Broken Chains

by Lizzy Ford

  On Saturday, I manage to sneak out without the media noticing. While there are still people camping out outside my building, the focus has shifted towards my father, Joseph and the Connors.

  Trailed by two Fabios, I enter the quiet campground of a private corporate resort off the Chesapeake Bay, where Gerard spent a week or two with his advisors every summer. I don’t want to deal with the press or people in general, and I can’t really find any peace in or near the city since everyone knows my face.

  The grounds are quiet and chilly, with log cabins and swaying trees sitting beneath a gray sky. The leaves are starting to fall and form piles at the bases of the trees.

  I’m sitting down at a picnic table near the edge of the water when Dom joins me. He sits beside me, and we watch the calming movement of the bay.

  “How are you feeling?” I ask.

  “Great. My mom’s been force-feeding me enough food to feed a small country. It’s her solution to everything. It seems to be working.”

  I smile. “You have a good family,” I murmur, recalling how everyone came to see him at the hospital.

  “This past week was crazy. You okay?”

  I glance at him. He’s relaxed. Whenever I look at him, warmth fills me, and I become frustrated with how my thoughts scatter.

  “I feel like I will be,” I reply honestly. “Chris and I want to sit down with Gianna soon. I want to help other girls like me, but I don’t know where to start. I don’t want anything to do with Gerard and hope to fund some kind of foundation with my Abbott-Renou inheritance.”

  “That’s amazing, Mia,” Dom says. “Gianna would love to help you.”

  His praise always leaves me blushing. I don’t deserve any credit. I have money – that’s it. I’m not like Gianna. I don’t think I can work in a shelter the rest of my life, exposed daily to women who are in worse situations than I’ve been in. But I can fund programs and find people like Gianna to help them.

  “My nieces haven’t stopped talking about the ice cream party,” Dom says with a laugh. “You and Ari are their heroes.”

  I smile, recalling the fun day. “We can do it again.”

  “We’d all like that.” His gaze is direct, warm.

  I don’t need my sweater. Dom’s presence is enough for my internal heater setting to climb to super high.

  His eyes shift to the bay, for which I’m grateful. I don’t know how to feel around Dom, let alone what to say. He’s left our friendship … potential relationship … in my hands, and I don’t yet know what I want at this point, except I definitely want him in my life.

  “Have you ever thought about moving out of the DC area?” I ask.

  “My family moved from New York to the DC area a few years ago. I don’t think my mom wanted to be near where my father was killed. I followed everyone else after college. I haven’t really thought about leaving.”

  “You want to stay near your family,” I guess.

  “Yeah.”

  I consider his answer. I don’t actually know what I want to do, or where I want to go when I graduate. I think I want to be far away from … something. Maybe it’s myself. Dr. Thompkins would tell me I need to evaluate the reason behind wanting to run away to find the root of why I feel that way before I do something impulsive.

  There are days when I’d like to leave the DC area just to get away from him and the deep diving we do into my brain.

  “Are you thinking of moving?” Dom asks.

  “I don’t know,” I reply. “You have a reason to like your family.”

  He laughs.

  I like it when he’s happy. He pulls me out of my dark thoughts.

  “You have time to think about everything,” he says. “I’m always here to talk.”

  If there’s one truly good thing that’s come from the past summer, it’s Dom.

  “Want to walk?” he asks and stands. He holds out his hand.

  I accept it. We walk down the bank in comfortable silence. His hand is warm and calloused, his grip firm, his presence enough to remind me there is good in this world.

  My phone vibrates. I ignore it until it becomes clear Ari isn’t going to leave me in peace. I pull it out of my back pocket. She’s sent me a link, along with the words, Robert’s dead.

  My breath catches in my throat. I stop walking and click the link. Reading the article, I feel … nothing. A trickle of relief maybe, though that makes me feel like I’m a bad person. Amidst the anger and horror I’ve felt since that dinner with Gerard, I also felt pity towards Robert for being caught up in the same world I have been. I can’t help thinking it’s part of what turned him into a monster.

  I feel the pity again, even though I know Robert Connor has never deserved it.

  “What is it?” Dom asks.

  I show him the screen of my phone. He skims the title and meets my gaze.

  “I feel really angry. But also a little bad for him,” I murmur. “Should I?”

  “You’re a good person. It’s hard not to feel bad in this kind of situation,” he replies.

  I put the phone away, trying to identify all my thoughts. For me, the end started when Robert took the deal with the DA.

  For him, that’s when his nightmare began.

  “He took the easy way out. You’re stronger than you know, Mia.”

  “Am I?” I ask, genuinely puzzled.

  Dom brushes my cheek with the back of his fingers.

  I trust Dom more than I trust anyone. I’ve been drawn to him since the very beginning.

  “You withstood the attention of the entire world after going through something no one ever should, and you did it on your own,” he replies. “You’re tough, smart and strong, and you’re going to help people. You’ve already started.”

  My thoughts go to Tanya. I’m never going to get over feeling responsible for her death.

  Dom tips my chin up. “Trust me. You’re strong.”

  I smile, cheeks warm again. I believe Dom.

  “Are you certain you want to be in my life, Dom?” I venture to ask. “Whenever I think about all the shit that happened the past few months, I can’t help wondering why anyone would want to be anywhere near me.”

  “I’m in it for the ice cream.”

  Startled, I stare at him and then laugh.

  He grins. “I know what I’m doing, Mia. I know who I am, and who you are, and yes, I want to be in your life.”

  It’s the best thing I’ve heard. I want to cry, but I don’t. I want to spend a day with Dom where I don’t cry for once.

  I slide my hand into his. We continue walking.

  The next day, I wake up to Ari texting me all in caps and celebratory gifs, along with a few links. Several media sites have posted the picture of Dom and me walking hand in hand along the bay. Some damned paparazzi took a picture that appears to have been snapped from a very long distance away, given the grainy texture. Dom’s connection to me is no longer a secret.

  I hesitate then text him. So you’re in the news again.

  Nervous about how he’ll handle it, even if I believe him when he says he can, I go to the kitchen and pull out one of the breakfast containers Nellie has left me. I snatch the phone the second I hear his text.

  My family thinks I’m famous, he’s typed.

  I can almost see him smiling. If there’s anyone I don’t have to worry about, it’s Dom. He was on his feet two days after being shot. He can deal with a few nosy reporters.

  I have another text from Chris.

  Molly’s team is crafting a statement for you about Robert’s suicide. I’ll send it over.

  I feel bad for Robert’s family, not as much for his death, but because none of them could’ve known what kind of person he really was. I have no warmth whatsoever for his father or Gerard, but Robert had a couple of sisters and a mother. For all I know, they’re as dysfunctional as my family, but maybe they aren’t and maybe they’re hurting. I don’t know, and for once, I don’t care as much as I think I probably should,

&nbs
p; It’s odd I don’t feel more strongly about his death. I don’t feel vindicated or like he got what he deserves. I also don’t feel what I expect I would for someone else who committed suicide. I don’t feel angry or sad or happy or anything. It’s possible the emotions will come later, as they sometimes do, once I’ve had time to examine my thoughts.

  There is one point, though, where I do know what I think.

  Been thinking about RC. I feel like Tanya has some justice now, I message Dom.

  His text brings tears to my eyes. You both do.

  Don’t get shot, hero, I reply.

  I send Chris a short response to his note and lean against the counter. My mind isn’t on Robert at all, but on Dom, and I realize another reason why Robert’s death hasn’t impacted me as much as it could have.

  That day when Madison confronted me, and I was trapped in my safe room with my anger and fear, I decided I was done living in the past. I will never forget what I’ve been through, and Robert’s death is the ultimate form of justice.

  But Robert is also part of the past I won’t let trap me anymore. I’m done reliving that night. I’m ready to heal, even if I know I’ve got a hard journey ahead of me. I can do it – I will do it, not just for myself, but for the people I care about and the people I want to help.

  I’m not the same girl I was before the incident, not the same as I was immediately after. I’m not even the same person I was two weeks ago.

  I choose not to let my past control me anymore.

  My eyes go to my phone, and I pull up Dom’s texts. Hope and warmth bubble within me. One day, when I’m ready, Dom will become my future.

  Part of me fears he won’t wait that long.

  In my heart, I know he will.

  Epilogue

  Dom comes to Molly’s wedding in December as my date, and we both attend Joseph’s victory party when he steals Gerard’s Senate seat from him. My former siblings keep their promise. Once Joseph is elected, he leaves me alone for the most part. I become old news after a year or so. Every once in a while, we do a family photo shoot for the press. I regularly meet with Molly for brunch or dinner. The more I’m around her, the more I like her. Occasionally, she still gets on my nerves, but in general, we get along better than we ever have.

  I stay in the DC area after I graduate high school to attend college and create a foundation for women in need, headed by Chris, Gianna and me. I have more money than I can ever spend in the trust my mother created for me and donate all my Abbott-Renou inheritance to the foundation. Chris becomes my full-time attorney and father, which requires some adjustment after all my years without true parental supervision. We end up moving farther away from DC on the Northern Virginia side. I can’t escape him – he lives five minutes away – but I have enough privacy at my own place. It takes us some time, and the help of Dr. Thompkins, to figure out our father-daughter relationship. Chris becomes the type of father I need, someone I can count on, who wants what’s best for me. I end up becoming a decent daughter, I think. No more smart ass remarks or resistance when he tries to help me. We make a deal to put our tiny family first above politics and everything else, and we keep to it, probably because neither of us has ever been interested in politics anyway.

  My mom comes back once to finish up the divorce mess – then not again for several years. She and Chris can’t stand one another, but it works in my favor. She’s happy overseas, and I’m happier with her there, too. I quickly figure out I prefer a quiet life outside the public eye. It’s the opposite of my mother’s highly visible life. I do miss her, even knowing how different we are.

  Dom somehow manages to balance being a cop and the significant other of an Abbott-Renou. Even outside of politics, my family name – and the money connected to it – are well known. He transfers to a small town near me, where he becomes an instant local celebrity. Whenever someone shows up at court, it’s not to challenge a ticket he gave but to get an autograph. I’m not sure how he manages it all, except that nothing seems to surprise him. I’ve never seen him lose his temper, and he takes everything in stride. We have ice cream parties every few months with his nieces until they grow out of it, at which point Ari and I take them to the spa instead.

  It’s two years before I let Dom kiss me, and it’s five years before we become engaged. True to his word, he’s patient and lets me set the pace of our relationship. He doesn’t care how long he has to wait, and I find myself more in awe of him the longer we’re together. His family is uncertain of me at first, and I’m equally hesitant to interact with them. They’re close and warm, and I have no idea how to act among people who genuinely care for one another. After a while, I end up looking forward to the Sunday dinners where Dom’s mother cooks enough for an army, and I attend the events of his nieces and nephews and sit amidst his family members. I’ll never be as outgoing as everyone in his family, but they end up adopting me nonetheless.

  Ari and I remain best friends, and we add Jenna to our little clique. Every summer, we take a girls’ vacation and travel to whatever part of the world we want to visit that year. Ari is groomed to work in her family business, until she falls for the son of one of her father’s competitors, which causes all kind of drama in the Beltway. In the end, both of them leave their families’ businesses, marry and settle outside of DC, not far from me. After teaming up with several other girls to put Benji in jail, Jenna finishes college and leaves the DC area to take a job overseas in the State Department but flies back every year to go with Ari and me on vacation.

  Throughout everything, Dom, Chris and Ari continue to be my foundation. They’re there on my bad days, when I break down crying from memories and give in to the depression that continues to haunt me long after the incident. They’re there on my good days, too, such as when we open a women’s shelter on the south side of DC.

  Seven years after we first met, Dom and I are married in a private ceremony in our backyard. In addition to Dom’s family and Ari’s, I invite Molly and Joseph and surprisingly, they attend, along with their families. Chris and Mama manage to tolerate each other long enough to sit on the same side of the aisle, and Kiesha sits between them to make sure they don’t kill each other.

  I already know Dom and I will break the mold of marriage characteristic of my family. I already know Dom will always be the center of my world, and I’ll be his.

  Our sunset ceremony is perfect. Simple. Quiet. The way we prefer things.

  It’s the first of many, many beautiful days.

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