But this was it, this was what he had to do. This was his chance to save her.
“Because I was drunk and you were there.” The lie tasted bitter in his mouth. Her jaw fell open and the tears poured out. He took a deep breath before twisting the knife, ensuring he severed any ties she had left to him. “Quit embarrassing yourself, Victoria. And quit embarrassing me.” Another deep breath. He felt completely disgusted with himself for what was coming next. “Grow up.”
He walked away from her, nearly ran. Stormed right past his friend and continued walking. He couldn’t look at her anymore. It was tearing him apart.
Truthfully, Gabe liked Victoria. He did. He thought she was smart and sweet and honest, the most selfless person he’d ever known. She would set herself on fire to keep somebody warm, no matter who that person was.
On top of being an amazing person, she’d given him one of the best nights of his life. For the first time in as long as he could remember, Gabe had felt alive. Her body against his, her soft moans, her tender kisses, they made him feel human, like maybe there was a chance for him to be more, to be better.
But she had said she loved him, and that wasn’t something he could allow. He was in no position to have somebody love him, especially not somebody like her. He would hurt her, no doubt. And he wasn’t going to sit back and let that happen. She was a good girl, and he was a mess, and he wasn’t going to poison her with his issues. No way.
So he broke her heart. Because he’d rather do it now than later, he’d rather tear her apart and sever any tie that she had to him while it was all new and fresh so that she could move on and find happiness somewhere else. She deserved that. And he deserved…
His eyes fell to the half empty beer bottle poking out from his pocket. His third of the day, and it wasn’t even two in the afternoon.
He deserved to drown at the bottom of this bottle for all the fucking shit he’d done.
Gabe hoped that Victoria would understand someday. Or he hoped that she’d forever hate him. That would be better than her loving him… that would be better than her ruining herself for him.
He did the right thing. He was being the good guy. He kept telling himself that, but still, he struggled to believe it. He wanted to save her, and this had been his way of doing that. He only hoped it worked… and deep down, somewhere inside of him, he hoped she’d forgive him one day.
***
VICTORIA SAT ON THE floor of her shower, hot water rushing over her, soaking her clothes. Black lines ran down her cheeks, her blonde hair sticking to her face. Her lips trembled as her body ran out of tears to cry. She felt numb.
He didn’t care about her. Not at all. Worse, he was embarrassed by her… she swallowed hard, squeezing her eyes shut and willing away the urge to vomit. She felt sick, broken, torn into a million tiny pieces.
Her mind went back to his tender kisses, the way his lips moved passionately against hers. She thought about when she gave herself to him, how he moved in so slowly, making sure she was okay every moment. He’d stared into her eyes, kissing her, pulling out slowly and then shoving back inside. The slight pain quickly transformed into pleasure, their bodies mixing and melting together.
She thought about her pleasure overflowing, her body squeezing tight around him as his breathing came heavier and heavier, as he thrust harder and harder into her. She remembered feeling his release as he exploded in her, remembered the way his hands held her so tight, as if he wouldn’t survive if she moved away from him. She remembered…
Victoria shot up, standing so quickly that it made her dizzy. She ripped her clothes off and stood in the shower naked, cranking up the hot water and covering herself in body wash. She took a hard cloth and scrubbed her entire body, from her toes up to her neck, scrubbing and scrubbing until her skin was raw.
No matter how much she scrubbed, or how hot she made the water, she could still feel his hands on her skin. She rinsed off and stepped out of the shower, wiping the mirror off and staring at herself.
Her flesh was red and raw, her cheeks blackened with bleeding mascara, her hair sticking to her face and upper body. She had never felt as weak as she did in this moment, but as she stared at her face in the mirror, something came over her, spreading like a wildfire throughout her body and in her very soul.
“I will never be weak again,” she muttered to herself. A vow. A promise. Never again.
Chapter Two
SEVEN YEARS LATER...
Victoria Wilson stared at her empty New York City apartment. Nothing remained, not even boxes. Her home for the last five years had been reduced to bare walls and a stained carpet, nothing more. She sighed, knowing that the memories she made here would stick with her, but, at the same time, happy to be moving on.
Truthfully, Victoria wasn’t a city girl; she never had been. She moved to New York to go to school, and now, at twenty seven years old, she had her doctorate, a beautiful resume, and bold plans for her future. It was time to move on, and she was happy for that, as much as she’d miss this place.
New York had been good to her, and while the hustle and bustle was the complete opposite of what she’d been used to, she was grateful for it… it made her stronger. In New York, you had to be tough, or the city and its people would eat away at you. So, she’d made a decision, and she’d decided to be tough.
She had moved to New York seven years ago, a few weeks after she had graduated with her Bachelor’s in Psychology. She planned to continue her studies in Ohio, the place she’d called home, but things happened, and she just couldn’t bare to face her home anymore. And so she packed everything up and moved ten hours away to the cultural capital of the world, where she had spent the last seven years hustling to make something of herself.
And boy, had she done it.
Renowned in her field, Victoria was ready to open up her own private practice, to realize her dream. Unfortunately, New York was not the place to do that. She couldn’t afford that here, not with student loans to pay or rent that was higher than her parents’ mortgage. Sure, she could keep working at the research facility she had been with for the past couple years, but as many as she’d helped there, she knew she could help so many more people if she opened up her own practice in a city that needed her. And so, after much deliberation, she had decided to move back to the city she called home.
Victoria had only been back home once since she left, and it was a day she didn’t want to think about. Three years earlier, Amy, her best friend and sister, was driving home with a friend after a night of heavy drinking, and they wrapped her car around a pole. Her brother, Gabe, didn’t even bother to show up at the funeral.
Victoria couldn’t think about that man without getting angry. He had taken her innocence and broken her heart, but more than that, he killed her best friend.
No, Gabe wasn’t in the car that night, but he’d been drinking heavily for as long as she could remember, driving around like it was no big deal. Amy looked up to him, she always had, and he taught her that it was okay to have one too many drinks and get behind the wheel of a car.
And so, she did what her big brother always did. And it got her killed.
And he didn’t even show up at her funeral.
Victoria could never accept what he had done to Amy. He blurred the lines of right and wrong and his little sister paid the ultimate price.
Victoria hated Gabe. For more reasons than one.
Going back home threatened many memories, of Gabe, of Amy, but she would do it anyway. They were both just ghosts now.
She promised many years ago that she would use her life to do something meaningful, to help people. With all the problems going on in her hometown, she knew that’s where she was needed most, and so she’d return, nothing like the woman she was seven years ago and far stronger than a little girl afraid of memories she’d long left behind.
Victoria took one last bittersweet glance around her apartment before closing the door behind her and locking it. She had a long drive ahead
of her, and it was best to get moving. She let her hand linger one more moment on the door before turning away and heading down the stairs of her building.
***
SEVEN YEARS EARLIER…
The buzzing of her phone in her hand woke Victoria from her sleep. Damn it!
Victoria couldn’t remember the last time she’d gotten to sleep at a decent hour, spending far too long doing anything to distract herself from the ache she’d felt in her chest every time she thought about him. Who would be calling her so late at night?
Victoria normally didn’t answer unknown numbers, but she was already awake, so why not?
Clicking the green button and holding the phone to her ear, Victoria quietly asked, “hello?”
“Vic? Vic, is that you?”
Chills ran down her spine. Victoria pulled the blanket tightly against her chest and sat up.
“Gabe?” Just saying his name felt like a knife to her gut.
“Yeah, sweetheart. Vic, it’s me. It’s Gabe.”
Her heart was beating way too fast. She looked around the bare walls of her bedroom. Boxes were still piled up; she’d barely started to unpack. And she was only here because… because of Gabe.
“What’s up?” she finally forced herself to ask.
“I took your number out of Amy’s phone.”
Her heart continued to thud in her chest.
“Why?”
“I think… I think I might’ve been a little bit mean to you a few weeks ago. Was I a little bit mean to you a few weeks ago?” He was slurring his words.
“Gabe, are you drunk?”
“Answer the question, kiddo.”
Victoria sighed. “Yes.”
“Do you hate me for it?”
Not even a little bit. “Yes.”
“Okay, honey. Good. That’s good. You be good, now.”
The line went dead.
Victoria slowly pulled the phone away from her ear, staring down at it and not knowing what to make of the phone call. She brought her hand up to her neck, rubbing it in an effort to calm herself down.
What was that supposed to mean?
Victoria stared at the clock. 1:47 AM.
It looked like she would have yet another sleepless night.
***
“HELP! PLEASE!” RANG the small voice of a little girl. She couldn’t have been older than nine, and the tears streaming down her face clearly showed her distress. “Over here! Please!”
She led them to a young man, laying on his back and moaning out incoherent words.
“How old is your brother, sweetie?” asked Jason, turning the boy over onto his side.
“He’s nineteen,” she choked.
“Matthews, get a phone and contact the parents. Find out if the girl is coming with us or staying here.”
Gabe nodded, pulling the little girl from her brother’s side as the boy began to vomit.
“Okay, honey. Where are your parents?” Gabe calmly asked the little girl.
“They are out, my brother was watching me…” Gabe cringed.
“Do you know their phone number?” he asked.
The little girl nodded, handing him a piece of paper with a number written on it. Gabe quickly dialed the number into his phone. The parents were horrified, genuine concern creeping through the phone as they promised to rush over to the hospital. Gabe turned his attention back to the little girl.
“Okay, hun. We’re going to take your brother to the hospital, okay? We’ll bring you with us so you can help us take care of him.” Gabe looked at the little girl, putting a hand on her shoulder to try and give her some comfort. She sniffled, wiping her face and nodding at him.
He held out his hand and she took it. He held on tight and walked her to the ambulance, sliding her into the passenger seat and belting her in.
“Jason!” he yelled. “Let’s go! You got this?”
Jason walked forward, the kid hanging onto his side and stumbling along. Gabe ran forward, opening the back doors and then walking over to the other side of the teenager.
“How we doing, kid?” Gabe asked. The boy moaned in response. Gabe chuckled, an attempt at lightening the mood.
They were just about in the back of the ambulance when the boy started vomiting again. Gabe and Jason paused, holding him up as he heaved, emptying his stomach onto the street outside of his house. Gabe rubbed his back as he took heavy breaths.
“You’re alright, kid. This is good. It’s good to get it out.” The kid smiled, the first real sign of life in him. Gabe smiled back. “Doing good, kid. Doing good.” They lifted him into the back of the ambulance, sitting him down on the bed and giving him a bucket in case his stomach decided to empty itself again.
“You wanna take the back?” Jason asked.
“Yeah, I got this,” Gabe nodded. “He’s coming to.”
Jason walked around to the driver’s side and hopped into the front seat. Gabe jumped in the back, closing the doors behind him.
“What’s your name, kid?”
“Michael.” His voice was weak, tired, but his consciousness was a relief to Gabe. This kid would be fine, he just needed some fluids and some sleep. Nonetheless, the ambulance was called, and they were heading to the hospital.
When they finally pulled in at the ER doors, Michael was falling in and out of consciousness. Gabe worried for the kid, carefully monitoring his respiratory status and making sure he stayed on his side. Handing him off to the doctors, Gabe watched as Jason took the little girl to two incredibly concerned parents who were waiting at the emergency room entrance.
The father picked her up, burying his face in her hair as the mother hugged them both. Then the mother made eye contact with Gabe, walking over to him.
“You were the one we talked to on the phone?” she asked him.
“Yes, ma’am,” he responded.
She wrapped her arms around him and he froze for a moment, not expecting the action from her. Then he put an arm around her, patting her back and muttering the ‘it’s okay’’s that he knew she needed to hear.
“You think that? He’s going to be okay?” she asked, pulling back and looking at his eyes with desperation.
“Yes. He’s going to be fine. Trust me.”
“He’s been having so many problems… he’s so young. I don’t know what to do with him…” she trailed off, her eyes falling to the ground as she rubbed the skin of her neck.
“When he’s feeling better, how about I talk to him?” Gabe offered. He shouldn’t have done it, but he saw himself in that boy, and suddenly, he knew he had to do this. For him, for his sister, for every other person he let down over the years. “I went through the same thing when I was younger, and now I’m here. I might be able to get through to him.”
The relief in that mother’s eyes tugged at Gabe’s heart, and she just nodded and embraced him again. He jotted down his phone number for her and headed back to Jason. They had a job to do, and for a Friday night, 11:30 was early. It was going to be a long night, and tomorrow morning, he’d be talking to Michael. Hopefully talking some sense into him, like he wished someone would’ve done to him all those years ago.
***
THE APARTMENT WAS SMALL and perfect. As Victoria brought up the last of her boxes, she fell onto the couch, letting her eyes wander around her new home. The small apartment was fully furnished and modernized, leaving her to fill it only with extra decor and her personal belongings. She had a living room, a nice kitchen, two bedrooms, and a bathroom.
It was more space than she needed, and yet she was paying less than a third of what she had been paying back in New York. She sighed and smiled to herself, even more happy with her decision to move back here and help the people in the city she had grown up in.
Her moment of relaxation was short lived, as she had to head down to the office and finish setting things up there.
Victoria wasn’t quite ready to take private clients, but she’d set up free group meetings to begin on Saturday. She alrea
dy had four people sign up, and she was hopeful that more would come. Grabbing her purse and her keys, she made her way to the office, which was only a short walk from her apartment complex.
The office was small, a tiny powder blue waiting room upfront, which had a welcome desk, two chairs, and a small beige couch. She also had a flat screen mounted on the wall, which played a video loop of waves crashing against the shore. She had that added to calm down anyone who was in the waiting room, an important task considering the type of clients she’d have in her office.
Through a closed door, the hallway led to three rooms, all of which had been soundproofed for a pretty penny. First, a large room for group sessions. Next, a small room for one-on-one’s. And, lastly, Victoria’s office, at the end of the hall, which had a desk, computer, filing cabinets, and a couch in the event a client entered her office to speak with her.
After making sure everything was in order, Victoria collapsed onto the couch in her office, laying back and staring up at the ceiling.
It felt weird being home. She knew it would, but she didn’t realize just how weird it would be. She desperately wanted to talk to Amy, but she was gone, now… Victoria tried to push away the thought. She shouldn’t let her mind go there. It just hurt too much.
Well, even if Amy was gone, Victoria could still talk to her. She was planning to visit her family the next day, so she had the rest of the evening off. Everything was squared away at the office, so she might as well go pay her best friend a visit.
Standing from the couch, she grabbed her bag and headed out. The cemetery was quite a ways away, but it was nice out, so why not take the walk? Victoria locked up and started walking, anxious to talk to her friend and tell her what she was doing here.
She knew Amy would be proud of her.
***
Hooked On You Page 3
