She hadn't fit in since her mother died and that was a fact. But what scared her was that she hadn't fit anywhere. She didn't belong anywhere, and she wanted a place to call home, so badly.
Strangely, she hadn't regretted leaving her comfortable home in Philadelphia. She didn't miss the beautiful clothes she used to wear every day. She didn't miss her folks, not even her father. He had changed so much since her mother died. He had become like a stranger to her. And Rachel couldn't live with that change.
She'd never accepted his new marriage. That, she recognized was her own fault. She hadn't given Sylvia a chance. But they were so different.
She didn't wish for the comforts she had. Material things meant little to Rachel. Life meant a lot to her though. And hers was about to end. She had to find some peace about that.
She couldn't think on how they might kill her. But she could pray to God for some kind of miracle. Pray that her death come easy for her and she took comfort in the fact that she was Christian and knew about the afterlife she could look forward to.
Thinking back, she saw that her father had provided well for her. He had given her a good education, a comfortable home, and a well ordered life. Her only wish was that she might tell him thank you for that. And that she could tell him that all she ever really wanted from him was his love.
But more than anything, her mind drifted back to Buck. He had taught her so much about the life she craved in so little time. She'd been a green-horn. She knew little about mountain life. She'd never met an Indian until she came up the mountain. But looking back she realized she never felt so alive as here on this beautiful mountain.
Running Wolf came into her tipi now, and stared at her. He was so hostile looking. She admired his muscles and brawn, his clean straight featured face. "Have you reconsidered?"
"No…I'm ready to accept my fate." Rachel raised her nose an inch higher.
"You are stubborn and a fool…" He said, his face a wad of frowns. "I cannot go back and change your fate. You will die."
"Yes, I realize that. How?"
"I must think of the best way."
"Fine, let me know when you decide."
"I do not wish to kill you." He said moving closer a finger running through a small strand of her hair. His voice lowered. "I am not a harsh man. But I have chosen you, myself and you reject me in front of my people. So I must make sure you die, in front of my people, they will see how I keep my word."
"And I do not wish to die, but I will not be your wife. I refuse. I am married to another." She insisted stubbornly. "What you ask of me is beyond the white man's law. And it is the white man's law that I must obey. Not yours."
"Who have you married?" He raised his head and laughed aloud.
"I married Hershel Newton, the white man that lives on top of the mountain." She declared. "The mountain man."
The minute she mentioned Hershel, she knew he knew of him.
"But your eyes still hold innocence, why?"
"That's personal." She cried.
He pulled on her hair so that her head came back on his shoulder, and he looked down at her. "Why?"
"You're hurting me…" she cried.
"I want to know why. Your death will hurt much more than this…"
"I'm sure of that…" She huffed.
"Tell me why you have the look of an untouched woman?"
Fear speared through her as she looked into his eyes. She saw evil, and wickedness. Lack of understanding stared at her. "My husband and I were just married…there wasn't time to….." She said with a struggle. "Yet."
He let her go, then frowned. "Then your fate is decided and you will not like it."
"Tell me…" she cried. "I have the right to know."
"I will take you to my bed, but not as a bride, as a slave, as I cannot kill a virgin. And then you will die…by fire."
"That's unspeakably cruel." Rachel lashed out.
"You are a virgin, you will not be a virgin when you die. It is against the red-man's ways to kill a virgin."
"Why…why have you chosen such a harsh death for me? You have Sesari, you have the other two, and your children. Why do you seek to destroy me so?"
"Sesari is my wife. She has nothing to do with it. You are my captive. My slave. I have let you live with us, be with us. And you still spit in my eye. You marry a white man and spit in his eye, as you would not lay with him either. But the law of my people is that a virgin cannot be put to death. You will not be a virgin…"
He walked out without another word.
Rachel felt her stomach roil. She felt white hot fear snake up her back and consume her. A light sweat peppered her forehead. Her hands were shaking. She felt the tears come down her face like a river. She heard her own moans. How could she endure this?
Was he that much a barbarian? Would he dare to do something like that?
She fell down on her knees and cried. This couldn't be happening.
The other women came in now. This time they did not shun her but she could tangibly feel their pity. It took a while to control her rioting emotions. She knew she wasn't handling this news well. She knew they would not respect her weakness either.
"My husband is unusually cruel with you." Sesari said.
Rachel's face was white as a sheet as she raised her eyes to the women.
"You have defied him the pleasure of seeing your fear." Sesari said quietly.
"By all that is holy, he won't see my fear." She declared. "For what he plans to do, I cannot abide. I will fight him. I will fight him until he kills me."
"You are a strong woman. There is much to be desired in you. You are like an Indian woman, you will walk proudly to your death. And in the end, my husband will not be pleased with himself. In your death, he will realize the weakness of his own pride."
"I suppose that's some consolation." Rachel shivered.
"But you are afraid, deep down inside you are afraid. Yet you refuse him. That is good. It will teach him something. My husband is a wise man most of the time, but sometimes he is wrong. When it comes to women, he is very wrong. It is his weakness."
"I don't mind dying so much…but he plans to have me first." She cried, "And I have never been with a man…I mean…I married Hershel Newton, but we never…"
"You are a virgin?" Sesari cried out. Her face a wad of frowns and confusion. "You are married and still a virgin? How can that be? You must be lying."
"No, it's the truth! I haven't been married long…"
She spoke to the other women, and they all shrieked. "When did my husband tell you this?"
"Just now…he said because I was a virgin, he would take me and then kill me. For he wouldn't kill a virgin. It was against the tribal laws to kill a virgin."
Sesari stared at her, a tear in her eye. "It is against our customs to do such a thing, yes. But to rape you so he can kill you, I never expected that from him. He has three wives and still he hasn't enough. The three of us are family. We take care of each other. And now…we will help you…" Sesari said. "I did not expect this of my husband. I am ashamed. He shames all of us to do this. He wants to kill the pride in you."
"Help me…help me what?" She asked.
"Escape, it is the only way. He will not back down. Even if he breaks our tribal laws, he will not back down, he is too proud."
"You'd do that for me?" Rachel cried.
"For you, and for my husband, as he will disgrace himself if he does this and the elders of the tribe find out. I will not allow that disgrace."
Rachel felt a flicker of hope but she also felt a new fear. "But…what will he do to the three of you?"
Sesari rubbed her tummy and smiled vaguely. "He will do nothing, as I will go to the elders myself if he threatens us in any way. He must learn he cannot break our laws, else he will be cast in the white-man's world. He has broken against the oldest of our tribes, because he rebels. He won't live on a reservation and learn the white man's ways. But fear not, little one, we will be alright. For we all three know
of what he plans and any one of us can tell the elders."
"I do not wish you any harm." Rachel touched her arm.
Sesari looked at her with surprise shining in her eyes. "You are a strange woman. But a very good woman. We will see that you are free."
"When?" Rachel asked.
"Tomorrow night. He will not do anything until the third moon. That gives us time. You will escape into the night and never return as he will kill you on sight if you are caught."
Rachel let a tear roll down her cheek. "Oh God…thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you."
Sesari smiled, then gathered the other two women to tell them all she had heard. "You will have to travel until you can no longer travel. For he will chase you. But hide in the brush, behind rocks, anywhere that there is some cover for you. Eat berries and bugs if you have to. This will keep you alive. I am ashamed that my husband has ruled this way. But if we can save you, then he will not commit this crime. Our tribe would not stand for it."
The others didn't speak English, so she had to translate to them. When they realized what Running Wolf planned to do, they were very dismayed with him.
They both nodded to Sesari.
"Tomorrow…But you must keep a close vigil. He will expect you to act proud now and defiant. You must let him think you are resigned to your fate. Otherwise he might suspicion something."
"Yes, I can do that." Rachel agreed.
"Good." Sesari nodded sadly. "I am ashamed that my husband would do such a thing. To take you, a virgin, then to kill you by the fire. It is too much, he wouldn't do that much harm to a man. If he tries to hurt one hair on our bodies, he will be shamed from his people forever."
"I do not wish this on him, but I do not wish the fate he is arranging either." Rachel cried.
"Come, we must prepare supper and act as though we have not talked of it." Sesari led them out of the tipi.
Rachel looked up into the sky and whispered a prayer.
For the first time in her life she was sure there was a God looking over her and she felt at great peace knowing it. It gave her strength.
She did her chores, without fuss. She also took note of the tribe itself. She wanted to remember them and to learn from them too. They seemed so peaceable at first glance. But there was something hidden deep inside of them, wanting some strange revenge for the lies they were told, the treaties that were broken. Rachel could almost feel sorry for them.
She was completely silent at meal time when they gathered around him.
But it seemed like forever before bedtime. Only one more day here and then she would be free. Oh, she loved Sesari.
Chapter Sixteen
It was nearly dawn and Buck was ready to hit the trail. He made coffee for everyone, and pulled out his last stash of jerky. He shared it with them, then doused the fire.
Hershel and Little Feather packed their gear once more.
Hershel looked at his friend. "If we don't find her soon, we'll have to head back, we are nearly out of supplies."
Buck grimaced. He didn't want to quit. He knew Rach was out there somewhere, and he aimed to find her. He knew she was probably scared out of her mind too, and that didn't set well with him at all.
"You two can go back any time. I'm pushing on."
Hershel studied his friend, and shook his head. "I was right, you do have feelings for this girl."
"I just know her. She's not the kind to give up easily." Buck said glancing at his friend. "I'm going to find her Hershel."
Hershel was quiet for a moment, then he nodded. The forest was quiet this morning, almost as if it were expecting some kind of trouble. "You know, when you first started in about me getting married. I sure was irritated about it. I saw no need for a woman. But…I was wrong. And so were you. Rachel wasn't for me, Buck. She was for you. She always has been. It was your words that brought her out here. Think on that a bit."
"I know, that's why I have to find her. I'm responsible." Buck acknowledged.
"That might be true, but that's not why you are looking for her. You're in love with her. Any fool could see that." Hershel blasted.
Buck glared at Hershel.
"You know since you hooked up with Little Feather, you've got some fool notions." Buck needed to get a grip on his emotions.
"Fool or not, I'm right. I know you, partner. I see the way you look at her. And I'd say from the looks of her, she's pretty fond of you too. Ain't no shame in falling in love Buck."
"She was supposed to be your wife, not mine." Buck reminded him. "She is your wife, until that is fixed I'll not interfere."
"Why do you deny what's in your heart little buddy?" Hershel asked, his eyes widening.
"'Cause it's not how it's supposed to be. I wrote those letter for you. She married you by proxy, that might not seem like much to you, but I stood there in front of that preacher and took those vows for you."
"Yeah, I believe you did. But not for me, for yourself. You married that girl, and you know it. But you've been with her a while now and you've got feelings for her. I can see it plain as day. Look, I got my lady, right here." Hershel pet Little Feather's head. "I'm happy and I want you to be happy so if you have feelings for this little gal, maybe you should tell her."
"I think we better get a move on," Buck growled. "This isn't the time to talk of this."
"You're right. If we are going, then let's do it."
As they picked up the trail, they weaved their way through the thick forest. Some of the trees were nearly falling down because of the weight of the snow and ice.
They crawled over the dead branches. But they tried to be quiet about it. Indians had good hearing.
Then they heard something. Hershel motioned to Buck. "We've found them…"
Buck stared through the forest into the clearing and there he spotted the tipis and smelled the smoke from their fires.
He glanced at Hershel. "You got any ideas?"
"Let's watch for a while. We need to know where they are keeping her."
Buck nodded.
"I got an idea. Little Feather you got to know that I'm only gonna do this because they will probably kill her sooner or later. But I'll just march in there and tell them I'm her husband. By rights, they shouldn't kill me. But we'll have to tackle them if they do. Might be I'd only have to fight one. I could handle that. Do you understand?"
"I don't think that will work, Hershel." Buck shook his head.
"Why not?"
"Because they are Indian and they don't care if you married her."
"I could go. They might listen to me." Little Feather offered.
"No…that's out of the question." Hershel insisted.
"Then let's all go…"
"Agreed." Hershel nodded. "After we find out where she is, we'll all go in."
Buck stared at their campsite. They sat themselves on the forest floor and stared through the bushes at the encampment.
It was hours before they saw Rachel come out of the tipi. She looked tired, frustrated and a tad scared.
Running Wolf stopped her, grabbing her arms. He jerked her about.
Buck bristled.
"Not yet little buddy."
"Are you ready to face your fate?" Running Wolf asked her as she glared at him.
"Am I given any time to prepare?" She asked pulling away from him.
"Until tomorrow night, then I will take you. It will be a savage coming together, and I will find no pleasure in it." He frowned. "But it must be done. You have refused your husband, and now me. You dishonor us."
"I did not dishonor my husband. There simply wasn't time."
"A marriage without the coming together, is no marriage."
"We were traveling, it was not possible. I took vows, and I meant them. But you don't understand. While I was traveling up the mountain to see him, he was marrying another, an Indian girl."
"So…he has two wives?"
"For now, yes. But I will have it annulled, so he will only have one."
"I
t does not matter. I know nothing of this annulment you speak of. You are still a virgin, and as such I cannot condemn you to your death. But if you are not a virgin, then I can. I will take no pleasure in taking you…."
"Why? You have three beautiful wives, and many children. Why would you shame them so."
"Because of the laws of my people. Because you fight me, and disgrace me. Now I disgrace you." He said and walked off.
She stared after him her face full of real fear now.
Buck saw her face, as Running Wolf walked away, she looked white as a cloud billowing in the sky. He hadn't heard the conversation, but it must have been powerful because he had surely put the fear of God in her.
"We gotta go now." Buck insisted. Seeing Rachel again made his heart lurch and he knew Hershel was right. He did love her. But he couldn't tell her. She'd go home and marry someone there and be happy. And safe.
"At least she's alive." Hershel nodded.
They put down their guns and entered the camp.
It didn't take long for a crowd to gather around them as they marched into the center of the encampment. Indians surrounded them on every side, and had their bows drawn.
Braves stood at the ready with their bows aimed.
A stout Indian with an iron face came to stand in front of them. He was dressed in feathers and buckskin. His clothes had many beads, as though he should stand out among them. "What do you want…mountain man?" He addressed Hershel and shot Buck an evil glance.
"We came to get my wife." Hershel insisted. His tone was steady and forceful.
"We have no wife."
"You have a white captive, she is mine by law and I came to claim her." Hershel announced.
The Indian grunted and said something to another.
Before long Running Wolf stood before them. He was as tall as Hershel, but Hershel outweighed him by nearly a hundred pounds.
He eyed them with precision. Hershel stood tall and strong, Buck stood beside him. Little Feather stood off to the side.
Brides of the West-Part One Page 34
