by Unknown
Before I realized it, hours had passed and it was 1a.m. Angie had made me promise to be present for our early morning run so I reluctantly hopped down from the stool, stepped back and took in my latest creation. Not too shabby! I took a final glance before I cut off the light, took a quick shower and once again went to bed in my running clothes.
*****
Again the run had come too soon but it was better this time. The air was crisp and there was a fine glaze of frost on the trees and ground. I took in deep heaves of the cool air and exhaled large puffs of white smoke-like breath. Today I was three laps in and still felt energized. It was a welcome change to the past few times when I’d felt certain I was going to die before I got through my third lap. I was proud of my progress.
I had tried to be inconspicuous as I scanned the park hoping to see Mike. He hadn’t been there the past few times and I was beginning to wonder if he’d stopped coming because of me. Maybe it was just too awkward. I pondered the thought for a moment before putting it out of my mind. I shifted my focus to the rows of feet trotting in front of me and matched their rhythm. Fatigue started to set in as we finished the fourth lap around the park. Only one more to go. I assured myself as I fought to maintain my pace.
“Don’t give up now. You’re doing great!”
I didn’t need to look behind me. I knew it was Mike.
“How is it that you keep popping up out of thin air,” I asked with feigned annoyance.
“Well, we’ve been over this before but I’ll play along. I’ve been running at this park for years and you just started a week ago. Surely you didn’t expect me to stop running here just because you started?” Mike gave me an inquisitive look as he matched my stride. He had the sexiest smirk on his face and even though he was being a complete smartass, I wanted to take him off the running path and into the woods for a roll in the fallen autumn leaves.
I decided against propositioning him and instead resigned to his statement. “I guess you have a point. So how’ve you been?”
“I’ve been great actually. I just closed on a new house and I am looking at purchasing a garage to start an auto repair business. It’s something I’ve wanted and been working on for a while now. It feels good to be moving things in the direction of my vision. How are things with you?”
“Wait!” I shrieked. “Don’t try to breeze by the fact that you bought a house and you’re working on starting a business! That’s great Mike!” Aside from being thrilled to learn something new about a man of whom I knew very little, I was genuinely excited for him. I was glad to know he had higher aspirations than just roadside assistance. I wanted him to keep talking and tell me more. I knew it would make the run go faster, plus, I was eager to know him in an upright position. “Tell me about the shop. Where’s it located and what about your house? What neighborhood is it in? How’s the school district? Does it have a nice yard for Adrian?” I looked over at Mike with eyes full of inquisition and was met with a gaze of emotion I couldn’t quite place. Maybe I’m asking too much too soon? Crap! I studied him a moment more before I returned my attention to the pavement in front of me. I didn’t want to make him feel awkward, even though part of me felt like evaporating into the misty morning air.
“You really want to hear about it all? I’d love to show you both in person. And thanks for asking about Adrian. You haven’t even met him and yet and you’re concerned about the school district and the yard. That’s really nice.” I knew then that he wasn’t upset. He was touched by my interest in his life and his son. I tried to subdue my cheesy grin to a polite smile, but there was no hiding the skip I felt in my heart knowing he wanted me to not only know more about his life, but he also wanted to show it to me.
We ran together the remaining lap, talking and laughing along the way. In what seemed like just a few short minutes, the run was over and I’d done the whole five miles without feeling like I wanted to die. Being around Mike gave me a new energy. I felt like I could have done another lap if I had to, as long as he was running along beside me to keep me company. At the base of the hill that led to the parking lot, we stopped briefly and stretched before going down to the cars. I bent at my waist and gripped my ankles pretending to ignore the low rumble that escaped Mike’s chest signaling his rouse. No need to torture the man. I smirked as I stood and leaned my back against a nearby tree.
Mike closed the distance between us, resting his arms above my head against the tree as he looked down at me. “So seriously Erin, what’s new with you? What have you been up to? You let me do all the talking this morning!” I watched his eyes fixate on my mouth as he awaited my reply.
In my most poised and controlled tone I answered. “Besides this running thing, I started an art class a couple of days ago and I really have a passion for it. Like right now, I can’t wait to get home and get back to painting. I just turn on my jazz, pop open the paint and let the art flow through my fingers. It feels like nothing else I can remember. I feel… free.”
“You’re sure there isn’t anything else you can remember that made you feel that way?” He licked his bottom lip and just the sight of the sliver of pink sent my thoughts racing back to how it felt against my flesh. I ducked beneath Mike’s arm and started walking toward the parking lot.
“Nope, there’s nothing else I can recall that satisfies me as much as painting does.” I didn’t dare look back to face him. I could hear the scuffle of his feet against the round as he jogged up to meet me. Focused solely on getting to my car, I denied him the satisfaction of even a sideward glance, but as I reached for my door handle he gripped my hand. He was standing so close I barely had room to turn and face him. He traced his fingers lightly against the back of my hand, never breaking his intense gaze.
“It’s nice to hear you say you’ve found something you’re passionate about, but I have to admit I’m not sure how I feel about hearing art gives you more passion than anything you’ve ever known.” He reached over and stroked my cheek. His thumb rested against my chin barely grazing my bottom lip as he tilted my head up toward him. I defied the urge to lick the tip of his thumb and sucked my bottom lip in behind her teeth.
“You know I didn’t mean it like that Mike,” I said softly.
“I miss you Erin. I really would like to spend some time with you. I’d like for you to meet my son and for us to get to know each other. I know for certain that we have a physical connection, but I want to know you on every level. I want to watch you learn about your passions and help you grow. I want you to know that I’m still ready to do whatever it takes to see you get the happiness you deserve.” His fingers were again softly stroking my cheek and at that moment I was prepared to teach him all about my passion. I wanted to drown him in it and was giving serious consideration to asking him to follow me home when I heard a voice calling me from across the parking lot. I stuck my head out from behind the shield of Mike’s broad shoulders and found Angie was still there, leaning against her car in a space at the end of the lot. Saved! She was throwing me a lifeline to help me keep my attempt at celibacy intact. I waved wildly and yelled, “I’ll be right there!”
I returned my gaze to Mike. “I hate to cut our conversation short. This has been really nice, but maybe we should limit our interaction to runs in the park for now.” I took another peek over his shoulder in Angie’s direction. “I hope they don’t kick me out of the running group. After all, the group name actually has the word girl in it and you are anything but!” Despite my better judgment, I drank him in slowly, taking in the intricacy of his etched frame through his fitted, long-sleeved t-shirt. I let my eyes cascade down his body and linger on the bulge that rested beneath his navy sweat pants. Every bit of my being wanted him to hop in my back seat so that I could release the swell from his pants and engulf it in sweet, deep kisses. I need to get the hell out of here. His body grazed against mine as I attempted to slide past him. Heaven help me! Beyond flustered, I blurted out, “Mike, I really do need to go. I’ll call you this week. I’m planni
ng an event and I actually would like for you to be a part of it if possible, so I’ll be in touch with the details, okay?”
“Alright Ms. Erin, yet again I will let you go. I’ll wait to hear from you.” Mike swaggered toward his car as I took off speed-walking over to Angela’s.
“Girrrrrrl, things were getting hot and heavy over there! I was trying to rescue you before you got arrested for indecent exposure in the park,” Angie exclaimed. “That man is dangerous if you plan to keep your panties in place. You won’t even have to touch them, they’ll just melt right off! If you intend to keep up this celibacy thing, you’d better not be alone with him too long! I could tell from your little encounter that you were on the verge of taking him home and getting yourself into a whole lot of ‘setback’!”
I laughed, but I knew it was true. “Thanks!” I sighed gratefully. “I’m gonna call you this week to talk about us potentially using the Miami trip as a little birthday excursion! Oh yeah, by the way, in case Feliz hasn’t already told you, I think I may be an artist!” I laughed as made my way back to the space where I was parked. Seeing Mike had me feeling invigorated, but it was the kind of energy that needed to be burned off. I couldn’t wait to get home and paint. With each passing day, the more I explored, the more liberated and empowered I felt. At that moment, my heart was full as I thought about all the wonderful new experiences that had happened for me thus far. It made me even more excited about the possibility of things to come. The day and my future were full of promise and finally, it felt like I had a new beginning.
Chapter Eighteen
“Hey Ange! So let’s talk about all things birthday related! I was thinking we could turn our Miami trip into your birthday getaway! You could mention it to the girls and see what they think, but if they can’t come, we could still go down and have a ball! Plus, they have a Family Run 10K in Orlando that we can participate in first and then drive down to Miami! Please. Say. Yes! I promise we’ll have a blast! We may never do this again. I know it’s two trips in a year, and I am not in a position to ask you to do it, because I am not on any shifts at present, but pleeeeaaaaase say yes!
“Damn girl! Come up for air!” Angie sounded exhausted just hearing my long plea. “So, let me get this straight.” Oh hell, it’s never good when she starts off like that. I sighed and waited for her to continue. “You want me to take off from work again so we can go to Miami for my birthday? I don’t know Erin, I’ll have to think about that. Ummm… HELL YES!! Whether the rest of the girls can come or not, I’m down!”
That was all the go ahead I needed. As soon as I for off the phone I registered Angie and I for the Disney Family 10K, booked a hotel room in Orlando and upgraded the room in Miami to a suite. I knew once Amber and Feliz found out Angie was on board and thought it was all about her birthday, they’d be on board for the trip.
Even though the run wasn’t quite a half marathon—in fact, it wasn’t even a third of a marathon—I was still excited to participate in the race and to spend a little extra time with my friends. This would be the getaway that Vegas should have been, with no pesky penis distractions to keep us from our female bonding. I snickered to myself at that thought. In just three weeks’ time we would all be in sunny Florida and I could hardly wait.
As the weeks passed, I painted and on occasion, shared my progress with Josh and Mike via text. Neither of them had seen any of my recent work in person and I liked that since I wanted it to be somewhat of a surprise at my event. I continued to run at the park and Mike met me there whenever he was available. We talked while we ran and the time always seemed to go faster that I wanted it to, but I was glad to be learning more about him as a person.
Once I found out Feliz and Amber were in, I booked flights for myself and Angie to Orlando and got tickets for Amber and Feliz to meet us in Miami. They were happy to get away to the warmer weather and were thrilled when they found out I was footing the bill! It was a small gesture considering I’d planned to ask them to go skydiving once we got there. I was hoping that if I couldn’t bribe them, then I could guilt them once we made it to Florida.
In addition to everything else, I was still working out the details for what I hoped would be an upcoming showcase. I have no idea how to do this. I chewed my lip thoughtfully. This wasn’t the same as giving a lecture or doing a presentation. This was both a performance and a display that would expose not only my voice, but my artwork. The thought of it all twisted my stomach into a giant knot. Without a second thought, I grabbed the phone and dialed Mike’s number. I knew he would have some sound advice for me. Suddenly butterflies were fluttering around the knot in my stomach. It happened every time I dialed Mike’s number. Every. Damned. Time. I always grappled with not wanting him to answer and longing to hear his voice. He was the only man I could recall that had the power to make me nervous. Secretly that fact alone drew me to him.
The phone rang twice before his voice enveloped my ear in a satiny, “Hello.”
My voice caught in my throat and I croaked out, “Hi Mike. It’s Erin.” I sounded exactly like a prepubescent boy. Sexy. I thought with an eye roll.
“Hey Erin baby… So glad to hear from you!” As he spoke a bit more, I realized he was speaking through his half-asleep state. Before I had time to regret calling, I started in on the reason for my call.
“Hey, remember I told you I was working on an event? I had this amazing idea that we could do something together. I have some poems I’ve written, and I was thinking that maybe you could put them to music, and I could paint while your band performs. What do you think?”
“I think it sounds great! The only thing that would make it better would be if we put a mike on you and let you sing the song yourself or you could even perform it as spoken word over our musical background!”
“Now there you go changing my idea! I don’t know about performing.” I didn’t try to hide the uncertainty in my voice. “Right now I’m really still getting my feet wet with this painting thing and that’s what I’m most drawn to at the moment. Then again, singing on stage would be something new.” I pondered it a moment. And it is on my bucket list. “Let’s cross that bridge if we come to it, okay?”
“Alright, alright! We’ll do it your way Erin. I’m honored that you even want me to be a part of it. Maybe one day you’ll feel comfortable with letting us be a part of your singing debut, as well. Would you be interested in doing an art exhibit down the line?” He paused for a moment and when I didn’t respond, his tone changed a bit. “Listen to me planning events for you. I haven’t even seen much of your art or even read your poetry. I guess that’s just how much I believe in you. I know anything you decide to do will be amazing because you’re amazing!” His words literally warmed my heart and a smile spread across my face. I was happier than I should have been and touched that he had so much faith in me.
“Thank you Mike.” I said softly. “That means a lot to me.” I was glad he couldn’t see the rose tint dusting my cheeks. What is it about this man that makes me blush all the damned time?! I dismissed my thoughts and returned to the business at hand. Regardless of if he made me glow like a light bulb, I was determined to maintain some form of professionalism about all of this. “When would be a good time to get together and discuss the details and for you to take a look at you some of my poetry?”
“Whenever you want sweetheart, I’ve been waiting for you to call. Even if it isn’t to tell me you’ve decided to give us a try.” Cute. “I’ll take what I can get! You let me know when and where and I’m there. I think we should meet one-on-one before bringing the band in. You and I can work on some musical arrangements. Don’t worry, we’ll get it together and make it an incredible performance!”
His vote of confidence made me feel more assured and I was happy he was keeping things somewhat professional too. “Okay, I’ll be heading to Miami in a few weeks so we can get together after that. I’m excited! Thanks again! Talk to you soon.”
I dialed Feliz next to ask her if she wanted to j
oin me for another art class and told her about my showcase idea. “Sure! Whenever you decide to go, let me know. I’d love to join you. I guess I could use more practice. Do you know Mario had the nerve to say my bowl of lemons looked like a bowl of buttered popcorn?!” Feliz sounded only partially offended, but I stifled my laugh anyway. “As for the showcase idea, it all sounds great Erin. I know it will be amazing.” It was nice to know that everyone had so much confidence in my ability. I wasn’t completely sold yet, but I was starting to believe in myself a little more with every encouraging word. It felt foreign to be anything less than confident, but I took it as a sign of growth. Everything shouldn’t feel comfortable all the time. I’ve been settled long enough. It’s time to shake things up. Feliz interrupted my internal coaching session with a barrage of questions. “So how’s the painting going? Have you worked on anything new?
