Ian took a step toward her, but she held up her hand. If he came near her, touched her, she would tell him the truth. All of it. And she needed to retain some shred of dignity, no matter how thin of a thread it might be. “You should go.”
“Please.” She begged, her voice thick with tears.
Lexi kept her gaze downward, knowing that if she looked at him she wouldn’t be able to remain strong. After several long moments, he picked up his shirt and walked quietly to the door.
“You’re wrong, Lexi,” he said quietly. “Me and Kayla, it’s not what you think. It’s just... not.”
Then he opened the door and was gone, and Lexi gave in to the tears.
Chapter Twelve
It had not been a good day. After Ian left, Lexi cried alone in her room until there were simply no more tears left, falling into an exhausted sleep sometime right before dawn. Then Aidan called, worried that she hadn’t responded to his emails or texts. Hearing her voice, he had known immediately that something was wrong, and she’d spent the next hour trying to convince him not to drop everything and fly up in his private plane.
Jack had come for her in the late morning. The concern was evident in his eyes as he insisted on taking her out to lunch, commenting that she looked too tired, too pale. It was true enough. The drama of returning to Pine Ridge was definitely taking its toll, though she had only herself to blame. She had learned a long time ago that life wasn’t so much about what happened to you as how you dealt with it.
Yes, Ian had pursued her, but she could have said no and refused to sleep with him. Hell, she’d had no problem turning away everyone else.
And yes, Kayla had made things unpleasant for her, but what was new about that? Kayla had spent nearly every moment of their childhood together doing that, and she’d learned to deal with it. To this day she had no idea why Kayla despised her as much as she did, but things didn’t always make sense, did they?
It just proved that the move to Georgia had been the best thing that could have happened to her. Thankfully, her father had realized that even when she hadn’t been able to see it. Lexi had grown up, grown stronger, made something of herself, but Kayla hadn’t changed at all. She was still the petty, vain, insecure girl she’d been ten years ago, and in a way, Lexi couldn’t help but feel sorry for her.
The trip back to her grandmother’s house? Well, that had just been poor judgment on her part.
Even with an unsettled stomach from forcing down a meal she didn’t want, the short trip had been pleasant enough. She’d forgotten how much she loved the mountains – all the cool, clean air. The deep greens and turquoises against a crystal blue sky. The smell of damp earth and pine needles mixing with honeysuckle and mimosa and mountain laurel. No matter how far she travelled, no matter how long she stayed away, this would always feel like home to her.
That nice, cozy feeling hadn’t lasted long, though. The moment the house came into view so did several vehicles. Jack had conveniently neglected to mention that the others had come earlier. Jake and Taryn were there, holding hands as they appeared along the side of the house. Judging by the flushed look on Taryn’s face and Jake’s mussed hair, Lexi guessed they’d found a little magic of their own. Shane and Sean were on the roof, checking out the view, and Lexi was amazed the thing was able to hold their combined weight in its current state.
Kieran appeared in the doorway with a man who had to be the cousin, Johnny. Lexi sucked in a breath when she saw him – he was huge, like all the Callaghan men, with layers of rippling muscle that would have had professional body builders weeping in envy. His long, multi-hued golden hair was tied neatly at the back of his neck by a leather chord. And even from so far away, Lexi could see his green eyes clearly. He was gorgeous, yes, but so were all of the men in this family. What floored her was that he was the spitting image of the male featured on the cover of her latest Salienne Dulcette novel.
“Lex!” shouted Kieran with a huge smile as he jogged out to the car. “This is Johnny Connelly. Johnny, meet Lex.”
Lexi accepted his hand. It swallowed hers, the roughened callouses telling her that he maintained a hands-on role in his business, which elevated him immediately in her eyes. His smile, like his eyes, was warm and genuine.
“Nice to meet you, Lexi,” Johnny said. “Hey, Uncle Jack! Thanks for calling me out on this one. This place is incredible. Kieran has been walking me through it.”
The roar of a motorcycle announced yet another arrival. Lexi stiffened when she heard Ian’s voice behind her and approaching quickly.
“Johnny! Been awhile, man.” Ian greeted his cousin with a firm handshake and a genuine smile.
“Ian. Glad to see you made it back in one piece. Heard it was a tough one.”
Ian shrugged, brushing it off, but Lexi had seen the brief moment of darkness in his eyes, and it sent an unwelcome jolt of fear through her. She had known all of them had (or had planned to) enter the service right out of school – it was a family thing. She didn’t like to think about that, though.
“How’s Stace?”
Johnny’s green eyes practically glowed at the mention of his wife. “Hanging in there. The baby’s giving her a bit of a hard time, but you know Stace. She won’t ever admit it.”
Ian grinned. “Yeah. She’s as stubborn as you.”
Johnny chuckled. “Maybe even more so.” Turning to Lexi, he said, “So, you inherited this place from your grandmother?”
Lexi nodded. “I used to come here when I was little. I’d forgotten all about it until yesterday.”
“Kieran told me your father just passed. I’m sorry about that.”
She thanked him for the kind sentiments. “So tell me, what do you think?”
Johnny smiled. “I like her. No bullshit, just straight to the point – ah, sorry, Uncle Jack,” he added as the older man gave him a disapproving glance. “So, Lexi, are you looking to fix the place up for yourself or put it on the market?”
“I’ll most likely be putting it on the market,” she said, ignoring the laser-like precision of several pairs of luminous blue eyes boring into her. “My home is in Georgia now.”
Johnny nodded. “Kieran told me. You’re some kind of master chef or something, right?”
Lexi reddened. “Kieran exaggerates,” she said, shooting him a look. “But I do cook for a restaurant.”
Kieran snorted. “Yeah. The Celtic Goddess. The entire menu is her creation.”
Lexi cringed. She hated that name, but Aidan had insisted.
“No shit!” Johnny said, shooting another apologetic glance at Jack. “My wife loves that place! We hit it whenever we’re in Boston or Chicago. Never been to the one down south, though. Stace is always saying she wishes they’d open up one around here.”
“You travel a lot then?” Lexi asked, attempting to divert the attention away from herself.
“Yeah, Stace is an author, has to do these book things, you know. Gets us out of town a couple of times a year, but we haven’t been doing much lately because of the baby. She’s due any day now. It’s our first.”
His green eyes glowed with pride and excitement, and something else – fear. Instinctively, Lexi sensed that he was a lot more worried than he let on. She’d seen enough worry and fear in other’s eyes her whole life to recognize it instantly.
“What’s her favorite dish?”
“The pasta with the steak and olives.”
Lexi smiled. “That’s one of my favorites, too. Tell you what. If it’s okay with Uncle Jack, I’ll use his kitchen this afternoon and make some for her.”
Johnny beamed. “She would love that.”
“Then consider it done. Now about this house...”
“It’s a great house,” Johnny told her. “Foundation is good, solid. Structure is sound. Can’t remember when the last time was I came across stone like this,” he said approvingly. “Or saw a cellar with an honest-to-God cold spring. It needs some work, but nothing too major. Mostly cosmetic stuff. Biggest thing is
the roof, you’ll want that replaced as soon as possible. Most of it these guys can handle,” he said, indicating the men who’d gathered around, “but I’ll oversee the reno personally if you agree.”
Lexi thanked him.
“Hey,” Johnny said with a grin, “Kieran says you’re family.”
“I’ll see you Saturday,” Johnny called back a short while later, getting into his truck. “And bring Lexi,” he added with a smile and a knowing laugh. “Stacey’s going to kill me if she finds out I met her and didn’t introduce them.”
“What’s on Saturday?” Lexi asked, turning to Kieran.
“The county fair. Official site of the annual Callaghan/Connelly family reunion.”
“Oh.” She bit her lip. She would be gone by then, but there was no need to bring that up now. The last thing she needed was for them all to gang up on her at once. She just didn’t have the strength.
Lexi wandered around the house again while she waited for the others. They seemed to understand her desire to be alone, but she also knew she was always within sight of one of them. She’d forgotten what it felt like to be the focus of so much attention, so much worry. It was comforting, in a way, yet somewhat suffocating.
And what was Ian doing there? Kieran mentioned something about a security system, and Ian was the resident genius when it came to electronics. It was hard to concentrate, knowing he was there, in the next room or just down the hallway. Despite herself, she sought him out, always hoping to catch him in her peripheral vision, or to turn suddenly and find him there, watching her. But she’d only managed occasional glimpses of him now and then.
Still, she felt his presence keenly. And as the afternoon went on, the weight of the tension between them increased. The pressure in the air around her grew heavier until it felt like a huge storm was bearing down on them. Thankfully, no one else seemed to be aware of it.
Escaping outdoors had its own perils as well, even though it seemed like such a good idea at the time. The yard was overgrown; the path around the once lovingly-tended gardens was now little more than a haphazard collection of barely-visible, disjointed stones.
Lexi meandered around the area, fondly recalling the beauty she had seen there so long ago. Her eyes widened in excitement when she saw the huge clump of black raspberries near the far end of the yard. It had been ages, but she remembered how sweet they tasted right off the bush.
“LEXI!” Kieran’s roar was so loud and so unexpected she yelped in surprise and stumbled, her shirt catching on the thorns. Within seconds she felt herself being hauled backward forcibly out into the open while Kieran frantically disentangled her from the brambles.
“Are you crazy?” Kieran hissed, searching her arms and legs for cuts.
The others were moving quickly, brought forth by Kieran’s yell. Not surprisingly, Ian was the first to reach them. Lexi saw the question burning in his intense blue eyes and felt her cheeks grow scarlet in embarrassment.
“Let me go,” she demanded, slapping at Kieran’s arms until he released her. Feeling more humiliated than ever, she shot Kieran a look fierce enough to make him take a step back, then stormed away.
“What was that all about?” she heard Ian ask behind her. Please don’t tell him, Lexi silently begged.
“Nothing that concerns you,” Kieran barked in response. “Just stay away from her, Ian.”
Thank God for Taryn. After witnessing the end of the little drama, she stepped up and offered to take Lexi back to the Pub for a little girl time.
Lexi liked Taryn; she really did. She felt an instant kinship with Jake’s new bride, and that in itself was an unexpected bonus. Lexi rarely felt connected to anyone, but the few she did were a small group, and almost exclusively male. To find a woman she genuinely liked and felt semi-comfortable around was beyond rare. As a matter of fact, she would be hard-pressed to come up with another example. The fact that Taryn had rescued her without asking any questions only reinforced her initial opinion.
The afternoon took a definite upturn as they picked up some groceries and went back to the Pub kitchens. Taryn was bold and wickedly funny, her irreverence for the world around her refreshingly pleasant.
“You and Jake,” Lexi commented, as she sliced the veggies, her hands moving fast and accurately, cutting the ingredients into perfect, consistent pieces. “You guys are the real thing.”
Taryn pounded the steak into paper-thin strips like Lexi had shown her. “What do you mean?”
“Soul mates,” Lexi said, scooping the veggies into a frying pan, splashing it with extra virgin olive oil before turning to the piles of fresh herbs. She did so effortlessly, her hands working independently of everything else, without having to think about it. “I mean, the way you look at each other. It’s like the stuff they write about, you know? When Jake looks at you, it’s like you’re the center of his whole world.”
“You mean like how Ian looks at you?”
The knife hit the cutting board hard, the sound discordant with the perfect rhythm she’d had going. Lexi cursed, immediately wrapping a towel around her hand.
“Oh, Jesus, I’m sorry,” Taryn exclaimed, her eyes going wide.
“Don’t worry about it,” Lexi said, keeping her voice calm. “Got any super glue around here?”
Taryn looked confused. “Super glue?” She glanced down at Lexi’s hand, where blood was already soaking through the towel at an alarming rate. “Oh, shit ... yeah, hang on.”
Taryn ran to the other side of the kitchen and threw open a drawer, tossing things out of the way till she found what she was looking for.
“Good,” said Lexi, cursing herself for letting this happen. “Give it to me.” Taryn watched in horrified fascination as Lexi pulled off the cap with her teeth and poured the stuff over the cut. “I’ll call 911,” Taryn said, reaching for the phone.
“NO!” Lexi yelled. “It’s okay, trust me. I’ve got this.”
Two more towels and half a bottle of super glue later, the bleeding had almost stopped.
“That’s not normal,” Taryn said, looking a little shaken, though not as much as Lexi would have expected.
“No,” Lexi agreed. “But it’s okay, really. It’s not the first time this has happened, and it won’t be the last. Watch this for me, will you? Don’t let this burn.” Remaining calm, Lexi went over to her bag and pulled out a preloaded syringe. Taryn watched as she injected herself directly above the wrist.
“I need to sit down for a few. I’ll talk you through the rest.”
“Are you sure? Maybe we should –“
“I’m sure.” Lexi’s tone left no question. She looked right into Taryn’s eyes. “I’m sure.” Taryn nodded, looking far less certain.
Lexi grimaced as the industrial-strength clotting agent burned like fire through her veins. After a few minutes, she forced herself to get up and move around, knowing if she didn’t keep her circulation moving, there was the danger of a serious clot forming.
“You’re doing great,” Lexi said a little while later, peering over Taryn’s shoulder. “Call me if you ever want to work as a chef.”
“Lex, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to – “
“It’s okay, Taryn. Really. No big. But listen, I have to go, okay? Let that simmer for another few minutes then take it off the heat.”
“Wait, I’ll drive you back to your hotel.”
“No, I need to walk it, but thanks. And Taryn? I’d really appreciate it if we kept this between us.” Without another word, Lexi picked up her bag and made her exit, keeping her head high and a smile pasted on her face until she got outside.
Chapter Thirteen
When she got back to the hotel, Lexi changed out of her bloodied clothes, gave herself a quick clean-up, wrapped up her hand in waterproof tape, and headed for the pool. The cool, soothing water felt good, and if she was lucky, she would be able to swim herself into enough of an exhaustive state that she might actually get a few hours of sleep. She should have known better.
Lexi sliced through the water with such precision she barely made a sound. Stroke after stroke, lap after lap. Swimming had always been a good outlet for her, one of the few athletic events in which she could actually participate. No physical contact with others, no balls or sticks or blades. And she excelled at it.
Like the way Ian looks at you? The words rang out in her head over and over again, right along with the image of Taryn’s horrified expression at the sight of all the blood. She pulled harder, faster, cutting through the water as if she could outpace them. The chemicals rushed through her veins, the familiar burning in her nose and throat and ears as her body absorbed them, until little by little, she started to feel normal again. Until she started thinking clearly again.
In the water, she felt weightless, invincible. It soothed and calmed her, held her until she worked out her demons. Kieran used to tease her that Poseidon was one of her ancestors. Sometimes, especially in times of great stress when the water was her only comfort, she wondered if there was a tiny grain of truth in there somewhere.
Kieran was watching her now, just like he used to back then, too. For more than an hour she’d caught the sight of his big body sitting off to the side at every flip-turn, waiting patiently. She wasn’t surprised. He knew her well enough to know a pool would be the first place she’d flee when things got to be too much. She would swim until her lungs burned and her muscles deadened, then he’d pull her out of the water and make her tell him what was bothering her anyway.
Right on schedule, she saw him crouched along the far end. In the midst of her flip turn, he reached in and wrapped his hand around her ankle before she pushed off. When she whipped around to protest, he simply plucked her out of the pool.
Lexi just went with it, had known it was coming, though she was somewhat surprised at the ease with which he had done it. After all, she wasn’t a skinny kid anymore. Then again, Kieran was the size of a rather large bear these days.
First and Only: Callaghan Brothers, Book 2 Page 10
