“Yes,” Myles said. “He was owed so many favours from people that they didn’t mind doing one for his son. I thought that a military ship would be much more comfortable...”
“I’m sorry,” Lady Emily realized that he was still having a hard time talking about it. “We don’t have to talk to about it.”
“It’s all right,” Myles said. “I have been mentally preparing myself to talk about it as soon as I confirmed who Miss Kent was. I knew she would have questions, and I do not think that my pain is anything compared to hers.”
“That does not make your trauma less valid,” Lady Emily said.
“No,” Myles replied. “But it does mean that I will always know what happened, while she will only have nightmares about the worst possible thing. I hope to be able to ease her pain by at least telling her the truth and speaking calmly and easily about it.”
“That is kind,” Lady Emily replied. “And I am sure that you will find the strength to do so.”
“I will now that you are with me,” he said. Their hands shifted and almost touched. Lady Emily wanted to put one comforting hand on him, but she knew it was improper. It might even be improper to ride alone in this carriage with him; but she didn’t care. She was determined to go on this mission with him and was flattered that he had asked her.
The carriage started to roll through a part of town that neither of them had ever been in. It was the poorer side of town, and Lady Emily looked in shock at the decay of the houses.
“Are you sure this is the right place?” she asked him. “Are you sure this is where she lives?”
“This is the address that I got,” he said, although he looked unsure. When the carriage finally rolled to a stop, Myles peeked out the window and then turned to Lady Emily.
“I think perhaps you should stay in here,” he said. “Where it is safe.”
Normally, she would disobey him, or anyone who prevented her from doing something. However, it seemed that Myles did have her best interests at heart, and she did not want to appear ungrateful. She simply nodded and leaned back. She did intend to watch him the whole time, of course, but she would be safe inside.
Myles stepped out of the carriage and went to the house that the driver pointed out. He rapped twice on the door and then waited. The house was a little nicer than those in the neighbourhood, and Lady Emily wondered if it was because the lieutenant's money had funded it.
She was starting to think that no one was home, when a pretty young woman came to the door. She was blonde, with large blue eyes, and although quite thin, she was quite pleasant to look at. She seemed surprised that Myles was there and even more surprised when he handed over the letter he had carried all this way.
Myles spoke a few words to her, and the woman nodded. Her hands were shaking but Lady Emily saw her lips move in a thank you to Myles. From behind her, Lady Emily saw a small child peek out, and her heart sank.
The poor family. The poor woman. The poor little girl.
Normally, she never would have thought such things. If she was waiting in a carriage for someone, she would have been absorbed in her own thoughts, rather than watching and feeling such strong pity.
When Myles finally got back into the carriage, she turned to him with shock.
“She didn’t know?” she asked.
“She did know,” he replied. “And she knew that there was no way he could have survived. She just didn’t think that she would ever hear from him again. She didn’t think that anyone even know they existed.”
“Well, then. That was a good and kind thing you did,” Lady Emily said. “How will they survive?”
“I don’t know,” Myles said. “Because she doesn’t have any income. He fully supported her, after she lost her job as a teacher, due to the child. I offered her some assistance, but she seemed too much in shock to fully understand why I was there.”
“Maybe I can help,” Lady Emily said. “We did talk about getting involved in more causes, right?”
“We did,” he replied.
“Perhaps I could get one of the organizations I’m thinking of to assist her,” she said. “After all, she would surely be qualified to receive such assistance.”
“I agree,” Myles replied. “That is very kind of you.”
“I’m only following what we set out to do,” Lady Emily said. “You’re the one who carried the letter all that way.”
“Oh, it was nothing,” Myles said. “I’ve just kept it in my pocket.”
“He must have been a good friend,” Lady Emily said, as the carriage hit a bump. She was almost thrown into his lap, and for a brief moment, she thought about exaggerating the motion so that she was.
She stopped herself before she did something that obvious, but she did think about it.
“He was,” Myles replied. “There was something about him. He was the type of person who would befriend everyone, despite their circumstances. And despite his own circumstances, he was always happy and ready to have a conversation. I wish I could be more like that.”
“I like you just the way you are,” Lady Emily said, with a smile. Myles smiled back at her and the two of them fell into silence. Lady Emily had no idea what Myles was thinking, but she was thinking about how she would be able to spend more time with him once Catherine came into town.
She supposed Catherine could entertain herself for a few hours at a time, and Lady Emily could walk with Myles in the garden and steal a few stolen moments to speak to him whenever they were alone.
“Thank you again for coming with me,” Myles said, when they finally reached her house again. He helped her down from the carriage and their eyes met as he did. She could stay there forever, lost in his gaze, but she knew everyone inside the house would be watching, and she didn’t want rumours to fly.
“Thank you inviting me,” she said. “I hope we have another adventure soon.”
“I’m sure we will,” Myles said, with a sparkle in his eyes.
When Catherine arrived a few days later, Lady Emily was happy to see her. After all, they were the closest of friends, and she had so many thoughts she wanted to share with her. The two women embraced, and then Lady Emily led Catherine up to her room, so they could talk in private.
“I missed you so much,” she said to her. “There has been no one to confide in.”
“I missed you as well,” Catherine said. “It seemed as if every time I thought of something wonderful to tell you, I never found the time to write it down. So please tell me, how have you been? What has been happening since I’ve been away?”
Lady Emily told her of her adventures with Myles, and Catherine gasped at the story of Miss Kent.
“I can’t believe that the two of you visited a disgraced woman together,” Catherine said. “Did anyone see you?”
“No,” she said. “At least, I don’t think anyone saw us. But I don’t mind if they did, because we are going to help her.”
“Oh?” she asked. “How?”
“Myles and I decided that we are going to talk to some of the organizations we are surrounded by,” she said. “And see if there are any causes that can help her.”
“Lady Emily,” Catherine said. “I thought you weren’t interested in this man beyond the fact that he is an exotic American?”
“I didn’t say that,” Lady Emily said, with a smile. “But I would be very sad if he went home.”
“Well,” Catherine said. “Could you marry him?”
“No,” Lady Emily said. “I couldn’t, even if I wanted to. He is of a different class.”
Catherine paused.
“Are you sure?” she asked.
“Yes,” she said. “I am certain he is not a gentleman. I don’t mind, but at the moment...It would be very difficult to make such a match work.”
“Yes,” Catherine said. “He would need to marry someone who wasn’t a titled lady.”
“Perhaps,” Lady Emily said. “But he doesn’t even plan to stay in England, so I suppose such talk doesn't matt
er.”
“Mm,” Catherine said, although it seemed she wasn’t listening.
Lady Emily didn’t think anything of the comment until Catherine was at dinner with them. Then, she noticed her friend lean over and talk to Myles in a smooth voice. Myles laughed, and Lady Emily raised an eyebrow. She wasn’t sure who this person was, but it seemed the shy timid Catherine who had last visited was gone.
It happened again, and then again, and again. Catherine would find an excuse to stand close to Myles, and then she would say something so softly that only the two of them could hear it. Myles would laugh, and gaze adoringly at her, and everyone would pretend they didn’t notice.
Lady Emily sat through these social engagements with a smile on her face, so that no one would know her true thoughts. She couldn’t believe that Catherine was acting like this. She couldn’t believe her shy, timid friend had come back only to be a flirt. And worse than that, she was flirting with the man that Lady Emily was starting to fall in love with.
Lady Emily wouldn’t have minded if Myles wasn’t flirting back with her. But it seemed he was starting to give Catherine the same look that he used to give to her.
Lady Emily decided to talk to Catherine. She didn't like the wording that she had to use, but the fact that it seemed Myles was starting to forget her made her panic. She couldn’t believe that Myles wasn’t looking her way as much. As soon as she got Catherine alone, she gave her the speech she had prepared.
“Catherine,” she said, one morning. “I wanted to speak to you. I’m concerned.”
“You’re concerned about what?” Catherine asked. “Have I done something wrong? Have I offended you or your family?”
Catherine looked so panicked that Lady Emily brought her emotions back a little bit.
“No, no,” she said. “It is nothing like that. It’s just...I heard that you and Myles were having a wonderful time at the ball.”
“Well, yes of course,” Catherine said. “What a nice ball it was, the other night, and how kind you were to throw it in my honour. Myles does need a bit more practise at balls though.”
“That’s strange,” Lady Emily said. “For he was perfect at the last ball.”
“Perhaps it is because we have not taught him since,” Catherine said, and Lady Emily raised an eyebrow.
“Because we had not taught him?” she asked her.
“Yes,” Catherine said. “I mean, I know you are very busy, so perhaps it’s because I had not practised dancing with him lately. Perhaps I should have.”
“Catherine,” Lady Emily said, and lay her hand on her friend’s arm. “You know that I am only telling you this because you are my friend, and I love you like a sister.”
Catherine paused.
“Telling me what?” she asked, concerned.
“It’s that you...and Myles...well, you are acting like a bit of a flirt. And I know you would never intend to do such a thing.”
Catherine looked absolutely shocked at the accusation.
“A flirt?” she cried. “Oh, no, I would never do that. It’s just…”
The fact that she didn’t complete her sentence at all made Lady Emily raise one eyebrow.
“It’s just?” she asked.
“It’s just…” Catherine paused. “I think Myles might be an interesting man to...pursue. And if you are not doing so, because he is not a titled noble...I thought, maybe he would be interested in me.”
“Oh?” Lady Emily said. “Why would you think that?”
“Well, it seems like he would be interested in me, based on the conversation that we were having,” she said. “And I thought...if there was a man, right here, under my nose, who was interested in marrying me...perhaps I should try?”
Lady Emily paused.
“But Catherine,” she said. “He’s an American. And he is below you.”
“You think so?” she asked. “I thought that…”
“No,” Lady Emily sat beside her. “You can’t think about even being interested in him. What would people think, if you married an American? And a lower class one at that?”
“I don’t think they’d think anything,” Catherine said. “For I am not a titled noble like you. I would not…”
“No,” Lady Emily said. “Myles is interesting to talk to, but you cannot continue this. I am simply saying this out of the goodness of my heart, and out of the fact that I want to make sure you are safe. What if you got alone with him and something terrible happened?”
“Why would something terrible happen?” Catherine asked. “I thought you knew him quite well. I thought that…”
“No,” Lady Emily said. “I don’t. And whenever I have talked to him, I thought there was something about him that made me feel...a bit...I don’t know... Unsettled.”
“Unsettled?" Catherine asked. “Why didn’t you tell me that before?”
“I was just trying to be polite,” she replied. “So that he didn’t feel offended.”
“But…” Catherine said. “But he…”
“Please don’t question me,” Lady Emily said, in her best regal voice. “You know I am only looking out for you.”
“I know,” Catherine said, in confusion. “I just...why is this happening? Emmie, you don’t understand. I thought I found the perfect man. I thought everything was going to be all right, and now you are telling me that he isn’t perfect?”
“Why are you suddenly saying he is perfect?” Lady Emily asked. “Before you went home, you never thought he was interesting?”
“Well, I think he is perfect because…” Catherine struggled to find the right words. “Because he is right in front of me, and he seems interested. And you know how much I fear being a spinster?"
“Aside from those reasons, do you have any others?” Lady Emily asked and Catherine shook her head. “Exactly,” Lady Emily responded. “And you know, Catherine, that I do not want you to settle.”
“I’m not settling!” Catherine swore, although she didn’t sound sure all of a sudden. “I’m not. I just…”
“Catherine,” Lady Emily said, patiently and kindly. “There will be someone out there for you. And he will be lovely, and kind and you will fall in love with him and he will sweep you off his feet. But Myles, the American, who comes from a lower class of people, is not for you. You deserve better.”
“Oh Emmie,” Catherine said, as tears formed in her eyes. “You are such a good friend.”
“Of course,” Lady Emily said, and reached out to hug her. She felt bad that Catherine was crying, but she did not feel bad about dissuading her friend from being interested in Myles. She could not have Catherine paying attention to Myles, when in fact, she wanted Myles all to herself.
She hadn’t realized that until that very moment. She was in love with Myles Whitehall, and she wanted to have him as her own. She knew it would be hard, if not impossible. She also knew she could never stand to be in the same room as him, if he was attached to someone else.
The best-case scenario would be that she found a way to have him. The second-best case scenario would be that he went back to America, and no one could have him. The worst case in the world was that he would stay in her life but fall in love with Catherine.
A Lady's Taste For Temptation (Historical Regency Romance) Page 20
