Love or Something Like It

by Laurie Friedman

  © 2015 by Laurie Friedman

  All rights reserved. International copyright secured. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise—without the prior written permission of Lerner Publishing Group, Inc., except for the inclusion of brief quotations in an acknowledged review.

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  A division of Lerner Publishing Group, Inc.

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  Minneapolis, MN 55401 USA

  For reading levels and more information, look up this title at www.lernerbooks.com.

  Main body text set in Janson Text LT Std 12/17.

  Typeface provided by Linotype AG.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Friedman, Laurie B., 1964–

  Love or something like it / by Laurie Friedman.

  pages cm. — (The mostly miserable life of April Sinclair ; #4)

  Summary: As summer approaches, April is conflicted about going to camp and missing time with new boyfriend Matt and her friend Sophie, who’ll be visiting. Is her flame with Matt strong enough to survive a long absence?

  ISBN 978-1-4677-0928-6 (trade hard cover : alk. paper)

  ISBN 978-1-4677-0944-6 (ppk.)

  ISBN 978-1-4677-6190-1 (EB pdf)

  [1. Dating (Social customs)—Fiction. 2. Friendship—Fiction. 3. Family life—Fiction. 4. Camps—Fiction. 5. Diaries—Fiction.] I. Title.

  PZ7.F89773Lov 2015

  [Fic]—dc23

  2014018570

  Manufactured in the United States of America

  1 – BP – 12/31/14

  eISBN: 978-1-46776-190-1 (pdf)

  eISBN: 978-1-46777-788-9 (ePub)

  eISBN: 978-1-46777-789-6 (mobi)

  For my fabulous nieces and nephew,

  Hannah, Mimi, Tillie, and Louis!

  Love you all!

  —Aunt Laurie

  For I ne’er saw true beauty till this night.

  —Romeo

  Sunday, March 9, 10:49 p.m.

  Last night of spring break

  I’m not a Shakepeare fan, but I love this quote because it’s so romantic. When Romeo saw Juliet, he was captivated by her beauty. I’d like to think Matt felt the same way when he saw me tonight, but since I was sporting oversized pajama pants and an old Camp Silver Shores XL T-shirt, with a face full of zit cream, chances are pretty good he didn’t.

  I had just turned my light off when I heard a knock at my window. I got out of bed and pulled my curtain back, and Matt was on the other side. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Part of me was happy he was there, but another part of me wished I could have rewritten the script and done a quick-change act before I opened the curtain. I hated that Matt caught me looking like such a mess.

  “Come outside,” he mouthed through the glass.

  I said a silent apology to Mom as I discreetly used my curtain to wipe the zit cream off. No way was I letting Matt Parker see me with white goop all over my face.

  As I opened the window, Matt put his finger to his lips for me to be extra quiet. I would have been anyway—if my parents had any idea I was climbing out my bedroom window in my pajamas, they would add it to the long list of things they’ve already told me I’m not allowed to do with Matt. He put his hand on my knee as I settled in next to him on my front porch. Even though the neighbors’ view is mostly blocked by the two large pine trees in front of my house, I did a quick scan of my street to make sure no one was out and could see us.

  “You look cute in your PJs,” Matt whispered.

  I glanced down at my flannel pants and faded T-shirt. Matt had on jeans and a T-shirt that showed off his biceps in this amazing way. I felt dumpy in comparison. “What are you doing here?” I whispered back. I tried to tuck some of the excess fabric of my pajama bottoms under my legs.

  Matt grinned. His white teeth actually glistened in the moonlight. “I wanted to see you. Don’t you want to see me?” he asked.

  I nodded. “I just don’t want my parents to hear us,” I whispered. Even though my bedroom is the only one on the front side of the house by the front door, my parents and sisters are just across the hall.

  I waited for Matt to say something, but he didn’t. We sat side by side on my front porch, looking up at the moon and the stars. “So?” I said after the silence seemed to be taking a little longer than it should.

  Matt threw my question back at me. “So?” he said. Then he added, “What are you thinking?”

  I racked my brain to come up with what I wanted to say. Since Matt came to see me, I thought he should be the one to talk first. But one thing I’ve learned about Matt since he moved in next door last year is that unless he has something he really wants to say, I seem to be the one who does most of the talking.

  I decided to say what was really on my mind. “I think I look stupid in these pajamas.”

  Matt smiled and squeezed my knee. “I already told you I think you look cute.” He raised an eyebrow at me, like he was waiting for me to move on to the next topic.

  I took a deep breath. “I guess I’m kind of sad spring break is over.”

  Matt nodded like he wanted me to elaborate.

  “You know, it was fun hanging out together, and I’m bummed that tomorrow we have to go back to school.” I probably should have stopped talking at that point and just let it seem like my only issue was the fact that classes and homework were less than twelve hours away, but Matt just sat there, looking at me, so I kept going.

  “It’ll be kind of weird to not be together,” I said slowly. “You know, like, I’ll be at the middle school and you’re in high school, so we won’t see each other all day.” It was definitely Matt’s turn to talk. He ran his fingers through his sandy hair like he was trying to think of something to say, but he didn’t say anything. So I did. “I’ll miss you,” I added.

  I wanted to reel the words back in as soon as they left my mouth. I couldn’t believe I told Matt Parker I’ll miss him. I sounded ridiculous.

  Matt must have thought so too, because he broke his code of silence and started laughing. I was glad it was dark outside and he couldn’t see me blushing. I shifted, partly because my butt hurt from sitting on the hard bricks but mainly because I was feeling like a complete and total idiot for telling Matt I’ll miss him.

  I think Matt could tell, because he did something totally cool and amazing. He lifted me up by my waist and pulled me onto his lap. I couldn’t even believe it. One minute I was dying of embarrassment, and the next I was sitting on Matt Parker’s lap. I could feel his thigh muscles tense beneath me.

  “Well?” Matt asked as I settled into the fold of his legs. His face was inches from mine. I could feel his breath when he exhaled. My stomach did a backflip.

  “Well,” I said back, mostly because I couldn’t think of anything else to say.

  “You know we live next door to each other, so we’ll still see each other,” he said softly.

  “I know.” I tried to shrug like it was no big deal.

  Then Matt kissed me. Softly. On the lips. It was such a sweet kiss. His mouth lingered on mine for a long time, and when he pulled back he said, “This will be our place.”

  “My front porch?”

  Matt’s blue eyes twinkled. “Your front porch after dark.”

  The way he said it gave a whole new meaning to the bricks and mortar that have been just outside my bedroom window since the day I was born. “I like that idea,” I told Matt.

  He smiled a ridiculously cute smile. Then he lifted me as he stood and planted another kiss on my lips. “See ya.” He waved as he walked toward his house.

  I
felt like Juliet as I watched my Romeo go back to his castle. Except I bet she wouldn’t have been caught wearing baggy pajamas.

  11:17 p.m.

  Can’t sleep

  I’m wide awake. I don’t know if it’s because I’m still thinking about what just happened with Matt or because I’m wondering what’s going to happen when I go to school tomorrow. I don’t know what people are going to say when they find out Matt and I are going out.

  It’s not like it’s a secret. But I didn’t exactly post it online either. The thing is that Matt and I have a history, and in some people’s opinions, not an entirely good one. Everyone knows he’s the reason Billy and I broke up.

  It’s still hard for me not to think about what happened when he kissed me while Billy and I were going out, and how everyone freaked when they found out. Especially Billy and Brynn. I mean, Billy had good reason to be upset. Brynn too, but not as much. And no matter how many times I tried to explain things to her, she couldn’t see anything from my perspective.

  She just couldn’t understand that sometimes things happen that aren’t planned, and Matt Parker was one of those things.

  I never planned to kiss him last fall. And when he kissed me, I hadn’t expected to feel the way I did. Or that it would cause so much drama when everyone found out. When people realized that Matt and I weren’t actually a thing, it finally blew over.

  But now Matt and I are a thing. It’s not that I’m embarrassed about it. He’s so hot, and the four days we’ve been going out have made this maybe the best week of my life. It was just Matt and me, and no one else. And to be honest, I’m not looking forward to finding out what happens when other people get added into the mix.

  The only people who know about us so far are my family, Sophie, Billy, and Brynn, and even their reactions have been mixed.

  To be fair, Billy was cool when I told him. He actually gave me a hug and told me to “trust my judgment.” He said it in a reassuring way, like he respected my choice.

  Sophie was cool too. She was more than cool. When I told her, she screamed so loud into the phone, it sounded like she was right next to me and not thousands of miles away in New York.

  Brynn was the total opposite. She was like, “Do you think that’s a good idea?” I didn’t think I should have to tell her I wouldn’t be doing it if I didn’t think it was a good idea. It bummed me out that Brynn couldn’t be happy for me. We’ve definitely had our differences this year. But still, she’s been my best friend since kindergarten, and it would’ve been nice if she could have been a little more excited for me.

  My family’s reaction wasn’t much better. When Mom and Dad found out, they sat me down and gave me the Matt Parker Rule Book (Matt’s name for all the stuff we’re not allowed to do together). My sisters, who at seven and ten are too young to have an opinion about who I go out with, made it crystal clear that they like Billy more than Matt. Even my extended family—two aunts, two uncles, four cousins, my eighty-year-old grandmother, and her newlywed husband, Willy—have managed to weigh in on the topic.

  Tonight at dinner at Gaga’s, they grilled me about Matt and it was seriously annoying. I wish Sophie could have been here visiting Willy, her grandpa. Sophie, Gaga, and my cousin Amanda are the only ones who don’t disapprove of my relationship. Why can’t they all just trust my judgment knowing that I like him?

  I like him a lot. I more than like him. I keep replaying the day I went to the beach with him earlier this week and how we kissed in the ocean and then he wrote the note on my arm asking me if I would go out with him. It was hands-down the best day of my life. Since it happened, it’s what I’ve thought about every night as I’ve gone to sleep. And it’s what I’m thinking about now, so I don’t get why thoughts of other people keep creeping into my brain. But they are.

  Why do I care what other people think? I don’t. OK. Maybe I do, a little. Dad always says when you start worrying about what other people think is when you have something to start worrying about.

  Seriously, April. Get a grip.

  I don’t care what you think about me.

  I don’t think about you at all.

  —Coco Chanel

  Monday, March 10, 7:22 a.m.

  At the kitchen table

  Eating funnel cakes

  (For breakfast)

  A bad sign

  I have a bad feeling about this morning, and it’s all because Dad made funnel cakes for breakfast. May reminded him it’s what we ate when we went to the circus last year, which made me think, (a) Who serves circus food to their children for what is widely considered to be the most important meal of the day? And (b) When everyone at school finds out I’m going out with Matt, will I be talked about like some freaky Big Top attraction?

  One thing’s for sure: I’m not ready to face the crowds.

  8:52 p.m.

  No one said anything. All day, during school, I kept waiting for it. I was sure that one minute, everything would be totally normal, kids going about their day, and in the next, there would be an information explosion. I pictured students at Faraway Middle examining bits and pieces of my story like shrapnel, and adding their own opinions to the mix.

  As weird as that sounds, I think part of me might have preferred it like that. At least I would have known what people were thinking. But that’s not what happened.

  No one said a word about Matt and me. Were they just thinking things or saying stuff behind my back? I know it sounds like I’m paranoid, but when everyone found out I kissed Matt while I was going out with Billy, it was the only thing anyone was talking about.

  I just don’t want to be that thing again.

  9:17 p.m.

  Still thinking

  I don’t know why I’m hung up on this.

  The only people who could have said something at school were Billy and Brynn. Since no one said anything, I don’t think they did. The only other person who could say anything would be Matt.

  He doesn’t say much when he’s with me, so I don’t think he would to other people.

  9:21 p.m.

  Not taking any chances

  Texting Matt

  Me: Have you told anybody?

  Matt: Told anybody what?

  Me: Oops!

  Me: Sorry! Meant for Brynn.

  9:39 p.m.

  Where is my brain?

  I can’t believe I just texted that to Matt.

  I realized how dumb I sounded the minute he texted back, so I quickly made up the excuse about Brynn. It’s been eighteen minutes and he hasn’t texted back. It usually freaks me out when he doesn’t text back.

  But this time I’m glad he let it drop.

  Tuesday, March 11, 1:43 p.m.

  Study Hall

  EVERYONE KNOWS!!!

  I had a bad feeling when I got to school this morning that today would be the day, and I was right. At lunch, I was sitting with Emily, Kate, and Vanessa and we were talking about dance practice, which is starting up again at the high school after school today, when Julia Lozano came up to our table.

  “April, I heard you’re going out with Matt Parker! Is it true?”

  Emily, Kate, and Vanessa all looked at me. Emily looked like she couldn’t believe I hadn’t told her. Kate looked like she wanted confirmation. And Vanessa looked like the salad she was eating went down the wrong pipe.

  Everyone was staring at me. I wasn’t sure if I was going to throw up or pass out. I said the first thing that came to mind. “Who told you?” It could only be one of two people.

  “I can’t say.” Julia ran her fingers across her lips like they were zipped shut.

  I had to know. “Was it Billy?”

  Julia laughed. “God, no!” she said.

  I had my answer.

  6:45 p.m.

  Home from dance

  Crappy day

  Kids are supposed to go to school to talk about things like algebraic equations, chemical elements, and verb tenses. But today, I was the only thing anyone was talking about. News of Ma
tt and me was everywhere. People weren’t just talking about me. They were talking to me. At least eight people (including Beth Schimberg, who almost never talks) asked me if it was true.

  As I was walking into math class, Ashley Simon actually came up to me and said she was surprised to hear Matt and I are a thing. The way she said “thing” made it sound kind of dirty or dark. I wasn’t sure how to respond.

  Brynn has math with us and she heard Ashley. I shot her a be-a-good-best-friend-and-protect-me look. But the only thing Brynn did was ask Ashley where she got her skirt.

  Even though I was kind of mad at Ashley, the person I was really mad at was Brynn. What made her think she has the right to tell everyone I’m going out with Matt?

  When I passed Billy on the way from math to English, he actually asked me if I was OK, which I know was sweet, but it somehow made me feel worse. It meant he’d heard people talking about it too.

  I could hardly get through the rest of my afternoon. And things weren’t much better when I got to dance practice. During break, Matt and I were the only thing anyone wanted to talk about.

  “I don’t think you can trust him,” Chloe said, raising an eyebrow. I’m sure that was her way of reminding me that she’d sort-of liked him last fall, and he’d flirted with her, but it turned out he didn’t really like her back. Or at least, that was how she saw it.

  “Yeah,” said Mya, one of Chloe’s best friends. “We’re in his grade, so we see him all the time.” I wasn’t sure what “seeing him all the time” had to do with anything, but Samantha, one of Chloe’s other best friends, explained it.

  “He’s a flirt,” she said.

  All I wanted to do was change the subject. I didn’t like thinking about Matt flirting with other girls. Plus, I’m the one he asked out.

  “So what do you think of our competition schedule?” I said. Ms. Baumann had just told us that the District competition is early April, and then we have the Regional competition in early May, and if we qualify (which Ms. Baumann said we’d better!) we go to the State competition two weeks later. Thankfully, everyone seemed happy to talk about what’s ahead of us this semester.