Let It Burn

by Dee Ellis

  I thought about that movie where the couple climbed onto the fire truck to make love. That was hot. I thought about one of the books I loved, where a hot Alpha character was so obsessed with the female heroine they fucked in a club full of people. Also incredibly hot.

  “I told him not to run you off, Charli....I’m...we’re all quite fond of you. I think of you.... well you know...I think very highly of you.” I focused on Sara’s words, noting the wetness in her bright green eyes.

  “Sara,” I heard Cage call her Sweet Sara and he wasn’t wrong, “I can’t tell you what you, what everything you’ve done for me means to me. I needed to be here, to be...somewhere else and you made it happen. I know you want to protect me....” Sara shook her head and smiled, sipping at her tea.

  “Oh no pet. I want to protect you both. The way he looks at you is the way Deacon looked...looks at Gwen. It’s what Cage was looking for, before you. I know you had such grand plans for this new chance you let yourself take here. I don’t want to deter you, either of you. It’s not my place to even...I just want both of you to be sure what you might be giving up is worth what you might gain.” Watching me with a soft look, she took a long sip of her steaming tea.

  “I know. I know, Sara.” I gave her an awkward one-armed hug, neither of us good at affection it seemed.

  Then I headed to my office, careless about planning for tomorrow’s final day with Cage. Or the new mentor, a doctor who seemed very excited about working with the kids. I should be making notes for today’s visit or tomorrows. Maybe planning next week’s sessions, as our doctor was not nearly as prepared as Cage had been. Instead, I locked my door and sank into my chair, the late afternoon filling my office with buttery light.

  Taking a deep breath, I set the book on my leather blotter. My hands shook a little as I opened it, as silly as that was. Before I read his words, I smiled as my fingertips traced them. Feeling the spots where his pen had dented the paper when he wrote harder. Smiling at a scribbled word when he changed his mind. Then I adjusted my glasses and read it.

  Charli,

  I will battle your ghosts even when you’re not ready. I’ll let you battle mine too. I been searching for you basically my whole life whether you believe it or not. Be scared. Just...be scared with me, okay, Sugar?

  I want to do this right but I know you want to shut me out. So every day until you tell me you want me too, I’ll leave you a note with something important in it. Just for you. I’m reading books because of you so you owe me the favor of reading the notes I leave you in them once I’m done. I’ll explain my book choices another day, Charli.

  Today we talked about my uncle a little. So today’s important thing:

  His name was Griffin. I think he loved Sara. I know he loved me and my sisters. He loved his job and helping people, which is one reason I love it so much too. He died saving someone because of a fluke accident. We haven’t lost any while I’ve been at 71. But, it happens. Pop’s lost a few men. Less than ten in nearly thirty years. Too many still, I know. I just...It happens, Sugar. Not often enough not to live because of it, though. Despite it.

  What else you need to know about me......

  I am 23, 24 in a few months since you know my birthday. I’ll take you in your birthday suit as my gift ;). I like pizza. You saw that today. I don’t like chocolate. I spend most my time with my sisters and my cat, Mr. Belvedere. Hope you like cats, he’s pretty much here to stay. I can cook. My mom taught me how; said I’d need it someday. I love my family and one day I might manage to make my pop proud. You might be the reason for that, actually.

  Things you think you know....

  FIRST: I am single. But I’m no saint, as I have no doubt Sara whisked you off to relay. I will tell you everything you want to know. I promise it’s not CLOSE to as bad as I bet you think. For another time, though.

  SECOND: I don’t intend to be single much longer, Sugar. I want you and you want me and once we get shit straight, that’s how it’s going to be. Like I said, you can run for a while. I’ll always chase you, baby.

  THIRD: You taste like Sugar and crisp oranges and I want more. I need more of the way your softness feels against me, more of the sounds you make when I touch you just right. More of the feel of your skin beneath mine, the smell of your hair after your shower.

  Sugar....You Have Bewitched Me, Body and Soul, Charli Dixon.

  (Not mine totally stole it from Mr. Darcy.)

  Counting my moments till tomorrow, Sugar. (Totally mine ;))

  I must have read the damn thing four times. Especially his ‘Third’ call out that had my thighs clenching and my panties ruined. Sweet Jesus. How could I possibly concentrate after that? My day wasn’t over so I had to try. The entire time I made plans for the coming week’s mentor, I was thinking about Cage.

  About his sweet, perfect, and absolutely sexy note and how it was working its magic better than he likely knew. Pride and Prejudice? I don’t even care if he read it for a class, which I learned from Sara he was still finishing up. That he read it, and called out the most perfect line for his feelings had me swooning.

  It was dark when I finally had a rough outline of the next mentoring program. We would meet Monday and, like with Cage, the Doctor would give a speech to the entire class who took the mentoring program. Miss Elderry would be there again, and the kids I had grown so close to would be mingling with others.

  Cage would be gone after tomorrow. Which brought a sharp pain into my chest. Not seeing him every day like I had this week wasn’t something I was ready for. Then again, according to that note, he had no intention of letting me get away that easy. So for now my focus had to shift to my program and making it work for these kids.

  Hopefully Dr. Patel could arrange for a tour of the clinic he worked at, I thought a hospital might have too many variables. If so we could do a visit like we had to the fire house. I also hoped he could have some nurses and maybe PA’s take time to discuss other fields with the kids.

  Hopefully we had a better turnout than Cage’s class had. Then again, being able to work so closely with the kids had been to their benefit, I think. I doubt Devon would have been so open had he been competing for time with a bunch of others. I was proud of him, and hoped he followed through.

  After calling goodnight to Sara, the two of us sharing a long look of understanding, I headed out. Sara knew it was likely too late for me. Not as if considering Cage as an option to let into my life was some great tragedy. We both knew the risks, though. Now that I knew a little about her relationship Cage’s uncle, I thought maybe I understood her better than she knew.

  She once mentioned a loss back home in Ireland too, but it was more painful I thought than any I had known. My loss cut me deep but it would heal as soon as I let it go. Climbing into my truck and leaving my parents’ place, the bakery, that awful town, had been my first step. Making myself flourish here, taking this job and that cottage and maybe, just maybe growing close to Cage were the next ones.

  The breezy, sunny day had chilled and I wished for the light leather jacket I left back at my office. I clutched the note Cage had left me in a new book. Sitting in my office, my fingertips the faintest blue from tracing over his handwriting, I wrote my own note.

  It was now tucked away in Emma, and when I saw him next he would get both the amazing book and my own little note. I smirked and noticed I was all but racing home in the breezy darkening night.

  On the way I stopped at the corner bodega to grab some groceries since my fridge was empty. Picking up some bottled water, things to make a salad and some steaks that I picked up and put back twice, I headed to check out.

  “Evening, Georgie.” I call politely to the owner, Jorge; he’s a nice man in his fifties who likes to talk about football with me.

  “Evening Miss Charli,” He offers a crooked, toothy grin, “wine to go with your dinner, tonight?”

  “You know what, yes. How about some moscato?” Even though the night is crisp, I think making a meal and sitting
on the back patio sounds amazing.

  “You got it Miss Charli. Enjoying the preseason?” He rang me up, carefully bagging the wine and veggies.

  “Absolutely,” We share a smile because my team just beat his in the second preseason game, “kind of doubt you are though, Georgie. Maybe next time though? Have a good night my friend.” I back out of the swinging door with a smile and a wave, like I was taught back home.

  Back home you had to greet everyone with a smile and a hello. Hell if you passed Widow Jenkins and didn’t ask her how church had been, she hit you with her bag. It was refreshing, freeing almost, to blend in with faces I didn’t know and who couldn’t give a shit about knowing me.

  The anonymity was new and I was embracing it. Another reason Cage rattled my cages. Hah, no pun intended. Because another reason I chose Chicago was because I could get lost and hopefully stay lost here. Instead, the first day I venture out for real, the man notices me somehow. Now I can’t shake him and I don’t know if I want to.

  I reach into my bag and touch the book with my note for him. When a bum grasps my ankles, I also grab my mace. A gift from my brother Colton. I drop some dollar bills into his hand and he lets me go. Then I move on again, just that easily. No need to offer more, and really he doesn’t expect it.

  It’s all taken some adjusting because while I’m trying to fade away into the crowds, truth be told the bustling streets make me nervous. I never dealt well with people looking at me, or listening to me. Not when I took debate or when I stood beside Tucker for homecoming court. I felt trapped by eyes and questions and expectations back home so I panicked when I felt closed in on.

  Cage had noticed this that day we visited the fire house. Right away he had picked up on my unease and stuck close to me. It had only been my second day out and about in the city. I had stayed locked up in that dive hotel until I moved into the cottage.

  That day on the corner, crowded by midafternoon commuters and people on breaks, I had started to panic. Then he had touched me, pressing a hand to my back and I had calmed almost instantly. I felt him move close, his easy smile and the way his eyes held mine making my anxiety seem silly.

  Then he promised to stick with me and he had. I had gone to absolute goo just about everywhere. Especially between my legs until I was almost ashamed. Almost.

  When I was just a few blocks from the cottage, having carefully made my way through the mid-evening commuters, I thought I heard my name called. It’s a fairly common name, though not for a woman.

  Ignoring it as a coincidence, I apologized to another unfortunate soul because I was out of cash. While I was pausing to search for some change, I heard it again. Spinning with a frown at being bothered, I nearly dropped my groceries.

  A fire truck was coasting down the crowded street beside me. Cage was standing on the edge of it, Finn smirking down from beside him. The truck barely slowed and Cage, bright eyed and those dimples flashing, leapt down and crossed the sidewalk towards me.

  “Cage! What....are you...that was foolish!” It hadn’t been really; the truck was barely doing fifteen miles in the busy traffic.

  “Hey, Sugar,” He towered over me and I bloomed with warmth, “couldn’t pass up the coincidence someone thought kind enough to give me.” Cage twisted at the waist, waving at the truck and I just stared at him.

  “Meaning what, exactly?” Despite my chilly behavior towards him earlier, Cage was as warm and charming as ever. The jerk.

  Cage was still in his gear, or at least most of it. He wore the blue shirt with his fire station stamped on the back, the soft fabric sculpting to his massive shoulders and trim waist. I could barely see heavy boots beneath the sagging yellow protective pants he wore. They hung low on his hips, held up by black suspenders that I felt an overwhelming urge to see him in sans shirt.

  A brief flash of him with those pants around his knees, thrusting into me as I gripped the thick suspenders left me hot and achy all over. He looked like he belonged on one of those firemen of the month calendars. I’d buy one.

  “Chance to be a gentleman and walk you home. I’m pretending that’s why I leapt off a moving fire truck, for the sake of chivalry, Sugar. Now, give me that.” Before I could object, he took the bag with my groceries and started walking.

  “Cage,” I stood rooted to my spot, biting back a grin at his persistence, “who says I need walking home? It’s four blocks away.” Cage turned to face me, taking a few steps backwards as he answered.

  “Well I say so, of course. I care about your safety, you know? I will see you home safe. Carry your groceries, even put them away and cook dinner if you want. Kiss you again if you act right. I am at your service, Sugar.” He winked and I threw my head back and laughed.

  “Oh you are? What precisely does that entail?” Cage’s face darkened and made something coil in my belly.

  “Anything. You. Ask.” Slowly his eyes trailed over me and I felt the look between my legs, as if he had reached out and touched me there.

  “Is that so? What if I ask you to fix my sink because it drips? While I maybe make us dinner?” Where my boldness was coming from, I had no idea.

  “Abso-fuckin-lutely, baby. And desert?” Cage drug his tongue over his bottom lip, eyes focused on my face and I was wet instantly.

  “Perhaps. Now...get me home like a gentleman, first, you randy fuck.” Cage threw his head back and laughed, deep and throaty and I loved it. Maybe loved him.

  “Outstanding. Come on, Sugar. Not safe for you without me on these streets.” Cage tipped his head and I caught up to him, falling into step beside him.

  We were quite as we walked, Cage slowing his long legged stride so I could keep up with him. I liked that he was big and solid because I felt safe with him. While I hadn’t felt truly unsafe here, it wasn’t the same as actually feeling safe. Having no doubt I had nothing to worry about. Cage wouldn’t let something or someone hurt me.

  Not physically of course. Not that he could stop the damage he might ultimately do to my heart. To my soul. Because I knew it all belonged to him without my ever voicing it. Without my actually being ready to agree to it at all.

  I just hoped he dealt with it carefully because I hadn’t meant to give it away. Hadn’t known when I stepped into that library, my future was already waiting for me.

  “Where you at, beautiful?” Cage asked softly from beside me, his warm breath flushing my cheek.

  “Hmm? Thinking. Stuff. Things. You toss compliments out so easily. I reckon it’s because you use them frequently. With many women. Lots.” I didn’t know if I really believed that; and I didn’t know how much it mattered if I did.

  “Hey,” Cage paused and reached out to yank at my wrist, “not true. Look...when you want details, they’re yours. I’m not proud of parts of my truth. Charli, my truth is yours when you want it though.” His hand slid up to cup my neck, thumb at my jaw, forcing my gaze to his.

  “Truth? Anything I ask you, when and if I get there,” I cautioned and he just smiled because that too was a lie, “you promise you won’t hold out? I may not like it. I can take it though.” My chin lifted and his dimple came out as he grinned.

  “Anything. You ask, I tell. When you get there. I don’t want a single thing between us, Charli. One thing though,” His words forced me to focus on his and my face flushed with the intensity I found there, “the pretty things I say to you are only for you. They are part of my truths and I don’t say them half as often as I think them. As I feel them. Not half as often as you deserve them, baby. I’ll fix that, though.” His head tipped close and his breath was hot at my mouth but I wasn’t ready so I dipped my head.

  “Do....I mean...you think men like pretty words too, Cage?” I watched his Adams apple bob as he swallowed; even that was sexy to me.

  “Mmm, Charli,” His lips whispered against my temple, “You think pretty words about me, Sugar?” I tipped my head back at the dubious question in his voice; how could he doubt how beautiful he was?

  “If I did,” My
eyes lowered to his mouth because I wanted to kiss him, wanted to be the one claiming him, “would you like me to share? Seems only fair, right?” I didn’t know why I felt so brave with him. Felt amazing.

  “Fuck yes I would.” His skin flushed a little and I laughed, pressing my lips to the dimple that drove me crazy.

  “This right here,” I whispered against the dimple, “you kind of had me the first time you used this thing on me, Cage Cooper. But, really,” I dipped away and stared up into his eyes, “It’s your eyes. Your eyes are fucking beautiful.” Cage groaned and the crinkle of the bag was the only warning I had.

  Then he had one arm around my waist, hauling me tight against him and he was kissing me. Devouring was a better word for it. His tongue slipped past my open lips, because I was ready and waiting this time. I wanted his taste and I wanted it to consume me and flood my senses. Like everything about him did.

  I whimpered when his tongue stroked mine, his teeth nipping at my bottom lip. My hands were tangled in his thick hair and I lifted on my toes to press closer. I needed to be closer. Heat pooled between my thighs and I pressed my hips to his, feeling his thick erection through his gear. The arm wrapped around my waist moved, one hand slipping to grip a handful of my backside and haul me closer.

  “You’re not letting me remain a gentleman, baby. You can tell me pretty words all you want though. Coming from you,” His mouth softly, briefly, drug over mine once more, “they hit in me in all the places that matter, Sugar.” I let out a sound of agreement before licking at his bottom lip.

  “I’ll keep that in mind, Cage.” He set me back down, the bag crinkling again and I hoped we hadn’t ruined dinner.

  We kept our distance the rest of the way, though I know it was a struggle for us both. When I let us inside, Cage headed right for the kitchen and I had to remind myself he knew the house well. For a moment I stood watching him as he set the bag on the island. Imagined this was normal, how my life was.