Breaking the Chain

by Golden Angel

  Jared was practically in heaven.

  He really didn't enjoy punishment spankings for the punishment, he wasn't a sadist, but he enjoyed knowing he was fulfilling a need for his submissive. He was turned on by having a woman give herself into his hands for discipline that had actually been earned. In the past, he'd tried doing the playful, made-up excuses for punishment, and while he enjoyed it, it didn't fulfill his real needs.

  Even though he'd only gotten in four real, disciplinary smacks to Leigh's upturned ass, this definitely fulfilled that need. That she'd responded so well to it, even immediately looking to him for aftercare when he'd half expected her to jump up or pull away, only made him feel even more contently satisfied.

  "I don't have to spank you again if you don't want me to," he said, pretending indifference - which only worked because he was pretty sure he was reading her correctly, and he didn't think there was any real danger of that.

  "But if we were dating, you'd want to."

  "Yes."

  He could practically feel her mulling it over in her head as she leaned against his shoulder, relaxing even further into his arms. Jared loved aftercare, but this was a whole new level of enjoyment for him. There had been submissives at Stronghold who had earned punishments, who had needed it, and he'd been happy to give them both discipline and aftercare, but there hadn't been a chance of anything more than a discipline scene, emotionally or sexually. Even during the times when he'd been on a break with Marissa, he'd always held back because he'd known he wouldn't send her away when she returned.

  For the first time, someone else's feelings mattered to him more than Marissa's did and he trusted Leigh not to use his own feelings and instincts to control or manipulate him. For the first time, he felt confident that he wouldn’t be drawn back into a situation where he’d be at the mercy of someone else’s desires, someone else’s needs. He had finally stepped away from that situation successfully and he knew he could do it again. Which made him free.

  ******

  Was it weird to want to cuddle with the person who had just spanked her?

  Leigh knew that no one at Stronghold would think so, but some part of her still thought that she should think so. But she was loving it. She didn't even care that her jeans were bunched up between her ankles and knees, or that her butt was still burning (those last four spanks had hurt!), or that she'd told Jared that she just wanted to be friends for now. Cuddling felt good. It felt right. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so safe and secure; Jared was so big that his body practically surrounded hers, and it was wonderful.

  Her fingers stroked his chest, and she wished he wasn't wearing a shirt. Although, it was a good thing he was, otherwise keeping things "friendly" would probably be impossible.

  A thought suddenly occurred to her. "You didn't give me a safe word."

  Which, considering he'd done some pretty hard punishment spanks, seemed like an oversight.

  "I don't do safe words."

  She stiffened, leaning away so she could look at his face as she scowled. "Seriously? What happened to the whole Safe, Sane and Consensual thing?"

  "None of that demands a safe word," Jared said with a shrug. "Not everyone uses them. I don't like them because, in certain situations, a submissive might not realize that they need to use their safe word. Most of the time dominants, realize when their submissive is hitting sub-space or is too into the scene, and so they watch carefully, but relying on a safe word can lead to just as many complications as not having one. Especially if the submissive is particularly stubborn, masochistic or sees it as a point of pride that they don't use their safe word." He raised an eyebrow at Leigh. "Have any of your friends ever used their safe word?"

  She thought about it. "No." Not that she'd heard of. And she was pretty sure she would have heard about it if one of them had.

  "Because their dominants know how to push them without pushing them too far. We watch. We analyze. And, for me, when I'm giving a punishment, it's not up to the submissive to say when she's had enough."

  "You stopped for me," she pointed out.

  "You're new to this, and I only ever intended to give you a taste of what it would be like. Although, if you'd like proof that I'm able to turn you over my knee and give you the punishment spanking you seem to think you deserve..."

  Even though his eyes were glinting with amusement, Leigh squeaked and clung to him, wrapping her arms around his neck to make such a task more difficult. "No, thank you! I'm good! Totally punished. Learned my lesson."

  She felt a little childish saying that, but at the same time it was fun. Not exactly role play, the way Hilary and Liam did it, but more like opening a part of herself that she hadn't been able to indulge in a long time. Angel had complained that Leigh had stopped being as silly and playful because of Michael... now it was like being spanked had brought that part back out of her. In front of a guy, who - rather than chiding her to act "like an adult" - seemed to enjoy it. It felt good to make him laugh instead of frown disapprovingly.

  What else could she do but bask in the attention and approval emanating from him?

  Unfortunately they couldn't do that forever.

  Strangely, putting her pants back on felt more awkward than taking them off had. Maybe in part because it was physically uncomfortable to put them back on. Leigh really regretted wearing such tight jeans as the fabric scraped over sensitive flesh, feeling like sandpaper.

  While Jared had been "looking" for a DVD to put in, she'd snuck a peek at her butt and had been surprised to see it was just a blush pink. After those last four swats, she'd really been expecting red! Once she had her jeans on, she was grateful it wasn't. She could only imagine how uncomfortable it must be to put on tight pants with a red butt!

  More proof that her best friend was crazy.

  Yeah, the pleasurable spanking had been just that, but Leigh knew Jared had been much gentler on her than Adam ever was on Angel. Yet, her friend loved it. Although she doubted Angel would have liked Jared's version of a punishment spanking. Besides, Leigh was the real weirdo because she was already thinking about how, knowing the consequences, she would probably be better motivated to do things like eat and exercise the way she was supposed to.

  There was something nice about the idea of a man who wouldn't just care about her well-being, but would do something about it if she didn't take care of herself. Someone who would help give her motivation when her willpower wasn't enough and who would set down rules and immediate consequences. Leigh sometimes wondered if the real reason she became a teacher was because she'd always thrived within situations that had structure, and she tended to feel anxious and a bit overwhelmed when she was expected to provide all the structure for herself.

  "How about Princess Bride?" Jared asked, glancing over as if to make sure she was fully dressed again.

  She was. And squirming a bit. Sitting down too quickly had made her skin flare with heat again, even though the couch was nicely cushioned. It wasn't a bad kind of heat this time though... nope, this kind of heat made her want to take off her pants for an entirely different reason.

  Ugh, make up your mind, Leigh!

  "Princess Bride is always good," she said. She was pretty sure Jared had picked out the movie before she'd come over - or at least a couple of options to present to her - but she appreciated the semi-privacy he'd given her to get her pants back on. It would have been even more awkward if he'd been watching.

  "I have to admit, it's been a while since I've seen it."

  "Really? I watch it at least twice a year!"

  "I'd have liked to, but ah..." His voice trailed off and Leigh shook her head. The big guy looked so cute when he was unsure of himself, in part because he was so big.

  "We're never going to get anywhere if we try to cut out Michael and Marissa from our conversations completely. They were a huge part of our lives the past few years; I don't expect you to wipe her from your vocabulary," she said, giving him a look that she hoped would remind him
that she'd never had a problem with him talking about Marissa in the past.

  Heck, the fact that they could compare relationships, that they both understood where the other person was coming from and what it was like to come out of such a long relationship, when none of their other friends understood, was part of what she really appreciated about him. The relieved smile that he gave her said he felt the same way.

  "Right. Well, Marissa didn't like it, so I just kind of got out of the habit of watching it."

  Leigh shook her head. "Inconceivable."

  ******

  The only downside to having Leigh come to his place was having to let her drive home. Jared felt like he should be the one leaving, not liking her driving so late at night when she was obviously tired and yawning, but she'd firmly told him no when he'd suggested a sleepover, even though he'd offered to sleep on the couch while she took his bed. She wasn't his to make rules for... but damn did his hand itch again when he walked her out to her car.

  It was freezing out, and she'd told him it wasn't necessary, but he felt like it was the least he could do.

  Of course, it sucked even more when they got to her car. She started the engine to let it heat up, before moving back outside to stand with him, tipping her head back to look at him. He wanted to kiss her. Mist flowed from her parted lips, her breath visible in the cold air, and drawing even more attention to her mouth.

  "Drive safe," he said. "Text me when you get home."

  "If we were dating, would that be a rule?" she asked teasingly, but with the same undercurrent of seriousness she'd shown all evening.

  "Definitely. But for tonight, it's a very, very strong suggestion. Unless, of course, you want me calling Adam to make sure you got home okay."

  "Ha, yeah, fine."

  She paused, tilting her head. Did she want him to kiss her? After all, she'd been the one to say friends.

  He compromised, leaning down to press a quick kiss just beside her lips, enjoying the way she drew in an unsteady breath as he did so. Definitely not unaffected.

  "Think about tonight," he said softly, still leaning down, close enough that the air felt warmer because of the body heat emanating off of both of them. His hands were on her hips, holding their lower bodies close together. "If we were to be in a relationship, I would want to set down guidelines about your health and safety, and I would expect you to follow them. A safe word wouldn't get you out of a punishment. That's the kind of relationship I want. I would respect your decision if you realized that kind of relationship wasn't for you, but as long as you were mine, there'd be rules and consequences for breaking them."

  To his relief, her expression was thoughtful and interested. The little taste of the punishment spanking had to be on her mind, but the idea that she might earn something worse didn't immediately scare her away.

  "You never said anything about this before," she said, although she didn't sound mad.

  Jared gave her a rueful half-smile. "I'm not sure I really believed we'd have a real chance before. The fact that I didn't bring it up before.... well, I don't think my subconscious really felt that it mattered. But now, I'm not going to start something new with someone that's not interested in even the idea."

  "I'm the one that told you I'm interested. Well, sort of." She shook her head as she stumbled over her words, and he could feel that she was starting to shiver. Shit. He needed to let her get in the car and go, even though it felt wrong to let her leave him.

  "Yeah, but now you know what a spanking's actually like," he said. "Really think about whether or not you'd be okay with a real punishment spanking. For not eating, I would never give you anything less than a ten count. Now get in the car and text me when you get home."

  "Yes, Sir," she muttered, and then blushed hotly when he chuckled. "Crap, I mean - I didn't mean -"

  "I know, little girl," he said, dropping another kiss onto the top of her head. She was damn cute when she was flustered. "I already gave you as much of a spanking as you're going to get tonight, unless you don’t get moving now, in which case I will take that as an invitation to warm your pretty little ass some more."

  Half-in, half-out of her car, she turned back to him. "Are you going to be at Stronghold tomorrow?"

  "Yeah, at the door, like always."

  Leigh flashed him a brilliant smile. "Well, maybe I'll see you there."

  When he got back into the warmth of his apartment, he still had a stupidly sappy grin on his face that just wouldn't quit.

  ******

  Despite her late return and her attempt at being silent coming into the house, Leigh wasn't in her room for five minutes before Angel came barging in wearing nothing but a thick, fluffy robe. Leigh knew Angel was wearing nothing under that because Angel didn't wear pajamas and there was no way she would have turned on the light to put on clothes. That would have woken Adam up, despite the fact that he was a pretty heavy sleeper. Chances were, he wouldn't approve of Angel's nosiness, but Leigh hadn't really expected anything less.

  Even though she closed the door behind her fairly quickly, it was still quiet, and then Angel was throwing herself down onto Leigh's bed on her stomach while Leigh giggled and continued changing into her pajamas. Well, the shorts and tank top that she wore as pajamas.

  "Story time!" Angel said, practically singing the words gleefully as she bounced slightly on Leigh's mattress. "So what happened?"

  "What makes you think anything happened?" Leigh asked, teasing.

  "Because it's you and Jared, which means even if nothing happened, something still happened."

  Laughing, Leigh flopped onto the bed on her stomach, side by side with Angel. She looked over her shoulder at her butt. Not even pink anymore. No wonder Angel hadn't said anything.

  "Weeeeeeeeeeell..." she said, drawing the word out, and receiving an elbow in her side from her impatient best friend. "I got my first spanking tonight."

  Even though she tried to say it casually, she could feel her cheeks flushing brightly as she said it. Angel let out an excited squeal, before immediately slapping her hand over her mouth, and both of them froze, listening for any sound that would indicate Adam had woken up.

  Nothing.

  More quietly, Angel squealed again. "Okay, so really, how did that happen?"

  Leigh explained as Angel listened, wide-eyed and excited, giggling and groaning in all the right places - especially when Leigh told her about the punishment part.

  "That's the worst," Angel said sympathetically. "I always forget how much a spanking can really hurt when Adam wants it to. The fun ones are always so... well, you know, fun, even if they hurt."

  "I'm definitely not into the pain, even though the spanking for pleasure did feel good... but Jared was really light on me, so it's not like it really hurt anyway."

  "Well, I like it when it hurts a little."

  Leigh couldn't help but rolling her eyes. "Yes, I'm aware."

  "Shut up." Angel elbowed her again, but this time Leigh elbowed her right back.

  "Spank slut."

  "Pot meet kettle!"

  "Hey, I wasn't into the spanking, I was into how it made me feel," Leigh said, and then hesitated, trying to figure out how to explain it. "Like he was doing it because he really cared. It wasn't just for fun, not even the part that felt good. He wanted me to know what it would be like, so that I could make an informed decision."

  "You know, if it wasn't for all the ex baggage, Jared would be almost too good to be true," Angel said, sighing as she rolled onto her back, careless of the robe as it gaped in front. Not that she had a whole lot of modesty around Leigh anyway. Between theater and their constant trading of clothes, they'd seen each other in various stages of undress as well as completely naked on multiple occasions. "Sweet, caring, not nearly as impulsive or judge-y as some of his friends, patient... But the ex hang-ups are a little worrying."

  "Yeah... When I asked him why he hadn't spanked me before, or even brought up having me try it out, he said it was because he didn't re
ally think we had an actual chance before. I guess because he always expected Marissa to come back."

  "And she did, but he chose you."

  "Well, he chose not to be with her, I don't think that's the same thing. If he and I start dating, he has certain things that he wants. Like making some rules for me and having there be consequences for breaking them. Which I think I'm okay with, but part of me feels like I'm being a bad woman for wanting that. Plus, I can't help but wonder if it's me he really wants to be with, or if he just wants to be with me because he thinks I can give him the kind of relationship that he wants."

  Both of them fell silent for a moment, and Leigh could see Angel was thinking it over. That was something she really appreciated about their friendship - they might not always agree, they might not always understand where the other one was coming from, but they didn't just give each other false platitudes or immediate agreement either. Angel didn't just jump to reassure her that everything would be fine and that she had nothing to worry about.

  "Okay, so one thing at a time - you know I'm all about feminism and women and men being equals in most arenas, blah blah blah, but that doesn't necessarily have to come into the bedroom as well. It's not like me submitting to Adam means that women are never going to make equal pay or that we'll never have a woman president; my personal, private choices don't effect what other women do."

  "Thankfully," Leigh muttered, giggling as Angel shot her a dirty look. "No, you're right. That's not really the problem anyway."

  "Right... so, look. He obviously likes you, and he liked you before you admitted all this wanting rules and discipline stuff right? Even if he hadn't brought it up before, he was still interested in you. He still didn't get back together with Marissa, like he's always done before, and if you think that has nothing to do with you then you're blind. I think the only problem is if you really aren't interested in that kind of relationship."

  "No... I think I am. I like the idea." Leigh said it kind of bashfully, watching Angel's expression to see if her friend judged her.

  Angel just shrugged. "Definitely not the kind of relationship for me, but I can see you in it. Especially with someone like Jared. Michael tried to control you in all the wrong ways, I feel like Jared would do it in all the right ones."