"I've told you, the only reason why we're not absolutely surrounded by dozens of people is because my friends are all away for the summer. Once they all get back, you'll be sick of them, I'm sure."
She tried to keep her tone light as she said, "That reminds me. We've had an idyllic situation at the vicarage, but will need to face Jonathan's return home at some point. He and his wife are the best of people.
"However, two women taking charge in a household is never a good idea, and he is a vicar after all. I can't have my immoderate behavior reflect badly upon him."
He hated the thought of taking her away from her family or them falling out because of him. Of them having to flee from so pleasant a district as though they had committed some crime, when all they had done was fall in love.
"What about that house you said was vacant nearby? The one your brother inherited unexpectedly."
"Oh, yes, Ashton Manor. Jonathan never expected to inherit anything so fine. We didn't even know we were related to the Ashtons, the connection goes back so many generations. But they couldn't find any other heirs except the Earl of Ferncliffe. Who came by that title by some fairly obscure means."
She mentally went through the little property. It was awfully fine. But it would be a lovely home for them and their child. "Hmm. That could be the best solution all around."
"Yet still you hesitate?" he pointed out quietly.
"Oh, not because of us, I assure you. No, it's more that I really don't like taking advantage of another's misfortune. And of course Pamela ought to have a say in what happens to it, since she should have been heir herself were it not for all that nonsense about entailing away from the female line."
"Nonsense for certain. But if neither of them want it?"
"Then I suppose it would be a shame to let it fall into disuse. But it would be awfully large for the two of us, and quite a job to run," she warned.
"We will be blessed with children sooner or later, and there will be visits from you friends and family to look forward to."
She smiled in relief at his words about children. She was tempted to tell him what she suspected, but it was still early days yet. Best to wait until another month passed, at least, just to be sure. And to be certain that the babe was well.
"It's a lovely house, true. But I might be happier in a simple cottage for us both."
"Sarah, my love, you're intelligent enough to run your own estate. If he really doesn't want it, we can make your brother an offer."
She considered it for a short time. "We shall see. Gareth was being trained up to take over the reins as steward. Now he's a French prisoner. I would have to find someone else, or undertake it myself. It would be a big responsibility either way."
"Are you really afraid of the responsibility? Or do you fear living with me openly?" he accused.
She kissed his hand. "I fear nothing. We shall be married as soon as we discuss the situation with Jonathan."
"But I was married. I could still be," he admitted reluctantly.
She worried her lower lip between her teeth. "I can't think why we haven't heard from my brother. But trust me, Jonathan will come back, and will know what to do. He'll like you, I'm sure. In fact, I am willing to bet anything that you not only know each other, you're great friends.
"Besides, I love you, so he can't possibly object. And he certainly can't accuse you of seducing me, of running off with me against my will, now can he?"
He shook his head. "Anyone who knows you, Sarah, knows what a determined woman you are. All the same, explaining how we fell in love is not a conversation I'm looking forward to."
She kissed him gently on the lips. "Then just look forward to our wedding day. For it will happen, I promise. Even if you have to divorce, which will take some time, it will happen eventually."
He heaved a sigh himself now. "I'm sorry to be so worried all the time. It's just that I used to think nothing worse could befall me than what's already happened. But losing you would be far worse, Sarah. I would lose my very reason for living."
"Don't say that!" she said with a shiver of unease. "You're intelligent and hard-working. You've bent under the weight of burdens which would have broken the back of a lesser man. Accidents happen, diseases. I can fall prey to them just as easily as anyone else.
"If you did lose me, darling, I would want you to carry on, no matter what. You haven't come this far with your illness and troubles to give up over me. I'm not worth it. We'll do what we can to help you be independent. I give you my word, my friends are your friends. We'll make sure you are not alone and miserable in the world, no matter what, my love. But you will go on, no matter what, for as long as the good Lord sees fit. We both will."
He took her in his arms for a resounding kiss. "I'm sorry. I just can't help but be frightened after what you told me of your bargain with God."
"Despair is a sin, remember? You will not give way to it, Alexander. I won't let you. I love you, and have no intention of leaving you. I never should have told you about that night."
"No, no I'm glad you did. We promised to be truthful with each other no matter what. I don't want to take what we have for granted, ever," he said, holding her close.
"I'm relieved to hear it. But we also can't let it hang over us like a shadow. Now, where was I? Oh, yes, another session in the Baths in the afternoon. Then we can go out in the gig to some of the local beauty spots. There will also be some shopping. We need to get you fitted with more new clothes, in lighter-weight fabrics."
"I'm already appalled at how much you've spent upon me."
"Don't be silly. We are as one now. You provide all sorts of things for me that money can't buy. Love, companionship, good advice and a host of other things."
"I just never imagined myself a kept man," he grumbled.
"How is it any different from a man keeping me?"
"That's the natural order of things," he said almost primly.
"And Mrs. Miller looking after her sick husband?" she challenged. "How many other women are like her, tending to loved ones maimed or injured in the war? I'm not the only woman in the world who has had to be strong for the man she loves. I doubt I shall be the last."
"I suppose you're right," he conceded reluctantly.
"I am right. Now think no more of it. I would just as soon forget all about your old life and concentrate on the future."
"I don't want to look back any more either."
"Then we won't," she said firmly, kissing him hard.
When she eventually lifted her lips she continued, "Anyway, the evenings here in Bath. What do you think?"
"I have no objection to going to the concerts, Sarah."
"The Duke has a box at the theater if you think you would enjoy it, but we don't have to go if you don't wish to. Then there will be recitals and so on at the Abbey. We can go to a ball or two in the Lower Rooms. It will be much less formal there. But we don't have to go if you're fatigued or bored."
"Or if you are fatigued or bored."
"I'm a bit tired now with the drive. If you don't mind an early dinner and bed, that would be most welcome."
"For me too." He grinned.
They each had a bath and then met in her room, and curled up in front of the fire on the divan.
"Happy?"
"Yes, very. You?" Sarah asked, snuggling into his embrace.
"I couldn't be more happy if I tried."
"Well, I can think of one way." She kissed him lingeringly.
He instantly got the hint. He stood up, swung her into his arms, and headed for the bed, his hands divesting her of her wrapper the instant her back hit the mattress. His hotly seeking mouth roved all over her quivering flesh until there was no Sarah and Alexander, just one soul seeking its ultimate bliss.
Chapter Twenty-three
They did not rise too early the next morning, for the luxury of being stretched out beside her lover and not having a hundred chores to do was more than Sarah could resist.
But eventually th
ey dragged themselves downstairs for breakfast, and then went to the small and more exclusive Cross Baths. For this first occasion, she got changed into the dark brown gown which the ladies wore.
Alexander, in the men's changing rooms, was asked to put on a pair of baggy drawers and a shirt, and then he was led in by an attendant with a towel.
Sarah tried not to hover anxiously as he approached the stairs. They could of course be a bit slippery, but he got in without incident, and then she joined him.
Perched on the ledge together, they chatted about the heat and the strong smell of sulfur. Some of the more ambulatory of the people there came over to strike up their acquaintance. They introduced themselves and discussed the weather, the news from Europe, and the latest crop and share prices.
After a time, Sarah got out and went to change, while Alexander sat with a group of the young men who had all been soldiers. Unbeknownst to Alexander, a couple of them kept looking at him as though they were sure they had seen him before, but couldn't place him. He was certainly a most striking looking man with those rare tawny eyes like a panther's. They chatted amiably for some time, until one by one they got out, leaving him alone once more.
Alexander immediately began to feel better in the steaming hot waters, and told Sarah the good news as soon as she returned.
"Stay in for as long as you can then, and I shall read to you."
"Tell me about the history of this place from your guide book?"
She flicked through the pages until she found the correct place. "The Pump Room for drinking the waters was completed in 1796 by Thomas Baldwin and John Palmer. The Baths of course are ancient, built between the first and fourth centuries. The town was called Aquae Sulis, and the baths were part of a temple to the goddess Minerva. There is a fabulous Gorgon's Head, and in 1727 they also excavated part of the altar, which has a picture of Hercules and Bacchus. There is also a mastiff carrying a roe deer, a hound chasing a hare, and a depiction of the four seasons revolving around the pediment which represents Luna."
"I wish I could see it."
"You can. You can touch it all the way you touched my face, dearest."
"Not quite the same thing."
"But better than nothing."
He grinned. "And sometimes touching is indeed far better than looking."
"Behave!" she said, slapping his shoulder playfully. "Anyone could come in and hear you."
"But not before I heard them. At least my hearing has improved."
"That's something, I suppose. So let's see what nice things I can let you hear."
She opened the book of poems she had brought with her, and read some light Cavalier poetry.
"I know. You love roses, so what about 'Go, Lovely Rose!' by Edmund Waller?"
"Perfect. I think it was always one of my favorites."
Go, lovely rose!
Tell her that wastes her time, and me,
That now she knows,
When I resemble her to thee,
How sweet and fair she seems to be.
Tell her that's young,
And shuns to have her graces spied,
That hadst thou sprung
In deserts where no men abide,
Thou must have uncommended died.
Small is the worth
Of beauty from the light retired:
Bid her come forth,
Suffer her self to be desired,
And not blush so to be admired.
Then die! that she
The common fate of all things rare
May read in thee
How small a part of time they share
That are so wondrous sweet, and fair!
He kissed her hand tenderly. "I love you, Sarah," he whispered.
"I know. I love you, Alexander. Words can't even describe how I feel."
"I know. You're very good at showing me, though."
He took her hand, and she blushed as some of the other people looked at her. He kept hold of it and asked her to help him up the stairs.
"Are you sure you've had enough?"
"Any more and I shall become a prune."
She waited for him in the vestibule while he changed. Then they went to the quaint old Sally Lunn's tearooms in the North Parade. They sat in the bow window with the sun shining down and had tea and a giant bun each. He negotiated his way through the shop and the ordering process without anyone being the wiser about his blindness.
Next they went to the Abbey, which she described for him in detail.
"The church is one of the last great English pre-Reformation churches built in a consistent late Perpendicular style. The flying buttresses and West front are its most striking features. In the front is a magnificent window of seven lights flanked by turrets depicting carved ladders of angels ascending and descending. There has been a church standing here since 676. The nunnery was converted to a Benedictine monastery by King Edgar in 973 when he was crowned here. Then a Norman church was built in about 1107, but it fell into disrepair when the bishopric was moved to the town of Wells, in the southwest. This building was started in 1499, but because of the dissolution of the monasteries, it wasn't consecrated until 1616.
"The church is remarkable for its number of windows, and its fine fan tracery roof. The tomb of Beau Nash, who made Bath the town it is today, is in the south aisle."
She allowed him time to walk around the churchyard and feel the building, guiding him patiently around obstacles with an ease which surprised even her. As she watched him absorbing it all, she could barely remember a time they had not been together.
He apparently felt the same, for he took her hand or arm without an ounce of restraint, as though they fit perfectly together, completed each other in every way.
"Have you had your fill of the outside? Would you like to explore within?"
"Yes, indeed."
While they were promenading down the aisle, the organist began to rehearse. She was astonished to find that Alexander knew the names of all the pieces he performed. They sat in a pew in silence for a time, until he asked, "Do you think we can go into the organ loft?"
"We can try. The stairs are a bit steep. Just hold on to me."
He listened for a time, enraptured, as the sound filled the church.
"Do you think he might let me try?"
She patted his arm. "If you like. Let's ask."
The man was only too pleased to let him have a turn on the instrument. He stroked his hands up and down it, adjusted his feet, closed his eyes, and began.
Only a few notes told them that Alexander possessed a remarkable talent. Sarah listened in awe. His piano playing had been excellent. On the organ he was masterful.
"How did you know?"
He shook his head. "I didn't. Not really. I heard the music, and my fingers started to move."
Sarah stared at him as he sat on the bench as though completely at home.
"You found the stops and everything without ever having seen the instrument before," she commented in a low tone.
He shrugged. "I guess it's something one never forgets."
She let him play several more hymns. Soon he proclaimed himself tired, and accepted their help getting him back down to the altar safely.
They strolled back up the aisle, and once she was sure she was out of earshot, Sarah said encouragingly, "You can certainly find work anywhere in the world playing the way you do. Even out of practice you were better than that chap. I think he would love to take lessons from you."
"Do you think he knew I was blind?"
She shrugged. "He might have guessed you were poorly sighted, not wearing your glasses, perhaps, and there was your excuse about the stiff leg and back. But blind, no. He wouldn't even have suspected that with the way you played. It was like you had been doing it every day for as long as you could remember."
"Every day I seem to remember a bit more, thanks to you." He smiled, though his eyes still looked blank, haunted.
She squeezed his hand tightly, pressing
it to her breast under her cloak. "Every day I find out more about you, and grow more in love with you than ever. You're such wonderful, gentle man. I thank God every day for sending you to me."
She kissed him and giggled as she caught two older women staring. Then they looked at Alexander and smiled at the man they took to be a war hero and his blushing young bride. Lucky woman....
"What shall we do now?"
"You can stay if you like, play some more. I'm sure he won't mind."
"No, I feel like walking a bit, and after that another trip to the Baths."
"Wonderful." She hugged his arm tightly to her. "I'll get a daily paper and read to you. And I have a couple of letters Jenny forwarded here to the townhouse, though not from Jonathan."
The Rakehell Regency Romance Collection Volume 2 Page 25
