Beautiful Collision

by Tori Alvarez

  “At least I’m reading something, not watching,” I jab back, knowing he’s just giving me crap.

  “How much longer?” He nods his head to the recruits.

  I look at the time and realize our two hours are five minutes away. “Five.”

  “They can handle the last five. Come on.” He stands back up and begins walking out.

  I follow him into the back den and shut the door behind me.

  He sits on one of the sofas, and I take a chair.

  “What’s up?” I ask, wondering why he needs the secrecy back here.

  He looks down at his hands clasped together. “Need a drink?” He makes his way to the bar and pours himself a whiskey clean.

  Must be something heavy, so I agree to one too. He hands me a glass and proceeds to sit again.

  “Are you going to spit it out or not?” His cryptic attitude is starting to grate.

  “Are you seeing anyone?” He looks up at me quizzically.

  “Yes.” I take a sip, focusing on the burn.

  “Who?” he continues.

  “I don’t know if you know her. Toni. I met her at one of our parties.” I don’t want to share too much. He takes another drink, and I can tell he’s pondering his next statement.

  “For fuck’s sake, just spit it out.” My anger is beginning to show. Who the fuck cares who I’m seeing?

  “It seems Kevin also knows Toni.” Another sip.

  “I know. I got her number from him.” I calm myself at Kevin’s name, wanting to know what the big secret is between the two of them.

  “You did?” He seems surprised.

  “Yes. I saw them talking at one of the parties. I talked to her that night, too, but didn’t get the digits. Since I saw them talking, I decided to ask. He gave them to me.” I make it all sound as casual as possible so he will spill whatever he knows.

  “Oh…” He seems surprised. “I guess never mind.” He begins to backtrack.

  No he doesn’t. I want to know where this was going.

  “Never mind what?” I push.

  He takes the last in his glass in one large gulp. He looks nervous, which is putting me on edge, so I follow his lead and gulp the last of mine also.

  After a few breaths, he begins. “Remember the night we were at that hole-in-the-wall?”

  “Yeah.”

  “That night, after you left, Kevin began talking about her. Toni…” He pauses again, his unease with recounting the story evident.

  “And what did he say?”

  “First, he asked if you had left. When someone confirmed, he began talking about her sexual prowess.” His gaze drops to the floor, not wanting to meet my gaze.

  “Is that it?” Smoke is beginning to escape from my ears.

  “Just about. He was just calling her some pretty nasty names.”

  I’m stunned. No wonder Toni feels as she does. “Any more?” I ask, wanting to ensure I have the full story.

  “No.”

  “And these names?” I want clarification.

  Again, he pauses in discomfort. “Look, I just didn’t want you to be blindsided if someone brought it up.”

  “Thank you. And the names he called her?” I stand my ground.

  “Whore, easy, money-hungry, stripper. You know, all the names he likes to degrade women with. It’s not like she’s the first he has tried to degrade.”

  He has a point, but that he was doing it to someone I love is intolerable. Love. I love her?

  “Look, thanks for the heads up, and don’t mention you told me. No need to start shit here.” I appreciate his friendship and don’t want the house in on this crap. No need for Kevin to dig in his heels and start a rumor about her and the club on Walters he tried to make me believe.

  He looks up, relieved, as I make my way out of the house.

  Chapter 12

  Dating

  Toni

  Another fun meme makes its way to my message inbox. My hesitation about a relationship with Garrett is still a constant thought, but he is holding up his end of the bargain and letting me set the pace. Well, the sharing-of-my-life pace, because well, I can’t seem to keep my hands off of him. I have even agreed to more sleepovers. His apartment, with every modern convenience known to man, is hard to resist.

  As soon as he places his strong hands on me, I melt. That is what I now trust whole-heartedly. I trust him to take care of my body and needs. He never rushes to get me off for his own release. He takes control. And I listen. He takes his time, almost worshipping me, his soft kisses and caresses foreplay to what I can expect later.

  I’m on campus, having lunch with Lola. She is trying to convince me into another group night out bowling. While it was fun, I can’t spend that much if I’m giving up the club. I have enough tucked away for the year if I’m careful. I can’t work there while “dating” Garrett. I refuse to lie about something current. My past is only an omission, not a lie. And I won’t let Garrett spend that kind of money, either. While I assume he’s comfortable, I won’t let him support me, either.

  “We have to go bowling. It was so much fun!” Lola is pleading with me again after I have told her no twice already.

  “Why bowling?” My mind is scrambling on finding something else for her to grasp.

  “Because we aren’t just drinking. We’re interacting. It’s not some party where we are just getting shit-faced. Or a club where we can’t even talk.” I’m beginning to understand her why. She likes being with people and not just the “party” aspect of it.

  “Got it.” I put my hand up to stop her from interrupting me. “How about a game night at your place? Like Pictionary or something cheesy like that?” I don’t really know many “family games” since it wasn’t part of my childhood, but I have seen enough TV to imagine.

  “Game night!” Her eyes light up. I can tell I’m onto something.

  “Yes. And we can each bring snacks to share and whatever we’re drinking.” This will also help my budget.

  “O.M.G.” She shakes her head back and forth. “I can’t believe I hadn’t thought of that. You’re a genius. It’s set. Saturday night, game night at my place.” She quickly takes out her phone and is typing at a furious pace.

  My phone pings an incoming text a few seconds later with the group text. She has already begun inviting everyone over and coordinating the evening.

  “Now, are you going to tell me about Garrett or not?” She places her phone on the table and stares at me.

  “Tell you what?” I feign ignorance.

  “Pah-lease. You all have been together for the past couple of weeks, and you have not said anything.”

  “What do you want me to say?” I ask.

  “Well, I don’t know. How much you like him. Usual girl banter about boys. Come on. Let me live vicariously through you, because I’m still looking for someone worthwhile.” Her smile is genuine.

  “He’s sweet.”

  “Argh…I know he’s sweet. That’s not what I’m talking about. Are you all exclusive, still dating others, has he told you how he feels…” Her eyes are bright with wonder.

  “I don’t know. We haven’t really talked about that yet. It’s only been a couple of weeks.”

  “You are so avoiding this, aren’t you? I can tell. That boy is head over heels, and you have him guessing, don’t you?”

  A laugh escapes my lips with her dramatic, spot-on analysis. Well, I’m not sure he is head over heels, but I am the one keeping things as light as I can—for now.

  “Stop pressuring me,” I tell her once I get my breathing under control from the laughter. “I’ll tell you when I have something to tell.” I roll my eyes in a dramatic fashion, which has her now cackling at me.

  I think I will tell her. She has pushed her way into my life like Garrett. She insists on getting together, never taking no for an answer unless we make alternate plans. She is supportive. It amazes me how these two people came into my life at the same time.

  

  I pick up thre
e cheap, large pizzas and a bottle of vodka with mixer. All this for under forty dollars. Garrett is not pleased I am buying the things to take to Lola’s, but I insisted since he paid at the bowling alley and continues to pick up small tabs here and there. It is nowhere near equal, but at least I’m contributing.

  “Why wouldn’t you let me get the stuff?” Garrett begins again as I get in his truck from the liquor store.

  “I told you already.” I climb across the console and kiss his lips.

  I sit back down in my seat, buckling up as he begins reversing. “You thought that shut me up.” He looks over at me, smirking.

  “Didn’t it?” I glare at him teasingly.

  “Nope. It’s not happening next time. I’m paying or buying next time.” I roll my eyes at him. We’ll fight about that when the time comes. I’m not using him for his money. He’s not a client or customer, so I can’t let him pay.

  We get to Lola’s before everyone else as I promised her I would help set up. She has purchased a dry-erase board for the evening, and Garrett has brought some card game they all seemed excited to play based on the text reactions.

  “I don’t have enough seating, but pillows on the floor are okay, right?” She has a sofa and a chair for four, and there will be six or seven of us.

  “Lola, stop stressing. We are all here to have fun. And if it makes you feel better, Garrett and I will sit on the floor pillows.”

  “Speak for yourself, woman. I’m taking the chair.” Garrett throws himself into the chair dramatically.

  “Stop teasing her. Look at the girl.” I point at Lola placing bowls of chips and dips on her table.

  “Lola. Really. It’s fine,” Garrett chimes in to try and help. “Why are you so worked up anyway? It’s a casual night out.”

  He seems as curious as I am about why she’s acting like she is expecting the queen.

  She sits at one of the kitchen chairs she has pulled into a corner and sighs deeply. We wait as she gains the strength to let us in on why she is obsessing over the little things.

  “The last time I had people over was before I took my year off. And it was horrible. My ‘sisters’”—she air quotes with her fingers—“bashed the dinner I had at my apartment. They criticized the food, the games I brought out, what I wore…just everything. I never had anyone over after that. It’s one of the reasons I took a year off. I just didn’t want to be around them anymore.” Her shoulders slump.

  I drag a chair closer to her and sit. “You have to remember, we are not them. You have chosen who you let into your life now. We aren’t judging. We are here for food and laughs. That’s it.”

  She looks up at me and smiles. “Thanks. I just let the memory drive me crazy today. When you mentioned it, I was all in. Then today, the nerves of being criticized hit.”

  This is another reason why she has become a person to trust. She has been hurt and judged. She won’t do the same maliciously.

  “No worries,” is the only thing that comes to mind as I’m not the sentimental type. “Now, chill out. Everything is good.”

  And just as she is getting up, someone knocks on the front door.

  It is the same group we bowled with. Everyone is casually dressed for a night in, carrying in more food, from wings to mini burgers to taquitos. They all settle in with food and drinks, ready for an evening of laughs.

  Garrett

  As the night progresses, I watch as Toni grows more relaxed and comfortable with the people around her. It is amazing what a few weeks can do. I know there is still so much to learn about her, but there’s no going back now.

  “Time to head out, darlin’,” I inform Toni, knowing it’s time we leave. Maybe if we leave, the others will too. Give Lola some quiet.

  “Okay.” She gets up from the floor.

  At the door, I kiss Lola’s cheek. “Thank you for the evening.”

  She gives me a hug and turns to Toni and hugs her tight. She whispers something in Toni’s ear I can’t hear. Toni giggles and tells her, “Stop it.” The devilish, matching grins they wear is enough to make me curious.

  I head out of the complex toward Toni’s place.

  “Where are you going?” she asks.

  “Your place. It’s closer.”

  “Are you dropping me off?” she asks, her tone changing.

  “Nope. We are sleeping at your place,” I inform her.

  “You want to spend the night at my place?” We have not spent any time at her place. I’ve been there but only to pick her up, but we always end up sleeping or hanging at my place.

  “Sure.”

  “Why?”

  “Like I said, it’s closer. No need to drive too far.” I can tell she’s unsure about this.

  “Okay.” She sits back in her seat.

  Why is she nervous about going to her place? All of the worst scenarios run through my head on the short drive there.

  We walk into her place, and everything is just like the last time I was here.

  “Here we are.” She sounds really nervous, which makes my stomach turn.

  I can’t take it anymore. “Do you not want me here? Should I leave?” I’m beginning to get angry, but I can’t explain why.

  “No. I want you. But here?” She looks at me and waves her hand sadly.

  “Yes, here. Why not here?” I come closer to her, placing my hands on her cheeks, pulling her gaze up to me. I want to see her eyes as she explains.

  “Because your place is so much nicer. Your bed is bigger. This is it. This is my place. No other room to go to unless you count the bathroom.” She comes forward, hiding her face by placing her forehead on my chest.

  “Nuh uh. Look at me.” I wait until her eyes are on me again. “This is your place. No roommate to worry about intruding on us. A fridge with food. A TV to watch. So what if it is small? It has everything we need.” I place my lips on hers greedily, the kiss heating up quickly. “Undress for me.”

  She takes a hesitant step back, pulling her shirt over her head. She kills me with her bras. This one is mesh, and I can see her perky nipples harden as she works off her jeans. This is one thing I admire about her. She is confident in her skin. She can parade around me in the barest of clothing or completely naked with no qualms.

  I place my hand in between her legs to feel her wetness, and she widens her stance.

  “Lie down.” I watch as she lies on her back in the middle of the bed.

  I strip down to my boxer briefs before joining her.

  

  The morning sun is coming through her blinds as I hear her phone ping a message. Lola, it is too early, is the first thought that comes to mind. Toni is tucked in my side, naked. I don’t think we have ever made it to bed clothed. She is still blissfully sleeping, so I quietly get up to silence her phone. I pull it out from under the clothes we have discarded on the floor when it pings again.

  Call me asap

  It’s from Alex. Guessing it may be important, I decide to wake her.

  “Darlin’.” I shake her shoulder a bit then kiss it. “Wake up.”

  “Hmm…” She turns her face toward me and peeks one eye open. “Go back to sleep. It’s too early.” She turns her face away from me.

  I kiss her shoulder again then state, “Your phone has been going off. Alex said to call him ASAP.”

  “What?” She sits up quickly. “You read my messages?” Her tone is accusatory.

  “No. I was going to silence it because it went off a few times. When I picked it up, it went off, and that is what the text said on the screen. Besides, I don’t know your password.” And with that, I drop her phone next to her and get out of bed for the second time this morning to slip my clothes on and leave.

  She quickly follows me out of bed, leaving her phone. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say. I was wrong.”

  I stop, keeping my back to her. The accusing tone stung. But more than that, what is she still hiding?

  “I’m sorry,” she says again, pressing herself into my
back. My resolve is fading.

  “So can I ask who Alex is?” I slowly turn around to see her face as she answers. She stays mum, so I press. “Well?”

  “It’s my cousin.” She pulls back, crossing her arms to hide her breasts.

  “And your cousin is needing your attention this early in the morning because…”

  “I don’t know yet. I haven’t looked at my phone.” Her tone is hard, but there is fear in her eyes. Fear of what?

  “Be my guest.” I wave my hand over to the bed where I left her phone.

  As she makes her way back in bed to check her phone, it pings again. I begin dressing to make my exit. My instincts are telling me to leave, but my heart is willing me to stay and find out what is going on. I know very little about her family. Each time they come up, she vaguely answers and changes the subject. I haven’t pressed, giving her the time to share. I know she does not come from much. Scholarships and her apartment tell me at least that much.

  As I slide on my clothes, I watch as she is furiously typing out messages.

  “Is everything okay?” I ask, not knowing if she will answer or even give me any information.

  “No, it’s not.” As she looks up, her eyes are watery as if she wants to cry. “I’m not sure what is up, but if I had to guess, it’s either my asshole uncle or bitch of a mom that has screwed something up again.”

  “What can I do?” I ask, hating to see the pain in her eyes.

  “Nothing.” She shakes her head. Her gaze drops to her lap, and the faintest whisper I barely hear says, “Absolutely nothing.” It’s as if all the spunk and fight I have come to love about her has been let out.

  “Please…let me help,” I plead. The direction this is going feels over.

  “I need to go to my grandmother’s house. They are expecting me.” She is from town. I had assumed by a couple of things she has said but didn’t know for sure.

  “Okay, call me later?” The statement comes out more as a question.

  She only nods before getting out of bed and pulling a shirt on. She walks over to me, hands on my shoulders, and pulls me down for a long kiss. There is a sadness in this kiss. If I didn’t know any better, she is telling me goodbye.