Holding My Breath

by A. M. Hartnett

  So far.

  She peeled off the jacket and tossed it to the floor, then plucked the buttons of her blouse. He’d already had a preview, and anticipation showed on his face as she opened the shirt. He didn’t move, not when the shirt joined the jacket on the floor, and not when she turned and unzipped her skirt.

  Nearly naked now, she turned back and resumed her pose with her hands on her hips.

  He lowered his gaze to her legs. ‘You weren’t wearing those when I came into the hotel tonight.’

  ‘The nudes are stuffed in my purse. I thought the white stockings were a much better match.’

  ‘I agree,’ he said, then got to his feet.

  She kept her pose in spite of the quiver running up her spine as he circled her. She could feel the appreciation beaming out of him, and lost any worry she’d had about going too over the top with the saucy little number.

  ‘Is this new?’

  ‘The stockings are. The rest has been … away. I thought today would be a good time to bring it out of hibernation.’

  The truth was that she had almost burned the scanty merry widow when she’d come across it a few months ago. She’d been a little drunk and feeling sorry for herself, and at the time a ritualistic barbecue in the backyard had seemed like a tremendous idea. Either she’d changed her mind or passed out before she could follow through, because in the morning she found it rumpled on the floor. She’d put it back in the dresser where she had found it, and it had been forgotten until that morning.

  ‘You should wear something like this all the time,’ he said, and gave the garter a little tug. ‘I can’t tell in the orange light: is it silver?’

  ‘Lavender.’

  ‘Like something a virgin would wear on her wedding night. Not a good girl, mind you; not the type who is all hands-off until she has a ring on her finger, but the type who has been pretty free with the blowjobs and a bit of fingering but enjoys the chase too much to give it all up until she knows it’s worth it.’

  ‘If you think I’m a virgin, Quinn, I think you need your head examined.’

  ‘But you want to give the same impression. You wore this so you could be a total prick-tease to me.’

  He came around, right in front of her, and tilted her chin up to look at him. She managed to maintain her gaze for about thirty tense seconds before lowering her lashes.

  ‘Don’t worry, Molly. You’ll have your chance to tease my cock all you want once I’m done with you.’ He slipped both his large, warm hands round her face and leaned close. ‘I can be a tease, too, can’t I?’

  He left her light-headed with wanting to be kissed, and returned to the bed.

  ‘You remind me of someone, you know. About ten years ago there was a woman in Vancouver who would dress like that. She was a little older than you, single and successful, renowned for being a perfectionist in her field. She was a perfectionist in every aspect. If you couldn’t do it right the first time, you were out on your arse.’

  She watched him finger the cuffs he’d made at his elbows and itched to straddle him, to unzip him and ease down on that deliciously thick cock. She didn’t want to hear about some other woman. She wanted his mind on her, Molly Archer, and she wanted his thoughts to go no further than stretching her wide as he went balls deep.

  ‘The first time she contacted me was by email. She was very businesslike in the way she explained what she expected from me. It seemed so deranged that I almost turned her down, but I wanted the money so I upped my price. I was impressed by how thorough she was with her kink, and how in control of it she was.’

  ‘What did she do? Tie you up and peg you?’

  He gave his head a shake, then leaned back, hands flat on the bed behind him. ‘I met her at her condo. She was wearing something like what you’re wearing, all white frills and satin. She was nervous at first. Not afraid, but anxious that I might disappoint her. Finally, she talked herself into trusting me, and then she took me to the bedroom. Shall I go on?’

  Her impatience was bubbling over, but there was something hypnotic about his storyteller’s voice. She nodded and was met with a smile. He beckoned her again and, once she was before him, he gestured at the floor.

  ‘You want me on my knees?’

  ‘Don’t get too excited. I’ll tell you why once you’re down there.’

  Down she went and sat back on her calves, when what she really wanted was to pull out his cock and disturb his unflappability.

  He leaned forward and went on. ‘First, she wanted me to give her a stern talking-to. She wanted me to grill her about her business dealings, her personal life, how often she cancels her appointments with her personal trainer, how much of a credit-card balance she keeps, and so on. Once her failings were laid out before her, it was time to get physical.’ He leaned forward and cocked his head. ‘Have you ever had a good hard spanking, Molly Archer?’

  She shook her head. She would have answered, but her tongue had gone useless on her while her body was struck with a charge.

  A good hard spanking? Not only had she never had one, but she’d never really wanted one. She’d always found the fantasy off-putting, but as soon as the question had left Quinn’s mouth she ached to reach down and give herself a bit of a rub.

  He looked down at her pretty white stockings. ‘I think we’ll skip the boring parts. If you want to moan about your perceived faults, you can get yourself a therapist. Right now, I’m more interested in seeing how wet a few smacks will make your pussy. Up.’

  He held out his hand. It was such a gentlemanly gesture and she got to her feet as daintily as she could. He held on even after she draped herself over his lap, and something told her that he wouldn’t let go even while he was bringing a stinging palm down on her cheeks.

  ‘If we’re going to do this, then we’ll do it right,’ he said, and with his other hand he dragged her panties down just below her buttocks.

  ‘Did you use your hand with her?’ she asked, her voice shaking past her tonsils.

  ‘No, she had a leather paddle. Even if I had known this would be what we’d be getting up to tonight, I wouldn’t have brought anything with me. I like the idea of feeling the same sting in my hand that I’m giving to you on your arse.’

  ‘Hurts me more than it hurts you sort of thing?’

  ‘No, this won’t hurt me a bit.’

  He gave her three hard smacks and Molly thought she took them pretty well. Then again, it could have been the shock of being a thirty-year-old woman and getting her ass spanked for the first time since she was five. She gripped his hand and held her breath, and when the prickly heat began to spread she let the air out in a whistle, then snuffled a laugh as the absurdity of it returned to her.

  ‘Go on,’ he said. ‘Get out the giggles now. Once you really start to feel it, you won’t feel like laughing.’

  ‘Should I have a word?’ she asked quickly as she felt his movement, raising his hand over the other cheek.

  ‘What?’

  ‘A safe-word, isn’t it?’

  He laughed so heartily that she was jostled on his lap, and reached down to grab his leg to keep her balance.

  ‘Stop being such a drama queen. It’s not like I’m caning you. When I think you’ve had enough, I’ll stop.’ Molly started to protest, but Quinn gave her a bit of a shake. ‘For God’s sake, forget whatever garbage you’ve picked up online. Ready? No? Still talking? Too bad, then.’

  He brought his hand down on the other cheek, three times, and let his hand rest on the hot flesh. She was overcome with the need to move, but that hand seemed to demand stillness, and so she compensated by curling her toes until her shoes dropped off.

  ‘This is usually the part where she’d beg me to stop and tell me she won’t be a bad girl ever again, and I’d tell her I don’t believe her and keep going. I don’t think that would work with you, though. You came here dressed like that so you want to be the bad girl, and even if I did think I could get an apology out of you, I wouldn’t be able to acce
pt it without laughing myself sick.’

  ‘If you keep it up, I’m going to turn you over and give you a crack on the arse.’

  ‘That’s adorable,’ he said, and shoved her panties to her knees. ‘Go on, shake them off.’

  She discarded them, then squeaked as he grabbed her and dragged her with him while he scooted further back on the bed.

  Arms and legs now supported by the mattress, she pushed up onto her hands in a yoga-like pose and twisted her head around. ‘Are you done?’

  ‘Not even close, and stop trying to push my buttons. You can’t. I’m better at this than you are.’

  He added an exclamation point to his statement with his palm on the fleshiest part of her ass. This one packed a wallop that zinged in both directions, rattling her brains and giving her an itch on the bottom of her feet at the same time.

  She had to take a moment to catch her breath. Her heart beat so fast her head floated. She sank down, pressed her head against the mattress and sought his hand once more. She didn’t try to speak again until her palm was pressed against his.

  ‘You’ve got a big mouth.’

  ‘And you’ve got a red arse. Bend your knees and lift up a little.’

  She obliged with a happy little wiggle as he skimmed his other hand across the backs of her thighs.

  ‘Keep talking. I like your big mouth.’

  ‘Funny you should say that. I don’t talk half as much with anyone else as I do with you. I find silence is much more effective, save for the occasional dirty phrase thrown out here and there.’

  His touch became light and ticklish as he moved down between her thighs. She opened up for him, and the cool air let her know just how wet she had become. The plump insides of her thighs were slick.

  ‘It’s because I like you,’ he went on. ‘When I like someone, I talk them to death.’

  ‘So this isn’t just so I’ll let you slink around the hotel?’

  He said nothing. He simply drummed his fingers just above her pussy. Whether he was choosing his words or merely teasing her, she didn’t know. Either way, he answered her with a series of hard smacks.

  She clenched his hand and lifted her ass as each blow shook through her. The heat was glorious and she moaned, but the sting eventually became too much. She gave a kick and called out, and for a moment she worried he wasn’t going to stop. Three more measured smacks, though, and he relented.

  ‘The answer to your question is no, by the way,’ he said in a melodious tone. ‘This isn’t just because of our arrangement. I like you. How many times have I said it now? I’ve lost count. And you get me hard, so I want to fuck you while I’m talking to you. For a man who gets hard for a living, that’s a bit of a novelty.’

  His fingers returned between her thighs, but he didn’t tease this time. He spread her pussy lips, scissoring his fingers on both sides to give her clit a thorough rub. The instant pleasure moved everywhere, everywhere but the burning prickle on her arse. The contrast was beautiful, a flood surrounding a fire.

  ‘Have you – oh – have you never had anyone? Outside work, I mean.’

  ‘Every so often,’ he said, and then he said no more.

  Or maybe he did, and his fingers just tuned her to a different station. He wasn’t being gentle with her. He worked her clit with his whole hand and let her do the talking. Word after perverted word poured out of her. She demanded and begged, cursed and crooned, until it became harder to push her words or even a moan out.

  His squeeze on her hand anchored her as the intensity between her legs flared out and consumed her. She rocked on her knees in tune with the pulsations of her orgasm.

  When she couldn’t hold herself up any longer she sank down and quaked as he gave her clit one last pinch before sliding his fingers along her crack.

  ‘Not a bad start, if you ask me,’ he said softly, and twitched the tip of his finger into the throbbing mouth. ‘Did you pay for the night?’

  She made a garbled sound that he accurately took as a yes.

  ‘Good. I came prepared, but I get a new idea sparking in my head the longer I have you over my lap. This could take a while.’

  He jostled her, but retained his grip on her hand as she struggled to get up from his lap. He moved her between his legs, uttering, ‘Careful’ as she began to wobble. She still saw stars dancing in front of her eyes as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a phone.

  ‘Hey, that will cost you extra,’ she said as he turned it on.

  ‘Don’t worry. I’m not out to make you a porn star, even if I do think that would make a great second calling for you. I just want you to see.’ He awkwardly tapped the face with his thumb, then nudged her around. ‘Look.’

  She twisted her head and looked down. He had reversed the camera on the phone, so instead of seeing the blur of the carpet behind her, she found herself looking at the poppy-red spheres of her ass.

  Quinn tilted the camera up, and she quickly turned her head. ‘I don’t want to look at my face, for God’s sake.’

  ‘You should. Your other cheeks are just as red. You’re adorable.’

  She had to hide her smirk from him. It came from the compliment, and she didn’t quite know what to do with it. He caught it, though, and dropped his phone on the bed beside him. His fingers turned into little monsters, tickling her into submission until she was perched on his thighs, her sore ass blessedly clear of any pressure.

  ‘I don’t believe you’ve never done that before,’ he said. They were eye-to-eye, and there was no hiding that quirk of a smile now. ‘I did, until you started to giggle while I was really giving it to you. I don’t think I’ve ever heard such happy sounds before.’

  ‘I did not giggle,’ she said, but she couldn’t be too sure. When those hot smacks were splatting all over her cheeks, her head had been a big fizzy ball. He could have recited ‘The Cremation of Sam McGee’ the whole time and she wouldn’t have had a clue.

  ‘You are very giggly.’ He spoke softer now while he pushed his fingers into the swell of her hips. ‘I don’t hear laughter like that enough.’

  ‘I don’t laugh often,’ she whispered, running her hands up to his neck. Her cheeks continued to burn as she focused on unbuttoning him down to the naval. Once she revealed that chest speckled with ginger hairs, she mustered up her confidence to meet his gaze.

  She doubted he had looked away from her face the entire time she was undressing him. He seemed lost.

  In her? No, he was surely just reading her again.

  ‘Did you like it?’ she asked as she slipped her fingers beneath his collar. ‘Or did you do it because you knew I’d like it?’

  He pushed up enough for her to feel the hard bulge. ‘I liked it.’

  Still too sensitive, she rose up on her knees and found she enjoyed looking down on him. With his head tilted back and his neck exposed, he seemed vulnerable and younger than his years.

  ‘Though “liked” is the wrong word. It’s past tense, and I’m just getting started. I’m just giving you a bit of a breather.’

  With that, he gave her another smack. Molly yelped and pushed, and with a surprised oomph he went on his back.

  She didn’t try to hide her grin now. ‘Now who has the upper ha– Ouch!’

  This slap she returned with one of her own, a warning tap on his cheek. For a moment there was something animalistic in his expression. It touched her in some primal place so deep and dormant she hadn’t realised it was there. Suddenly ravenous, she leaned over him and pressed her forehead to his.

  ‘Kiss me,’ she whispered, and took his mouth before he could speak.

  Lips and tongues collided, chaotic at first, but once he had cupped her head firmly in his hands his silken tongue took possession. Then the firm hands stroked down, raising gooseflesh on her shoulders as he went for the thin straps.

  He fucked her mouth, twisting his head back and forth while his tongue bullied hers to remain compliant. Each time she tried to overtake him she failed, and she became more d
isoriented as he loosened the flimsy straps.

  Once he had succeeded in dragging the front of her bodice down, he released her and turned ferocious. Molly gasped as he grasped her arse in two handfuls, but the pain had dulled. He ordered her body up over his and closed his lips around her nipple.

  The tight pinch of his teeth offered only a brief release from the ache his suckling mouth invoked.

  ‘Again,’ she whimpered, driven to insanity by her need for some sort of gratification. ‘Spank me again.’

  Laughter sputtered wet on her breast and he dropped his head back for a moment. ‘If you want some of the rough stuff, I can give it to you. I know from experience how thick these walls are.’

  He ran his hand over her ass as he took her nipple into his mouth once more. Anticipation ran toxic in her veins. She lifted her ass, but only got the lightest of taps in return.

  ‘Do it,’ she urged in a hiss, and pushed up out of his mouth’s wet grasp. ‘Just three. Give me just three hard ones.’

  He raised his brows slightly, unaffected by the way she was turning into some starved feline thing on top of him. He gave not even a blink as she ground against his groin, no doubt leaving a stain on those expensive trousers.

  ‘Tell you what,’ he said slyly. ‘I’ll make a deal with you. I’ll give you one good crack on the ass if you let me do something really dirty to you.’

  ‘I want three,’ she demanded. ‘Just three and you can do whatever you want with me.’

  ‘Even …’

  He drummed his fingers down her ass, down between her pussy lips, then drew the moisture upward.

  ‘Yes?’ he asked as the tip of his finger met his mark. ‘No?’

  She let him find out for himself, arching in invitation he smeared her juices around the tight opening.

  ‘Yes,’ he whispered, and his hand fell away. ‘Get up. Get on your knees. Get your ass up again.’

  She dismounted and scuttled into position while he bounced on his behind to the edge of the bed.