What Remains

by Sandra Miller

  It was with trembling hands that he finally dialed the number to his house. It was now five: thirty. Silently, he pleaded for Tessa to answer; to fill his ear with her sweet laughter.

  “Hello,” she greeted almost immediately, as if she had been sitting by the phone waiting, which he knew was not the case, not at this hour. But it didn’t matter. What was important was that she answered, which meant she was safe and sound at home.

  “I apologize for calling so late—well, early now I guess,” he mumbled, overwhelmed with the need to see her.

  “You can call whenever you want, silly,” she giggled, offering Seth a slight reprieve from his melancholy. “Besides, I’m glad you called. I’ve been worried. It’s not like you to neglect you duties as a tyrant.”

  The grin that spread across his face felt nice. There hadn’t been a reason to smile for days.

  “You should consider my remiss as a compliment. It must mean that I have complete faith in you.”

  “Hmmm…that would be a first. Have you been drinking by any chance?”

  Chuckling, Seth stretched out on the bed, fluffed the pillows and made himself comfortable. Suddenly, he felt the first hint of sleepiness.

  “Are you still there?” she teased.

  “Yeah, sorry. And yes I have been.”

  “Oh, I see. Rough week, huh?”

  “Nothing I can’t handle.”

  “Spoken like a man with one foot over the ledge. Is there anything I can do to help?”

  “Just be home when I get there. I’ve missed you.”

  Tessa’s laughter sounded like a lullaby. “Yeah, I could tell by the way the phone has been ringing off the hook.”

  “Just because I haven’t called much doesn’t mean you haven’t been on my mind,” he grinned, even though he had no right to admit it. “Tessa…”

  “Yes?” The shy tone of her voice told him she knew that the direction their conversation was about to take was a more serious, a personal one.

  “If I’ve ever made you feel uncomfortable, or said anything to hurt you in anyway, I’m sorry.”

  “Seth, you’re scaring me.”

  It was not his way to talk about deeply private matters or personal family issues. The idea of complaining about being the reluctant, misunderstood, multi-millionaire seemed pathetic. But how he needed someone to talk to who wouldn’t judge him, or take sides to protect their own interests.

  “Tess, I’m being forced to make some tough decisions that will ultimately affect everyone in my life, including you.”

  “Don’t worry about everyone else; do what you think is right.”

  “That’s what I’m trying to do, but it’s difficult. So many people are depending on me, Tess.”

  “Are they all over the age of eighteen?”

  Seth chuckled, “Yes, they are.”

  “Then I don’t see why you should feel responsible for anyone but yourself, unless of course you planning on going postal or something.”

  “No, nothing like that.”

  “Well, then you’re golden, Pony Boy.”

  Tessa Maguire’s capacity to cut through the bullshit and see things for what they were was exactly why he loved her.

  Seth opened his eyes and blinked several times.

  Where did that from?

  The bottom of his glass of bourbon, most likely.

  “Well, I guess with that problem solved then, we can focus on more important things, like what are we having for dinner tomorrow night? Having to eat out for every meal is killing me now that you’ve got me addicted to down home cooking.”

  “Oh, you haven’t tasted real home cooking yet,” she laughed.

  “What have I been eating then?”

  “I’ve sort of been easing you into it.”

  “Well, I think I’m ready for the real thing.”

  “Are you sure?” she asked, her southern accent growing more pronounced, as it always did when she was relaxed. “Because once I break out the beans with fat back, and cornbread it’s over. There’s no coming back from that.”

  Seth laughed openly, finally dispelling the sullen mood his mother’s phone call had put him in. This was exactly why he would move heaven and earth to keep Tessa in his life, no matter in what capacity.”

  “Bring it on,” he finally managed to say, still smiling from ear to ear.

  “Dang, then I’ve got work to do. They need to soak for hours.”

  “Don’t worry about it. Anything you want to cook is fine. I think it’s just your company I miss, anyway.” Seth knew he was fishing for a sign, any hint that she might be feeling the same way, even though he knew it was doubtful considering how crazy she was about her young college professor.

  The shy giggle he heard told him the comment had made her uneasy, which could be taken either way, so it was of no help what-so-ever.

  “I’ve got a surprise for you when you get home. Just so you know,” she dodged artfully, which caused his heart to drop a little.

  “And what is that?”

  “I can’t tell you, that is why it’s called a surprise, silly man.”

  “I’m not big on surprises…just so you know.”

  “Alright, I’ll tell you then, if you really want me to?”

  “Please do.”

  “Netflix has every episode of Hee Haw. So the party starts at eight o’clock tomorrow night.”

  Seth laughed, and continued to smile, even after they said goodnight.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Christmas Eve arrived along with the season’s first snowfall; Seth could see the massive flakes floating down past his bedroom windows. Somewhere downstairs he could hear the dogs barking, no doubt trying to vie for Tessa’s attention. A quick glance at the clock told him it was only seven: thirty. Why was she up so early? She probably had trouble sleeping again, which worried him, the lack of it was making her moody, and dark circles were beginning to form under her eyes, always causing her to appear exhausted.

  Even though he had asked several times if everything was okay with her family and at school, she always smiled and accused him of worrying too much, which offered him little comfort. Something was going on that she was refusing to tell him. If it had anything to do with her relationship with Gregory Hayes, Seth knew she would never disclose it. Like himself, Tessa kept her personal life private.

  Maybe it was a simple case of her missing her children? He had offered to give her the entire Thanksgiving week off so that she could go visit them, but she refused on the grounds that she wouldn’t be able to choose which one of the four to go see, since none of them had the means or the time off from work to travel to a destination where they could all be together.

  This holiday season would not be the same, even though she thought differently. Seth had made arrangements far enough in advance to ensure that the family would be able to spend Christmas under one roof. In order to keep their secret, they had all had to let her go through the trouble of wrapping their presents and mailing them early enough to arrive in time. Even though he felt guilty, the expression on her face when they arrived would be worth it.

  To make matters worse, Tessa had been forced to endure the joy of the holiday season by supervising the decorating of the estate. Normally, it was done for the community, just as it had always been for fifty years since his grandparents’ owned the property, and he hated every minute of it. But this year was different; Seth found that he wanted to actually take an active part in it, so that everything would be perfect for Tessa and her children, right down to actually picking out the twenty foot tree that now resided in the library.

  Even though she had put on a happy face throughout the week long decorating ordeal, he could see the sadness lurking behind her smile. The four of them would only be able to stay for the three day weekend, but it would all be worth it if Tessa returned to her joyful, energetic self.

  Slipping his robe on over his pajama bottoms, Seth headed down stairs to see what the commotion was all about, for the retriev
ers had yet to stop barking. What in the world could Tessa possibly be up to that had them in such a state excitement.

  Once inside the kitchen, Seth understood why they were so vocal. One of Tessa’s very shapely legs were extended beyond the opening of the pantry door, four feet in the air as she plundered through the top shops of the pantry on a wobbly step stool. Sure that she was going to end up breaking her neck, Seth rushed forward to offer assistance.

  “Tessa, what in the hell are you doing?” he griped.

  The sound of his voice must have startled her, because she lost her balance and tumbled downward, lucky that Seth made it in time to catch her before she hit the floor. The scare caused him to look down at her sternly as he cradled her small body in his arms.

  “I wanted to make real hot chocolate, like my momma use to,” she tried to explain before her enthusiasm got the better of her and she gushed. “It’s snowing outside.”

  Seth’s irritation softened, and he smiled at her reluctantly, before setting her down on her bare feet. “I know.”

  “Why haven’t you left already? You said you would be gone before I woke up.”

  Tugging gently at the single braid that fell over one shoulder, he offered her an excuse that was lighthearted, though not in the least truthful. “Aside from the fact that it’s not even eight o’clock yet, I figured I’d stick around a little while this morning to keep my clumsy housekeeper from breaking her neck.”

  Tessa smacked him in the arm, though the impact was buffered the sleeve of her corded sweater that hung several inches past her fingertips. It was only then that he noticed it was the only thing she had on, which caused him to groan inwardly.

  “I’m not clumsy—you scared me! You shouldn’t go around yelling at people like that.”

  “Whatever,” he teased, trying to hide the fact that seeing her like that drove him insane. “Why aren’t you dressed? It’s too chilly in this old barn to run around naked.”

  “I’m hardly naked. Besides, I didn’t think you were here.”

  “Well, it doesn’t matter. Get dressed. You’re coming with me today.”

  “Oh no, no way,” she giggled. “It’s your family; you’re going to have to deal with them on your own this time.”

  “There’s no getting out of it, sorry. I’m not letting you spend Christmas by yourself.”

  “Seth, I’m not going and that’s final. I refuse to spend my Christmas Eve with your crazy relatives—no hard feelings.”

  “I decided I’m not going to my parents. I have plans for just the two of us.”

  Brushing past him, Tessa abandoned her plans for hot chocolate and made her way through the mansion to her bedroom. Apparently, she refused to hear anything else about it, which was going to ruin his surprise.

  When she reached her room, she pulled a pair of tattered jeans out of her chest of drawers and slipped them on; giving Seth a nice view of the sexy round bottom exposed beneath the boy cut white undies she wore. As much as he enjoyed the fact that she felt comfortable enough around him to not think twice about what she wore, or didn’t wear as the case may be, it also created a lot of awkward moments that only he was privy to.

  “It will be just the two of us this time, I swear,” he managed to choke out with some semblance of disinterest as she slipped the sweater off over her head and stood in front of the bed with only a chemise and a pair of unfastened jeans on. The thinness of her satin chemise did little to hide the fact that she was indeed cold, or the fact that she had a very nice rack, which he was made all too aware of at his grandmother’s birthday bash. It took him days to get that image out of his mind.

  “I don’t believe you,” Tessa responded tersely, turning her back to him as she slipped off the chemise as well, to put on bra.

  When he seen her struggle with the hooks in the back, Seth stepped forward and helped her. It took every ounce of restraint he could muster not to run his hands across her bare shoulders. Reaching across the bed to grab the shirt she planned to wear for the day, Tessa left him with no other option but to step away. The temptation was simply becoming overwhelming.

  After she was finally dressed, she turned around to confront him.

  “Now, go spend Christmas with your family, Seth Richards. I’m staying here.”

  “I can’t let you do that. So slip your gorgeous ass out of those thread-bare jeans and put on something warm.”

  “FYI, it’s my day off,” she continued to protest with no sign of wavering or with no sign that she had heard the remark he’d let slip about her bottom. “Which means you can’t order me to do anything.”

  “I’m not ordering you. I’m asking as a friend. Please.”

  Tessa stopped short in the middle of making up her bed. Of everything he said so far that morning, the simple word please was the only thing that seemed to make her reconsider.

  “Oh, don’t do that…” she caved ever-so-slightly.

  “What?”

  “You know, make me feel sorry for you.”

  Arching a brow in askance, he resorted to making a silent plea if it was going to make her change her mind.

  “OMG, you’re such a bastard,” she laughed. “No! I’m not going with you, and that’s final. I don’t need you to babysit me.”

  Seth gave up. There was nothing he could say to change her mind. He would have to move on to plan B.

  Rubbing his hand across his bare abdomen, he watched briefly as she finished putting the pillows back on the freshly made bed before he realized what he was doing. It was becoming increasingly difficult to stay focused around her, and keep his imagination from getting the better of him.

  “Are you hungry?” she asked, drawing his attention back to the conversation.

  “Huh?”

  “You’re rubbing your stomach like you’re hungry.”

  “Oh, yeah, I am. Maybe we can at least have breakfast together before I leave.”

  “I’ll make us some hot chocolate, too,” she remembered before approaching the spot where he stood by the door with a cheerful smile across her face. Standing on her tip toes, she reached up and placed an innocent kiss against his chin. “Even though I’m not going with you, the offer was very sweet, and I thank you for it.”

  “No problem, baby girl.”

  Careful not to touch his bare chest, Tessa pulled the front of his robe together and tied it closed. “I’ll make it quick, I promise. You need to get to Boston before the roads get bad.”

  “You’re too good to me, you know that, right?”

  “Oh, it’s the story of my life, Boss Man…” she giggled as she swept past him. “Give, give, give…”

  Seth waited inside the terminal at Logan Airport for his corporate jet to arrive that carried Tessa’s four children. For weeks, he had wracked his brain about what to get her for Christmas; she wasn’t an easy woman to buy for. He knew any gift she received would have to come from the heart or it would be a disappointment. Then one evening when the phone rang and it was Rene, it hit him. The only thing Tessa truly cared about was her family, and when her oldest daughter eagerly agreed to help make it happen, Seth knew he had found the perfect gift.

  In all honesty, it had been a blast planning the surprise; the clandestine phone calls to and from her children, setting up all the arrangements, going out and shopping for gifts for everyone and hiding them. It was the first Christmas he could remember being excited about. It had become more than just a dreaded occasion to exchange elaborate gifts to a family who had everything. This year he finally was able to experience the joy of giving to someone who didn’t expect it, but who deserved it. It was also the first time his wealth felt more like a blessing than a means of manipulation.

  A sudden case of nervousness came over him as he spotted the plane with his corporate logo on the side of it, pulling into the tarmac. They were the only ones on board, so it wouldn’t take long for them to disembark. After only about twenty minutes, an easy smile crossed his lips when he watched their hurried approach,
laughing amongst themselves.

  Being that he was the only other person at the gate who wasn’t standing behind a counter or pushing a broom, they spotted him immediately. Each and every one of them had their mother’s charismatic smile, which alleviated much of the apprehension of meeting them for the first time, as did the warm greeting they gave him, wrapping their arms around his neck and thanking him for the all the trouble he went through to help them spend Christmas with their mother.

  The three girls looked so much like Tessa that it was easy to for him to feel comfortable with the affection they offered. Her son, who must have taken after their father, stood back with a proud grin on his face as he watched his sisters weave their magic. When they had finally settled down enough for Seth to hear him over their excited chatter, Shane extended his hand and greeted him with the quiet stoicism of an only son. Seth recognized the mature manner in which he conducted himself, because he had grown up with the same sense of responsibility as an only son in a family of women.

  “It’s nice to finally meet, sir,” he stated, in a no-nonsense tone of voice.

  “Please, it’s Seth. And I’m glad you could make it.”

  After a few stops to pick up food supplies that the girls needed to put the finalizing touch to their plans to make it like Christmas’ past, they headed home to Amherst, with the girls constantly giggling over stories from their childhood. Their voices added to Seth’s already festive spirit, and filled him with a sense of deep contentment. The four of them were so animated and full of life and laughter. Seth now understood why Tessa always seemed so happy. She was wealthy beyond belief with the intangibles that made life worth living.

  The sun was already beginning set by the time they arrived at the estate, even though it was only six o’clock. The precipitation had stopped hours earlier, so the sky was now clear and full of stars. The Christmas lights from within the house cast a welcoming glow on the new fallen snow.