by M. Sembera
I squeezed Hert’s hand before letting it go and walking toward Erin.
Placing my hand on her shoulder, I sympathized, “I’m so sorry.”
Erin’s tone was flat as she cleared her throat and replied, “Well dear, these things happen.”
Unable to believe she truly felt that way, I asked, “Is there anything I can do?”
She laid her hand on top of mine saying, “No dear.”
Then turning to Hert she requested, “Can you take me back to the house? Rennillia can stay here with Emerson until you get back.”
Hert replied, “Yes ma’am,” before turning to me and saying, “I’ll be back, okay.”
I nodded at him and stood there until I couldn’t see them anymore.
Slowly walking over to Emerson I wasn’t sure what to do. After standing next to him for a moment, I took his hand.
“Em, come on, let’s go sit down,” I suggested.
We walked to a small waiting room and sat down. I sat as close to him as the chair would allow watching him stare at the floor.
Wrapping my arm around him, I urged, “Talk to me.”
Hanging his head, Emerson stated, “I was never the man my father wanted me to be and now it’s too late.”
I wanted to cry but I didn’t. Sliding off my chair, I knelt down in front of him.
Grabbing his hands, I said, “Em it’s going to be okay.”
Emerson quickly stood up pulling me with him.
His eyes burned into mine as he held onto me saying, “It must be nice Ren, always doing whatever you want. Always getting your way. Is it working for you? Are you finally getting everything you wanted?”
Stunned, I breathed, “What?”
He let go of my hands slightly shoving me back.
Being persistent, I moved toward him again saying, “Em stop it. You know I…”
He cut me off. Grabbing the front of my shirt, Emerson leaned down eye level with me.
“You what? What are you going to say that you haven’t said a thousand times and it doesn’t change a damn thing?” he barked.
Frantically searching his eyes with mine, I suggested, “Okay. Okay, Em just calm down.”
Narrowing his eyes Emerson questioned, “Or what?”
Jackson’s voice came from behind me shouting, “Roberts! What the hell are you doing?”
Em let go pushing me out of the way. Jackson rushed up shoving him, knocking Em back against the chairs. Jumping right back up, Emerson swung, punching Jackson in the jaw. Trying my best to stop them I pulled on Jackson from behind.
I was screaming, “Stop…Stop it! He’s just upset! Stop!”
Jackson swung his arm knocking me out of the way. Hitting the ground hard I started to cry as they continued to hit each other. Scrambling to my feet I ran to the door to go get help. I couldn’t find anyone. Then I saw Hert coming down the hallway.
Immediately, I started hollering, “Hert! They’re fighting! Hert!”
Running into the room Hert grabbed Jackson off of Emerson and shoved Emerson onto the wall holding him there.
Jackson started to head back towards Em as I grabbed is arm, stressing, “Stop Jacks. He’s just upset. Let it go.”
Yanking his arm away from me, Jackson walked out of the room. Emerson struggled to break free from Hert.
Hert ordered, “Renni go get Jackson and have him take you home, Mrs. Roberts is there by herself.”
I started to question him, “But…”
He didn’t let me finish, shouting, “Now!”
I didn’t say anything else quickly leaving the room.
Scanning the hallways as I rushed out of the hospital, I looked for Jackson. Finally finding him outside in the parking lot, I ran over to him.
“Jackson,” I blurted.
As he turned towards me I gasped. His face was bloody and already swollen. The stitches were no longer holding the cut above his eye closed.
“Give me your keys I’m taking you to Dr. Chepelli. Get in the car,” I demanded.
Silently Jackson did what he was told.
Trying to concentrate on the road, I asked, “Are you alright?”
At first he answered, “Yea,” then quickly changing his mind, he said, “You know what? No. I’m not okay.”
In an effort to make him feel better, I shared, “Em’s just upset. His father just died and now he’s responsible for everything. It’s hard for him.”
“What? No he’s not!” he snapped at me.
Shaking my head, I asked, “He’s not upset?”
Jackson answered, “I’m sure he is. That’s not what I was talking about.”
I questioned further, “Then what are you talking about?”
He glared at me saying, “You don’t know?”
Keeping my eyes on the road, I shook my head.
In a smug voice he explained, “It’s not Roberts.”
Confused, I asked, “If he’s not taking over then who is?”
Jackson glared at me as I started shaking my head at him.
Pulling into the parking lot of Dr. Chepelli’s office, I parked the car.
Turning to him, I shouted, “No! Emerson is over everything now that Mr. Roberts is gone.”
Jackson shook his head correcting, “Ren, no he’s not. Now that Mr. Roberts is gone, there’s only one person who can take over.”
Every single hope I had for the future evaporated. Now understanding what Emerson meant when he said it was too late. My heart sunk. Everything was falling apart. Mr. Roberts was gone. Erin was clearly devastated losing her husband and the love of her life. Emerson was sad and clearly angry. Jackson and Em had actually fought. Hert, as always, was there to set things right. He would be hurting too not only for the loss of Mr. Roberts but I knew he didn’t like to break his promises and now there was no way around it. We weren’t getting out that easily or at all for that matter.
Chapter 22
After our stop at the doctor’s office, Jackson and I arrived back at the house. I looked around noticing the mess from the events that transpired earlier in the day.
Sure it was the right thing, I told Jacks, “Stay down here in the kitchen until I see where Erin’s at.”
He didn’t respond as he sat down at the kitchen table. Walking out of the kitchen, I headed upstairs.
Hearing Erin in her room, I knocked on the door.
“Come in,” she said in a weakened voice.
Once inside her room, I noticed she was packing.
“Erin, are you leaving?” I asked.
She chattered back, “There is so much to tend to dear. I might as well get started now.”
In an effort to be helpful, I suggested, “You don’t have to do anything right now. Maybe you should…”
For the first time ever, Erin snapped at me, “We all don’t get the luxury of doing whatever we want. Some of us have obligations.”
Feeling the sting of her comment, I softly said, “Yes ma’am,” and started to leave the room.
Erin stopped me saying, “Rennillia dear, come sit down.”
Shocked at how quickly she had switched her tone back, I sat down in a chair beside the bed.
Erin sat on the edge of the bed and I could see tears welling up in her eyes. Sitting there quietly, I assumed a ‘speak when spoken to’ policy was in order.
Her voice was shaky as she spoke, “I was a lot like you a long time ago. Determined to have my way, thinking I could change things. Sometimes you have to make hard decisions, decisions that hurt. You make these decisions even though they are painful because ultimately there is no other alternative.”
Wanting her to clarify the decision, I fought the urge to interrupt, allowing her to continue.
“I know your decision with Sophia was a difficult one, and as you know it was the right one,” she imparted.
Swallowing hard, I nodded with the realization Erin and Mr. Roberts had known all along.
Following my acknowledgement of the facts, she continued, “I fe
ll in love with Mason the moment I saw him. He was nothing like the other boys I knew, smart, driven and just as stubborn as I was. We constantly fought over who would have their way. Not long before Emerson was born, I found out Mason had an affair. She was married also and ended up pregnant. I was devastated but I realized I was not completely blameless either. I loved Mason and was four months pregnant with my son. I decided a life with Mason was what I really wanted and I would make things work however I had to. It was a difficult decision. It was also the right one.”
Unable to fully grasp her story I questioned, “So what happened to the other lady?”
Vague in detail, she stated, “She had her baby and her husband did not find out until years later. He was a horrible man. Mason has always helped them and he made sure she will still be taken care of even now that he’s gone. I never particularly cared for her under the circumstances, however, her life was terrible and she still suffers today.”
Standing back up, Erin finished by saying, “Until right now, only a few people knew and two of them have passed away, I would like to keep it that way. If you don’t mind dear I would prefer to be alone.”
Nodding to her I stood up and left the room.
It was unbelievable that she had carried this secret around all these years. They must have been so careful making sure no one found out. Understanding why she felt she could tell me, I was still confused as to why she told me. Mulling the story over and over in my head I walked down the stairs and back into the kitchen. Jackson was still at the table resting his head in his arms that were folded in front of him.
Walking up next to him, I patted his shoulder asking, “Are you okay?”
Keeping his voice low, he replied, “Yea, head hurts though.”
“Why don’t you go lay down in Sophia’s room until Hert gets back,” I offered.
Slowly standing up, he walked out of the kitchen without saying a word.
Taking a deep breath, I started straightening up the living room. Still thinking of Erin’s confession, I speculated on her reasoning behind telling me. It was possible with Mr. Roberts gone she needed someone to share her secret with. Another possibility was now that Hert was taking over; she felt it was her duty to impart words of wisdom concerning decisions. Perhaps it was for Emerson’s benefit, in case something happened to her also; someone would know he had a sibling out there.
Hert and Emerson made it back to the house right after I finished straightening up. Emerson stayed in the kitchen while Hert joined me in the living room.
Checking on Em, I asked Hert, “How’s he doing?”
“Alright I guess,” he answered.
Rapping my arms around him I asked, “And how are you?”
Hert leaned down kissed my forehead and replied, “Fine I guess. It’s strange you know. It happened so fast.”
Resting my head on his chest, I tightened my hold on him.
Placing his arms around my shoulders Hert asked, “What about you?”
Shrugging a little, I said, “I don’t really know, sad for Erin and Em I guess.”
Letting go of me, Hert sat down on the couch.
Rubbing is hand against his forehead Hert informed, “Jackson’s mom offered to keep Sophia overnight, she said she’ll bring her back in the morning. I told her yes, I hope you’re okay with that.”
Nodding at him, I replied, “That was nice of her. Its probably better considering what happened earlier.”
“That’s what I thought too,” he agreed before asking, “Are you going back to the hotel today?”
Giving a slight smile, I shook my head answering, “Nope.”
Hert gave me a funny look, questioning, “I thought you weren’t coming back here? And what about those houses?”
Sitting down next to him, I explained, “Well, I know you need to be here so I thought I’d make things easier on you for a change.”
Shaking his head and slightly laughing, he said, “It’s about time.”
Making a face at him, I said, “Just enjoy it while it lasts.”
After we both laughed, I remembered Jackson was upstairs. Unsure of how to handle the situation of he and Emerson, I turned to Hert.
“Hey I told Jackson he could go lay down in Sophia’s room. His head was hurting. You know we had to make a stop at the doctor’s office to have his head stitched back up. I don’t want them fighting again,” I shared, hoping Hert would know what to do.
Hert replied, “I think it will be okay and Roberts is pretty black and blue. Jackson definitely got some good hits in too.”
Rolling my eyes and shaking my head at the thought of Hert’s enthusiasm surrounding their fight, I changed the subject.
“Can you take me to go get my stuff from the hotel?” I asked.
Hert replied, “Sure. I need to go visit my mother since I will not be able to go on Friday.”
I stood up and said, “I’m going to change my clothes and then we can go.”
Hert smiled at me as I headed upstairs.
Chapter 23
After picking my belongings up from the hotel, we headed to the institution. I didn’t feel sad leaving the little town I had fallen so in love with. I had spent so much time dwelling on the past and hoping for a better future that I was neglecting my present obligations. With Sophia away for the night I decided to start by making sure my husband had a reliable wife.
I looked at Hert saying, “I think we should buy a piece of property in that little town.”
Glancing at me he said, “Oh, you do?”
Nodding, I continued, “Yea, it is so nice there. I thought maybe one day we could build a house on it and retire there.”
Hert reached over taking my hand, gently rubbing his thumb back and forth against my wrist.
Pulling into the institution, we parked the car. Hert held my hand as we walked to the entrance.
Curious, I asked, “Hey, did your mother know Mr. Roberts?”
Hert stopped for a second thinking before he answered, “I’m pretty sure they were in school together. I don’t think they really knew each other though. Why?”
I replied, “I just don’t want her to have anything else to be sad about.”
Scowling at my comment, Hert stated, “My father never let her have friends, I mean besides your parents and to be honest I don’t think she feels anything anymore anyway.”
Taking the elevator to the second floor, I put my arm around him. Silently trying to comfort him, I knew thinking about his father upset him. The doors opened and we sat in our usual spot waiting for them to wheel her in. When I saw her, I smiled always hoping for a reaction from her.
Stone faced and glassy eyed as always she stated, “Today is not Friday.”
Apologizing, I said, “Yes ma’am I know. I’m sorry.”
Hert immediately took charge of the conversation, “We can’t come Friday.”
Ms. Herterand questioned in her toneless voice, “Why not?”
There was a pause and I looked at Hert wondering if was going to tell her the truth.
He answered her saying, “We have a funeral to go to on Friday. Otherwise we would have come then.”
I could hear the frustration building in his voice as he added, “We will only come on Fridays from now on.”
She coldly replied, “I would appreciate that.”
Placing my hand on Hert’s arm I asked her, “How are you doing?”
Staring through me, she stated, “Well, whose funeral?”
Before I could distinguish whether she was saying she was well and asking about the funeral or just plain asking about the funeral Hert answered.
“Mr. Roberts had an aneurysm. He died this afternoon,” he informed.
Ms. Herterand started blinking and clearing her throat. It was very disturbing.
As she repeatedly cleared her throat, I told Hert, “Go get a glass of water.”
Hert quickly left to get her a glass of water.
I reached my hand out to her and she grabbed my
wrist. Still frantically blinking and clearing her throat she appeared to be having some kind of episode. Trying to calm her I placed my other hand over her hand that was clutching my wrist so hard it was starting to burn.
Leaning forward I encouraged, “Breathe. It’s okay…Just breathe…”
It didn’t help and she started to jerk along with the blinking and throat clearing. Hert and the orderlies rushed over. I was thankful when they gave her a shot and she loosened her grip on my wrist. Her blinking slowed until her eyes remained closed and the throat clearing lessened into a low gurgle.
I sat there stunned watching her being wheeled away. A memory flashed in the back of my mind, when Em first brought me back to the house, of all my episodes. Glancing down I noticed my wrist was swollen, turning purple and speckled with little red spots.
Hert walked back to me after talking to the attendant saying, “She’s going to be ok. She hasn’t had an episode in a long time. I think from now on if we can’t make it here on a Friday, we will just have to skip.”
Confused by his logic, I asked, “You really think that’s what sent her into a fit?”
Explaining he said, “I think it was a combination of things. We came on the wrong day and then the whole funeral thing. Renni, my mother is very unstable.”
Nodding at him I stood up.
Feeling shaky, I asked, “Can we pick up something to eat on the way home. I haven’t eaten anything today.”
Hert put his arm around me saying, “Sure we’ll get food for everybody,” as we left the institution.
After making a stop to pick up food we arrived back home. Emerson was still in the kitchen.
Hert placed the bags on the table and said, “I’m going to check on Mrs. Roberts and Jackson.”
I smiled at him, giving a slight nod. Hungry enough to be slightly nauseous, I didn’t wait on Hert to come back down.
Grabbing my burger out of the bag, I looked at Emerson asking, “Do you want one?”
As Em shook his head I noticed Hert was right, Jackson did get some good hits in.
Feeling compassionate, I asked, “Do you want to talk?”
Emerson answered, “What is there to talk about? Doesn’t change anything.”
