Look Always Forward (Bellingwood Book 11)

by Diane Greenwood Muir

  At the thought of jam, Polly's stomach rumbled and she sliced some bread and dropped it in the toaster. She wasn't sure how she'd gotten so fortunate in meeting the wonderful people that she knew. Her life as a child was so different than Rebecca's was going to be. It had been wonderful, she loved her Dad, Mary and Sylvester, but she hadn't had been exposed to other adults. There weren't any aunts and uncles in her life and her friends' parents were just nameless entities that gave permission to do things.

  But Rebecca was learning about life from so many different people. She spent time with Beryl every Saturday morning and Bill Sturtz had enjoyed teaching the three kids how to carve wood this summer. Jean Gardner was giving Rebecca invaluable experience in the kitchen and the girl was enjoying it all.

  There had been some rough nights the first month after Sarah's death. Polly and Obiwan usually crept into her bedroom after she'd spent time crying to make sure that she would relax enough to fall asleep. The dog was gentle with Rebecca, climbing up beside her and settling in. Polly generally sat in the chair beside her bed and held her hand. She wanted Rebecca to grieve and cry, but didn't want her to have to do any of it alone.

  After a few weeks, the nights weren't quite as long and the days began to brighten again. In the beginning of the grief process, Rebecca was desperate to see Evelyn. They'd spent so much time together that their connection was strong. Evelyn would pick Rebecca up and take her away, sometimes out for lunch, other times out for a drive and every once in a while, they would sit outside behind Sycamore House by themselves and just talk. This was another adult who was a big part of Rebecca's life.

  The toast popped up and Polly reached up for a plate. She buttered it and spread some of Rebecca's jam on top, then sat at the peninsula. She was spending too much time reflecting this morning. But in truth, she didn't know what to do with herself today. It was all hers. She didn't have to be anywhere or do anything. Polly leaned back and stretched. What a great day.

  Then she remembered Grey and the conversation Jeff was planning to have with him this morning. It bothered Polly that she hadn't realized. He never seemed hung over and when she'd been with him, there was no hint that he had a drinking problem.

  She wanted to text Jeff and ask more questions. When was he going to talk to Grey? Had he already? What was he going to say? How was he going to handle it?

  Leia sniffed the plate on the counter and Polly instinctively moved it away. But it broke her concentration.

  "No," she said, pushing the cat back. "You don't get my breakfast. I get my breakfast." She picked the cat up, snuggled her and then reached down to release her onto the floor.

  "Okay kids, it's time to get moving. First a shower, then I have no idea what. But it's going to be fun!"

  ~~~

  "Hey Andrew, it's just you and me again today. Wanna hang out?" Polly asked, stopping at his nook under the stairs. He'd moved most of his books to his room at home, leaving nothing on the shelves and only pens, pencils and paper in the desk.

  "Nah, it's okay," he said.

  "Come on. We haven't been alone forever. I want an adventure. Come with me," she pleaded.

  "Didn't you already find your dead body?" He scratched a pencil on a sheet of paper, circling round and round until he'd created a tornado.

  Polly gently popped him on the back of the head. "Nope. You don't get to mope. You have to come with me. I feel too good to let one of my favorite people feel sorry for himself."

  "What's Henry got to do with it?" Andrew asked, looking up at her with a hint of a grin.

  "That's right. He's feeling sorry for himself because he gets to spend the entire weekend playing with car stuff. Come on. First stop, the coffee shop and we'll tell your mom that we're leaving town together."

  He finally laughed and stood up. Andrew was practically as tall as Polly and he was still just as adorable as ever. She wanted to squeeze him tight, but knew that would make him miserable.

  "Let me go upstairs and get my book," he said. "Just in case you find yourself in a girly store somewhere."

  "Run. I'll meet you in the truck."

  Andrew attempted to move past her to get to the door leading upstairs and Polly stepped into his path. When he moved to the left, she mimicked him.

  "What are you doing?" he asked.

  She wrapped her arms around him and squeezed. "Hugging you. Thanks for coming out with me today. I wanted a partner in crime and didn't know who I might find."

  He went limp in her grasp until she let go, then looked at her, waiting until she moved.

  "Fine," she said. "Go upstairs. I'll be the lonely old lady in the truck." She let him pass and smiled to herself. Now the day had potential. Andrew was usually up for anything, no matter how crazy it got.

  She sat in her truck and fiddled with the digital readouts. They hadn't taken the time to read the manual, but so far she'd managed to make everything work. She loved the backup camera. One of these days she planned to scare the daylights out of Henry with it.

  "I'm ready," Andrew said, climbing in and buckling up. "Do you know where we're going?"

  "First to the coffee shop. They're still giving away free coffee and I want to see who shows up."

  Andrew put his book on the seat beside him. "You know, don't you?"

  "Know what?" Polly asked, backing out of the garage.

  "Rebecca told you. I know she did."

  "Why don't you tell me your side?"

  "Because she hates me. I don't know why I thought..."

  "Thought what?"

  "It sounds stupid. And really mean."

  Polly stopped at the highway, waiting for traffic to pass. She looked at him. "What do mean - mean?"

  "I thought she was mine and that just sounds bad. She's not anybody's. But I guess I thought we were together already."

  "I suppose that assuming something without having a conversation isn't too bright," Polly said. "Did you think about asking her to the dance?"

  "I did ask!"

  "Are you sure that's how the conversation went?" Polly glanced at him, not surprised to see confusion on his face.

  "I asked her to go to the dance with me," he repeated. "What else would I have done?"

  Polly pulled into a parking space next to the coffee shop and turned the truck off. "Think back over your conversation. Did you truly ask her or did you make an assumption and set forth an expectation." She opened her car door and smiled over at him.

  "A what?" he asked.

  "You think about it while we're inside. We'll talk about it when we get back in the car. If you can't figure it out on your own, I'll be glad to help you through it." She held the front door open and breathed in the scent of coffee. It was heavenly. There were several people at tables around the room, all smiling, with drinks in front of them.

  Camille waved at her from behind the counter, where she was working with Helena at the cash register. The older woman nodded, taking it all in. Everybody was on site today. Sky and Rena were hovering behind the counter, talking animatedly to each other and Benny was wiping tables.

  "What do you think?"

  Polly jumped and spun around. Jeff had come up behind her.

  "I don't know," she said. "What do you think?"

  "It's going to be okay. We need to replace Julie, but not right away. It seems kind of crass."

  Andrew leaned in. "That was the dead girl Polly found?"

  "Yes," she replied, scowling at him. "Go get something to drink and find your mom."

  Andrew walked away from them and Polly asked, "How did it go?"

  "With Grey?"

  "Yes. What happened this morning? I've been dying to know, but didn't want to bother you."

  "I talked to him. He's an alcoholic."

  Polly's shoulders slumped. "Damn it."

  "He admitted it right away," Jeff said. "He's gone through rehab and has been clean for twelve years. He thought he could handle it but after the accident, he just didn't have it in him."

  "What
are we going to do?"

  Jeff shrugged. "That's up to you. He says it is completely up to you. He promised to find an AA meeting and get a sponsor - someone to talk to. But if you want him gone, he'll go."

  "I don't want him to go," Polly replied. "But what if he can't get this dealt with?"

  "He told me that he was willing to be accountable. He promised to call me this evening and tell me that he'd been to a meeting and had a sponsor."

  "And tomorrow? What about tomorrow and the next day?" Polly asked.

  Jeff smiled at her. "You do know that one of the major tenets of AA is that they take it one day at a time. If you want to trust him to make these steps, then that's what we have to do. If you don't want to, he'll understand and move on."

  "I know it sounds crazy," Polly said. "But I want to trust him. We've only known him a week, but like I told Henry, he's worth it. I just know it."

  "That's my girl," Jeff said. He hooked his arm in hers and led her to the counter. "Do you know what you'd like to order today?"

  Polly looked up at the wall and then at Sky who had come over to greet her. "Hey there, Miss Giller," he said. "What would you like to drink?"

  "I'd like an iced mocha," she said.

  "Anything special?" he asked.

  "Nope," she laughed. "Just bring on the caffeine."

  He smiled and turned back to Rena.

  "Is Sal here?" Polly asked Jeff. "She should be enjoying this after all that she's been through to get here."

  "She and Sylvie are in the bakery - plotting."

  "Polly!" Camille exclaimed. "I'm so glad you're here. Do you have time to meet my mother?"

  Polly glanced around the shop. "I'd love to."

  Sky handed her a cup, Polly took a tentative drink and scowled.

  "What?" he asked in desperation. "Is something wrong?"

  She grinned and winked at him. "I'm kidding. It's great. Thank you."

  Rena stood behind him, quietly laughing.

  "That was mean," he said. "I was going to tell you that Rena made it."

  Animated chatter reached Polly's ears before she saw Andrew leading three women from the bakery. Sylvie and Sal were listening to a tall, regal black woman describe a dish she made in her own kitchen.

  Camille stepped out from behind the counter and took the woman's arm, stopping the conversation. "Mama, I want you to meet Polly Giller." She turned and said, "Polly, this is my mother, Abigail Specht."

  The woman stepped away from her daughter and took both of Polly's hands in hers. "I've been hearing much about you. It's nice to meet you."

  "It's nice to meet you too," Polly said. "We're fortunate to have your daughter here in Bellingwood."

  "Yes you are," Abigail said. "She's one of a kind." She turned to include Sylvie and Sal in the conversation and said, "Your friends have been showing me your facility. This is quite some adventure you all are on. And Milty here tells me that there's already been a death. That's too bad. I hope it doesn't affect your business."

  Polly glanced at Camille. "Milty?"

  The young woman shook her head. "My brother anointed me with that name and it stuck. Please forget you ever heard it."

  "Does Jeff know?"

  "Know what?" Jeff asked. He'd been wandering the room, greeting guests.

  "My girl is known as Milty when she's with friends and family," Abigail said. She brushed her daughter's hair back from her face. "It doesn't seem right that the only time she'll hear that name is when she is with us in Omaha."

  "Mama," Camille protested.

  "If they're going to be your family, they need to know everything about you." Abigail Specht took Polly's arm and pulled her aside. "I'm a tad worried about this dead girl that was found in the alley. Are there any suspects yet? Is my little girl safe here?"

  Polly rubbed her chin. This was never easy to explain. "I'm certain that she's perfectly safe. We have a wonderful police department and the county sheriff and his deputies are quite professional. Even though they might not know much right away, they're working on it."

  "She's looking forward to this position," Abigail said. "I'd hate for her to regret her decision to move to Bellingwood."

  Polly looked into the woman's stern eyes. Nope, she didn't want to ever cross her. "She's safe and we're looking forward to her time with us, too. She'll be working most closely with Sylvie and I think they've connected already."

  The woman smiled warmly and said, "Thank you. I just wanted everything to be out in the open between us. She's a special girl and since I can't be here to watch over her, I want to know the people who will."

  "Mama, quit scaring Polly," Camille said, pulling at her mother's arm. "You aren't that intimidating. Stop it."

  Polly gave her head a quick shake. Abigail Specht was definitely intimidating.

  "How are things coming in the kitchen?" Polly asked Sylvie.

  "I'll be in here on Monday," Sylvie replied. "I just want to play and make messes and bake before I bring staff in." She looked around the room. "There's no clock in here," she said.

  "It's ten thirty," Jeff said. "You're okay."

  "No I'm not. I told Rachel I'd be back by now. She's probably worrying." Sylvie nodded at everyone and said, "It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Specht. I hope to see you again."

  Before anyone could respond, she ran for the front door and was gone.

  "She said it was okay that I go with you," Andrew said quietly. "Are we still doing an adventure?"

  "Let's see what we can find," Polly responded.

  They said their goodbyes and went back to the truck.

  "People are going to like that place," Andrew said.

  Polly pointed at his cup. "What did you get to drink?"

  "A strawberry smoothie," he responded. "It's too warm for hot chocolate."

  "How are their smoothies?"

  "Great. You want to try it?"

  Polly smiled at his offer. "No thanks. I'll order one another time. Where shall we begin?"

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Browsing through the bookstore and then wandering through the museum and gift shop at the Boone & Scenic Valley Railroad had taken the entire morning. As they walked back to the car, Andrew asked Polly about lunch. He was starving.

  "Where shall we go?" she asked.

  "I don't care. Not McDonalds. I'm not a kid anymore."

  Polly laughed. "No. You're not. Do you want to drive over to Ames?"

  He looked at her, his face alight with expectation. "Really? That would be awesome."

  "Maybe when we're done with lunch, we'll go to Goodwill to see what they have for used books. There are always interesting finds at the thrift stores."

  "That's where Rebecca and Kayla were going," he said, his shoulders slumping as he thought about his friends.

  Polly pressed her fob to unlock the doors on the truck and watched him walk to the passenger side. Once they were in and buckled up, she said, "I suspect they're done at Goodwill. Stephanie was planning to get an early start."

  "I don't want to see them anyway," he grumped.

  "I know you don't. Where shall we eat?" She could almost see his mind spinning as he considered the possibilities.

  Andrew knitted his brows together. "I don't know," he said.

  "You have a few minutes to think about it. Be creative. We can go anywhere."

  "Is there somewhere you've never gotten to eat?" Andrew asked.

  Polly laughed. "There is. Every time I've tried to eat there in the past, something comes up. Do you want to try it?"

  "Okay, where?"

  "The big barbecue restaurant. Hickory Park. They have ice cream for dessert."

  "Yes!" he said with great enthusiasm. "Everybody talks about how awesome it is and I've never gone. That would be so cool." He opened the bag of books he'd purchased at the bookstore and held up a book for Polly to see.

  She glanced at it and smiled. "Xanth?" she asked.

  "Yeah. Is it good?"

  Polly nodded. "It was a classic in
its time. Have you figured out what Xanth is?"

  Andrew gave her a strange look. "The place?"

  "Yes, but say the author's name," Polly replied.

  "Piers Anthony?" Andrew asked.

  "Say it all together as one word."

  "Piersanthony." He heard it. "Xanth! I get it. That's pretty cool."

  "It took me a while," she said with a laugh. "If you keep reading his stories, you'll find more and more puns like that. He had fun with it. You will too."

  Andrew opened the book, glanced up at her and then started to read.

  "You don't want to talk about Rebecca?" Polly asked.

  "No," he muttered.

  "Did you think about what you might have said to offend her?"

  "No. Whatever." He slouched toward the truck door, trying to put more space between them.

  "So you want to just keep this all bottled up and be uncomfortable around Rebecca?"

  Andrew slammed the book shut - pretty ineffectually since it was a paperback and didn't make much noise. "Sorry," he said, sheepishly. "I don't want to talk about it."

  "Andrew, this isn't like you," Polly said. "Your mother said you were rotten the other night. You aren't talking to Rebecca and Kayla and now you're exploding at me. You can't do this. You're sucking all the fun out of your life."

  "She hurt me," he said. "I thought she liked me and then she just said no. I get it that I'm a boy, but we have feelings too."

  It was all Polly could do not to laugh out loud, but she heard the pain in his voice and remembered that even at this age, love just hurt sometimes.

  "Oh Andrew, this is not the last time you are going to be hurt by a girl. It might not even be the last time you get hurt by Rebecca. But you can't let this destroy your whole life."

  "It's only bad when I have to talk about it. Maybe we shouldn't talk about it."

  "But you aren't speaking to your best friend. That's no fun. You'll need each other this year."