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Diary of a Snoopy Cat

Page 5

by R. F. Kristi


  But the whole purpose would be lost as he surely would take the paper and disappear out of the house or destroy it.

  Our one and only chance would be lost forever.

  Should I leave the room now and come back with Monk who was much stronger?

  Hmmm…. that would take the case right out of my own hands.

  I am ashamed to admit that I really wished to crack this case by myself.

  After all the team had named our Detective Agency after me.

  I couldn’t let the side down.

  The sheer desperation of the situation made me use all my strength.

  I latched my nails onto the binder of the book.

  I pulled with all my might.

  THUD!

  The book crashed to the ground with a THUMP.

  The folded paper floated down and rested on the floor.

  PHEW!!!

  What a relief!!!

  I bent down to take a look at the paper.

  Yep, it was the WILL.

  Suddenly!

  CRASH!!!

  The door burst open and the Stinky Porkster stood at the door…

  My heart stood still!

  I looked at the Stinky Porkster in horror!

  The sight of me bending over the will had turned him into a mad demon.

  THIEF! THIEF!

  He yelled!

  His face had turned purple. He looked not only like a mad demon but a mad demon about to have a fit.

  I shuddered, the fur on my neck standing on end.

  Cyril the Porkster had turned into a purple monster and a demon combined in one horrid fat body.

  For a second, I couldn’t move as I was terrified! I stood glued to the floor!

  All my bravado disappeared in a jiffy.

  I pulled myself out of my state of terror.

  It’s ‘now or never’ I thought to myself desperately.

  I had to make a run for it.

  I grabbed the paper in my mouth and leaped to the window.

  But I had not anticipated the nasty rain.

  The blast of stormy rain gave me a rude shock.

  I nearly let out a loud meow in my surprise at the cold wet rain.

  Just in time, I remembered the valuable paper I carried and clamped it tighter in my mouth.

  My hesitation at the window had given the Stinky Porkster time to move.

  I heard the Stinky Porkster’s loud voice utter a snarl and his hot stinky breath pour over me.

  “Got you” he said as his fat fist reached out and grabbed me.

  The Stinky Porkster yanked me to the ground and held me down.

  I struggled with all my might but I couldn’t wriggle free.

  My heart beat wildly:

  Bang! Boom! Bang!

  What a disaster!!!

  What would he do?

  Would this be the end of my wonderful short life?

  Would he crush me under his big fat feet??

  Would he rip my head off???

  Would he chew me up like a chocolate????

  Would he swallow me whole like a marshmallow?????

  Would I end up turning into a snack for this ugly purple monster??????

  How did I get myself into this pickle?

  Just then Boss came charging into the room barking very, very loudly.

  “WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!

  The Stinky Porkster was distracted by Boss’s hurried and noisy dash into the room.

  This made him lose his grip and I managed to wriggle out of his grasp.

  I guess he expected Boss to catch me and rip me to pieces.

  The Stinky Porkster was well aware of Boss’s reputation for destroying kitties.

  “Catch her Boss!”

  Yelled the Stinky Porkster, making the glass windows rattle at the loud roar of his voice.

  Boss winked at me whilst snarling. Taking that as a sign of encouragement, I leaped out of the window using all my strength.

  My famous talent for leaping came into good use.

  I landed on the tree and clutched on to the branch for dear life.

  The rain had turned the branches wet and slippery. My paws were damp and I felt myself sliding down the trunk.

  I dug my claws deeper into the slippery trunk and continued to climb down in spite of being worried that I would slip and fall.

  I slithered to the ground and hid under a shrub.

  I stayed as still as I could, panting with the force of my descent.

  I was safe for the moment but I was shivering from the cold.

  The will, a single paper, was not heavy. Thankfully, it was folded and I could hold it firmly in my mouth.

  Another worry - I was more nervous that the paper would turn into a soggy mess due to the water from the rain.

  I heard a commotion in the background and a loud voice shouting,

  “Boss, after that cat!”

  I forced myself to move from the safety of the shrub that protected me from the rain and raced for the wall.

  I felt Boss’s large paws coming after me, but rather slowly.

  I guessed Boss was pretending to come after me but was actually running at a slower pace to give me a chance to escape.

  Good old Boss!

  Without thinking twice, I raced to the shrubbery by the wall and climbed it, forgetting the cold and my shivering body.

  I raced back home.

  Thursday Evening:

  I was ever so happy to be back in our warm and cozy cottage.

  I put down the document on our dining table where Mom would surely not miss seeing it.

  I sat down panting.

  I excitedly blabbed the story out to Cara who looked at me with awe.

  “Inca, you are so brave,” she said.

  “Cara, quick run and go fetch Monk,” I said. “I don’t wish to leave this paper alone for one minute.”

  While waiting for Monk, I carefully opened the folded paper. Despite the dampness the writing was clear.

  Here was the will, signed in the shaky but legible writing of old Mr. Finchley, gifting his house to Ned!!

  It was countersigned with two other signatures and stamped.

  I had done it!

  I had achieved my dream of solving the case by myself.

  I had become a detective par excellence!

  “Well done!” said Monk as he padded in with Polo and Cara.

  “The important thing is to tell Mom that she should protect this paper and call Ned pronto,” I said through chattering teeth.

  Despite my shivers, I couldn’t help but be proud.

  But I restrained myself from bragging.

  In any case, my chattering teeth prevented me from doing so.

  “I wish Solo was here,” said Monk.

  He was silent for a minute and then said:

  “Inca can you get Mom to call Inspector Reid? He will know what to do about this. Yes, he will be a match for the Stinky Porkster.”

  Monk was correct.

  No way did I want Mom to deal with someone like the Stinky Porkster alone.

  “You are right, Monk,” I said.

  “I will do so as soon as she comes in from the store with Fromage. In the meantime, Cara and I will guard the will and see that it doesn’t get in harm’s way.

  “Without this precious paper, Ned would be on the streets and Boss would be left to live with the Stinky Porkster.

  “We cannot allow that. Despite how Boss has behaved in the past, he was now our client, and we must do our best for him.”

  “I think Boss has learnt his lesson,” said Polo.

  “He feels sorry for his past behavior and has nothing but admiration for you. I know he will keep to his promise. I am sure he will no longer bother kitties. No fear of that. Boss has his faults, but he is a doggie who keeps to his word.”

  “He was a great help in me getting away from the Stinky Porkster,” I said in agreement.

  No sooner had I uttered these words that we saw a strange ugly face looking in through the wind
ow.

  Narrow slits for eyes, short stubble on his head, with a really ugly mug! He was staring at us with a menacing sneer on his face.

  “Who is that?” I yowled nearly falling off the table.

  “It’s Rolf!” yapped Polo in excitement and fear as he recognized the nasty face peering at us.

  The Stinky Porkster seemed to have sent Rolf after us instead of coming himself.

  We looked at each other in alarm.

  Where were our friendly humans when we needed them?

  I began to have second thoughts about this whole adventure.

  As much as I loved detective work, I didn’t wish any of my furry family or friends to get hurt.

  Rolf looked like a NASTY piece of work.

  “Quick, quick, let’s hide the will before he gets in,” yelled Monk.

  We heard him at the door fiddling with the lock.

  Luckily the door was locked!

  “He will be able to open the door with a false key. I have seen this done many times before by Solo and Hobbs,” yowled Monk.

  “Let’s move it.”

  “HURRY! HURRY!

  “I will take the will and go out through the window,” shouted Monk.

  “Hold on Monk!” I yelled.

  “He will only come after you. He looks like a tough and fit guy. I know what to do, trust me.

  “You just try to distract him.”

  While the door burst open, my friends charged at Rolf courageously, even my timid sis Cara.

  I grabbed the will in my mouth and headed off to the attic, closely followed by Charlotte.

  Charlotte had guessed what I had in mind.

  We were heading to a place that Rolf would never be able to get to. Our playing field – the attic.

  The attic was Charlotte’s home and the spot we played our favorite game - Gangsters Verses Cops.

  Our home was a proper cottage. There was an attic just below the thatched roof.

  This space was awkwardly shaped and a human would find it difficult to walk upright in it.

  Mom had reserved the attic as a playpen for her four-footed furry family.

  As we left, I saw Monk landing on Rolf’s shoulder digging his sharp claws into him.

  No light weight was our pal Monk, I can assure you.

  Rolf let out a shrill yell of surprise as Polo nipped his ankles with his sharp teeth and Cara hissed at him with all her might.

  Looking at Rolf, I knew they couldn’t stop him. But it did give Charlotte and me time to run up to the attic.

  Charlotte gave a frightened squeak when we saw Rolf’s angry face looming behind us with our team behind him.

  Monk, noticing that I was a few feet from the landing to the attic, launched himself once again onto Rolf’s back.

  Rolf lost his step and went crashing down the stairs with this sudden weight on him.

  I saw Monk had landed safely on his feet, as we kitties always do.

  He jumped on Rolf once again.

  With another burst of energy, I raced into the attic with Charlotte scurrying behind me.

  “Over here,” panted Charlotte and led me to a far corner where she had made a comfy nest.

  She took the will in her teeny paws and pushed it deep inside.

  Only she could enter this tiny space. Not even we could enter her private space as it was so small.

  I was fairly sure that Rolf would not be able to get inside the attic.

  Even if he crawled on his belly, he would not be able to reach into Charlotte’s nest.

  “Stay hidden with the paper, Charlotte,” I said as we saw Rolf trying to squeeze himself into the attic.

  I went forward, hissing angrily, though my heart was pounding with fear.

  Rolf looked a nasty sullen character and I did not look forward to battling with him.

  One thing though, he had a nasal voice which made his curses seem silly.

  But his voice was the only thing silly about him.

  In every other way, he was a huge, ugly, revolting man.

  Rolf tried to crawl further into the room. His nasty, stinky breath made us want to puke.

  UGH!!!

  Just then we heard the sound of Mom’s bicycle coming up the drive.

  I sighed with relief.

  For sure, Rolf did not want to get caught inside Mom’s house, uninvited.

  Muttering a low curse in his silly voice, Rolf crawled back out and ran down the stairs.

  He leaped out of the window as Mom’s key turned in the lock.

  We collapsed in relief.

  Rolf’s role in the mystery soon became evident.

  He was the Stinky Porkster’s henchman.

  He had planned to get a big fat bribe once the house became the Stinky Porkster’s.

  I recovered the paper from Charlotte and sped down the stairs.

  Mom came in with Fromage. She wheeled her bicycle under the protection of the porch and Fromage jumped down from the basket that he rides in.

  Monk and Polo left me to deal with Mom and quickly ran out through the back-door cat flap.

  When Mom and Fromage came in, Cara and I were sitting solemnly in front of the paper on the dining table.

  “Hello My little poppets! Why the long faces?” said Mom.

  “Why aren’t you running to greet me?

  “What’s going on?” added Mom when she noticed us crouching over the Will.

  Leaving Cara to explain to Fromage about what had happened, I jumped into Mom’s arms.

  I put my forepaws on her shoulders and looked deep into her eyes.

  I started passing my thoughts to her in deep waves, explaining the need to call Inspector Reid and hand over the will urgently to him to save Ned from losing his house.

  My telepathic powers were as strong as ever.

  Mom of course understood. She picked up the will and read it without saying a word.

  “How you managed to get a hold of this will is a wonder. I need to call Inspector Reid right away” she said.

  Mom knew Ned. They often met while jogging in the park. Ned had told her about him having to leave his home.

  Mom lifted the phone and called Inspector Reid. She explained excitedly about what was going on. Inspector Reid promised to come immediately.

  Between you and me, I believed Inspector Reid had a crush on Mom.

  I’d noticed how he hung on every word she said and simpered like an idiot whenever she was around.

  True to his word, Inspector Reid knocked on our door soon after.

  He looked over our cozy sitting room. He eagerly accepted Mom’s offer of hot chocolate which he sipped while listening to Mom.

  Inspector Reid, like his friend Solo, was tall and lanky but with sandy brown hair unlike Solo’s mop of black hair.

  Monk claimed that Inspector Reid was a decent bloke even though he rarely smiled. However, Monk had to admit that after the Inspector met my family, particularly Mom, he was a changed person.

  “You did very well calling me, Missy,” he said and blushed when Mom expressed her thanks for him coming so quickly.

  He studied the will carefully.

  “Somehow, I suspect your kitties had something to do with this will,” he said as he looked at the three of us.

  We blinked at him, and then ignored him, each of us busy in our own way.

  Fromage settled down before the fire.

  Cara settled down on Mom’s lap, glowering at the good Inspector.

  I settled behind Mom’s head, sniffing her fresh scented hair. She could then lean back and give me a quick stroke when she felt my breath on her neck.

  Inspector Reid reluctantly got to his feet and held Mom’s hands while saying his goodbyes.

  “Is he ever going to let go of her hands?” muttered Cara crossly.

  Cara is possessive of Mom.

  “Come on Cara,” I said. “He’s just being friendly. He’s is helping us after all.”

  In response, Cara scowled some more at Inspector Reid.
r />   The good inspector had no idea about Cara’s possessive jealousy. He promised Mom that he would deal with the will.

  He had heard rumors of the Stinky Porkster asking Ned to leave his home. He assured Mom that he would make sure that Ned became the lawful owner of the house.

  It would be the Stinky Porkster who would have to leave the house unless Ned agreed to let him stay on.

  Inspector Reid couldn’t understand why the Stinky Porkster wanted Ned’s home when he already had an expensive apartment.

  It was a well-known fact that the Stinky Porkster had inherited a great deal from his uncle, Mr. Finchley.

  “Money is the root of all evil,” replied Mom.

  “For some people, life revolves around money and greed overcomes good sense.

  “I am so glad for Ned. It would have been a terrible blow to him to leave his home and Boss,” said Mom.

  Mom loved to preach.

  She was right of course. She knows her stuff, does our Mom.

  I was thrilled with the outcome of the case and knew that Boss would be beside himself with joy, as would Ned.

  We would get Boss’s reaction from Polo when they met in the park. Polo would explain in more detail how the team attacked Rolf and what Charlotte and I had done to save the will.

  Everyone would know of the role I had played in getting back the will.

  I was counting on this story spreading like wild-fire amongst the animal kingdom.

  I had done it! Yes, I had become a Detective Cat Par Excellence!

  7 Days Before Christmas

  Friday Morning:

  “It’s time to put up our Christmas tree. I am going out to buy a Christmas tree for us to decorate,” announced Mom.

  We loved helping Mom hang up decorations on the tree.

  She was soon back with a large tree that was carried by the corner shop owner, Mr. Rajput, who sported a large turban on his head.

  Mom pulled out the box of Christmas decorations that she carefully safeguarded each January when the tree was taken down.

  “Go call Monk to spend the evening with us,” I whispered to Fromage.

  “Decorating the Christmas tree is such fun. It will take his mind off missing his family.”

  So off ran Fromage and returned soon with Monk.

  Mom noticed that Monk was amongst us. She remembered that Hobbs was not around and she opened an extra tin of food for Monk.

 

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