.” As she pulled out her phone from her bag, she made another attempt at small talk as she asked, “What’s your level, by the way?”
“Ah…Level One?” It was hard to think, not when Violet’s warm mouth, her throat working to take in all his cum, was just making his body come harder and longer.
Debbie almost dropped the phone. “You’re at Level 1 and you already need life?”
Life. Yeah, he fucking needed life after the mind-blowing orgasm Violet had just given him.
He glanced down.
She smiled up at him, her eyes twinkling in a way that had Park’s own eyes narrowing. When she had that look---
Violet crawled out of the desk and slowly got to her feet.
Debbie’s jaw dropped when she saw a girl come out from somewhere under – the same girl everyone had told her was Park’s ‘special’ friend. She watched Violet York touch the corner of her lip, and that was when Debbie noticed the drop of something white and cream-like on the other girl’s face.
Shit, was that---
“Park just died a little a while ago,” Violet said sweetly. Outside the booth, she could hear everyone staring and whispering excitedly as they took in the sight of her. “But he won’t be in need of that kind of life if you know what I mean.” She turned to Park and patted his cheek. “Right, Park?”
The vibes coming from each girl was enough to clue him in. And this early after his orgasm, Park was feeling more than mellow enough to play along with Violet. “Right.” He pulled her close, nuzzling her neck, loving the way his scent clung to her skin.
“My kiss, please,” Debbie snarled out as she slammed her bill on the counter.
Violet, arching her neck so Park could kiss her some more, pushed the bill back. “Sorry but I don’t think he’s in the mood to kiss you.” She wagged her fingers in a dismissive motion. “Better luck next time, you nymphomaniac hen.”
Park was still chuckling even as the other girl stomped off, red-faced with rage. “Nymphomaniac hen?” he echoed.
“Long story,” Violet answered as she reluctantly pulled away from his hold. She glanced at the line outside and her shoulders drooped. There were about 20 more girls waiting to kiss him on the cheek.
Park followed her gaze. “There’s no need to be jealous. I don’t fucking want them.” He caught her wrist and whirled her back so quickly into his arms it made her gasp. “I just want you.”
Violet smiled up at him, knowing how much it had cost Park to say that. “Just me?”
He nodded. “For now.”
She tried not to let that get to her. “For now.”
Chapter Sixteen
“It’s your fault, you know,” Betty murmured laughingly.
It took all of Violet’s efforts to stop glaring at the sight of Park with a nearly hysterical crowd of girls around him. And he was taking it all in, the jerk!
Violet had thought the kissing booth incident between her and Park would get everyone to back off. But if anything, it just seemed to make the unattainable Park appear even more attractive.
She glanced at Betty apologetically when she realized that her friend was still talking. “Sorry. I didn’t quite catch what you said.”
Betty laughed. “Of course you didn’t. You’re too busy being jealous.”
Violet could only smile weakly.
With their professor leaving for an emergency call, she and the rest of the class, together with those like Park who were sitting in, had unexpectedly earned a free period.
“You’ve made him human, you see,” her friend continued. “He’s more approachable now.”
“Congratulations to me, then,” she mumbled. Violet’s head dropped onto the cradle of her arms as she slumped over her desk. She closed her eyes with a sigh. Sometimes, she felt like making Park realize he was in love with her was as impossible as turning her heart into stone. Sometimes, she felt like she was simply deluding herself.
Maybe, Park wasn’t truly in love with her. Maybe he had been telling the truth when he told her he wasn’t ever going to love a girl.
Maybe it’s time to stop beating my head against a wall, she thought.
Maybe I should just start working on making myself fall out of love---
“Violet?”
Her eyes flew open. “Park!”
He scowled. “What are you sounding so guilty for?”
He was standing against the light and right that moment, he looked very much like an angel in her eyes. The dark dye had finally washed off, and his hair was now blindingly light like a halo.
Park did look an angel – or at least he did when he wasn’t scowling like he was now.
Her lips twitched.
Park saw it. “What’s so funny?” He crossed his arms. “And are you feeling okay?” His voice was gruff.
“Huh?”
“You had your head down on your desk,” he muttered, not quite meeting her eyes. “I thought you had a headache or something.”
She gazed at him and sighed. Then she laughed a little at the hopelessness of it all.
Park’s scowl became even darker. “Violet! Stop creeping me out! Are you alright?”
“Just a little tired,” she lied.
“I told you to stop working so hard, didn’t I?” He gave the guy sitting in front Violet a look. It was enough to have him scurry away. He took the other guy’s seat then reached out for her head.
Her eyes closed involuntarily as Park’s relaxing fingers worked its magic on her. She heard the other girls sigh in envy.
“Feel better now?” he muttered then added hastily, “And I’m charging you for this, so don’t think I’m doing this out of the kindness of my heart.”
He was doing his best not to show he was concerned about her but he was. She could feel it. In fact, she was pretty sure a few others could feel it, too.
How could she stop loving this guy when he was showing without words he
loved her? And how could she start loving him properly if he could never admit to himself he loved her?
* * * *
Something was fucking wrong again.
He wanted to lash out every time he felt his world unsettling at the mere sight of Violet’s unsmiling face. This was wrong. This - this feeling of wanting everything to be always all right with Violet was not something he was supposed to feel.
Usually, she would talk nonstop whenever they were together. She’d nag him to hold her hand while they crossed the street and things like that. But now---nothing.
She had been like this since her last class, which he had sat in so he could see her, be close to her. Why he felt like that, he didn’t really want to figure out. For now – admitting to himself that he was feeling concerned over another person’s feelings was enough.
Park checked his watch. “We still have about an hour to kill.” Then he added casually, “Maybe you want to go shopping?”
“No, but thanks for asking,” she replied.
He stopped dead in his tracks, causing Violet to bump into Park’s back. She frowned up at him and was surprised to see a gaping expression on his face. She blinked. “What?”
“You turned down shopping.” He spoke the words like she had just committed murder in front him.
Violet had to laugh at that. “So?”
He shook his head slowly. “Are you okay, Violet? Are you feeling sick?”
She rolled her eyes. “Stop exaggerating.”
“I’m not,” he said in the same serious tone. “You turned down shopping, Violet. You! The girl who forced me to ride the train for hours just to check out a tiny store selling seashell headbands---”
“They were nice headbands!”
“The fare cost us more than those headbands,” he retorted. He shook his head again. “You’re that obsessed with shopping and yet here you are---”
“Okay, now you’re pissing me off!” She scowled. “I just don’t feel like going shopping, okay?”
She muttered ‘freaking rude blond gorilla’ under her breath but he pretended he didn’t hear her.
“Why?” he demanded. “What’s wrong?”
“Because!”
“Why don’t you just let me know what’s wrong?”
She glared at him, stomping her foot in anger. “Because!”
He was beginning to get furious as well. “Are you hiding something from me?”
“Here we go again,” she said before she could stop herself. “How many times do I have to tell you, Park? I’m different from the girl who hurt you.”
Park’s face darkened. “That was a long time ago,” he said icily, “and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t bring her up every time you feel like throwing a tantrum.”
“Aren’t you throwing a tantrum, too?” Violet knew she really should stop talking but she couldn’t. Her temper always did get the better of her. She was so sick of feeling depressed because Park didn’t love her. She hated him for making her feel insecure, and she hated herself for blaming him when he hadn’t really done anything wrong.
Park gritted his teeth but it wasn’t enough. He growled, “Look, you noisy---”
She let out an incredulous laugh just before snapping loudly, “Ha! Look who’s talking!”
“I was just stupid enough to be concerned about you. I wanted to know what’s wrong. I wanted to make you feel good. That’s why I asked you if you wanted to go shopping! But now I don’t want to. Anyone would be crazy to want to spend time with you in your mood.”
“Crazy?” she screeched. “I’m the one who’s crazy for wanting to spend time with a moody, inconsiderate Nordic ogre like you! A lot of guys are after me---”
“Guess what?” he cut her off. “A lot of girls are after me, too!”
She saw red. “Then you know what? Go spend time with them! I don’t care!”
“You know what? I’ll fucking take you up on that so go have a fucking nice day on your own!”
“Have a fucking nice day, too!” She shrieked loud enough to have everyone in the vicinity covering their ears.
Park crossed the street and stalked off.
She stalked off, too, making sure not to look at her left because Park would be there, taking the same path since they were both heading to work.
Both of them continued to ignore and scowl at each other when they reached the store. Everyone left the two of them alone, used to Park and Violet fighting like cats and dogs.
Every time Violet’s gaze strayed to his, meeting his gaze accidentally, she had to harden her heart so she could look away. Even if this was her fault – and there was a big ‘maybe’ to it – she was always the first to say ‘sorry’! This time, he had to apologize to her first or maybe there just wasn’t any point to her loving him.
* * * *
Why wasn’t she still talking to him?
By now, she should have been making subtle overtures. By now, Park should have been pretending to be gruff before almost giving in right away because in truth he was relieved to have her back with him. But Violet wasn’t doing anything right now, not one little thing to make Park feel that she cared about getting their fight over and done with.
And now, they were about to go home and she still wasn’t talking to him.
It was late and Park worried about her. What if she was determined to drag this whole silly fight out? He couldn’t even remember why they had gotten into a fight in the first place.
He turned around and almost had the shock of his life when he found Violet reaching for the knob of the back door exit at the same time.
She stepped back.
He stepped out first but he held the door open for her.
“Are you going home?” Park snarled out when she was about to walk past him.
“Yes,” she snapped.
He didn’t say anything else. But he also made sure he kept pace with her from the other side of the street, ensuring her safety.
She stopped walking when she realized what he was doing. Why did he care so much yet still insist that he didn’t love her? He was making her mad in every sense of the word!
“Stop following me!” Violet shouted over the honking horns of the vehicles stuck in a traffic jam between them.
“I’m not!”
“Yes, you are!”
Park crossed the street, sick at how she just kept screeching and screeching at him this day when earlier, he had seen her acting all nice and sweet to Jun-Yee. The mere memory made him grit his teeth. “Why are you so fucking angry?” he demanded, bending down to stare at her eyes.
“If you have to ask, there’s no point in answering!”
He swore. “Isn’t that just a typical woman’s answer? I’m asking,” he bit out, “because you’re driving me goddamn insane.”
Violet kicked him in the shin. She didn’t know why she had to do it. But she felt like doing it. No, she had to do it. And when he was groaning in pain, she said, “I’m angry because I’m so tired of making you fall in love with me. I love you and I’m really, really tired!”
Then she ran away.
The shock was enough to make Park forget the pain. She loved him?
Chapter Seventeen
I can’t believe I said that. The thought, the memory of what she did, made Violet moan for the 22nd time in the past hour. She called for another order of sake, desperate to forget what she had just done.
“Do you know how long I’ve been looking for you?”
She looked up. Park was more disheveled than usual. Unfortunately, it only made him look more handsome in her eyes.
The thought made her want to bang her head on the table. How. Desperately. In. Love. Could. She. Get.
When Violet didn’t bother responding, Park sat down in front her. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he half-shouted. He was furious beyond reason. He had thought something bad happened to her, dammit. She had been MIA for hours. It was pure luck that he had thought of looking for her here.
> And what was she doing?
Park refused to feel guilty for driving Violet to drinking. Stupid banshee, he thought. He gritted his teeth when a waiter served her another order of sake and which Violet drank in one gulp.
He grabbed her arm. “Stop drinking!”
She wrenched away. “I can do whatever I want!”
“Stop acting like a crazy bitch again, for God’s sake.”
Violet laughed without humor. “You’re half-right anyway. I’m crazy. I’m crazy for actually falling in love with a guy like you.”
It took him a second to reply. It still made his head go blank to hear the words. He didn’t let himself think much about it though. If he digested what those words would truly mean to him, he’d be crazy, too. “You’re not in love with me,” he said firmly. He stood up, slammed a couple of bills on the table, and hefted her on one shoulder.
The other patrons glanced at them as Violet shrieked. “Ignore her, she’s crazy,” he said with a hard look at anyone, knowing he was intimidating enough to ensure that nobody would bother them.
She kept on shrieking until they reached the dorm. He greeted the doorman politely, ignoring the other man’s wide-eyed look. Park went straight to his room and slammed the door shut. Then he threw her on the bed.
She reacted as he expected she would: she reared up immediately and attacked him, scratching and clawing like a wildcat.
“Stop! Dammit, ouch! Stop!” Park did his best to restrain Violet without hurting her or leaving his face too vulnerable.
Suddenly, she stopped.
Violet sprang away from him and landed on the bed, her back to him.
It was eerily silent. Park had a strange feeling he was acting out a movie where he was the victim and she was…what? Sadako or some other ghost or possessed individual?
WHYYYYYYYY?
Holy fucking shit! Goosebumps broke out of his skin at the creepy-sounding wail. What was wrong with her this time?
He grabbed her by the shoulders, unable to help flinching as he prepared himself to see evidence of demonic possession or something equally ghastly.
WHHHHHYYYY?
Violet turned to face him.
“What the fuck?” He choked on his surprise as Violet stared at him with large, tear-filled eyes. “Why can’t you be in love with me?” She wailed out the words like a five-year-old kid having a temper tantrum. “Am I not pretty enough?”
