Layers Off (Layers Trilogy)

by Silks, Lacey

  I knew what he was referring to, and honestly, despite a lurking panic attack, I’d managed to control my anxiety. Yes, the memories of my torture were still there, but now that I’d been undergoing therapy, at least I could handle them.

  “Yeah, I’m okay. What about Pucker?”

  “He’s with Emma. Let’s get out of here.” He kissed my head.

  “Tristan, we need to call the police,” Allie argued.

  “This is beyond the police, Allie.”

  “Then someone better have a good explanation for this,” Laura mumbled under her breath. I was afraid I didn’t really want to hear their reasoning for sneaking around in a casino, with hundreds of cameras everywhere. But if I knew Julian and Tristan, those were already jammed, and the brothers had a plan to get us out of here without being noticed. The red light on the camera was turned off, I noted.

  Julian grasped my hand, opened the door, peeked around in each direction, and motioned me to follow him. His entire demeanor changed, reminding me of the time he and Tristan led me through the upper corridor on the train. To my surprise the hallway was empty – the two guards who had stood there earlier were simply gone. Whatever disappearing powder the Cross brothers carried with them, I wanted some too.

  He placed his finger to his lips and turned to a staircase. The Scooby gang could walk down the middle aisle during mass and go unnoticed. Everyone followed Julian up four floors before we heard noises in the stairwell from above us and from below. The echo of drumming feet approached from both directions. My head whipped from looking up and down, my heart raced, and I felt like I belonged on a farm in Oz next to the Scarecrow. Following the men’s lead, Allie and Laura both appeared calm. Sam, on the other hand, had the same fear-stricken face I imagined I did. Threats and danger had never touched my nerves so deeply before I’d been kidnapped, but now, after having been held against my will and knowing what could happen – the mere thought was enough to practically release my bladder.

  “We need to split,” Gabe whispered.

  “Stay safe,” Julian murmured to his brother, as Gabe and James bumped fists.

  Tristan kissed Allie and scooted up the stairs, Gabe and Sam ran one flight down with James and Laura, while Julian pulled on my hand and we turned into a hallway on the floor we stood.

  “What now?” I whispered, waiting for Donato to burst through the door at the other end of the hall.

  “We have a room booked at the other end of the hall.” I’d never seen a man run on his tiptoes, but Julian did. It reminded me of a scene when Fred Flintstone went bowling.

  We reached the mid-point of the L-shaped hotel when a security guard opened the staircase door through which we’d just left. We scooted behind the corner just in time, but the other end of the hall was beginning to open as well.

  We were stuck.

  At the same time, the door knob of a hotel room beside us turned and I pushed through pulling Julian in with me, and then quietly locked the door.

  “Kendra?” the man asked. “What are you doing here?”

  Thank God I’d been sitting close to Laura while she gambled, because some of her luck had definitely rubbed off on me. Apparently we’d run right into Sean’s room.

  “You know this guy?” Julian’s tone held a hint of jealousy I couldn’t deal with now.

  “Yes. Sean, this is my boyfriend, Julian. Julian, Sean. The security’s chasing us. They’re trying to hold us against our will and without a lawyer. They refused when we asked to call the police. Please let us hide here until they’re gone.”

  Julian’s brows rose, but of course Sean’s attention was completely on me.

  “Of course. Are you in some kind of trouble? Do you need a lawyer?”

  “This is beyond the law for now,” Julian answered. “If we want a chance at any kind of fairness, we need to get back to New York first. I have a room we need to get to at the end of the hall.”

  “If they find us... Sean, please trust me. We’re the good guys.”

  I was sure that any way I tried to explain murdering someone would sound wrong to him. It was better to leave out the details. Julian’s arm tightened around me as Sean considered what I’d said for a moment.

  “Stay here; I’ll see if they’re gone.” Our host left his hotel room.

  “How well do you know him?” Julian whispered when the doors closed.

  “I bumped into him on the casino floor. He spilled his chips and was very kind. I knew he’d help us because he sort of liked me.” I felt my cheeks heat.

  A rumble vibrated in Julian’s chest as if he’d growled from deep inside.

  “He’s s a genuine man. That’s all,” I assured him.

  Someone cleared his throat from the outside hall.

  “We’re looking for these people. Have you seen them?” I recognized Peter Donato’s voice.

  “Yes, yes I have,” Sean answered.

  I felt my jaw drop and eyes widen to probably double their size. Julian’s jaw tightened as he put his hand on the doorknob, waiting for the guard to break down the door. His lips formed a perfectly straight line.

  “A few minutes ago before I got off on my floor. I was coming up to get my credit card. They were in the elevator and pressed the parking button.”

  I exhaled and Julian let go of the doorknob.

  “Thank you sir,” Peter said. I assumed he then communicated through his walkie-talkie. “They’re heading for the garage. All units, to the garage.”

  A few seconds later, Sean came back inside. “It’s clear. You can go.”

  “Thank you, Sean. I really owe you big time.”

  Julian handed him a business card, “If you ever need anything, please don’t hesitate.”

  “I can tell you’re sincere. And I hope whatever troubles are following you, you’ll be able to put them to rest soon.”

  With that Julian guided me out and to the end of the hall toward the room he’d mentioned.

  He squeezed my hand, saying, “I wanted to do this differently, but we don’t have a choice anymore. Please forgive me.” His eyes held apprehension as he slid a key card through the slot of one of the rooms.

  The door swung open. At first I could only see bright light behind two darker silhouettes. And then I stood there with my mouth open, feeling my soul leave my body for a moment and then return in confusion. How could this be? I didn’t even notice when we entered the room and only felt being nudged inside, toward the two people waiting for us.

  I hoped I wasn’t dead, just like I thought my parents were – because they stood right there, in front of me, alive and in the flesh.

  CHAPTER 20

  My mother’s trembles vibrated through my body. My father held his arm around her from behind. I noted his fingers holding the fabric at her waist, as if he was holding onto reality itself. They both had new wrinkles, ones I’d missed watching blend into their faces, so seeing them now, older, made this so unreal. Her eyes were the same, though, caring and filled with hope. Despite my mom’s strict rules, I could always count on her to defend me and protect me, like any mother should. A memory flashed through my mind so quickly, I wondered whether it was real. She was on the phone, yelling at someone. I’d never heard her cuss as much as she did that day. It was at a shooting practice. Her voice was loud enough for me to hear from under my head muffs.

  “...touch her...bastard...kill...”

  And then the memory was gone.

  My focus turned to my father. His eyes held that determination and resilience I loved. It was where I’d found my strength to stand up for myself. He bought me my first rifle and taught me how to be responsible with the weapons. I was ten – always checking the safety locks and letting my father store them in our basement safe. This was a new memory too.

  Tears streaked down my mother’s face, but she didn’t say a word and she didn’t move. I imagined she couldn’t, because I too seemed to be stuck as if cemented to the spot, yet my knees knocked against each other. Were we in the middl
e of an earthquake? It felt as if the walls around me would soon collapse and the floor would swallow me whole. My throat tightened further and I found it difficult to breathe. The short breaths into my lungs felt like little wheezes. I knew the room would spin soon. I wasn’t getting enough oxygen to my brain.

  The door shut behind me, and my airways opened up for a longer suck of air. Some whispers resonated from the end of the room, where the rest of the party was already sitting on a couch.

  Someone handed me a bottle of water. The liquid passed through my throat like a river through a desert.

  “Is this a joke?” I asked no one in particular. What else was I supposed to say? These people in front of me had to be impersonators, didn’t they? To test whether I could deal with stress, right? Why else would they have been hired? Although these questions coursed through me as I searched for answers, I already knew the truth. I think I’d always known. I mourned them after the train accident, but it had never really soaked through me that they were gone. I blamed it on the fact that it was a closed casket ceremony and I couldn’t see the bodies – or whatever remains were found after the accident, which I was sure at the time couldn’t have been a lot. There weren’t a lot of people there, which made sense since I was supposed to disappear as well.

  “Katherine, it’s us.” My mother spoke first.

  “Kendra. My name is Kendra.”

  “Kendra, I know you have a lot of questions,” she continued.

  Not really a lot; I only had one: “Why?”

  My mother paced toward me with caution, visibly shaking. I was sure she’d taken Valium or Xanax. There was no other way she’d be able to stand right now. Part of me wished for drugs at this moment. Something to numb me. A drink, at least – tequila straight up always helped.

  Oh God! I realized I hadn’t recovered as much as I thought I had. Maybe I couldn’t go back to Kissed yet. A chair had been left behind me, but I didn’t think my knees could bend to sit. I still seemed to be locked in that one spot, where I wasn’t sure what was real.

  And then she took me into her arms, the way she had when I was a little girl. She held me against her body, squeezing me as if she hadn’t seen me for a century, not a decade. Although it did feel like a century. Her motherly warmth oozed from her soul into my body, and I collapsed into her arms, closing my fists around the back of her shirt and sobbing. So much had happened and so much had changed. I had changed. I’d been a girl the last time I saw them. Now I was a woman who’d visited hell more than once. But her comfort that I’d been denied slowly spread through me. The guiding touch I’d missed mellowed the stone walls of my heart. I held on tight, afraid if I let go I’d wake up and she’d be gone in a puff of smoke. No, this couldn’t happen. I wouldn’t let go, I couldn’t lose them again.

  Like a professional mother, she eased her arms from around me, saying, “We missed you and thought about you every day.”

  I finally sat down on the chair behind me, watching my father drift closer like a ghost. He’d aged beyond his external appearance, and so had my mother. The deepened wrinkles under their eyes represented much more than time. My dad’s sparse gray hair had turned to a full head of silver. My mother’s appeared dried and not as clean-cut as she’d always worn it. Had they been to hell as well?

  The door opened behind me, but I had no strength to turn around.

  “We had no choice, Ka... ...Kendra,” he said. “We did this for you.”

  “I think she needs a while longer,” Julian said. “Kendra, we can wait until we get home. Are you all right?”

  “You knew. This whole time you knew they were alive,” I said to him, but didn’t really need an answer.

  “It wasn’t only Julian, K. I and our father knew as well. We were under a contract. Your life was at stake, and so we couldn’t take the chance of its terms being broken,” Tristan said from the corner of the room, slowly stepping closer.

  I was a contract?

  “Why? Somebody please explain why?” My gaze darted from my parents to Tristan, Gabe, and Julian. Then back to my parents again.

  “We had no choice, darling. Our only choice was to disappear.”

  “Five minutes,” someone called from near the window. I noticed Gabe was looking through a pair of binoculars. Was he in on this too? He was my best friend’s husband, an ex-partner in Kissed, and someone so level-headed I’d always trusted him beyond reasonable doubt.

  No, Gabe couldn’t have known about this.

  I thought back to my father’s career, about his rooted connections in Congress, and wondered what could have happened to force him to leave it all behind. What did he do or overhear that would condemn them to a future of constant hiding? Which was what I assumed they had done over the past decade.

  My second long thoughts felt like minutes. So much was running through my mind I found it difficult to concentrate on the facts. The air tightened in my lungs and I realized I was holding my breath. If I couldn’t focus, I’d be in trouble. I’d return to my old ways. Why the fuck would they spring this on me now? When I just thought I’d recovered, this could put me so far back, I wasn’t sure I’d want to return. Not this time.

  “Without me? You disappeared without me.”

  “You were so young, K.” My mother’s eyes glistened.

  “You had a whole future ahead of you. We didn’t want to take that away from you.”

  “That’s why I had the new identity?”

  The Cross family assured me that, going into witness protection. They would clean up the paper trail and keep me hidden from my parent’s enemies. I’d always thought it was someone in Congress who had it bad for my dad. Was it Donato’s father, the owner of this casino they’d mentioned?

  “Yes,” they replied at the same time.

  “It was the only way to guarantee you a fresh start,” Julian added.

  “You could have taken me with you,” I said to my parents.

  My mother crouched in front of my chair. Her wrinkled hands had new age spots I’d missed watching appear. She brought them to my knees, and I was surprised by how good they felt there.

  “No, baby. We couldn’t. We’ve been completely off the grid until now.”

  “And what changed?”

  “We received information threatening your future. You hold devastating secrets, K.”

  “Three minutes,” Gabe said in a lower whisper.

  My friends huddled in a corner conducted a quiet conversation. Were they being filled in on my past? Were they wondering what would happen next? Whether someone would barge into this room and cuff us all? Maybe throw us into a dungeon? The thought cut through me like fresh razor blades.

  My head ached. I wasn’t sure whether I could hear my parents’ explanations, let alone comprehend their reasoning for walking out on me. That was basically what had happened, wasn’t it? I couldn’t imagine there ever being a reason big enough for a parent to leave a child, not willingly. But after so many years, here they were, alive. The man whom I loved and trusted had been lying to me since the day I met him. And Donato’s son was accusing me of a murder I didn’t commit – or at least didn’t remember committing.

  “The train accident – was that a setup?”

  “Yes,” my father said.

  I turned to Julian. “You knew this was going to happen to me that day, didn’t you?”

  “Yes, but we were hoping for a quicker resolution. It was supposed to be a couple of months. We prayed it wouldn’t take this long to sort everything, but it did.”

  “Years,” I said in a monotone. Despite another gulp of water, I still couldn’t get much through my throat.

  “One minute,” Gabe declared. The sound of bodies shuffling around livened the room as everyone seemed to be making their way toward the door.

  “We couldn’t take you because we didn’t want you to live in constant fear, not like that. You were so young. Ka... Kendra, it was either disappear and give you a chance at a normal life, or watch you go to prison.
”

  Yet I never remembered a threat of prison time when my parents were alive. My childhood had always been comfortable – one filled with a ton of security guards, but nonetheless comfortable. My father’s last comment struck me deep, quite a few seconds later than it should have.

  “Why would I go to prison?”

  “Because you killed Mr. Donato, your high school teacher.”

  CHAPTER 21

  “It’s time.” Gabe led the way to the front door, opening it without a hesitation.

  I followed Julian’s guiding arm toward the elevators. There were lots of whispers behind me, including: this is our only chance, rooftop, Donato, hiding.

  The words sort of blended into a conversation I’d made up in my mind all by myself. I drew on the most important points. At that last one, I said, “No, no one’s going into hiding.” I wasn’t too sure who I was talking to, but I knew that whatever would happen from this point on, I wanted the truth, and I wanted to face the consequences. If I had murdered Donato, I had to pay for it. Still, I didn’t remember when or how I killed him. I’d had nightmares of shooting someone, but they were never clear.

  “I don’t remember. How do I not remember killing someone?”

  But no one answered. The elevator dinged, opened, and soon gravity pulled me to the floor. The small compartment full of people I had trusted, who had lied to me for so many years, ascended. Okay, maybe ‘lie’ was too strong a word. No, no it wasn’t. As much as I wanted to convince myself they’d kept the truth hidden for my own good, it was a lie. My life had been a big, fat lie. Was that why I’d been so screwed up all the time? Why I made the wrong choices in life and turned to drugs and alcohol? Because I was surrounded by professional liars?

  No, I can’t blame them for my mistakes.

  “We know you don’t remember what happened. You’ve been hypnotized not to,” my mother confirmed.

  “K, if you had gone with your parents and kept Katherine’s life, you’d most likely have ended up in prison. Your parents wanted you to have a chance at life. Witness protection is different from being on the run. Your father was well known; chances were he’d be found if they didn’t go off the grid. And it’d be difficult to do so with a teenage daughter who’d be robbed of education and... well, life. Donato’s father was and still is in Congress. He’s been looking for the kil... for evidence to find you. That’s why you got a new identity.”