Grace, slim, pale, and red-haired, was even taller than Alex. She had played basketball and volleyball in college, but had given up sports after marrying Alex’s father, who had also played basketball for the same university.
“Al!” the deep, booming voice of Alexander Foamer immediately turned Alex’s mouth up at the corners.
“Hi, Dad,” she said, turning to hug him.
“It’s great to have you home, kiddo,” he said, setting her back on her feet. “This is the last time we allow you to take a two-year break from family holiday gatherings.”
“Duly noted,” Alex said, smiling up at him. She turned quickly to face her mother, knowing that the more time she spent talking to her dad, the more likely it would be that he would ask how Sealey was doing. And she really didn’t want to talk about Sealey right now.
“You got here just in time,” Grace said, sliding her hand up Alex’s arm. “I just pulled the lasagna out of the oven. Let’s eat, and then I’ll let you help me get some things ready for Thanksgiving tomorrow.”
“Sounds perfect,” Alex replied, her smile feeling like a saving grace on her face.
Thanksgiving with her family was exactly what Alex needed. The warm familiarity seemed to have the combined effect of a painkiller and elective amnesia. But this only worked as long as she wasn’t alone for too long. As soon as she had enough time to sit quietly and think, everything began pressing in on her again. It was during one such moment that Grace finally caught her.
A single tear was sliding down Alex’s face as she sat on the couch, her knees tucked under her chin. She stared silently out the front window, thinking of her life in Logan, sans Lucas and Sealey. It kept haunting her. And she was completely out of her depth on how to make things right.
“Alex?” Grace asked, coming to sit next to her on the couch. She slid her thumb gently under Alex’s eye, wiping the tear away. “Wanna tell me about it?”
Alex bit her lip, wanting more than anything to partake of her mother’s wisdom, but knowing that if she did, she would have to admit all the stupid, thoughtless things she’d done over the past few months.
“Oh, Mom,” she sniffed. “I’ve made such an idiot of myself lately.”
“Well, the beauty of such situations, is that they’re almost always temporary,” Grace answered, waving a hand carelessly through the air. “And at least you know about it. That means there’s hope of improvement.”
“I’m not so sure about that,” Alex said quietly. “I’ve burned the bridge big time on this one.”
“Oh, really?” Grace said, raising an eyebrow. “The person on the other side of that bridge doesn’t believe in forgiveness?”
“I doubt it. He’s pretty hard core. And I don’t think I’ve earned it.”
“Ah,” Grace said, as though she suddenly understood. “It’s a boy. Then it’s even easier than I thought.”
“What?” Alex said in confusion, looking at her mother. “What difference does that make?”
“One of the truly blessed gifts given to the male gender is the ability to easily and quickly forgive,” Grace explained. “Sure, there are exceptions, but the chance that you’ve encountered one is pretty remote.”
“You think he’ll forgive me, just because he’s a guy?” Alex asked skeptically.
“I’d say it’s highly likely,” Grace responded, rubbing Alex’s shoulder. “While women are apt to hold grudges, men tend to be the opposite. They take offense quickly and somewhat violently, but given some time, they let it go and move on. It’s forgotten.” She waved her fingers haphazardly back over her shoulder as though she were flicking away a fly.
“Seems like a pretty dangerous generalization to make,” Alex commented. “What if he’s not like that?”
“If I might pry a little bit,” Grace began hesitantly, scooting a little closer to Alex. “Would the boy on the other side of this burned bridge be named Sealey, by chance?”
“Oh, Dad mentioned him to you, did he?” Alex said tonelessly.
“Yes, he mentioned that he met a lovely young friend of yours when he stopped by to visit you.”
“I’m not sure lovely is the word I would use to describe him,” Alex muttered, thinking of all the sarcastic remarks and looks she’d received from Sealey over the past few months. “But he is my friend. A good friend. And I definitely caused some trouble for him. Which brings me back to my conundrum. What if he’s not the ‘forgive and forget’ type?”
Grace smiled kindly at her but didn’t answer her question. “Sealey is quite an unusual name,” she mentioned instead. “What does it mean?”
“I dunno,” Alex shrugged, sighing. “Judging from his nature, probably something like ‘overly blunt, bossy, and sarcastic; likely to hold grudges.’ ”
Grace chuckled. “It sounds like you have an interesting history with this one.”
“You have no idea,” Alex muttered.
“Well, when you see him again, my advice would be to just be kind,” Grace advised. “So many problems in this world would be solved with a little kindness. It’s a universal healer.”
Alex wasn’t sure if something as simple as kindness would be enough to solve her problem, but she was willing to give it a shot.
“Thanks, Mom.”
Alex returned to Logan the following Sunday, feeling refreshed and ready to face a new phase of life. Although she was still nervous to encounter Sealey and officially ask him to forgive her, she knew that’s what she needed to do.
But she couldn’t find him. She’d tried to call him several times since her conversation with her mother, but he’d never picked up. She’d been tempted to show up at his apartment when she returned to Logan, but she was too afraid of encountering Lucas. It was true that as she more fully accepted the idea that Lucas and Olivia belonged together, the aching around the edges of her heart became easier and easier to bear.
In fact, the time spent in Malibu, away from the situation, had allowed her to have an epiphany of sorts. She had spent a lot of time thinking through the last few months, focusing specifically on all the key moments spent with Lucas. In those ponderings, Alex detected a red flag that should have alerted her to the likely doom of their relationship, even if Olivia had not been in the picture. That red flag had been a bit of a saving grace in her attempt to forgive herself for the part she’d played in destroying Sealey’s hopes.
Her realization was that Lucas’s hesitancy, from the beginning, to support her in her career goals and dreams was a definite indication that eventually, their relationship would have fizzled. She knew herself. She knew that eventually she would have learned to resent him for holding her back. The thought that she didn’t owe her and Sealey’s current states of relative misery to her choice alone made her feel much better. But that didn’t necessarily mean she wanted to willfully encounter Lucas just yet. Therefore, she would avoid his apartment in her attempt to get in touch with Sealey.
She hadn’t seen or heard from Sealey now for over a week, and she was becoming seriously concerned. While she had called him numerous times, she’d only left one message, and it had been pretty pathetic. She told him again that she was sorry for ruining everything and that she hoped he was okay. She then asked him to call her. He had obviously ignored it.
Now, sitting on a freezing park bench in complete dejection, wanting to get somewhere warm, but dreading the pitying looks she was still receiving from her roommates, she wondered if maybe the time had come to move on. She had thoroughly messed up in Logan, Utah, but maybe that mess was exactly the motivation she needed to do something with her life. To start working toward that dream she’d told Sealey about all those months ago.
The speaking series was the perfect answer to her conundrum. She had almost reached her deadline for getting back to Dr. Welch—she’d actually almost forgotten all about it in the wake of losing Lucas—but now, what reason did she have to stay in Logan? The idea flashed across her mind in ultra-bright neon. Without a second thought, she gr
abbed for her phone and dialed.
“Fiona Welch,” came the voice on the other end.
“Hi, Dr. Welch,” Alex said, breathlessly. “This is Alex Foamer. I’m so sorry it’s taken me this long to get back to you. I’d hoped to get my answer to you long before your deadline, but I’ve had some personal issues these past couple of weeks that have kind of laid me flat.”
“Good to hear from you, Alex,” returned Dr. Welch. “Don’t worry about it. I’m running a bit behind schedule myself on the symposium. I hope things are going better for you now.”
“Oh, much better, thanks,” Alex said honestly. Her outlook on life was about a hundred times better than it had been five minutes earlier. “I am very interested in participating in the symposium. Is it possible you might still have a place for me?” Like a fifth-grader, she crossed her fingers.
“Absolutely!” Dr. Welch cried. “Oh, I’m so happy you decided to accept. I’m having a hard time finding people due to the fact that the symposium happens over the holidays.”
“Well, I’d love to take part in it,” Alex replied. “If you can get me the information, I’ll be wherever you need me to be whenever you need me there.”
“That’s what I like to hear!” Dr. Welch laughed. “I’ll email you the information packet and once you have all the necessary forms filled out, we’ll get your travel all scheduled. Make sure to take a look at the subjects we’re planning to cover and get back to me as soon as possible on which ones you’d like to tackle. You’ll need to get started on planning your presentations here in the next week or so.”
“Oh, I’m so excited!” Alex squealed. “I can’t wait to get started!”
After they hung up, Alex sat fidgeting on the park bench, her mind much lighter and airier than it had been in previous weeks. She had a plan, and it felt so good.
And then the downer hit. The series would only last three months. Twenty cities. And then she would be back in Logan. What then? Would Lucas and Olivia be married by then? Would Sealey be talking to her by that point?
“Hey.”
Alex’s head shot up. Sealey Witchburn was coming toward her across the frozen ground, a sheepish look on his face. She’d never seen him look sheepish. But the look seemed appropriate. He should be sheepish after what he’d put her through.
“Sealey!” she cried, relief and frustration filling her. “Where have you been?! I’ve been worried about you!”
Sealey looked surprised. “You have?” he questioned, brow furrowed. “Why?”
“You just disappeared!” Alex cried. Sealey seated himself next to her and leaned back casually against the bench, eyeing her strangely. “You gave me this wounded, confused look, walked away, and I haven’t seen you or heard from you since! For all I knew, you were suicidal!” she shrieked.
“Really, Alex?” Sealey said, his eyebrow raised. His expression became suddenly much more recognizable. Confidence. Amusement. “Do I strike you as the suicidal sort?”
“Well, no, but next time you decide to disappear like that, just let me know where you’re going, okay? Then I won’t freak out so much. I called and called and I left you a message and you never called back!”
The sheepish look returned to his face. “Sorry,” he apologized. “I went out of town on business and left my phone on the plane. The airline is mailing it back to me. They said I should have it back by tomorrow morning.”
“And you don’t understand the concept of a pay phone?” Alex said, giving him a dirty look. “Or, heck, just borrowing a phone? You know, ’cause it’s not like every single person you come in contact with doesn’t have one.”
“You know what it sounds like?” Sealey asked, smiling more genuinely at her now. “It sounds like you missed me.”
Alex stopped short and stared at him. “You think I missed you?” she said, her voice sounding strangled. “You think that is what this is about?” Her thoughts felt panicky, but she wasn’t quite sure why.
“Yeah,” he said, his smile widening. “But that’s okay, Foamer. You can miss me. I’m okay with that. In fact, it’s actually really good news.”
“Oh really?” Alex asked with sarcasm, fully expecting some in return. “And why’s that?”
“Because I missed you.” There was no sarcasm. None. Just straight-forward, wide-eyed sincerity.
Alex gawked at him. He had missed her? A strange warmth was filling her chest. She watched him, sitting there, unconcerned. There was something different in the air. Sealey was on edge. He didn’t look it, but she could feel it. An odd, electric tension was emanating from him.
“You missed me?” she clarified, narrowing her eyes at him.
“Didn’t I just say that?” he said, smiling teasingly at her. “Yes, I did. Very much. Because believe it or not, I’ve gotten pretty used to you, Foamer.” He winked at her.
“Oh, well . . . that’s . . .” Her mind was blank. Confusion swam in her head. Nice? Interesting? Really, really . . . “Unexpected,” she finally finished. What was Sealey doing? Why was he sitting here next to her, perfectly composed, with a weird smile on his face? Why didn’t he appear to be devastated about Olivia and Lucas?
“You look like you have something else to say,” Sealey prompted at her perplexed expression. The odd, bright smile was still firmly attached to his face.
“Olivia.” It was the only word Alex could get out. But she thought it would probably indicate the direction of her thoughts.
“Ah, Olivia,” Sealey said. He nodded slowly, as though mulling over his next words. “I lied about Olivia,” he said smoothly.
Whatever words she had been expecting, those were not the ones.
“I’m sorry, what?” she said, uncomprehending.
“I lied,” Sealey said straightforwardly. “I told you I was in love with Olivia and that I wanted to take her away from Lucas. I lied.” He shrugged as he dropped this bombshell, as though its impact were a sad inevitability. For some reason, the careless motion calmed Alex enough to clear her head and allow her to think. Because while he appeared to be uncaring, she knew he wasn’t. Something in the taut position of his shoulders told her he was every bit as aware of the import of his words as she was.
“So . . . you never planned to take her away from Lucas?” Alex clarified.
“No,” he stated. “I never planned to steal her away. I never even considered something like that to be possible.”
“So then, why—” Alex began, but Sealey interrupted her.
“I was never in love with her, either,” he said calmly. “Olivia is an amazing woman, but she’s Lucas’s amazing woman. She always has been.”
Alex looked at him incredulously. She knew he was trying to tell her something beyond what he was saying. Otherwise the electricity in the air would have fizzled by now. “Okay, but . . . but . . . why would you do this? Why would you bother to tell me you were in love with Olivia if you weren’t?”
“Because I needed a plausible excuse,” Sealey said, looking at her earnestly. “I needed a reason for why I was helping you with the Lucas project and that was the only one I could come up with on short notice. You caught me off guard with your demands to know my reasoning, and that was the first thing I thought of.”
Alex stared at him. She understood the words coming out of his mouth, but she had no idea what he was trying to tell her.
“Sealey,” she said, quite impressed with her ability to keep her voice calm and regulated. “Please. Please tell me what’s going on here. Why are you telling me this now? Why did you lie to me? And more than anything, if you weren’t in love with Olivia, why did you spend three months attempting to bring me and Lucas together?”
Sealey smiled softly and genuinely at the confused look on her face. Again, a reaction Alex had not been expecting. He was a completely different person than the depressed, defeated, disappointed man she had been anticipating. He seemed almost . . . happy.
“Alex,” he said, looking into her eyes. He moved forward, taking her hand.
He raised his other hand and brushed his fingers across her face. Strange tingles and sparks raced up and down her arms and legs. She almost jerked away, so unexpected was the contact. “It was because of you. For me, it’s always been you.”
“What’s always been me?” she pressed. She glanced down at their clasped hands, feeling as though she was missing something both very important and very obvious. She couldn’t help thinking that if he would just back up and let her thoughts clear a bit, she would immediately understand what he was trying to say. But he wasn’t moving and her mind remained clouded with a mixture of confusion, numbness, and sheer panic. “What are you talking about, Sealey?”
“I never intended to let Lucas have you. This entire process, the last three months,” he replied, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “For me, it’s all been about me and you. I only ever wanted you.”
HE SPOKE THE last words softly, in a tone Alex had never actually heard him use before. It was warm and sincere. Vulnerable.
Alex was holding her breath, unconsciously hoping that might aid her verbal comprehension. “How does that make any semblance of sense?” she finally asked. “The whole point of the project was to bring Lucas and me together, and you and Olivia together. It couldn’t have possibly accomplished anything else.”
The warmth of his hand against her cheek was muddying her thought processes. She felt her legs begin to shake slightly in response to his touch.
“That was your goal,” Sealey said, giving her a pointed look. “It was never mine. It’s difficult to explain.” Sealey looked away, out into the park, taking a deep breath. He backed away, contenting himself with holding her hand in his.
“Alex, I’ve been interested in you . . . forever,” he finished lamely. “Almost from the first time I ever saw you. But you never looked twice at me. Your eyes were only for Lucas. I know you thought your crush was a secret, but, really, it was obvious. Everyone could see it.” He squeezed her hand sympathetically. “I didn’t think I could manage to make you see me until that particular dream of yours had died. And I didn’t think I would be able to convince you to just give up on Lucas. I wasn’t sure exactly what to do.” He gave her a wry half-smile. “But then you solved that problem for me. You approached me on the subject. So I took my opportunity—likely the only one I’d get.”
Catching Lucas Riley Page 19
