A Home of Her Own

by Brenda Novak

  It was certainly a cold winter here in Dundee, she decided. Yet the few hours of happiness she’d experienced in Mike’s arms had been well worth the price. She didn’t bother arguing with herself over that. For the first time since she could remember, she’d taken exactly what she wanted, and for a few short hours, she’d felt content. She’d been the girl pressed against the side of the barn; she’d had Mike’s undivided attention. Now she had to do the same thing she’d finally done with Morris—and let go.

  BARBARA HILL TURNED OFF her headlights and crept closer to the old Victorian before pulling to the side of the road. Mike had said Lucky was back, but Barbara didn’t want to believe it. After everything she’d been through, it didn’t seem fair; Red had had enough impact on her life already.

  But a blue Mustang sat in the snow midway down the drive and light shone from the windows of the house. Someone was there; of course it was Lucky. Mike had seen her.

  Knowing that Lucky was once again living in the home in which Barbara had been raised brought back all the negative emotions she’d experienced during her father’s final years. She could still see Red flouncing into the diner while Barbara was trying to have breakfast with her brokenhearted mother, flaunting the huge diamond Morris had given her. She could still hear Red going on and on about how much Morris loved her and her children, how he was finally happy now that he had them. Red had even told everyone they were thinking of adopting a baby together. A baby! When Morris was nearly eighty years old! It was so absurd Barbara hadn’t known how to respond. She’d always admired her father. He’d been an astute businessman, a throwback to the old days when a man’s word was his bond. But he seemed to become a different person once he hooked up with Red. He let her dye his hair a tacky shade of auburn, dress him in matching shirts, turn the house into something garish, kiss and rub against him suggestively in public. Couldn’t he see how silly he looked?

  Then there were the things that had happened later, as the situation grew worse: the infidelities, the lies, the greed, the attempt to kill him with an overdose of insulin.

  Sickened by the memories, Barbara rested her forehead on the steering wheel. She could no longer look at the house. Morris had expected his first family to welcome Red and her children with open arms. For a short while, at the very beginning, Barbara had tried. Even though she felt terrible for her mother, who was lost and miserable without Morris, living in that small duplex just off Fifth Street. Even though Red’s reputation already spoke volumes about her and she knew Red was after her father’s money. Despite all that, she and her sister Cori had met Morris and Red for dinner in Boise one evening. But that night had been one of the worst of their lives. Red had flaunted her control over Morris, made them all look foolish. And, not too long after that, their brother, Bunk, told them that Red had come on to him when he and Morris were working on a land deal together and Red had come over to pick up a check.

  Barbara knew Red must’ve had serious self-esteem issues to need such constant acknowledgement of her sexuality, but it was difficult to be understanding when Red had wreaked such havoc in the lives of the people Barbara most loved—and for so many years. Because Red threw a jealous fit whenever Morris contacted his first family, he’d stopped associating with them. Her father had allowed a woman like Red to tear him away from the people who really loved him. How could he do that? The betrayal bit so deeply, Barbara could only pound the steering wheel with her fists. Damn him! Damn Red and her greedy, self-serving children….

  And now Lucky was back—to live in Barbara’s childhood home and serve as a constant reminder of it all.

  THE PHONE WOKE Mike from a dead sleep. Lifting his head, he saw that it was nearly midnight and he’d nodded off at his desk. Probably because he was so reluctant to return to his own bed. He knew he’d only start remembering what had happened when he’d slept there last: the moment Lucky had slipped into his room, pulled off that sweatshirt and…

  Another ring shattered the silence, and he groped for the phone. “Hello?”

  “Mike?”

  Josh. Mike rubbed his eyes. “Yeah. How’s the vacation?”

  “We’re finding out it’s not easy to travel with an infant.”

  Josh sounded rueful enough to make Mike chuckle. “You should’ve left Brian with Mom. She’s missing him already.”

  “Rebecca would never have agreed to that. Besides, Brian’s still nursing.”

  “Of course. I forgot.”

  “Speaking of Mom…”

  Mike heard a subtle change in the inflection of his brother’s voice. “What about her?”

  “She says Lucky Caldwell’s back.”

  Obviously, word was spreading fast—all the way to Hawaii. “She is.”

  “What does she want?”

  “To fix up the house, from what I can gather.”

  “Why now?”

  “How should I know?” Mike dimly realized how irritable he sounded, but he was feeling more and more torn about Lucky and didn’t want his family to bring her up every time they talked.

  “Mom said you gave her a ride into town. Didn’t you speak to her?”

  “She didn’t have much to say.”

  “Did she tell you what she has planned for the house once she finishes fixing it up?”

  “She might sell.”

  “To us?”

  “Maybe.”

  “That’s a switch. Are you sure?”

  “That’s what she said. But she didn’t make any promises.”

  “No, I don’t suppose she would,” Josh said. “Mom says she likes being in the power position, likes knowing she has what we want.”

  Feeling defensive of Lucky again, in spite of himself, Mike raked a hand through his hair. “That might’ve been true about Red, but I don’t think it’s like that with Lucky, Josh.”

  “Maybe not. But Mom wants us to go over there and see if we can talk Lucky into selling before making the improvements. She said she can’t spend Christmas knowing that Red’s daughter is living in the house.”

  “Christmas is in less than three weeks.”

  “I know. To be honest, I’d rather ignore the fact that Lucky’s even around. Grandpa gave her the house and there’s nothing we can do about it. But Mom can’t see it that way.”

  “Josh…”

  “What?”

  “I don’t want you going over there.”

  “Why?”

  “Just leave her alone, okay?”

  “Why?” he said again.

  “Because I said so.”

  Mike’s words resulted in a strained pause.

  “What’s going on?” Josh asked at last.

  “Nothing.”

  “Bullshit. I know you too well to believe that.”

  Dropping his head in his hands, Mike began kneading his forehead. “Where’s Rebecca?”

  “She’s in the other room, watching TV and feeding the baby. Why?”

  “Because I’m going to tell you something that stays between us.”

  “What’s that?” Josh said, sounding hesitant.

  “I slept with Lucky last night.”

  Shocked silence. Finally, “What do you mean, you slept with her?”

  “What do you think I mean?”

  “I don’t believe it.”

  “It’s true.”

  Josh cursed softly under his breath. “What the hell were you thinking?”

  Of the regret he felt for bungling the night before. Of allowing himself one night to satisfy them both. Of the water pounding down on Lucky’s naked body…“It just…happened, okay?”

  “Were you drunk? I hope to hell you were drunk, Mike. At least then you might have an excuse.”

  “I wasn’t drunk.”

  “Isn’t she young? Really young? Like…twenty? And if I remember right, she’s none too pretty.”

  She was beautiful now, but Mike wasn’t about to say so. He knew sharing that information would make him sound more affected than he wanted to appear—than
he really was. “Would you quit it?” he snapped. “She’s twenty-four. Twenty-four is old enough.”

  “You’re nearly forty!”

  “Lower your voice before Rebecca hears you. You’re not helping the situation.”

  Josh blew out an audible sigh. “I’m trying. I’m focusing on the age difference and her less-than-pleasing appearance because, the way I see it, those are the least of your worries. Just wait until Lucky starts talking. Word’ll spread like wildfire that you jumped into the sack with her, and Mom will feel like the brunt of the biggest joke ever to hit town. She’ll be crushed.”

  “What happened between Lucky and me doesn’t have anything to do with Mom,” Mike growled.

  “But she’ll take it as a personal betrayal. You know that, don’t you?”

  Mike shoved away from his desk so he could stand up and pace. “Lucky’s not going to say anything to anyone.”

  “How do you know?”

  He didn’t. He knew neither one of them had planned on what had happened. But whether or not she’d use recent events to her advantage, he couldn’t say. Considering how people in this town were treating her, like some kind of leper, she might be tempted to strike back.

  In any case, it probably wouldn’t be long before he found out.

  WITH ONLY THREE WEEKS before Christmas, Lucky knew she had to get busy if she wanted to make any progress on the house. First she needed to have the windows fixed. Next she had to meet with a loan officer at the bank to arrange an equity line of credit so she could finance the improvements, which would cost at least thirty thousand dollars. Then she had to rent some basic furniture, solicit estimates on the rehab and hire a contractor.

  As soon as she could dig her car out of the snow, which was slowly melting beneath a much warmer sun now that the storm had passed, she drove to the bank. Fortunately, she had no problem borrowing against the value of the house. She got approval on her loan the very next day. It was her first call after receiving telephone service.

  She didn’t have any difficulty getting the windows fixed or renting some furniture, either, but it wasn’t easy to find a contractor. There wasn’t much building going on in this part of Idaho during the winter, so there weren’t many people engaged in that line of work.

  By the end of the week, she’d found a man by the name of Fredrick Sharp, who seemed capable and was willing to start on December seventeenth. But he refused to stay on the job any later than the twentieth because he had family coming from out of town.

  “That means you’ll be pulling off the job after only four days,” Lucky said, unable to conceal her disappointment when she met him at the diner on Saturday morning.

  He gave her a copy of the contract they’d just signed and put the other in his shirt pocket. “I can start again after the first.”

  January first! At this rate she’d never get the house done. After that night with Mike, she felt as if she needed to finish her plans and leave as soon as possible—before she was reduced to sitting at the window, hoping to see him drive by. Or sneaking out to his barn to watch him work, the way she used to as a child.

  “What about quitting the twenty-second? Two more days would make a big difference. Christmas Eve isn’t until the twenty-fourth.”

  He finished his coffee and pushed his cup off to the side. “Sorry, my wife would hang me by my toenails,” he said with a lopsided grin. “It’s my family who’s coming.” Tossing a five-dollar bill onto the table to pay for their coffee, he got up as though no was his last word on the subject, and Lucky realized this barrel-chested, ruddy father of five wouldn’t budge on his work schedule.

  “Okay.” They shook hands to finalize their deal and walked across the street to pick out the paint. But they hadn’t been in the hardware store more than five minutes when she heard a familiar voice coming from the next aisle over.

  “So now you’re thinking about replacing the whole roof?”

  It was Mike. She knew because her knees went weak and she immediately recalled that same voice whispering to her, coaxing her to relax in the steamy shower.

  “That roof’s twenty years old,” someone else, an older man, replied.

  “But it’s winter.” Mike again. “No one replaces a roof midwinter unless he’s crazy or has no choice.”

  “I’ll have two weeks over the holiday break. It’d be nice to get it done while I’m off work, if the weather will—”

  “Listen to Mike, Dad. You don’t want to risk it,” a third voice interrupted.

  That had to be Josh, Lucky decided. Josh, Mike and their father, Coach Hill. Lucky had strictly avoided Mike and Josh’s father when she was in high school. Like everyone else, she’d had to take P.E. in order to graduate. But she’d signed up for dance, even though she preferred track—anything to avoid facing Coach Hill day after day.

  “Let’s just patch the roof, then paint the living room. One major project is enough,” Mike said.

  “Is something wrong?”

  Lucky started when Mr. Sharp touched her elbow. He’d been talking about gloss and semi-gloss paints and asking how often she planned on washing her walls, but she’d lost track of the conversation.

  Lowering her voice, she said, “No, nothing.”

  A curious expression crossed his face. “Why are you suddenly whispering?”

  “I’m not whispering,” she said, but she was, and she wasn’t about to stop until Mike, Josh and their father left the store. She didn’t want to attract their attention. She knew Mike probably wouldn’t acknowledge her while he was in the company of his family and she wasn’t sure she could handle such a snub after what they’d shared.

  “So, do you want the semi-gloss?”

  Lucky nodded. At this point, she didn’t care what she ended up with as long as Mr. Sharp piped down for a few minutes.

  Instead of falling silent and staying in place, as she’d hoped, he picked up two gallons of cream-colored paint and headed toward the cashier, obviously expecting her to follow so she could pay for it.

  “Don’t you need anything else before we check out?” she asked, her voice rising only slightly to cover the distance.

  He scowled as he glanced over his shoulder. “I already told you, I have all the other supplies.”

  “Oh…right.”

  “And I have to give old man Bedderman an estimate on remodeling his bathroom at ten, so we’d better scoot.”

  She’d forgotten about his other appointment. “Of course. Well, you scoot. I’ll—” Before Lucky could finish, Josh and his father turned the corner and nearly barreled into her new contractor. While everyone jostled to avoid a collision, Lucky bent over a can of varnish and began examining the label, just in case there was still a chance Mike’s brother and father might pass by without seeing her.

  “Lucky?” Sharp said, his voice impatient. “You’ll what?”

  Lucky’s stomach tensed as the full focus of all three men landed on her, but she looked up, anyway. Of course it’d come to this. In Dundee, she’d always had to deal with her demons head-on. “I’ll pay for the paint in a minute and take it home with me. Just leave the cans at the register.”

  “Right. See you next week. Josh, Coach,” Mr. Sharp said in passing. Then he was gone, and Lucky was alone in the aisle with Mike’s father and brother.

  Standing, she threw back her shoulders and took a deep breath. She might be willing to cower in the corner when Coach Hill and his sons didn’t know she was around, but she’d never let them see her cower.

  Coach Hill had frozen in place the moment recognition dawned. “Lucky.”

  She nodded cautiously as Mike rounded the corner carrying some sort of tool. As soon as he saw her, a frown creased his handsome face, the face she’d studied so earnestly in the motel.

  “Maybe it’s a good thing we bumped into each other,” Coach Hill said.

  His words were nice enough. The Caldwells were always careful not to lose control. But the coldness in his eyes sent chills down Lucky’s spine.


  “Maybe you wouldn’t mind coming over to the diner with us,” he went on. “We have some business we’d like to discuss.”

  “No, we don’t,” Mike said.

  His father gave him a dark look. “Yes, we do.”

  Lucky wasn’t sure what to think, but she knew she didn’t want to let the three of them corner her in a booth at the diner. “What kind of business?”

  “We’d like to buy the Victorian.”

  “I already know that,” she said. “I…I’m considering it.”

  “We’d like to buy it right away. Today.”

  She shook her head. “I’m sorry, but I’m not quite ready to sell.”

  “When will you be?”

  “Maybe in a few months.”

  “You’ve got to make sure you ruin everyone’s Christmas first, is that it?”

  “Damn it, Dad, come on.” Mike physically pulled his father in the other direction, but Coach Hill jerked out of his grasp.

  “Just sell us the house and be done with it,” he said to Lucky. “No one wants you here. No one even wants to talk to you.”

  The pain and anger flowing through her tempted Lucky to tell him that his own son had done a little more than talk to her. She was so tired of the arrogance, the derision. She wanted to shock and hurt him as badly as he was hurting her. But when she glanced Mike’s way, she knew she’d never do it, even if he felt exactly as his father did. She cared about him too much.

  “I don’t remember asking for anyone’s approval,” she said instead, but her voice wasn’t nearly as belligerent as she’d intended. Terrified that they’d realize how close to tears she was, she narrowed her eyes and glared at them haughtily.