by Andrew Grey
“Willy.”
He turned to Mr. Webster, keeping the boxes in front of him; otherwise he was going to put on quite a show, and there was only one person he wanted to see him that way. “Sorry.” He blinked.
“When you’re done there, could you make a pass through the back of the store? I need to work in the back for a while and make sure everything is running smoothly in the pharmacy.” Mr. Webster was smiling. “It looks like it’s going to be a good day.” The store was getting busier by the second, which was very unusual for a Tuesday morning.
“Sure, no problem.” Willy turned to finish up what he was doing and filled the next display before heading to the back with the cart. Then he did as Mr. Webster asked, walking the various aisles, making his presence known in case anyone needed help.
“You should be ashamed!” A voice, male and growly, carried over the counters. Willy hurried over as a second echoed the sentiment.
“You and your kind aren’t welcome here. Maybe you should leave. Go to San Francisco with all the other freaks!”
Willy rounded the corner to where Jamie was cornered by Mark Jeffries and Scott Phillips, two of the star football players when he’d been in school and two of the biggest, loudest assholes he’d ever met in his life. Those two were joined at the hip, and their mission had been to make everyone’s life as big a hell as possible.
“That’s enough, both of you,” Reggie said as he stepped up, feet wide, the man a brick wall of not taking crap from anyone. “Don’t you have places you need to be?”
Scott, the lead asshole, turned to Reggie with a sneer. “Nope. We’re fine right here. He’s the one who’s a problem.” He pointed at Jamie, who stood as tall as he could, trying to hold together some of his dignity.
“I suggest that you two quit causing trouble and move on, now.” Reggie was strong, and Willy puffed his chest out in pride for him. He wasn’t going to let them get away with their usual crap.
“You’re going to stick up for a fag like him?” Scott pressed. “I can’t believe it. We got ourselves a fag-loving sheriff.”
“That’s enough,” Mr. Webster said, stepping into the fray from the back of the store. “We’ll have none of your mouth in here.” He turned to Reggie and then back to the troublemakers. “I don’t want to see either of the two of you in the store any longer. And I’ll be calling your parents just to make sure they know you aren’t welcome and why. Your behavior is disgraceful.” He was such a great guy. Willy felt honored to work for him. “If they come back, I want them charged with trespassing.”
“You heard him,” Reggie said. “I suggest you leave now, or I will arrest you and charge you with trespassing. We’ll see if a nice cell will cool the two of you off.”
Scott’s resolve crumbled as Willy watched. He must have seen his position was hopeless. He’d been called out in a huge way, and the bully wasn’t going to be able to stand up to it. Not really. He stormed toward the front door, with Mark following behind him and everyone else sort of tagging along like a wave driven by curiosity, the possibility of a proverbial train wreck pulling them all in the same direction. Scott left the store, the door sliding open and then closing behind him.
Mark turned to Reggie, aiming a look of such venom and hatred that Willy nearly took a step back. “The only people who stand up for faggots are other faggots.” He sneered, and Willy stood stock-still, fear planting his feet in place. He took a step back to get out of the line of verbal fire when he saw a twitch in Reggie’s cheek. It was barely noticeable, but it was there. If he hadn’t been looking so closely at Reggie, Willy probably would never have seen it, but it was the only indication as far as Willy could see of just how dead-on Mark’s arrow truly was.
“Leave right now,” Reggie said. “That’s enough out of that foul mouth of yours. One more word and I’ll take you in for threatening a police officer.”
Mark stared back at Reggie and then slowly turned, an unreadable little smile on his lips. He took a final step, and the front door slid open. Mark stepped outside, and Reggie followed him. The door slipped closed, blocking out the sounds from the street, leaving the store in an envelope of silence and shock.
Mr. Webster broke it. “Okay. Let’s get back to work.”
Willy nodded and looked around to get his bearings and try to get his mind to process the next item he needed to work on.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Webster. I should have just stayed home,” Jamie said as Reggie came back inside. “I’m sorry,” he repeated to Reggie, his head down, cheeks reddening. Willy felt so bad for him. The cocky, misbehaving kid he’d been seemed to have flown out the window. Between the stuff with the racing and now the revelation from the rest area, it was hard to believe he was the same person.
And maybe he wasn’t. The conversation from the night before flashed through Willy’s mind. Could it be that someone could build the image they wanted the world to see and hide behind it so well that when it was gone, there was nothing left?
“Nothing for you to apologize for,” Reggie said, “except the motorcycle racing. The rest of it, well, that’s people being small and petty.”
Jamie nodded. “Let me get what I came here for and I’ll get out of everyone’s hair.” He walked quickly toward the back of the store.
Willy shook his head and returned to the tasks at hand.
“Is there something I can help you with, Sheriff?” Mr. Webster asked.
“I was stopping in to get some chocolate for my desk at work, and things got a little sidetracked.” Reggie wandered off as well.
Willy made sure Rose was okay at the register. She was retired and worked part-time to supplement her income. Then he went to the back room to bring out more product to fill the shelves. His job had become sort of a catchall once he had the books done. Willy wasn’t going to complain at all. It meant he got to work more hours and it kept him busy.
In the back, he filled the cart with cases once again and pulled it back to the floor. As he stepped through the swinging door, he nearly collided with Jamie. He excused himself, continued on down the second aisle, and got to work, moving toward the back as he went.
“Sheriff,” Jamie said softly from down the next aisle. Willy stilled, knowing he shouldn’t be listening in. “Can I ask you something?” He sounded so nervous, but with a hint of hope in his voice.
“Of course,” Reggie answered. “For the record, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I did my best to try to prevent it.”
“I know. Ummm… about that and what Mark said… I saw your face….”
Willy’s stomach clenched and he took a deep breath.
“Yes?” Reggie prodded.
“How well do you understand what I’m trying to work through? I don’t know anyone else, and….” Jamie gasped. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked anything like that. It was completely stupid and none of my business, and—”
Willy was afraid to move an inch.
“I understand what you’re going through very well. I’ve been through it myself. You have to decide who you want to be and if you want to be a victim or tackle things head-on. Hold your shoulders back and your head high and own who you are.” Reggie’s words made Willy proud and ashamed at the same time.
“Do you own who you are?” Jamie asked.
“I answered your question.”
It grew quiet for a few seconds, and Willy cleared his throat as he opened a box and started filling shelves. He tried not to think too hard about what had just happened, but it was nearly impossible. Reggie had just outed himself to Jamie Fullerton. Willy understood why he’d done it. Reggie hadn’t wanted Jamie to feel so alone. He’d wanted him to know that there was someone else in town who understood. Willy was fully aware of how that felt. But if Jamie knew, then it was only a matter of time before other people found out that the sheriff was gay, and tongues would wag all over town.
Willy knew Reggie was right. The best thing to do was to own up to who you were and let the chips fall where
they may. If people didn’t understand, then fuck them. But Willy didn’t have that luxury. If his father learned that he was gay and that he’d been seeing the sheriff, lying about it…. There would be hell to pay, make no mistake.
“Willy,” Reggie said as he came around the end of the aisle. “You doing okay?” He smiled, keeping his tone normal, but Willy felt anything but normal. His plans for trying to be independent and build the basics of a life separate from his father before this came out had just gone up in smoke.
“I don’t know,” he answered, looking squarely at Reggie, his heart breaking a little as the air around him chilled and he realized the companionship that had filled his days with warmth was turning cold. “Are you okay? Maybe a little feverish?” He raised his eyebrows. “Took leave of your senses?” he whispered, and Reggie nodded.
“You heard that?” Reggie whispered, and Willy nodded slowly. “Come to the house for a few minutes after work.”
Willy turned away and shook his head. “I can’t.” He continued filling the shelves, only half watching what he was doing. “I don’t dare.” He broke down the box and opened another one.
“Willy, why don’t you take your break?” Mr. Webster said.
“Okay.” Willy took the cart to the back room, leaving it loaded, and went out through the back door to the small parking lot behind the store. He closed the door and leaned against the building. Reggie had said that he cared for him. Hell, the other night he’d made Willy feel like he was the center of the universe. Of course, he should have known that was an illusion. He was just some dumb kid after all.
Willy wrapped his arms around himself to ward off the chill that rose from inside.
Reggie’s cruiser pulled into the lot and parked nearby. He got out and strode across to where Willy stood. “I know you’re scared, and I don’t blame you, but I couldn’t let Jamie believe he was all alone. He’s so lost—”
“I get it, I do. You felt for him, and that does you credit. But in case you haven’t figured it out, I’m the one who’s now all alone. At least Jamie has his dad, who seems to be supporting him. My family never will, and I really don’t want to be homeless, so I’m sorry if I’m not dancing a jig or running through town waving those rainbow flags.” He looked around, thankful the lot was nearly empty and the area deserted except for them.
“I know you’re scared—”
“I’m terrified! You’ve seen my back. You know what my father is capable of. What if he decides to beat the devil out of me or some such demented thing?” Willy hardened his gaze even as Reggie softened his. “No. I’m sorry. But I can’t come out to your house after work, or ever. And it isn’t going to matter anyway. Things have a way of getting out, and as soon as it does, my dad will move heaven and earth to make sure I never see you again outside of an official capacity.” Willy’s legs shook. He’d been counting on Reggie’s support, and that had evaporated like the fog against the sun. “Just go back to work. I have only a few minutes more, and then I have things I have to do. I can’t afford to lose this job. It’s the only thing I have that’s my own right now.”
He tried like hell not to gaze into Reggie’s eyes, and failed. They were filled with just as much hurt as had taken up residence in Willy’s gut. His heart ached, and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it now. Reggie had been Reggie—he’d tried to help someone. That was Reggie’s nature and part of why Willy had fallen for him so quickly.
Willy turned away, opened the back door, and returned to the stockroom, shutting the door behind him. He locked it and went to the restroom, closing and locking the door before leaning against it, breathing deeply. He had to get himself together enough that he could work through the rest of the day. After he closed up and went home or wherever he could find to think, then he could fall apart.
WILLY WASN’T interested in going home after work. He needed some time to deal with what had happened, and he didn’t think that would be possible there. Willy could imagine his father waiting up to talk to him… or talk at him was more like it.
He went to his car, turned out of the parking area onto the main street, and just kept going. The streetlights flashed past, growing more distant and then nonexistent as he left the town farther behind.
He was alone, physically as well as emotionally, the town in the distance behind him just like the relationship he’d thought he was building with Reggie.
Lights to the right caught his attention, and Willy realized he was coming up on the rest area he and Reggie had explored that previous Saturday. Willy intended to pull in and turn around, nothing more. Driving around aimlessly wasn’t going to do him any good, and he was going to have to go home and face his father eventually.
Willy slowed and pulled in, passing by the building where a number of cars had parked. He glided through the parking area and came to a stop behind an old white van with blacked-out windows. It was the one that had taken off the other day when he’d been here with Reggie. He pulled into the parking space a few places away and got out, thinking he could use the restroom.
Outside, it was quiet, insects and night animals providing a backdrop for the otherwise silent evening. No one seemed to be around, even though cars were there. Willy walked slowly toward the restrooms, trying not to look like he was interested in anything other than the facilities. He thought he might have heard voices from inside the van, but he wasn’t sure and didn’t investigate or go any closer.
The restroom was empty, which Willy thought very strange. He went into one of the stalls, avoiding the end ones, and peed, thinking for a few seconds. He had a very bad feeling that something not right was going on. Of course, he didn’t know what, and he wasn’t interested in getting involved. Willy pulled out his phone and brought up the note feature, entering the license number of the van before he forgot it. Then he finished up, washed his hands, and left again, trying to remember as many other license numbers as he could as he went back to his car.
Willy’s heart pounded as he got in, locked the door, and entered more license numbers. Then, as he saw a small group of men step out from the side of the building, Willy started the engine, backed out of the spot, and pulled onto the highway back toward town. He didn’t stop and barely slowed down until he was parked on the street outside his house. His heart was still racing, and he took deep breaths to calm himself, going over what he’d seen again.
It made no real sense to him, none of it did, and maybe it was nothing, but why would a group of men gather behind the restrooms after dark? Sex was the obvious answer, and maybe that’s all it was. But why would one of the guys leave people in the van, then? Was this some sick parent who left his kids in the car while he went to get his jollies?
Willy made a decision. Reggie, something going on at rest area. Saw same van parked there. Think there were people in it. Group of men behind building. Have license plate numbers. He sent the text and got an almost immediate answer.
Where are you?
He looked up at the front of the house, his home—at least until his dad found out about him. The lights were on and it seemed warm and inviting. At home.
Can you come to the house? I’ll have the garage door open and you can pull right in.
Willy read Reggie’s message and nearly sent a no. With a sigh, he answered yes and drove away from his house out toward Reggie’s.
There was very little traffic, so it wasn’t long before he pulled into Reggie’s garage and closed the door. The night air had grown chilly, and he hurried across the yard.
Reggie met him on the porch, holding the door so Willy could go right inside. “What were you doing out there?’ Reggie asked as soon as the door closed. Before Willy could stop him, Reggie had tugged him into his arms. “I told you I thought something was going on there.”
“Reggie….” Willy tapped his shoulder even as he drank in the heat of his body. “I’m not here for that.” He had to be firm. Nothing had changed since this afternoon. He pulled away, even though he wanted to sta
y in Reggie’s embrace. “I was upset and took a drive to clear my head. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going and found myself out there. I went in to use the bathroom, but no one was in there. It was empty. There were cars, but no one was around. That van was in the lot, and I heard voices from inside, I think.” He reached into his pocket. “These are the license plates of most of the cars there. The first one is the van.”
God, Reggie smelled so good, Willy couldn’t help taking a step forward just to get a little more of him, and he shivered. Reggie was in jeans, with a tight T-shirt stretched over his chest. Willy’s fingers itched to touch, and he ached to feel the two of them together, to hold him again.
Willy held out his phone and let Reggie take it to jot down the plates. “As I was leaving, a group of men came around the side of the building. I don’t know why they were there, and I didn’t recognize any of them. They were whispering and talking quickly.” That was all Willy knew. “I really need to go. My dad will find out about you because nothing stays quiet in this town, and then….” Willy shrugged and moved toward the door, but Reggie stopped him with a hand on his arm. Willy turned, and Reggie pulled him to him, encircling him in a tight embrace. Reggie kissed him hard and deep, taking his breath away.
“Stay…,” Reggie said quietly.
“I can’t.” Willy wanted to, though. At least for now, as long as they kept quiet, there was a chance for them. But now Willy had to back away and…. His heart ached and burned at the thought. Reggie was temptation come to life. “You made your choice, and I understand it’s part of who you are… but I can’t….” Tears threatened, and he had to get away before he embarrassed himself completely. “I thought you understood that I needed some time, that I was trying to be independent… that….” He held his breath for a few seconds and released it slowly so he didn’t hyperventilate.
“You didn’t see his face,” Reggie said. “I know I’m the sheriff, but I have a heart, and to see that kid, someone younger than both of us, trying to swim through so much pain and uncertainty. I tried to help him….” He swallowed. “I thought I was being so careful.”
