The Rennillia Series: Volumes 1-5

by M. Sembera

  “What? No! Just…Watch your movie,” I fussed.

  Carefully lifting Ailin off of my lap, I gently laid him back down. Out of all the people I had explained my relationship with Jackson to, defending myself to a seven year old was unimaginable. As I got up and hurried out of the den, I couldn’t believe these boys. When Hert and I were their age, we were still trying to see who could punch the hardest.

  Stepping into Jackson’s old room, I checked on Sophia before walking to the kitchen to see who was on the phone. Jackson was leaning against the counter. My first thought was that something happened to William.

  “Who was that?” I carefully asked.

  Glancing at me, he replied, “Hert.”

  Relieved at first, I started to worry when I noticed his irritated expression.

  “I can’t stay at the house anymore,” he shared.

  Outraged, I assured, “Hert’s not going to decide that, it’s my house too and if he thinks…” before Jacks stopped me, saying, “He didn’t say that. I’m telling you, I can’t be under the same roof with them.”

  Nodding, I said, “Okay.”

  Shaking his head at me, he asked, “How could you believe it was Hert?”

  “Wait, now you’re upset with me?” I questioned.

  Appearing frustrated, Jackson replied, “I’m just…mad, I mean… He never… I’m the one… He knew exactly what your father was doing to you and he never did anything. And with everything else, still you want to defend him?”

  Instantly defensive, I informed, “Jackson, I didn’t meet you until I was seventeen. I was almost sixteen when I met Em. Do you know who I had before that?” Stopping to take a breath, I continued, saying, “We didn’t have family like you do and I knew what his father did to him, I never did anything. Believe me, his was worse. I don’t care if he never rescued me, I didn’t need anybody to. I needed a friend and for the first fifteen years of my life…it was only him.”

  Before Jackson had a chance to respond, we heard a loud ‘ouch’. Braden walked into the kitchen rubbing his arm. I looked at Jackson and sighed. His disposition proved he still didn’t understand and as sad as it was, I was glad I had decided against anything other than friendship with him.

  Holding out his arm, Braden whined, “Auggie pinched me.”

  Auggie walked in giving him a little shove and griping, “I told him to get his feet off me.”

  I heard Penny start to cry, then Ailin and then Sophia. Walking out of the kitchen, I left Jackson to deal with them, while I tried to get the other three back to sleep.

  We ended up back in the den, with two fighting boys, a whiny three year old and two screaming girls. Trading off the girls and separating the boys, it took what seemed like forever to get them all settled down. When it was all said and done, I was on the couch with Penny in my arms and Ailin snuggled up at my side. Jackson sat leaned up against the front of the couch, holding Sophia with Auggie on one side of him and Braden on the other.

  Chapter 6

  Careful not to move, when I woke, it took me a moment to recall the seven of us were all in the same positions we had fallen asleep in. Even though the kids were pretty much a terror the night before, having them all sound asleep was kind of precious. All in all, it wasn’t a bad way to wake up in the morning. As I laid there watching Jackson holding Sophia, I thought about Emerson’s confession. It was hard for me to believe Hert wanted to come after me at first. Then it dawned on me. I wanted to believe it. Deep down, I knew, I always wanted Hert to be someone he wasn’t. Now, I knew exactly who I wanted him to be but I couldn’t have him either. Realizing that I always found Jackson to be a little selfish, really it was me that was. He would have a wife and kids by now if it weren’t for me. He wouldn’t be upset or betrayed by people close to him and he never would have read the things in his file. If I hadn’t insisted we be friends when I broke up with him, he would be happy right now.

  Sophia started to wake up. Smiling at her the moment she caught sight of me, I watched her start to squirm. Pulling against Jackson to climb over his shoulder, she smiled wide.

  Patting her back, Jackson whispered, “Let your mama sleep.”

  “I’m awake,” I shared before saying, “I need to get up.”

  Looking over his shoulder at me, he asked, “Need some help?”

  Nodding, I watched him stand up. Setting Sophia on the couch, he carefully lifted Penny off of me. Reaching my hands under Ailin, I slowly moved him away from my side. I stood up and scooped Sophia into my arms, hugging her tight before carrying her to Jackson’s old room. The second I finished getting Sophia changed and dressed, Jackson walked in.

  “I got another one for you,” Jackson said holding Penny out to me.

  With a light smile, I set Sophia down in the crib and took Penny from him, asking, “What do you want for breakfast?”

  Jackson picked Sophia up out of the crib as he informed, “I’m making waffles.”

  Before I could question him making breakfast, he was out of the room with Sophia.

  After Penny was changed and dressed, I brought her into the kitchen. All three boys were sitting at the table. Jackson was standing at the counter holding Sophia. As I placed Penny in her highchair, I noticed a box of waffles next to the toaster.

  Laughing a little, I said, “Oh, you cheater. That’s not making waffles.”

  Handing Sophia to me, he defended, “Don’t be mad 'cause I’m smart enough to work around actually cooking.”

  Placing Sophia into the other highchair, I said, “Alright smart guy, hand me some plates.”

  I set the table and helped pass out waffles before we all sat down to eat.

  Auggie seemed to be less of a pain today and he even carried Ailin to the bathroom after I told them to go brush their teeth. We put the girls in the playpen before heading back to the kitchen to clean up.

  As I washed the dishes, I admitted, “The waffles were pretty good.”

  Smiling wide, Jackson questioned, “Is that a compliment about my fake cooking?”

  Rolling my eyes, I stuck my tongue out at him, saying, “It’s a definite step up from cereal.”

  Changing the subject, Jackson said, “You know for someone who isn’t from a big family, you are good with the kids.”

  Laughing, I shared, “Please, Sarah should get a medal for handling them every day. I never realized how easy I have it with Sophia.”

  “With everything you have going on, you should catch a break somewhere,” he laughed.

  As our laughter faded, I noticed although Jackson was cheerful, he wasn’t his usual self.

  Taking a breath, I asked, “Are we okay?”

  Nodding, he answered, “Sure.”

  Setting the dish rag down in the sink, I turned to him, saying, “Jackson, look at me.”

  Focused on the plate he was drying, he shook his head.

  Placing my hand on his arm, I questioned, “Hert and Em aren’t the only reason you’re not coming back to the house are they?”

  Jackson stood there for a moment before setting the plate in the cabinet.

  Wrapping his arms around me, he leaned to my ear whispering, “I want to kiss you.”

  Slowly closing my eyes, I hugged him tight.

  A momentary flash of ‘what are you waiting for’ crossed my mind before I reminded myself that it was wrong. Not because I was married, although that was a good enough reason, I just couldn’t in good conscience lead him on. I couldn’t let him kiss me. As bad as things were now, with the four of us, I knew they were fixing to get even worse. Jackson should be waking up in a pile of his own kids, with a good little wife that deserved how good he would be to her. Not wasting his life on my impossible situation.

  Pulling away, I looked into his eyes and shook my head. I could feel his hold on me tighten as I quickly realized he was going to do it anyway. Thinking I should stop him, I couldn’t bring myself to say a word. As warmth spread through my chest, I started to relax. He was going to kiss me and I was
going to let him, until I heard the front door.

  “Your parents are back,” I quietly informed.

  Quickly letting go, Jackson sighed and started drying the dishes again.

  Mrs. Thomas seemed impressed at how calm the kids were when they returned before asking if I could stay with them again. After explaining, I had plans to visit Ms. Herterand and then a doctor’s appointment, I agreed to come back. Jackson told me to take his car and asked me to bring his bag when I came back. I was already starting to miss Jacks, just thinking about him not returning to the house. Spending almost three weeks nonstop with him, it was hard to imagine not seeing him every day. The more I thought about it on the way back to the house, the more I realized he was making the right decision. There was no doubt in my mind that Jackson would return to work at JPT Financial, when this was over. Starting to feel a little more at ease about it, I decided he would be able to move on.

  Walking into the kitchen, I saw Hert sitting at the table. The second he saw me he stood up.

  “You’re back,” he stated, sounding a bit surprised.

  Nodding, I shared, “Yea, I need to take a shower and change before I go see your mother.”

  “Are you coming back after that?” he questioned.

  Shaking my head, I answered, “Mrs. Thomas needs me to come back. Gus’ little boy is doing better but Mr. Thomas had to go into work and Sarah wants her to go back up to the hospital.”

  With a serious expression, Hert asked, “What about tonight?”

  Shrugging, I replied, “I think I’ll pack a bag just in case I stay again but she didn’t say how long she needed me to watch the kids.”

  “You’re staying to watch the kids?” he questioned.

  I found myself starting to smile as I recounted, “Yea, last night was crazy with Gus’ four and Sophia. Penny isn’t as good as Sophia but it’s so neat watching them play together. They really just make noises and stuff but it looks like they’re having conversations. Auggie and Braden kept fighting and that Auggie is pretty much a smart ass and Braden is a nosy little thing but Ailin is so adorable. This morning they all…” Stopping, I noticed a ‘why are you telling me this’ expression on Hert’s face before I said, “Anyway, I’m gonna go get ready.”

  Before I made it to the stairs Hert stopped me, saying, “I thought you would be upset.”

  It took a minute for me to realize what Hert was talking about.

  “It’s already over what would be the point,” I assured.

  Hert’s voice was strained as he said, “I just…”

  Turning to face him, I thought he might genuinely be sorry.

  “Now that you know the control you have, I don’t want you to get so mad that you…” he started before I stopped him, saying, “Not that you hurt me.”

  Shaking my head at him, I stated, “Go to work Hert,” before heading upstairs.

  My visit with Ms. Herterand was nice but a little strange. She seemed preoccupied and I knew I was. I managed to ask about Dr. Chepelli without directly questioning whether or not he was trustworthy. By the time our visit was over, I was ready to get my appointment with Dr. Chepelli over and get back to the kids.

  Slightly confused when the nurse directed me to Dr. Chepelli’s office instead of an examination room, I sat there waiting.

  It wasn’t long before I heard a polite, “Mrs. Herterand,” before the door shut.

  Smiling, I watched him walk behind his desk and take a seat.

  “How are you feeling?” he questioned.

  Nodding, I assured, “Good, I have been making sure I eat, breakfast, lunch and dinner.”

  “And how is Mr. Roberts? Is he experiencing any pain?” he asked.

  Shrugging slightly, I replied, “I don’t believe so.”

  “I will spare you the lecture concerning how Mr. Roberts ended up in that condition, however, Ms. Herterand requested I have a conversation with you regarding your situation,” he informed.

  Instantly on edge, I stared at him, wondering why Ms. Herterand was having him talk to me, seeing as I just left the institution.

  Dr. Chepelli leaned forward slightly before offering, “You have quite the situation, going on,” as I nodded he continued, saying, “I have known Ms. Herterand for many years. She is very dear to me so I hope that you understand, although I am willing to follow through with her request, the moment I feel any of this will cause harm to her, I will no longer participate.”

  “Yes sir,” I agreed.

  Glancing up before speaking again, he shared, “As a favor to Abi… Ms. Herterand, I am offering my friendship to you.”

  Shaking my head, I admitted, “I don’t understand.”

  I could tell the difficulty he was having as he stated, “Ask me a question.”

  Suddenly, I drew a blank.

  Frustrated with myself, I concentrated hard to think of something to ask him.

  “Would it help if I told you I knew your mother,” he offered.

  “You did?” I asked.

  With a slight nod Dr. Chepelli replied, “Not on a personal level.”

  Curious now, I questioned, “Then on what level did you know her?”

  “Your mother had a great deal of …difficulty after you were born. When your grandmother passed away, Ms. Herterand thought it might be a good idea for her to seek help,” he informed.

  Confused, I asked, “Are you like a counselor too?”

  After a slight grimace, he stated, “I gave her a way to express her emotions in hopes that it would help.”

  Nodding, I started to get angry.

  “This is where she would come. All the times she left and never said where she was going, she came here. It didn’t help by the way, whatever you tried didn’t work,” I said, jealous that she talked to him and not me.

  Suddenly compassionate, he offered, “I urged her to seek counseling. Every time she visited, I gave her a list of doctors.”

  Shaking my head at him, I snapped, “Well it’s good to know you urged her.”

  “Mrs. Herterand,” he admonished.

  For some reason, something inside me snapped as I assured, “Don’t you Mrs. Herterand me, Dr. Chepelli,” before standing up and saying, “I don’t care what you tried to do because it didn’t do any good. And I don’t care that Ms. Herterand thought she needed help. I needed a mother. I needed for my mother to be a mother to me.” As tears streamed down my face, I stated, “I don’t need your friendship,” before turning to walk out.

  Before I made it to the door, I felt Dr. Chepelli’s hand on my shoulder.

  “It must have been very difficult for you,” he sympathized.

  Wiping my eyes, I admitted, “I needed her.”

  In a soft tone, he agreed, “I know.”

  Glancing up at him, I asked, “Was she like that because of me?”

  Scowling slightly, Dr. Chepelli walked to his desk. Opening a drawer, he pulled out a notebook.

  Making his way back to me, he held the notebook out, saying, “Your mother never shared with me. Sometimes, she would stay for hours, writing.”

  “About what?” I asked before he handed me the notebook, answering, “You will have read this to find out.”

  As I took my mother’s notebook, I asked, “Did you know my father too?”

  His expression revealed more than his answer as he replied, “I knew of him.”

  Nodding, I slid the notebook into my purse.

  Standing there with Dr. Chepelli, I realized this was why Ms. Herterand was so preoccupied during my visit. It was clear she knew more than I would have guessed but exactly how much? Hert had already told me, he stopped visiting her because she told him taking over The Office was a mistake. Now, the question was, why did she feel that way?

  Pulling myself together in order to get back on track, I asked, “Can I still ask you a question?”

  With a slight nod, he offered, “Feel free to call with any questions you may have.”

  Taking a moment to think, I asked, “Do
you know who The Brothers are?”

  “Are you referring to, Ignacio and Fiore?” Dr. Chepelli asked.

  Shrugging, I said, “If they were at the house the night Telli died.”

  “I am familiar with them,” he stated, appearing uneasy.

  Taking a breath, I asked, “Do you know how to get ahold of them?”

  After a long pause, he walked to his desk. He wrote a phone number down on his prescription pad, before tearing it off.

  Handing me the paper, Dr. Chepelli cautioned, “Every moment with them comes with a price. Do not expect them to do you any favors.”

  I gave a slight nod before stepping out of Dr. Chepelli’s office.

  On the way to the Thomas’ house, I thought about my mother. She was the reason The Brothers refused to kill my parents. Wondering what the line they wouldn’t cross was, I needed to know if it was because she was a woman or if there was something else. I had discovered over the last year, that no matter how simple something seemed, there was usually more to it. Maybe, they knew who went in after. There were too many scenarios to pick from, not to mention, although I had an idea, I wasn’t sure exactly what their skill set was. One thing I was sure of, Dr. Chepelli truly cared for Ms. Herterand and since I did too, I was in complete and total agreement with him where she was concerned.

  Feeling a great sense of relief as I walked into the Thomas’ house, I was happy to be babysitting instead of going back to the house. Jackson had Sophia under one arm and Penny under the other pretending to fly them around the room while Mrs. Thomas and I passed out cookies to the boys. Without being able to help it, I reached over and hugged Mrs. Thomas.

  Hugging me back, she asked, “Did your appointment go okay?”

  Letting go of her, I replied, “Yes ma’am.”

  After telling the boys to go to the den, Mrs. Thomas questioned, “How are things at home?”

  Feeling myself frown, I said, “Hert and I are getting divorced.”

  “Oh honey, do you need a place to stay?” she asked.

  Shaking my head, I shared, “No ma’am, I’m staying at the house but thank you.”

  With a curious expression she inquired, “With Hert?”