Black Curiosity - Censored!

by Melissa Dubban

  “Ben you know how I feel about that crap in the house.”

  “No, you don’t understand,” he said calmly, “I want us to maybe look at some pictures together… to jump start things in the bedroom so-to-speak.”

  And so the argument started and would continue for the whole weekend. Ben wanted them to look at dirty pictures and talk about them and hopefully have the two of them turned on enough for sex; a typical male. Carol was not pleased with the idea on the other hand. She worked damn hard to keep her body in shape and the last thing she wanted was her husband ogling some girl half his age on the computer screen and thinking about her instead of his own wife. He already spent too much time flirting with the younger women who served drinks down at the country club bar. And this was yet another reminder that her husband wanted to think about somebody else in order to be aroused.

  Of course she understood all too well the need to think about ‘other things’ in order to spur her seductive mood and perhaps that was why she hypocritically admonished Ben’s suggestion. Carol had looked at her husband’s magazines occasionally after finding his private porn stashes over the years. Secretly, they titillated her and she had masturbated to them on the rare occasion. Pictures of men and women together. Pictures of threesomes. Pictures of lesbian sex. Even the pictures of the girls by themselves as they posed for the camera and played with themselves. Each time Carol would cum and then feel terribly guilty about what she had just done or thought about.

  During their rare lovemaking she would look down at her husbands belly and pale skin and realize it just wasn’t piquing her interest. The naughty images would then creep to the forefront of her mind, tickling her libido and sending her to a fantasy world while Ben moved on top of her pumping his unremarkable manhood. It kept her entertained and her husband was none the wiser.

  After a time she would complain to Ben about the magazines and that he needed to “throw that trash out” or she would. Months or even a year would go by and she would find new magazines hidden in the garage or under the bed and the whole process would repeat. Each time she yelled at Ben, Carol secretly knew she was angry with herself as well for the perverted thoughts that crossed her mind.

  The worst afternoon came when she was feeling especially lonely and in need of company. Even her graying husband with his slowly enlarging beer belly seemed like a good option but Ben was out playing golf with business partners at the Roxburn Country Club. Carol had just finished cleaning up the foyer and was bringing some jackets into the basement when she noticed a box underneath her husband’s toolbox. A tiny corner of colored paper poked out from a rip in the side and Carol’s eye caught the pink tone of a feminine leg.

  She opened the box and found five porn magazines, all of them dog eared and clearly read. Carol was angry, having told Ben to keep these magazines out of the house so that their daughter didn’t find them. But the undeniable urge was there, building, a growing pit in her stomach and an ache between her legs. Impulsively she grabbed the top magazine and headed for the bedroom.

  It was the middle of the day and her daughter Jenny wouldn’t be home for awhile – she was spending the afternoon across the street with her friend, Sarah. Carol flipped through the first few pages of the filthy magazine and simultaneously slid her fingers into her panties. Here she was about to turn forty and she was playing with herself looking at a magazine called Finally Legal: All Girls Edition. Girls in pigtails just out of high school licking each other, sucking on each other’s tits, kissing and fondling and shoving vibrators into each other. One of them looked like her daughter’s best friend Sarah.

  Once back in school Carol’s friend Allison French-kissed her on their graduation day (while they wore their cap-n-gowns!), but nothing ever came of it and that was the end of her experiences with other women. Still, as a modern woman she found other females attractive and in weaker moments she had played with herself looking at them or thinking about them. It was naughty for her, but it was never anything she would act on or say anything about. But there was no denying at this moment how wet the picture was getting her. In fact she realized her fingers were rapidly stimulating her clit and an orgasm was building.

  It wasn’t Sarah of course. No, her nose was a little different and her freckles weren’t as pronounced. But for some reason Carol couldn’t stop looking at her. The layout featured a dark haired girl licking at the redhead’s bald pussy, fingering her, kissing her. One picture had the Sarah-look-alike with her arms pinned down by the other girl as she slipped a bright pink strap-on dildo into her teenage hole. The look on her face was one of a young woman being totally corrupted and Carol’s body jerked and spasmed violently in response. The orgasm was so intense that she screamed out loud.

  Five minutes later Jennifer came bouncing in the house with the real Sarah from across Fristelser Court, giggling about boys and school. Carol couldn’t even look at either of them. The guilt of what she had fantasized about overwhelmed her and the magazine went into the trash as she drove out to the mall. That had been two years ago and her secret masturbatory sessions ended then. Ben never found out. If he had he probably would have been quite angry that she was masturbating but not ‘putting out’ in their relationship, as he so crudely liked to call it. Carol made it a mission to purify her thoughts so she could actually look her neighbor’s daughter in the eye again.

  But Ben continued to bring that trash home. The final straw was when she found a couple of x-rated DVDs in her husband’s sock drawer. She threw them in the trash, this time without even tempting a peak. A few days later Ben confronted her, “Hey, why did you throw those DVDs away? They aren’t even mine!”

  “Whose are they?”

  “John’s. He lent them to me as a gag.” “Why do you even still hang out with him? Didn’t he move into the city?”

  “He still plays golf here, honey.” John Kinsley was their neighbor from across the way, Sarah’s father, who had moved out after divorcing his wife. He still belonged to the Roxburn Club and was the only person on its committee who didn’t actually live in Roxburn Heights. He was also Ben’s best friend.

  “Well why is he lending you porn?”

  “It’s just what guys do. I don’t understand what the big deal is. They’re just movies, Carol. And it’s not like I’m getting any action around here.”

  The argument spun out of control until he walked out the door, slamming it behind him. The topic was never brought up again and the skin magazines and movies disappeared. Carol was sure he was stashing new ones someplace she didn’t know about and after awhile she simply couldn’t be bothered to look.

  She and Alice, Sarah’s mother, spent an afternoon at the coffee shop after working out that morning and Carol complained about feeling ugly and undesirable. Alice rolled her eyes, “Well, at least you have a man in your life. John is gone and the only company I get is the naughty stories at the back of Cosmo and the trashy books. You should try to spice things up with Ben.”

  Months later, divorcee Alice had supposedly met a new boyfriend and Carol got cryptic half-tales about her man and his legendary sexual prowess. Meanwhile, her own married sex life was going nowhere and Ben was asking for them to look at x-rated pictures on the internet together. For her husband it was his attempt to figure out what made his wife tick, not to mention relieve some of his sexual tension. For Carol, it just felt wrong, like they were opening a can or worms. Still, something had to be done and she was tired of feeling un-sexy.

  “So what is this grand plan of yours again?” she asked her husband.

  Ben rolled his eyes, “It isn’t a ‘grand plan’. We just look on the internet together, talk about the things we see, play with each other a little, and then get in the mood for the bedroom.”

  “But what if I don’t want you looking at these other girls?”

  “Well, you’d be looking at other men, you know.”

  Carol thought about it and then looked to her husband, “I’ll tell you what. I want to look at the p
ictures by myself -no interruptions, no questions- and then I join you in the bedroom when I am sufficiently…you know.”

  “Warmed up?” Ben suggested.

  She chuckled, “Yes, warmed up.”

  “So I just sit in the bedroom and wait? That doesn’t seem fair.”

  “Well, according to you its ME that is never in the mood. You seem to have no problem so I think you can just relax in here. Besides, you can think about me doing naughty things out here by myself.” They chatted it over some more and finally agreed to give Carol her warm-up time.

  The first night

  The next day she asked Brian Kinsley, Alice’s son, to set up a new user account on the computer and password protect it before her husband came home from work. The eighteen year old was a skinny Irish kid with ears that stuck out a bit too far and a vapid expression on the occasions she spoke with him. There wasn’t much about him other than Carol catching him staring at her chest and flirting harmlessly (and unsuccessfully) with every girl in the Heights.

  He had offered to help her in the past with anything technical so he became the go-to geek when the computer had spyware or needed an upgrade. He wasn’t a genius but he certainly knew more than she or Ben did. When Brian asked why she wanted a separate user account, Carol lied and said she needed to do some Christmas shopping online and didn’t want Ben finding her history. The teenager showed her what to do and had the account set up in ten minutes.

  “Just pick out a password,” Brian told her, standing over the chair and holding it out for her to sit. She looked over her shoulder to see him staring down her blouse.

  Carol turned back to the screen and thought about it for a few seconds before typing in ‘trouble’. She gave her geek a ten dollar bill from her purse which he took with thanks.

  Once alone she stared at the internet browser and pondered what to do. Not really sure where to start she simply typed in SEX PICTURES into the search engine and scrolled through the various links. She was shocked at how many websites there were, how much money they asked for, how many different themes there were. Eventually she found a website that had free pictures and videos with thumbnails to entice you to click those links. One link was a brunette woman giving a blowjob to a handsome European looking man; she clicked it.

  The pictures quickly loaded across the screen as Carol watched uncomfortably. She was a little turned on, but still feeling awkward about actively seeking out pornographic pictures, but there was a certain level of comfort that the computer had firewalls and anti-virus software. Besides, she was doing this to be with her husband, to help her marriage, to help herself feel better.

  She ‘X’d out of that link and went back to the previous page with all the thumbnails. The page was actually well laid out with ‘Most Popular’ thumbnails up on top and then categorized links running along the side. She scrolled down the page and read some of the names: Straight, Lesbian, Threesome, Group, Anal, Dildos, Gangbang, etc. She remembered to bookmark the site with the name WARMUP and then shut the computer down. Ben would be home soon and she had to go shopping for some incidentals to go with dinner. Yes, with the housekeeper gone the grocery chore was annoyingly back on her list.

  *******

  Four hours later Ben was lying down in the bedroom with the door shut, waiting patiently for his wife to ‘warm-up’. She had supposedly found some naughty pictures to look at although he had his doubts. For all he knew his wife was looking for a new winter jacket or filing her nails.

  But Carol kept her promise and was back in front of the computer. Her brunette bob haircut brushed along the white robe she wore; underneath was nothing else. She glanced frequently at the bedroom door across the hall to make sure it remained closed and then slowly relaxed as she realized she would have plenty of time to shut the computer off if Ben decided to come into the room.

  Memories of her dirty masturbation sessions from the past were surfacing, but for the forty-one year old this was a new experience in many respects. Her husband had practically begged her to look at the pictures on the internet so it wasn’t like she was doing anything to betray him. It sounded strange, but in the past even her fantasies felt like some violation of her marriage vows and as such she never explored them. That was with the exception of the occasional moment of weakness with her husband’s magazines.

  The first picture she clicked on was blonde haired man licking a brunette woman’s pussy. He was well built with a wash board stomach and nice arms that held his lover tightly. His cock was rigid and lengthy and the woman was holding a ruler to it that measured him out at seven inches. “Wow,” Carol whispered to herself, amazed at his size.

  Each picture showed the attractive couple in a variety of poses in a well dressed room. She skipped through them quickly and went onto the next set – this time a threesome between two women and a man. Carol began to lightly rub her already excited clit as her eyes scanned across the images. Two women locked in a sixty-nine position as the slightly attractive male slid his dick into the girl on top. As her robe spread open, so did Carol’s legs. Her whole toned body was exposed as she fingered herself looking at the scene. She stopped.

  Quickly logging off the computer, Carol walked to the bedroom and was greeted by her husband. She didn’t speak of what she masturbated to; in fact she didn’t speak at all. The husband and wife held each other and kissed each other and soon began to make love.

  The second night

  “You are really in the mood again tonight?” Carol asked, exasperated by her husband’s constant hounding for sex.

  “Yes!” he answered, “Aren’t you? Especially after last night? We haven’t made love like that in a very long time.”

  “It was nice, but I really don’t think we need to do this every night. I’m not in the mood.”

  “Jennifer is going to be home in a week. We should take advantage of the time we have.”

  “Ben…” she whined.

  “You can always warm-up if you want…” her husband let his comments dangle in the air.

  “Do I have to?”

  “You don’t have to, but it really turns me on knowing you are out there looking at all those dirty things.”

  His wife considered the idea as her memory drifted to the previous night. The pictures had helped in that particular instance and perhaps he was right that they could help tonight.

  Twenty minutes later she was at the computer again. Ben had peaked out of the bedroom at the beginning and she quickly turned off the monitor. “No peaking or I won’t do this anymore!” she yelled at him. He couldn’t see anything from the bedroom door anyway but it was the point of the matter.

  “Fine, I won’t peak,” he grumbled, shutting the door.

  Carol went to her favorites and opened the WARMUP website once more. She needed to vary the types of things she looked at so she scanned down through the categories until she saw the word MILF. A year back one of Jennifer’s girlfriends called her that in a complimentary way and all of the teenagers got a good laugh as Carol stood there, clueless as to what the word meant.

  “Mom, it means ‘Mother I like to you-know-what’”,” Jennifer embarrassingly told her.

  “Jenny!” she snapped, “I don’t want to hear you talking like such trash. In fact all of you girls should be ashamed of using a term like that.” The topic was quickly dropped but she was smiling as she turned around and out of sight from the teenagers. It was nice to get a compliment, even if the source wasn’t her husband. It was ironic that a year later Carol sat in front of the computer looking at a whole category of porn called MILF. She clicked it.

  A page opened with some movie links, each one of them featured an attractive woman in her thirties or forties with a much younger man. Each one couldn’t have been much older than their early twenties and many of the young studs looked like they just graduated High School. That is just plain dirty! she thought to herself, closing out the page and moving onto the straight section again. But as she played with her pussy, she real
ized none of the pictures were getting her as excited as she had hoped. Impulsively she clicked back on the MILF link and watched a half dozen video clips in a row and scoured over pages of pictures. Carol’s clit was throbbing now as she thought about fucking a man half her age.

  One set of pictures had a younger girl and a younger man (both appeared to be eighteen or nineteen) getting caught by an older woman, some mother figure no doubt. As the pictures progressed, the older woman pushed the younger girl out of the bed and began to suck and fuck the young man’s cock while the daughter figure looked on jealously. A video link was conveniently located underneath the pictures and soon the same actors and actresses from the pictures were streaming across her screen. The story played out just as she thought. The eighteen year old’s mother caught her with her boyfriend and –instead of being horrified- she punished her daughter by ‘showing her how it’s done’. In her mind flashes of Jennifer’s handsome boyfriend, Phil, forced their way into her fantasy as she slipped past her clit and shoved a finger into her soaked pussy.