The Mistletoe Pact: A totally perfect Christmas romantic comedy

by Lovett, Jo

  ‘Would you like to come back for a coffee?’ she asked.

  ‘I’d love to.’ He smiled at her and took her hand.

  When they rounded the bend in her road, Evie saw a man sitting on her doorstep. Maybe Josh was locked out again. It had happened once or twice before. Although wasn’t he out with Fergus this evening? God, she hoped they hadn’t split up.

  Goodness.

  Total stomach-lurching realisation.

  It wasn’t Josh. It was Dan.

  ‘Evie.’ He stood up. ‘And Matthew.’ His voice was remarkably cold. He looked pointedly at where they were holding hands. Matthew tried to let go of Evie’s hand and she clung onto his. ‘I thought we ought to talk. But apparently you’ve wasted no time.’

  ‘Apparently I’ve what?’

  ‘Wasted no time,’ Dan repeated, enunciating very clearly.

  ‘Are you joking?’

  ‘No.’

  Matthew pulled his hand a bit harder, and Evie clung on a bit harder. No way was Dan doing this.

  ‘Goodnight, Dan,’ she said.

  ‘I’d like to talk,’ he said.

  Matthew said, ‘If you’re alright, Evie, I think I should probably leave you to it.’

  ‘Okay,’ Evie said and reluctantly let go of his hand. ‘Thank you for a lovely evening, Matthew. I’m so sorry about this.’ She gestured at Dan.

  ‘Don’t worry.’ Matthew looked almost as miserable as she felt. ‘Goodnight.’

  Evie looked at Matthew’s disappearing back, and then back at Dan. His jaw was clenched and he actually looked like he wanted a fight. She looked down, and, yes, his fists were clenched too.

  ‘Excuse me,’ she said. ‘I’d like to go inside. I can’t open the door with you standing there.’ She wanted a fight too. How dare he say that she’d wasted no time. How dare he. But, also, had he, maybe, come to tell her that he loved her and he was ready for a relationship?

  ‘Could we talk?’ he said, not moving.

  ‘Do you mean so that you can apologise for being a hypocritical arse? I mean, “wasted no time”? Are you insane? Frankly, I could have slept with a hundred people in the past twelve days and that would be nothing to do with you, because, if you remember, you told me that you “couldn’t do this”. And it isn’t like you didn’t leap into bed with me in Vegas straight after getting Hannah pregnant, is it?’

  Dan stared at her for a really long time, his jaw still clenched, while Evie hoped desperately that he was going to tell her that he was sorry and he loved her and wanted to be together and that he’d manage to say it convincingly enough that she’d be able to believe him and forgive him for all his arsery.

  Eventually, he said, ‘I’m sorry. Really sorry. That was unforgivable. Yes, I was being a hypocritical arse. For the record, as I think I mentioned before, Hannah and I split up a good couple of weeks before Vegas. And for some reason that feels very different.’ Maybe because he and Evie loved each other and from the sounds of it he and Hannah hadn’t? ‘Yeah, I’m sorry.’ He looked at the key in her hand. ‘I’m sorry. I’m in your way. Goodnight.’

  He watched her open the door, and then, as she went inside, off he buggered. Off he bloody buggered. Arse. Arse.

  And Evie went upstairs and cried even more than she had before.

  Thirty-Eight

  Now – November 2022

  Dan

  He was so ashamed of himself. What was wrong with him? How could he have said that?

  Dan reached the end of Evie’s road and turned round. Maybe he should go back. Apologise properly. Explain that the reason he’d lost it was that he’d gone there to tell her he loved her, and then when it had become obvious that she was out for the evening he’d started torturing himself with the worry that she’d be out with someone else. And she had been. And he knew that Matthew was wrong for her.

  But she was right. It was none of his business what she did.

  Except he wanted it to be his business.

  He started walking back towards her house and then stopped.

  Better if he phoned her first maybe.

  She didn’t answer. He tried again. Still no answer.

  Maybe that was for the best. He was hurting so much right now it felt like proof that loving someone was, basically, horrible.

  He turned back round and started walking towards the station.

  * * *

  Saturday, a week later, Dan rolled his eyes at the ringing sound and didn’t budge from the sofa. That was the third time in about three minutes that his doorbell had gone. You’d think whoever it was would have realised by now that he wasn’t going to answer it. If it was a delivery they could leave it downstairs in the restaurant like they normally did and he could pick it up later. He lifted the TV remote and increased the volume.

  His phone pinged. It was Max. Apparently he was outside and he was coming in.

  ‘Afternoon,’ Max said about ten seconds later.

  ‘I should never have given you a key,’ Dan said.

  ‘How are you doing?’ Max asked, sitting down in Dan’s armchair.

  ‘I’m fine. Just having some downtime.’ Downtime thinking about how monumentally he’d cocked things up with Evie. He’d been trying very hard not to think about her and had slightly been succeeding until this morning when Sasha had mentioned Evie and Melting and Christmas in a text.

  ‘You don’t look fine.’

  ‘I’m completely fine.’

  ‘Bro. It’s three o’clock in the afternoon and you’re in your underpants watching The Simpsons.’

  ‘I like The Simpsons.’ In moderation. He’d definitely overdosed on them this afternoon.

  ‘How’s Evie?’

  ‘I don’t know.’

  ‘I think you need to speak to her.’

  Dan really shouldn’t have given Max a key. What was even the point when he lived on the other side of London?

  ‘I don’t need to speak to her.’ He increased the volume of The Simpsons even more. ‘Nothing else to say.’

  ‘Ever told her you love her?’

  Dan put his hands over his face and sighed loudly.

  ‘Remember when you didn’t want to talk to me?’ Max said. ‘Did it help to talk?’

  ‘Oh my God,’ Dan said. ‘So many questions. That was different.’

  ‘How was it different?’

  ‘Well, for a start, you didn’t hate me.’

  ‘She probably doesn’t hate you. Do you hate her?’

  ‘No.’ Dan suddenly really did want to talk. ‘Kind of still angry with her because she got back together with Matthew so soon after we split up. But, as she pointed out, that’s incredibly hypocritical and just wrong and it’s entirely up to her what she does because we aren’t together. Basically, I behaved really badly and I’m not sure she’d be interested in talking to me.’

  ‘I don’t think you have anything to lose if you tell her you love her. You have to be brave and fight for what you want sometimes.’

  ‘I don’t even know if I do want her,’ Dan said. Max stared at him. ‘I’m scared of getting hurt,’ he said.

  ‘What, because it would make you deeply miserable if you split up?’ Max was still staring at him, like he was stupid.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘And what are you now? Deeply happy? You idiot. Take happiness where you can find it.’ Max lunged for the remote and turned the TV off. ‘Come on. Get some trousers on. Let’s go out.’

  ‘Seriously,’ Dan grumbled. It would probably be nice to go for a walk or something, though. He hadn’t exactly been enjoying himself sitting here. It felt like there might be something in what Max had said. Maybe he’d think about that later. ‘I’m picking Katie up in an hour.’

  ‘I’ll come with you. If that’s alright?’

  * * *

  When Dan, Katie and Max got back to Dan’s flat, Max sang some nursery rhymes – painfully tunelessly, although Katie loved the singing – before standing up to leave.

  ‘Think about what I said,’
he told Dan before picking up a beaming Katie and plonking a big kiss on her cheek. ‘See you soon, Kitty-Kate. Tell your daddy to think about what I said.’

  It was starting to feel like Max was right and Dan should talk to Evie. When, though? And how? He could ask her if she wanted to meet up over Christmas. And she might not want to. Or he might mess up and not say things right. And, also, now he wanted to talk to her, he wanted to do it immediately.

  Maybe an old-fashioned letter would be the way to go. But, no, a letter would be too slow. He’d send her an email. This evening. Maybe both an email and a letter.

  Thirty-Nine

  Now – December 2022

  Evie

  Evie shivered, pulled her coat more tightly around her and dug her chin into her scarf. Bloody December. Bloody train station platforms with their wind tunnel effect. Bloody South Western Railway with their reduced timetable because there’d been a leaf or a snowflake on a train track in the past week. She was going to turn to ice while she waited for the train following the one that she’d hurried to catch but which had been cancelled, and then she was going to have to sprint at the other end to meet her friends at the cinema before the film actually started.

  Stupid idea to go touristy and go to a fancy cinema in Mayfair in the first place. Stupid idea to go out full stop.

  What she’d really like to do right now was go home and have a hot bath, get into her pyjamas and watch junk TV all evening. And wallow again a tiny bit, or maybe a lot, about Dan.

  Obviously, she shouldn’t wallow. She’d already spent far too much time being miserable. She should be grateful that she was living in an amazing city at the moment and that she’d met some great new friends at work, and enjoy a night out in the middle of London with people she liked. It would be nice to go home for Christmas, though, to her lovely, familiar village and her mum and Autumn and old friends. And maybe wallow a bit more.

  Her phone buzzed. She pulled it out. Checking her emails would be something to do while she waited. Although her hands were going to freeze now while she swiped. She should get some touch-screen gloves.

  She had an email from Dan. With the subject line I love you. Her heart lurched.

  She kind of wanted to open it immediately, but she also kind of didn’t. It felt… too much. Maybe he had something to say that would make everything feel better, but maybe she’d just feel even worse afterwards.

  She pulled her phone in against her chest and stared straight ahead.

  There was a lot of screeching of brakes and movement of people. Her train was coming. She’d better get on it.

  She stumbled into a seat near the door, still holding her phone against her, and then moved the phone out in front of her and looked again at the unopened email.

  It was like her whole body and brain were too stunned to open it. I love you was a strong phrase.

  She put her phone down on her lap, turned it over and looked out of the window at rail-side buildings illuminated by street lights. Not the most scenic view. Better than thinking about Dan, though.

  Oh, for God’s sake. She was being ridiculous. If she didn’t read it now, she’d think about it the whole time and wonder and wonder and ruin her evening. Better to know what he had to say.

  From: Dan Marshall

  To: Evie Green

  Subject: I love you

  Hi Evie,

  I never told you how much I love you. I’ve written a letter that I’m going to deliver to you tomorrow.

  I love you (and I miss you).

  Dan

  He loved her.

  Wow. She didn’t know what to think.

  What was his letter going to say? Another I love you? Or more?

  When would he deliver the letter? And did she want to read it?

  His life seemed so messy. Could she deal with that, if he wanted them to be together? She did love him. She really loved him, which she’d never told him. But was that enough?

  After that awful evening, when she’d effectively lost both Dan and Matthew for good, to her shame she’d thought very little about Matthew, because any feelings about him had been eclipsed by the utter devastation at the loss of her soul mate in Dan.

  ‘Arriving at Waterloo.’ Oh, shit. She’d missed her station. She should have got off at Vauxhall to switch to the Underground. Actually, she could just get on the Jubilee Line to go to Green Park. The station was heaving, though, and the Jubilee platform was a really long walk from here. Maybe she’d get a taxi. It felt like she deserved a little treat to cheer herself up after the shock of Dan’s email.

  In a far too expensive black cab – there was already eight quid on the clock and they’d barely moved; she’d just have got the Tube if she’d realised there’d be such a long queue at the taxi rank and it would cost this much – she texted her friends to let them know that she’d had a train issue but that she’d be there any minute. Bit of a fib if she was honest, because the traffic looked solid.

  ‘Who you meeting at the cinema?’ the taxi driver asked her.

  ‘Some girlfriends.’ Evie smiled at him in his rear-view mirror, feeling guilty about the fact that she really didn’t want to talk to him.

  ‘What film you going to watch then?’ Christ. Evie just wanted to think right now.

  Forty-five minutes later, she’d made it into her seat in the auditorium just as the ads finished and the trailers started. She hadn’t had any time to buy any chocolate or popcorn, which was obviously a good thing given that this was right in the middle of the Christmas over-eating season, but she did still feel cheated.

  She and Dan had chomped their way through a lot of sweets when they’d been to the cinema together.

  She looked at Priya, sitting to her right, as Dan had been when they went to the cinema.

  Priya was lovely.

  She wasn’t Dan, though.

  Evie reached down to her bag and sneaked her phone out and into her pocket. When everyone was really focused on the film, she could re-read his email without disturbing anyone. Maybe she could look at it now while people were watching the trailers.

  ‘Are you having a laugh?’ The man behind her, who’d been rustling his popcorn bag really annoyingly loudly for the past five minutes, poked her in the shoulder. ‘Put that away. I can’t watch a film with a phone light below me.’

  ‘Are you having a laugh?’ Priya had turned round and was glaring at him. ‘Looking at a phone’s a lot less disruptive than eating really loudly right behind people. And kicking the chairs in front.’

  ‘Sshhh,’ said about twenty people around them.

  Evie said, ‘Sorry, everyone,’ put her phone back in her bag and hunched down in her seat.

  ‘Waiting for you to apologise too,’ Priya told the man behind them.

  Evie screwed her face up and hunched further down. The man kicked both their chairs, hard, and crunched disgustingly loudly on some more popcorn.

  Priya got her phone out and turned the light on and waved it above her head.

  Evie put her hands over her face.

  An hour later, Evie sneaked a look at her watch during a very brightly lit scene. There was about an hour to go. The film wasn’t bad, actually. Except for the fact that it was a drama involving a sexy doctor and Dan was a sexy doctor – although red-headed and rugged as opposed to dark and suave – so it was very hard not to keep thinking about him.

  Snippets of different conversations with Dan were replaying in her head now.

  She really wanted to know what his letter said.

  She did not want to sit through the rest of this film.

  Maybe she could go out to the foyer and wait there.

  She whispered to Priya, ‘I’m going to pop outside for a few minutes,’ and half rose to go.

  ‘Sit down,’ growled the popcorn-and-kicking man from behind.

  ‘Stand up if you want to,’ hissed Priya.

  ‘I’m fine,’ whispered Evie, hunching in her seat again.

  ‘Sshhh,’ said several people.r />
  Honestly. What if she’d just wanted to go to the loo?

  Finally, the – to be fair, very good – film finished, and everyone watched and cheered the credits, for, honestly, ages, and then they made their way out to the foyer.

  ‘Such a shame that it’s too late for a drink,’ Claire, one of Evie’s friends, said.

  Evie nodded. ‘I know. Next time.’ It was actually such a good result. She really wanted to go home and get on with obsessing about Dan in peace.

  They all hugged goodbye and the others left Priya and Evie, who were going back to Vauxhall together.

  ‘This looks interesting.’ Priya stopped Evie in front of a large poster advertising the next Star Wars film and started reading out the names of the actors in it. Weird. Priya didn’t strike her as a Star Wars fan.

  ‘Haven’t heard of any of them,’ Evie said. ‘Do you like Star Wars?’

  ‘Kind of.’ Priya did the same in front of the next poster, which was advertising the new Disney film. That one did have a lot of famous actors in it.

  ‘This is going to be either a mega hit or a mega flop,’ said Evie, ‘with all these people in it.’

  Priya didn’t reply. Evie looked round to see why not. It turned out that she had her back to her and was talking to a man, who looked a lot like the popcorn-kicking man. She was gesticulating like mad. Evie really hoped she wasn’t going to start a fight or something.

  She was talking very animatedly.

  Evie started obsessing about Dan again. When would his letter arrive?

  She looked up. Priya was walking towards her brandishing her phone.

  ‘Got a date,’ Priya said.

  ‘What? Who with?’

  ‘The man who was sitting behind us.’

  ‘No way.’

  ‘You got to seize your opportunities when they present themselves. Life’s short and he’s hot. There’s a fine line between hate and love.’